Attachment

The superordinate theme of attachment described the bond between the TAs and the child they were supporting. The emergent themes under this superordinate theme were trust, the nature of the bond between the TA and child, the special or unique nature of the relationship, challenges in the relationship and detachment.

Trust

In their interviews the TAs talked about their relationship in varying ways. One significant emergent theme was that of trust and many of the TAs talked about trust in their relationship. Trust came up in different forms. Firstly, there were descriptions of trust the child had in the TA; secondly, there was the mutual trust the child and TA had in the relationship and thirdly, there was the idea of safety and security in the relationship. Two of the TAs didn’t raise trust as an important feature of their relationships.

When the TAs talked about trust the child had in them they articulated this idea in a number of ways. For example, when Anna noted that, “my relationship with A is built solely on trust” (A100) and she went on to say that this was something that was built over time “to the point where he would trust me with any situation that he is in” (A113). To her trust was also a reciprocal phenomenon and that, “we built a real good trust together” (A105). Once this trust had been established with A, she noted, “he trusted me enough to tell me how he was feeling” (A193). Beth noted a similar feeling of trust in the

relationship when she noted that “I think our relationship has got to the point where it has developed enough for him to be able to tell me things” (B114) and that “I think he has just developed that kind of need for me” (B94).

For Dena, trust was something that she articulated throughout her interview. In one example she talked about how she developed her relationship at the beginning by letting D tell her about what he was doing so that “we sort of… started at that point, building a relationship, so he was sort of guiding me through things” (D63). However, as their relationship developed she described a pivotal moment when D was anxious about going up to receive his pen licence for handwriting. She noted that “he did start coming up and saying: "oh, actually, I'm a bit nervous about this and I'm a bit nervous about that". So hopefully that means it is a bit more comfortable to say things he is worried about, now” (D95). The trust that was developing between Dena and D was further articulated when Dena said, “so it is trusting that, you know, maybe someone else might have another view” (D132).

For Frances, she reflected the difficulties in her relationship with F when she said, “our relationship is struggling at the moment” (F196) and she attributed this in large part to external factors such as the teacher leaving and her feelings of not being experienced enough for him or being supported in school. However, despite the difficulties she

expressed in the relationship with F she did note that “I think….he trusts me” (F377) even though she then went on to note the difficulties that were in their relationship.

In Emma’s case, she felt that trust was about being there for E and she articulated this when she said, “just as long as she knows I am there for her I think that helps a great deal” (E154). However, Emma expressed the idea of becoming too close to E when she noted, “I do not want her to rely on me too much” (E206) and that “I do not want it to be a too intense relationship” (E203).

The idea of mutual trust in the relationship, was expressed by Anna when she said, “so we have a good trusting relationship” (A125). For example, when she said “even though I was not working with him we still had this very very good relationship that he was able to tell me what was going on and how he was feeling” (A172) reflected the trust that had developed between them. Beth articulated a similar theme when she noted, “I think our relationship has got to the point where it has developed enough for him to be able to tell me things” (B114). Indeed, she went further by saying that “when he is finding the world extremely tricky, he just needs somebody that will…that he can rely on” (B220).

Dena expressed the idea of mutual trust when she described how, at first, “it was me very much going up to him checking if he was alright” (D250) but that later she didn’t feel the need to do this as D “would ask, put his hand up and ask for help with certain things, which he would not have done before” (D256).

In relation to the emergent theme of safety and security in the relationship this was expressed by Beth when she said, “he knows what he is doing and he feels happy and safe” (B388) whilst Anna noted that “I wanted him to know that he was safe and I think that was a big, important thing for A to know he was safe” (A106).

For Clare, the theme of trust was not one that she articulated in her interview. Whilst she did note, “I would say that we have got a good relationship” (C34) she tended to focus more on the difficulties in the relationship with C. Indeed, she struggled to connect with him and establish a bond, illustrated when she said, "I am not very fond of him" (C181) and that “I know that he is going to continue to struggle probably more and more the further up the school he gets” (C182).

The nature of the TA-pupil bond

Another aspect of attachment in the relationships was indicated in the way that the TAs spoke of the bond between them and child. The emergent themes of togetherness, empathy, building a relationship and teamwork were ones that were evident in

descriptions of the relationships the TAs had with the children they were supporting. Beth noted the closeness she had with B when she talked about using non-verbal

communication and that there was “the attachment I suppose, he has learnt…he looks for me sometimes when he does not know what is going on” (B328). She qualified this later when she said, “I think sometimes he forms an attachment because he is familiar and the familiarisation perhaps is key” (B360).

The idea of building up the relationship was one that three of the TAs raised. Anna noted that “we have built up a very, very good relationship” (A112) whilst Dena noted that “we sort of..started at that point, building a relationship” (D63) and later that “it is very important to me that we sort of built one, not necessarily rushing it to be quite quick” (D407). The idea that a relationship was one that evolved over time and was built was also expressed by Frances when she noted, “I was really proud of him, you build up a massive relationship with the children, they are not your own, but you are responsible for them” (F334).

The emergent theme of togetherness and teamwork was also one that TAs used to

describe the bond they had in their relationship. Anna noted that she was proud of A “that he had come that far in the years we have been together” (A201) and that “we have always got through it, we have always got through it” (A225), emphasising that it had been a journey together through both good and difficult times. Beth also noted the idea of togetherness through difficult times when she said, “I always say to him, I am here to help you, we can do this together” (B281). Dena noted, in her example of D going up to get his pen licence, that “we sort of talked him through – we are just going to take it up, it will be fine” (D88) and that this togetherness helped D overcome his anxiety. Emma expressed the idea of teamwork and togetherness when she gave an example of when a boy came over to E and asked to help her with making a mask “whereas normally she would not allow that but I kind of asked her and she was yeah…well she didn’t say yeah but told her that was what was happening and she was fine with it” (E163). Emma went further in the idea of togetherness when she extended this to other adults when she stated, “I think we need more…well not more support but just every adult on board” (E177) and that working together produced a better outcome for E. Frances, however, did not talk about togetherness as her relationship with F was more problematic. For example, she described F as being “quite bright and so he can do any of the work that I am given for him to do” (F18) but that he often refused to engage. Indeed, Frances questioned F’s ability to engage when she noted “It is odd, you do not know how he feels about a

particular.. I have no idea. Whether he is indifferent” (F83) and her relationship with him appeared to be very much one-way in that he controlled the interactions. Therefore, for Frances it appeared to be difficult for her to establish that connection that could then develop into working together in the relationship.

Empathy was something that Anna expressed when she said, “yes, well there was a lot of empathy I obviously felt for A” (A186) and this manifested itself in her wanting to reassure him, particularly in relation to his grandfather’s illness. Dena expressed empathy as well when she talked about D’s anxiety about getting his pen licence and she noted, “I was trying to talk to him about, you know, he is good enough, you got to go up” (D153).

Clare, on the other hand, found it difficult to express empathy for C as she struggled to relate to him. She often used language that distanced herself from him emotionally such as “I mean really with a child like him” (C139) and “he does not engage at all with what you are doing” (C142) such that she expressed difficulties with connecting to him. Emma also noted that E “does not give a lot back” (E97) but she did show empathy for her when she said, “just as long as she knows I am there for her” (E154) and her description of the time when a boy came over to E and wanted to help her make a mask (E160) also showed empathy for E.

Special or unique nature of the relationship

This subordinate theme was evident in four of the TAs’ interviews. When Anna noted that she was called in to work with A when he was having a difficult time over his

grandfather’s illness she described a special type of relationship that was almost unique to them with her being the one who was able to reach out to A at a difficult time. As she noted, “he immediately opened up to me and told me what the problems were” (A147) and that ‘he had not spoken to anybody else about that’ (A150). Beth noted in her

interview that “I know what works and what does not work for him” (B215) whilst Dena said, “it’s knowing I can trust, if I ask him to do something because we have got that relationship. I know him” (D415). Emma gave a good example of their unique

calming to her” (E145). However, for Frances there wasn’t that sense of the special or unique nature of their relationship as she found it hard to connect with F and develop that quality of relationship. When she said, “I do not know if he cares at all” (F380) and that it is “very difficult to be emotionally attached to this particular child” (F386) there was a strong sense of Frances’s frustrations in the relationship with F. This was a similar story for Clare as she articulated the difficulties with the relationship very easily but she didn’t express the special or unique relationship with C even when there was “a light bulb moment when he does respond which is quite rewarding when he does, but to be honest it is quite short-lived, those sort of times” (C268).

Challenges in the relationship

The subordinate theme of challenge in the relationships was evident in five of the TAs’ interviews. Indeed, for two of the TAs this was one of the most dominant themes that emerged from their interviews. Anna’s relationship with A was largely a positive one but she also noted the challenges that resulted in her work with him. For example, she noted that “there have certainly been challenging times, there is no doubt about that” (A226) but she emphasised that this was to be expected for a child with ASD and complex needs. Beth also noted difficulties in her relationship with B when she noted, “I think that has been quite challenging, is to get him to respond when you need to” (B260) and revealed how hard it could be getting B to engage with her. For Clare her relationship with C was difficult and this was evident throughout her interview. For example, she noted, “there are definitely times when it is quite tough and you just think “oh my goodness I do not think I am doing the right thing for him”” (C261). She also noted that difficulties in their relationship were caused by external factors such as C’s sensory needs (C300) and the school not having the correct equipment for him (C318). Dena expressed the idea of challenge in the development of her relationship with D when she noted that “so you feel

you do have to work because a lot of things do not work when you are trying to help them if you do not have the relationship there” (D293). For her the challenge in the relationship had been very much the investment of a lot of hard work over time. Emma felt that her control of the relationship through being strict was the answer to challenges in their relationship. For example, she noted that E “has hit other people but she has never hit me” which she attributed to “I do not know whether it is the different style of…like I say I am quite strict” (E116).

However, for Frances her relationship with F was very challenging and this came across throughout the interview with her. For example, she stated, “I have struggled with it to be honest. It is quite taking, he is taking from you, you do not get much back really” (F350).

Detachment

The theme of detachment was evident in all the TAs’ interviews. For Anna this was encapsulated in her concern that A became as independent as possible and that getting too close was perhaps detrimental to A. She explained that “sometimes I think we can be a bit too close, and then I have to stand back and I have to rethink what is going on” (A210). Indeed, she emphasised this powerfully when she said, “I want for A to cope without me at the end of the day” (A393). Clare, however, struggled to relate to C and detachment in their relationship was reflected in the language she used to talk about C. For example, she noted, “I am not very fond of him” (C181) and this impacted on their relationship to the extent that she felt that “he is not into what you are trying to do with him at all” (C208). Detachment was also evident in Frances’s interview when she used detached language to talk about F. For example, she used the phrase “a child like him” (F176) and “with autistic children” (F353) rather than using his name, which depersonalised the

“because she does not give a lot back” (E97). She further noted, “I obviously don’t want her to become too attached to me” (E199) and “I don’t want it to be a too intense

relationship” (E204).