There are three specific qualities you need to portray in order to attract the women you’ve always wanted. Failing to follow these can results in rejection, awkward situations or confusion. Use this formula and relate it to your own experiences with women and pinpoint where things may be going wrong.
As you can see the above graph is a circle divided into three equal sections.
They are in the form of a circle because each is equally important and all must be done. Let’s briefly define each step of this formula.
Confident – To make women comfortable by being confident Playful – To make women interested by playfully with them
Sexual – To make women desire you by strategically communicating your interest
Let’s detail each of these qualities and provide examples to make it easier to understand.
Confident Flirting
HE JUST: said I look like a dork in this hat.
THAT MEANS: he’s confident and independent. He’s not kissing up to me like all the other guys and isn’t trying to get anything from me, or is he? I like him.
Can you see how telling a woman she looks like a dork works so well? While this behavior may seem mean or fake you must realize something. Look at these two examples to better understand the concept that’s about to change your perception forever.
Example #1
A young man was brought up into a rich household and grew up with
everything he ever wanted. He had the latest sports car, his own apartment and all the best suits. All he had to do was ask his father for his credit card. This man even got a job because of his father’s business connections.
The Result: This man didn’t value his success.
Example #2
A young man grew up with his single mother who earned just enough money to survive. He spent 2 hours traveling on three buses and a train to attend college for which he paid for himself by working two part time jobs. He eventually opened up a successful and profitable business from the knowledge he acquired in college.
The Result: This man valued his success.
As you can see both men grew up with very different lifestyles. The big difference was the second man valued everything while the first man didn’t.
Which brings us to a fundamental rule about life and dating women.
That which is not earned is not valued.
• Don’t treat women special just because you like them.
• Don’t call women every day and crave their attention.
• Don’t jump at every opportunity to do women’s gardening, laundry and fix their electrical problems.
• Don’t reveal your life story and problems to women early on.
• Don’t bitch, snicker and base your conversations around negativity.
No matter what personality, interest or background, every single woman is
looking for confident man that engages her mind with mystery and challenge.
Without these attributes men don’t provide women with any real value for choosing a boyfriend. They aren’t looking for men to baby-sit, they’re looking for a protector, provider and lover. Men who act super-eager and horny repel
women very quickly.
• If you’re difficult to impress, women need to work to impress you.
• If women need to work, they need to earn you.
• If women need to earn you, they value you.
This is quite a shift in thinking, isn’t it?
Think of it this way. A door-to-door salesmen get rejected the second you find out he is trying to “sell you something.” Similarly, very attractive women will reject you the second she finds out you like her if you’ve communicated it in some stupid obvious way. Here’s how to make women value you:
• Courageously approach her cool and calm to show you’re not scared or super eager.
• Tease her by treating her like “just a buddy” to prove you’re not just interested in her looks
• Act playfully unimpressed to show you have real value.
• Be firm if she’s late, make sure she respects your time.
People may read this and think, “This earn/value rule doesn’t apply to dating.
Dating is totally different.” Unfortunately this is basic human psychology that is relevant in all situations. Why don’t women date men who desperately want them? Women don’t find these men challenging. What is not earned is not valued.
Here are 8 great flirting techniques to project confidence to let women know you’re extremely valuable. These techniques attract women and position you as one of the most unique guys she’s met in a long time.
Tongue Poke
At some point during conversation poke your tongue out at the woman.
This is extremely playful and she’ll probably start playing along with your flirtatious behavior. Use it when there’s a silence, when she’s waiting for you to respond to her question or just in the middle of the conversation.
Where’d She Go?
After talking for some time you can walk up to her and look over her head as if you’re looking for something. You can then say, “Where did Sarah go?”
Don’t stand too close just close enough to get the point across. You’ll usually get a playful hit for this one because it implies that she’s short. If you’re the same height or just a little bit shorter stand on your toes to add some extra height. Being the same height can actually make this technique work better because it’s sarcastic humor. You’re saying she’s short even though she’s clearly level with your height. If you’re feeling extra confident even say this to a
woman who’s taller than you.
Stand in Front
While talking, stand in front of her and playfully point something out in the distance and saying something like, “Wow, check out that wall, that’s really cool”.
Women usually find it uncomfortable for men to enter their personal space when they’ve just met but what you’re doing is standing in front of her with your back facing her. This technique also works great when she’s waiting for her question to be answered or during an uncomfortable silence in the conversation. Doing something playful like this can spice things up if they’ve gone dull. The idea is to use something very plain so she knows you’re not being serious. If you said,
“Hey check out that plane” and actually meant it, she would think you’re rude and arrogant. This communicates you’re flirty and playful but not going to drop everything for her. You have power and no one’s going to take that away from you.
Walk Away
As you flirt with her playfully walk away from something she says.
This technique works great if you do it for something meaningless and pointless.
If she says, “I like pink clothes”, you can say, “Oh I don’t think I can be seen talking to you anymore” and walk away. Don’t use this technique to walk away from something offensive. If she said something like, “You’re so cute, just like a teddy bear”, and you walk away you’re communicating you’re easily upset and can’t keep your cool. The idea is to be playful so the sillier the reason for walking away the funnier and more successful it’ll be.
Arms of Steel
Look at her arm then just squeeze it near her shoulder with a surprised look on your face.
You can then say, “Wow, I wouldn’t want to meet you in a dark alley. Arm’s of steel!”
implying she’s a huge masculine man.
Touching: Only use this technique if you feel the woman is already comfortable
around you or else she’ll feel endangered by physical contact. Humor is based on opposites and sarcasm so don’t use this technique if she has large arms for a woman, otherwise you’d be teasing her insecurities and that’s not what you want. Of course no woman wants to feel masculine because they’re a women, so by implying she’s masculine when she clearly not becomes funny.
Sympathetic Pat
When she makes a comment about something that seems funny or strange simply look at her sympathetically and pat her on the head.
For example if she said, “I likes shopping at X shopping mall”, you can pat her on the head and say, “It’s ok”. This implies she needs better taste. Use it in response to her clothes, quirky hobbies or other harmless things. Remember these techniques are supposed to be playful, use them when things are silly and inoffensive. Again only use this technique when you’ve spoken for a few
minutes and gained her trust.
Embarrassed or Weird Look
Give her an embarrassed or weird look for something she says or does.
Again when she makes a comment about something, for example you may say, “What brand are those sunglasses?” And she says, “Oh these are
(expensive fashionable brand)”, if you give her an embarrassed look it implies she has no taste. You can use this technique when she answers your question or does something silly. Of course this embarrassed look is suppose to be fun and playfully, if you look serious you’ll scare the woman off very fast. Unlike the above technique, this technique can be used the moment you introduce yourself to a woman because it doesn’t involve touching.
Catch Me If You Can
Grab or take an item of hers and playfully keep it from her.
If you’ve been talking for a while you can ask to look at some sort of bracelet or hat she’s wearing. Then when she asks for it back you can make her playfully try and grab it back. If she doesn’t ask for it back you can get things going by saying something like, “Hmm, I think I’m going to keep this”. Then pretend to give it back and quickly move your hand when she tries to grab it. This flirting technique is very similar to how an older child would play with his younger brother or sister. This flirtatious behavior is lots of fun and women love it if you’re smiling and laughing as you’re doing it.
Playful Flirting
HE JUST: grabbed my hands and started playing a slapping game to decide if he’s cooler than me.
THAT MEANS: he’s social, playful and knows how to have more fun than all those jocks out there. He doesn’t take things too seriously. I like him.
Can you see how there is some subtle tension and conflict within this example? If a man is playfully communicating he is cooler than a woman he is disagreeing.
For most men the thought of disagreeing with women sounds absurd. Why would you want to get into a conflict with a woman you’re interested in?
First, we’re not talking about a serious fight. We’re talking about a playful flirtatious conflict. Remember women are attracted to the feelings men give them. And the feelings of a playful battle are very emotionally intense.
Playful conflicts focused on women create emotionally intense conversations that attract women.
Its obvious women want somebody interesting and fun to hang out with. But often all the things men know about being fun and interesting in social situations go out the window the minute they start talking to a beautiful woman. I say,
“talking” because rather than flirting with women they think they’re being fresh and original by asking boring demographic questions like:
Where do you live?
How old are you?
Where do you work?
What’s your family like?
Do you have any pets?
What’s your brother’s, best friends’ favorite color?
There is nothing wrong with these questions, but unless you add in playful disagreement women won’t feel attracted to you. The problem with
demographic questions is, once started, it’s very difficult to transition into a more fun and interesting conversation.
Of course you can use these questions if done correctly. Asking a woman “Where do you live?” and then playfully transitioning into an emotionally intense
argument about why your neighborhood is cooler than hers puts you on the right track.
If you playfully build conflict you build tension.
If you build tension you build intense emotion.
If you build intense emotion you attract women.
As you can see sometimes the strangest ideas work in ways we couldn’t imagine.
What you must remember is that women are different creatures; they feel
attraction for men completely differently. Emotion is much more powerful than a man’s looks. So what ways can you build conflict? The most powerful way to evoke emotion is to focus on the woman. Here are 5 examples of playful flirting.
Playfully settle verbal arguments in silly ways and always make sure you win.
Thumb Wrestling
Challenge her to a thumb war to settle a playful argument. While having a playful argument over something like who is the coolest, who’s shoes are more stylish or who’s neighborhood rocks the most challenge her to a thumb war to determine who is right. It’s childish but extremely playful and emotionally intense. Always make sure you win, so feel free to use your other hand to cheat.
This shows you’re easy going and don’t take things too seriously. If she
genuinely gets upset from your cheating you know you’ve found a very serious uninteresting woman.
Playfully steal something of value to her.
Photo Snatch
Ask to see her wallet and take out her photo ID and make fun of it. If she doesn’t want to show you, show her your photo ID first and make fun of it if it looks silly. Almost every single woman hates other people looking at their photo IDs.
She’ll most likely try and snatch it back from you as fast as possible because the photo was taken when she had a hairstyle she didn’t like or when she was much younger. If she’s not ashamed of the photo it’s hard to be playful about it; just play it as it goes.
Playfully provoke her in someway.
Playing Poker
Ask her if she’s any good at poker and then poke her ticklish area around the waist and hips. Realize that touching a woman is a big deal when you start dating, people only feel comfortable with others touching if they trust them. If the woman trusts you poke her around the rib cage where she’s most ticklish.
The first date might not be the best time to engage in this playful behavior. It just depends on how comfortable you make her feel around you. Even the second date might not be the right time for this; just make your own judgments. If you’re not sure leave it.
Playfully insist she is wrong about something.
Shoulder Tap
Tap her on the shoulder and quickly turn around denying it was you. This technique is childish but works like a charm. Tap the woman on her shoulder when she’s not looking then turn away. Whether you turn away in time or not doesn’t matter. Let her catch you turning away with a big smile on your face.
Continue to look away or look around the room with a silly face to avoid eye contact. You can finish by saying something like, “It wasn’t me! It was that guy on the other side of the room! I swear! He just ran back over there really really fast… honest.”
Playfully contrast the current situation.
Mr. Serious
When you’re both having a fun, great time, laughing and giggling put on the most serious straight face you can make and say, “Ok, ok… we’re having too much fun. Stop it! No more fun!” If you’re in a highly energetic and playful mood, she’ll stop for a second and then burst into laughter. Or she may play along. In that case put on your most serious face together with a really monotone voice and start saying things like, ”Ok… So do you have a house? Yep me too I have a house.” “Wow, that’s fascinating. Hmmm… So do you like stuff?” Say something completely obvious and say it with the most serious face you can.
While you’re having a boring conversation you’re actually communicating that you understand boring conversations and making fun of them in the process. As long as you’re doing this after something completely fun and playful this will be hilarious.
Sexual Flirting
While friends talk about hobbies, the weekend and gossip there is one form of communication that two friends never engage in together. Flirting is more than telling jokes, being funny and being confident.
Intent
Sexual flirting speaks right to a woman’s core and allows her to understand you in her language. While men tend to think very logically and straight down the line, women think emotionally.
When interested in men women hit and tease them , while women who aren’t interest tend to stay in demographical “So where do you live?” sorts of conversations. She can be ‘interested’ in your conversations, which can go for hours, but she’ll never feel ‘attracted’ to you.
Why?
Women are different creatures; therefore they think, feel and act differently. If
you want women to realize you’re the man she’s been searching for you need to speak suggestively. You don’t do this by saying how beautiful she looks but rather by saying she’s a bad girl. While sexual flirting is probably the most powerful type of flirting that exists, it is also the most difficult to understand.
What makes this form of flirting so powerful is the intent. Instead of just talking about each other you’re playfully suggesting that you should ‘be together’
without actually saying it. If you said, ‘you know, we would fight all the time’
you’re communicating the possibility of dating without saying stupid like, ‘I think you’re very beautiful and I’ve liked you for a long time now. Will you go out with me?’
If you add sexual innuendos and suggestive comments to your emotionally intense playful arguments or conflicts you’ll create magic.
Suggest Attraction
“It’s because you want me”
Be bold. Be brave and say this with confidence. You never know she may start to like you after your confident statement. She doesn’t have to like you but the idea of sexual flirting is getting women to think about the statements you say. You can recycle this joke over and over during your interaction by saying, “Sarah! Stop liking me so much!”
Be bold. Be brave and say this with confidence. You never know she may start to like you after your confident statement. She doesn’t have to like you but the idea of sexual flirting is getting women to think about the statements you say. You can recycle this joke over and over during your interaction by saying, “Sarah! Stop liking me so much!”