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T TAABBLLEEOOFFCCOONNTTEENNTTS ... 3 S G GEETTTTIINNGGSSTTAARRTTEEDDRRIIGGHHTT ... 4Establishing Coaching Session Topic ... 4
Establishing Session Goals ... 4
The First Session ... 4
G GOOAALLSS ... 5
Setting Coaching Goals ... 5
Setting Annual Goals ... 6
Goal ECOLOGY ... 6
Refining Goals – Making them SMART ... 8
G GeettttiinnggUUNNSSTTUUCCK ... 9 K Making Decisions and Moving Forwards ... 10
A ACCTTIIOONNS ... 10 S Brainstorming Action Options ... 10
Choosing Actions to Move Forwards With ... 11
Identifying and Removing Obstacles ... 12
Reviewing Why Actions Have Not Been Completed ... 12
C COOMMMMIITTMMEENNTTaannddAACCCCOOUUNNTTAABBIILLIITTYY ... 13
Establishing Inner and Outer Resources ... 13
Gaining Commitment ... 13 Creating Accountability ... 14 R REEVVIIEEWWIINNGGPPrrooggrreessssaannddRREEFFOOCCUUSSIINNGG... 14 C CEELLEEBBRRAATTIINNG ... 15 G S SEELLFF--DDIISSCCOOVVEERRYY ... 15 Identifying Strengths ... 15 Identifying Values ... 16
Gremlins and Limiting Beliefs ... 16
Developing Self-Belief ... 18
Uncovering Self and Identity ... 19
Accessing Intuition, Inner Wisdom and Inspiration ... 19
G GrreeaattPPOOWWEERRFFUULLQQuueessttiioonnss! ... 20 !
5 Catch-all Questions for When YOU Don't Know What to Ask! ... 20
On People and Relationships ... 20
Miscellaneous Powerful Questions! ... 21
O OtthheerrUUsseeffuullQQuueessttiioonnss ... 22
Softening Tough Questions ... 22
Dealing with Talkative Clients ... 22
Responding to "I Don't Know" ... 22
W Wrraappppiinngguupp... 23
Wrapping up a Session ... 23
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1.. "So, how have you been?" (Great open-ended question to drill down from)
2
2.. "What would a home run in your life look like this week?" (Make a list)
3
3.. "What's been working for you since our last session?"
4
4.. "What hasn't been working for you?"
5
5.. "What do you need most from me today?"
6
6.. "So, what have been your 'highlights' since our last session?"
7
7.. "So, what have been your 'lowlights' since our last session?"
8
8.. "I'm curious, how do you think I can help you this week?"
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9.. "What, if you got it finished this week, would make you jump for joy?"
1
100.. "What is the biggest change you are willing to make today?"
1
111.. "What would you love to have happen by the end of this session?"
1
122.. "What would you most like to get out of the next 30/45/60 minutes?"
1
133.. "What would be the most helpful thing for you to take away from this session?"
1
144.. "What if you worked on it right NOW, would REALLY put a smile on your face?"
1
155.. "Imagine you've just had an ideal week. What 3 things did you complete?"
1
166.. "What could we work on that would help you the most over the next few weeks?"
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177.. "Tell me about yourself…"
1
188.. "What specific goals would you like to meet by working with a coach?"
1
199.. "What have you already done towards your goals?"
2
200.. "How will we evaluate the success of the coaching at the end?"
2
211.. "What kind of coach would you like me to be for you?"
2
222.. "What are you expecting from the coaching?"
2
233.. "What do you need most from me during our coaching?"
2
244.. "What is the one thing I should not do/say to you?"
2
255.. "What is the most exciting part of working with a coach?"
2
266.. "What is the scariest part of working with a coach?"
2
277.. "What is the biggest change you are willing to make today?"
2
288.. "What is one thing you will do immediately after our session today?" You may also like
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299.. "What are you tolerating/putting up with?" (Make a list)
3
300.. "What do you love?" (Make a list)
3
311.. "What do you hate?" (Make a list)
3
322.. "What are your current issues?" (Make a list)
3
333.. "What's bugging you right now?" (Make a list)
3
344.. "What excites and inspires you?" (Make a list)
3
355.. "What would you like as a goal if you knew you could not fail?"
3
366.. "What bothers you the most right now?"
3
377.. "What's one/three/five things you would love to do before you die?"
3
388.. "If you were to FULLY live your life, what is the first change you would start to make?"
3
399.. "What do you secretly yearn for?"
4
400.. "What is missing in your life right now?"
4
411.. "What areas of your life could be upgraded or tweaked?"
4
422.. "What are the 3 things that would make the biggest difference in your life?"
4
433.. "What do you really, really want?"
4
444.. "If you dared say it aloud, what would you make happen in your career/life?"
4
455.. "If you won the lottery, what would you do?"
4
466.. "If you could do anything at all, what would be your ideal career/life?"
4
477.. "If there was an outcome you were secretly looking for, what would it be?"
4
488.. "What could we work on that would make the biggest difference to your life?"
4
499.. "What are three things you are doing regularly that don't serve or support you?"
5
500.. "For your life to be perfect, what would have to change?"
5
511.. "What's one change you could make that would give you more peace/calm?"
5
522.. "What do you really, really want?"
5
533.. "If you are 90 years old and looking back over your life, what have you done to make you feel proud?"
5
544.. "What's your dream for this lifetime?"
5
555.. "If you were to FULLY live your life, what is the first change you would start to make?"
5
566.. "What would have happened in 6 months that your life/career/business is doing better than you could have expected?"
5
577.. And why not stretch your clients? "How would you feel about doubling that goal?"
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588.. "What is your THEME for the upcoming year - in one word?"
5
599.. "Where do you want to be in 10 years?"
Then, "What do you need to achieve in the next year to make sure that happens?"
6
600.. "What would you like MORE of in your life?"
6
611.. "What would you like LESS of in your life?"
6
622.. "What do you WANT in life, but don't have?"
6
633.. "What do you HAVE in your life, but DON'T want?"
6
644.. "What you are most excited about for the coming year?"
6
655.. "What do you already know you want to accomplish this coming year?"
6
666.. "What is your biggest challenge in the upcoming year?"
6
677.. "What are your 3 biggest priorities for the upcoming year?"
6
688.. "If you did nothing else in the next year, what 3 things would still make the year a success for you?"
You may also like
• Our *NEW* Coaching Exercise: Annual Goal-Setting Worksheet
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699.. "How can we make this something you're aiming towards, rather than something you're trying to move away from?"
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700.. "How can you make this goal a positive statement of what you want to achieve?" T
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"Why?" is a question we try to avoid - except in relation to goals. When it comes to goals, the clearer a client is about WHY they want to achieve a goal the more committed they will be to achieving it.
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711.. "How serious are you about this?"
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722.. "Why do you want your goal?"
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733.. "Why is this goal important to you?"
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744.. "What are the outcomes - what will come out when you achieve your goals?"
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755.. "Can you imagine your desired outcome? How will achieving this goal benefit you?"
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766.. "What will happen when you get your goal?"
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777.. "What is most important to you about your goal? What MUST happen?"
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788.. "Why did you choose this goal?"
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799.. "If you got this goal, what would it do for you?"
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800.. "What are your required outcomes?"
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822.. "If you could have this goal RIGHT NOW – would you take it?" *
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833.. "If you had this goal, how would you BE different?"
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844.. "Just suppose for a moment that you can have your goal, what is it like?"
8
855.. "How important are your goals to you personally?" (Use scale of 1-10 for each)
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866.. "How will making this change affect other areas of your life?"
8
877.. "Is this goal only for you?" * You may also like
• Our Coaching Article: The Must-Ask Question for ALL Goals!
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888.. "How important is this goal to YOU personally?" (Ask your clients to use scale of 1-10. To
be congruent, you're ideally looking for an 8/10 or more)
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899.. "How does this goal align with your values?"
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900.. "Is this goal in line with the overall vision you have for your life? What's your gut-feel about that?"
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911.. "What's REALLY important to you in life - will this goal help you achieve more of that?"
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922.. "Are the goals something YOU truly want, or are they something you think you SHOULD have or SHOULD be doing?" (If it's a SHOULD, explore whose goal or dream it is)
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933.. "When you think about your goal what do you feel?" (Eg. If it gives them a sense of deep
contentment, 'rightness' and/or excitement these are good signs that it's a healthy goal) One great way to check congruency is for the client to 'experience' completion of the goal and see how they feel and if they still want it.
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944.. "Describe what completing your goal/s will look like in your life?"
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955.. "Suppose for a moment that you have your goal, what is it like? What do you feel? What are you seeing, hearing and saying to yourself?
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966.. "What will this goal/outcome allow you to do?" Then, "What will that be like?"
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977.. "What is different about your life once your goal has been achieved?"
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988.. "What would be the biggest impact from achieving your goal(s)?"
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999.. "Imagine how you will handle each day when your goal is completed?"
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10000.. "What might you be saying to yourself when your goal is completed?"
1
10011.. "Tell me a situation where completing your goal will be useful?"
1
10022.. "Tell me in what other situations and contexts achieving your goal would be helpful?"
(Make a list)
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10033.. "Imagine a situation where what you want has occurred. What would other people notice about you?"
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10044.. "What other areas of your life might be affected by this change?"
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10055.. "Where does this goal fit with your priorities and current lifestyle?"
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10066.. "What is the price of making this change?" Then, "Are you willing to pay the price?"
1
10077.. "How might your life be better with this new goal?"
1
10088.. "How might your life be worse with this new goal?"
1
10099.. "Can you complete this goal on your own, or do you need help from others?"
Then, if necessary, "What needs to change so that you can achieve this goal on your own?" R
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11100.. "How will taking action towards this goal impact other people in your life?"
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11111.. "Who else could be affected if you achieve this goal?" Then, "What if their response is not what you expect?"
1
11122.. "How does what others think and feel affect how YOU feel about your goal?"
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11133.. "Who might be upset if you achieved this goal?"
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SMMAARRTTGGooaallss are:
SSppeecciiffiicc--the more specific you are the easier your goal is to achieve MMeeaassuurraabbllee--so you know when you have achieved it
AAccttiioonnaabbllee--success needs to be within their control eg. Winning the lottery is not a "SMART" goal RReeaalliissttiicc--goals need to be both challenging to inspire AND realistic to set yourself up for success TTiimmee--BBoouunndd-- has a deadline
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11144.. "Can you give me your goal in one sentence?"
1
11155.. "How could you make this goal clearer and more measurable?"
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11166.. "Exactly what do you want to achieve from this goal?"
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11177.. "Specifically, how will you know you have achieved your goal?"
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11188.. "Is achieving this goal entirely under your own control?"
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11199.. "How will you know when you reach your goal?"
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12200.. "How will you know when to celebrate your success?"
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12211.. "By when would you want that to be the case?"
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12222.. "How could break down the overall goal into more manageable sub-goals?"
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12233.. "What would be the MINIMUM/Super-Easy level of goal to achieve?"
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12244.. "What would be your TARGET/Ideal level of goal to achieve?"
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12255.. "What would be your EXTRAORDINARY level of goal to achieve?"
1
12266.. "What timeframe are you looking to work with?"
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12277.. "What will you be doing differently that tells you you've completed your goal?"
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When a client feels stuck, they still have a goal - to get unstuck, make a decision or a change.
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12299.. "How important is ________ to you really?"
1
13300.. "What's the pay-off for being stuck?"
1
13311.. "What if you LOWERED your expectations and got moving that way?"
1
13322.. "How's that working for you? (from the wonderful Carol Pressnall Leek)
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13333.. "Who will be the 'winners' and 'losers' if you achieve your goal?" (explore how this could
be getting in the way)
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13344.. "Who are you now? Who will you need to become to complete your goal?
1
13355.. "What happens if you continue with your present behaviour?"
1
13366.. "What do you get out of having this difficulty?"
1
13377.. "What are you avoiding?"
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13388.. "What do you gain from staying stuck?" (There must be a 'benefit' or they wouldn't be stuck!)
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13399.. "If you secretly knew what was holding you back, what would it be?"
1
14400.. "What are you not seeing or acknowledging?"
1
14411.. "What do you NOT want me to ask you?"
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14422.. "Imagine for a moment that your issue is resolved. How did you get there?"
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14433.. "So, what do you think you're SECRETLY afraid of, that's getting in the way of ________?"
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14444.. "What do you think you're afraid of, that's getting in the way of living the life you want?"
1
14455.. "What are you ready to change?"
Then, "What are you NOT ready to change YET?"
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14466.. What would you suggest I ask you to move this forwards?
1
14477.. "What haven't you admitted out loud yet?"
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14488.. "What's the problem in a nutshell?"
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14499.. "Now, what's the problem in one sentence?"
1
15500.. "And what's the problem in one word?"
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15511.. "How important is this to you REALLY?"
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15522.. "What would YOU suggest I ask you to move this forwards?"
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15533.. "What EXCITES and INSPIRES you?" (Make a list)
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15544.. "What are you TOLERATING and Putting up with?" (Make a list)
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15555.. "Imagine for a moment that your issue is resolved. How did you get there?"
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15566.. "What could make a difference?"
Then, "What would make a difference?"
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15577.. "If, overnight a miracle happened and you got unstuck, who would you be?"
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15588.. "What research could you do to help you find the first step?
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15599.. "Who could you talk to who would illuminate this issue?"
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16611.. "What will you think about this 1 month, 1 year, 10 years from now?"
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16622.. "What would you do if you didn't have to live with the consequences?"
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16633.. "Name someone who has done what you want to do. What would ________ do if they were in your position?"
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16644.. "So which choice do you like best?"
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16655.. "So which choice do you like least?"
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16666.. "What's the EASY way forward here?"
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16677.. "Which choice or decision are you avoiding?"
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16688.. "Which decision is the cheapest?"
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16699.. "Which decision would be the quickest to complete?"
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17700.. "Which decision moves you closest to your life goals?"
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17711.. "What would happen if you didn't make that choice?"
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17722.. "Would you still make that decision if you won the lottery?"
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17733.. "How will this decision affect others in your life?"
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17744.. "Which decision might surprise you?"
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17755.. "What do you gain by making that decision?"
Then, "What will you lose by making that decision?"
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17766.. "How do you feel in your body about that option? What is your body telling you? "
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17777.. "What could you do as the very first step towards meeting your goal?"
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17788.. "What could you STOP doing? Do LESS of? Do MORE of? CONTINUE doing? START doing?" (Make a list) You may also like: *Free* Action Brainstorming Coaching Worksheet 1
17799.. "Have you ever done this or something similar before?" Then, "What did you do last time?"
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18800.. "Do you personally know anyone who already has your goal?" Then, "What could you learn from them?"
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18811.. "If you had a choice, what could you do?"
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18822.. "What hasn't worked yet?"
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18833.. "Let's imagine it's a year from now and you've accomplished your goal. What steps have you taken to achieve it?"
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18844.. "What are all the crazy and wacky things you could do to meet your goal?"
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18855.. "Suppose, just for a moment, you live in a world where fear and anxiety do not exist. What could you do now?"
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18877.. "Let's imagine you're really excited about this. What would you do?"
1
18888.. "If you were at your best, what would you do right now?"
1
18899.. "If you (secretly) knew what you had to do, what would it be?"
1
19900.. "What if you were an expert in the area of your goal? What would you advise yourself to do?"
1
19911.. "What would you do if you knew you couldn't fail?"
1
19922.. "What could you do if you didn't care what other people thought?"
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19933.. "Imagine you had all the time you needed what would you do?"
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19944.. "Imagine you're fully confident in your abilities, what could you do?"
1
19955.. "Imagine you're fully confident that others will support you. Now what could you do?"
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19966.. "Imagine having a chat with the wisest person you can think of (whether you know them or not). What would they tell you to do?"
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19977.. "What if money were not an issue?"
1
19988.. "If there was no 'history' or 'politics' to this what could you do?"
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19999.. "If you were rich beyond your wildest dreams how would you approach things differently?"
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20000.. "What would you do if you didn't have to live with the consequences?"
2
20011.. "What would you advise your best friend to do if they were in your situation?"
2
20022.. "What would your best friend advise you to do?"
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20033.. "What would you advise your son/daughter/child to do in this situation?"
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20044.. "What is an impossible option?"
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20055.. "From where you are now, what would be a first step that you could feel good about?"
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20066.. "Think of someone successful you admire. What would they do next?"
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20077.. "If I were to snap my fingers and you knew what you needed to do?" (snap your fingers)
2
20088.. "What do you need to do before you do anything else?"
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20099.. "So, if that seems a bit of a stretch from where you are now, give me a couple of stepping stones along the way?"
2
21100.. "What are you NOT ready to do just yet?" Then, "What could you do in the meantime?"
2
21111.. "What MUST you do going forwards?"
2
21122.. "What one small step could you take to move forwards?"
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21133.. "Which action leaps out at you?"
2
21144.. "Which action grabs you'?"
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21155.. "Which action is calling you?"
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21166.. "What's an action you could take straight after this phone call/session?"
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21177.. "What can you do today?"
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21188.. "What will you do in the next 24 hours?"
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21199.. "Which action/s can you see yourself taking this week?"
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22200.. "What are three actions you could take that would make sense this month?"
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22222.. "Do you really want to complete this action? How much? Give it a score out of 10."
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22233.. "What would stop you from doing that? What could go wrong?"
2
22244.. "What is the most challenging part of this for you?"
2
22255.. "If you were going to sabotage yourself, how would you do it?"
2
22266.. "If you secretly knew what might get in the way, what would it be?"
2
22277.. "What's good about your CURRENT situation?" (In other words, what's the benefit to staying
as they are?) Then, "How can you keep those good aspects while STILL making this change?"
2
22288.. "How might you get yourself off track?"
2
22299.. "What obstacles do you expect to meet?"
2
23300.. "What if something comes up this week, then what?" Then, "And if that doesn't work, what will you do?"
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23311.. "What other problems might there be?", "And what else?", "And what else?"
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23322.. "What's your FAVOURITE way of sabotaging yourself?"
2
23333.. "What is standing in the way of you achieving the success you want?"
2
23344.. "What 3 things could you do to support yourself and make sure this gets done?"
2
23355.. "What might you have to give up or stop doing to achieve this goal?"
2
23366.. "What's the price of making this change – and are you willing to pay it?"
2
23377.. "If there was something important around achieving this goal (to help you succeed, or that could get in the way) that you haven't mentioned yet, what would it be?"
2
23388.. "What stops you from doing more towards your goal?"
2
23399.. "In a nutshell, what's got in the way?"
2
24400.. "What is holding you back from this goal?"
2
24411.. "If you secretly didn't want to achieve your goal, what would you do?"
2
24422.. "What is your back up plan?"
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24433.. "How did you prevent yourself from completing your action?"
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24444.. "What did you choose to do instead of your action?"
Then, "How did that benefit you?" And, "Looking back, would you make the same choice again?"
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24455.. "What did you achieve instead of doing your action?"
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24466.. "What was your competing priority?" (from the awesome Judy Frabotta)
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24477.. "If the same obstacle came up again, what would you do?"
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24488.. "What can you learn from this?"
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24499.. "What's underneath that is not being said?"
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25500.. "What REALLY stopped you from completing your action here?" You may also like
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225511.. "What resources will you need to achieve your goal?"
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25522.. "Who are you now? Who do you need to be?"
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25533.. "Who could you ask for help in achieving your goal?"
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25544.. "Who should you be hanging out with so that achieving your goals becomes natural?"
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25555.. "Who else has achieved your goal?"
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25566.. "What resources do you already have to achieve this goal?"
2
25577.. "What could move you towards your goal right now?"
2
25588.. "What would happen if we doubled your self-belief?"
2
25599.. "What skills and resources do you already have?"
2
26600.. "What skills and resources do you need to develop?"
2
26611.. "What keeps you going?"
2
26622.. "Where are you the solution?"
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26633.. "What are some useful qualities that would move you towards that goal?"
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26644.. "Perhaps remember a time when you did something similar to this goal. How did you accomplish that? What resources could you bring to the present time?"
2
26655.. "Who could you tell about your goal that would support you in achieving it?"
2
26666.. "What resources do you already have (eg. skills, contacts, favours owed) that could move you forwards?"
2
26677.. "What research could you do to help you find the first (or next) step?"
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26688.. "What would it take for you to MAKE this happen?"
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26699.. "What would you be willing to give up to achieve your action?"
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27700.. "How could you break this down into smaller, more manageable steps?"
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27711.. "What is the PAIN for you of NOT achieving this goal?"
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27722.. "When SPECIFICALLY will you do your action/s? Tell me the day AND time."
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27733.. "On a scale of 1 to 10, how likely are you to complete each action?"
- If it's below an 8, then ask "What is stopping you from completing the action?" and make resolving this their first action.
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27744.. "How do you normally sabotage yourself - and what will you do differently this time?"
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27755.. "Tell me how you'll feel once you have completed your actions?"
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27766.. "How will you reward yourself when you complete your actions?"
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27777.. "On a scale of 1 to 10, how excited do you feel about taking these actions?"
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27788.. "Where are you stopping short?"
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27799.. "Suppose your unconscious mind could give you a signal to remember to do your action. What would that be?"
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28800.. "How will you get committed to your goal? How will you stay committed to your goal?"
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28811.. "On a scale of 1 to 10, how likely are you to complete that action?" Then, "What stops that being a 10?"
And, "What could we do to raise the score?"
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28822.. "How might you celebrate achieving your action/goal?"
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28833.. "What rewards will you give yourself along the way?"
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28844.. "How are you going to maintain momentum?"
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28855.. "What would make this more fun?"
2
28866.. "I'm just wondering how serious you are about this?"
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28877.. "WHO will you have to BE to achieve this goal?"
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28888.. "Is this goal challenging enough to be exciting for you?"
If not, "How can we up the stakes and make this more interesting?"
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28899.. "How would you like to be held accountable?"
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29900.. "How will you be able to show me you have completed your action?"
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29911.. "Are you willing to make a contract with me? What will that look like?"
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29922.. "Who needs to know to make sure this action gets done?"
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29933.. "How will I know you've completed your action/s?"
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29944.. "What actions DIDN'T you take that led to this problem/situation?"
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29955.. "Who could you ask to support you, and what do you need them to do for you?"
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29966.. "What has worked so far, and what hasn't?"
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29977.. "What did you learn from that?"
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29988.. "What else do you need in order to reach your goal?"
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29999.. "What choices do you need to make to achieve your goal?"
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30000.. "What are my 3 biggest priorities for the rest of the year?"
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30011.. "Are your goals still inspiring? What might need to change?"
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30022.. "What could you do to make sure the goals get completed easily?"
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30033.. "What are my 3 biggest priorities for the rest of the year?"
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30044.. "What could inspire me AND is reasonable! to get finished this year?"
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30055.. "What is the MOST important thing I want to complete right now?"
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30066.. "What do I need to let go of (a goal or something else) to ensure I achieve my goals?"
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B
R
R
A
A
T
T
I
I
N
N
G
G
3
30088.. "What were your biggest achievements this year?"
3
30099.. "What are you most proud of?"
3
31100.. "What have you achieved that has surprised you?"
3
31111.. "What 'smaller', less obvious things are you proud of achieving this year?"
3
31122.. "What steps have you made towards larger goals that you need to acknowledge yourself for?"
3
31133.. "What did you fail at or make a mistake on that needs recognizing? What did you learn and what are you proud of in how you handled it?"
3
31144.. "What will you do to celebrate, recognize and acknowledge your achievements?" You may also like
• Our Coaching Article: How to Celebrate Success, Energise and Inspire Your Clients!
S
S
E
E
L
L
F
F
-
-
D
D
I
I
S
S
C
C
O
O
V
V
E
E
R
R
Y
Y
I
I
d
d
e
e
n
n
t
t
i
i
f
f
y
y
i
i
n
n
g
g
S
S
t
t
r
r
e
e
n
n
g
g
t
t
h
h
s
s
The client won't always know their strengths - instead ask them questions and then explore their answers for strengths. Also, notice themes that come up regularly - these may be talents!
3
31155.. "What are three of your greatest strengths?"
3
31166.. "Tell me about some of the biggest challenges in your life? How did you overcome them?"
3
31177.. "Tell me about your first achievement?" (Encourage them to share even it seems boring
or small now – this gives pointers to early success – and strengths)
3
31188.. "What do you enjoy doing?" (We usually enjoy what we are good at!)
3
31199.. "What are most you proud of in your life?"
3
32200.. "What do you like about yourself?"
3
32211.. (Ask yourself) "What do I like about my client?" (Thanks to the talented Lizzy Rowe)
3
32222.. "What do you yearn to do?"
3
32233.. "What are some unusual skills you have?" (The word 'unusual' forces them to think
what's different about themselves so be sure to dig deeper to find underlying strength/s)
3
32244.. "What would not be like it is – had you not been part of it?" (eg. a project, event, work or
volunteer effort)
3
32255.. "What do you get complimented on most?" (If they have trouble answering, ask them to
think back to childhood, report cards, appraisals etc.)
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