The Link between Porn, Sex, Love and
The Link between Porn, Sex, Love and
Happiness
Happiness
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As males use porn because it creates a
As males use porn because it creates a feeling feeling of happiness. We also have to know all of happiness. We also have to know all the ‘baggage’ that comes with porn use, the baggage that actuall
the ‘baggage’ that comes with porn use, the baggage that actuall y holds you back fromy holds you back from being a ‘complete’ man.
being a ‘complete’ man. As humans we As humans we are after connections that satisfy our nare after connections that satisfy our need foreed for human intimacy
human intimacy – – this makes us happy, this makes us happy, real real happy. This happiness lasts a long time and happy. This happiness lasts a long time and makes those around us happy.
makes those around us happy. ‘Porn Happy‘Porn Happy’ is the opposite. Happiness from porn can’ is the opposite. Happiness from porn can keep you locked in Boy
keep you locked in Boyhood when youhood when your true journey is Manhood. r true journey is Manhood. I learned theseI learned these lessons the hard way;
lessons the hard way; 1.
1. The problem is porn isn’t real.The problem is porn isn’t real. Even short porn videos take hours, sometimesEven short porn videos take hours, sometimes days to film. I love long-lasting, multi-orgasmic sex wit
days to film. I love long-lasting, multi-orgasmic sex wit h my partner, so I canh my partner, so I can tell you that the positions that these guys have sex in a
tell you that the positions that these guys have sex in a re purely for the camerare purely for the camera and the viewer. Real sex is SLOW and DEEP. Porn is fast and shallow. Real sex and the viewer. Real sex is SLOW and DEEP. Porn is fast and shallow. Real sex is CLOSE and SENSUAL. Porn is stiff, mechanical and without connection. Not is CLOSE and SENSUAL. Porn is stiff, mechanical and without connection. Not to mention they are actors.
to mention they are actors. 2.
2. Men replace a real need for human love Men replace a real need for human love and connection with a fake one.and connection with a fake one. I I was addicted to porn for years. I loved it during at t
was addicted to porn for years. I loved it during at the time though. Of course Ihe time though. Of course I did; when you are young and inexperienced porn satisfies all your insecurities did; when you are young and inexperienced porn satisfies all your insecurities and curiosities surrounding sex and the female sexual anatomy.
and curiosities surrounding sex and the female sexual anatomy. I get it. I get it. I I suffered from chronic premature ejacul
suffered from chronic premature ejaculation for 14 years. I couldn’t haveation for 14 years. I couldn’t have satisfying, intimate sex with girls so
satisfying, intimate sex with girls so I went online to satisfy my sexual desires.I went online to satisfy my sexual desires. The danger is that you get used to using porn to satisfy a real
The danger is that you get used to using porn to satisfy a real need that youneed that you aren’t getting in real life.
aren’t getting in real life. The issue causing that real need could be;The issue causing that real need could be;
You are single and not getting any sex/are a virgin.You are single and not getting any sex/are a virgin.
You are in a relationship but not getting any sex/suffer premature You are in a relationship but not getting any sex/suffer premature ejaculation.ejaculation.
You are single, lucky enough to be getting casual sex but not intimateYou are single, lucky enough to be getting casual sex but not intimate
connection. connection.
You are in a relationship, having sex but without the intimate You are in a relationship, having sex but without the intimate connection.connection.
You are having sex but crave the intimate, non-sexual connection of someoneYou are having sex but crave the intimate, non-sexual connection of someone
else (perhaps you crave the love, connection or acceptance of a
else (perhaps you crave the love, connection or acceptance of a parent).parent). Guess what? These needs will not disappear. Eventuall
Guess what? These needs will not disappear. Eventuall y you’y you’ll have to take 100%ll have to take 100% responsibility, find the courage of Manhood and work on addressing this need. Get responsibility, find the courage of Manhood and work on addressing this need. Get creative. Put your mind to it. For as long as
creative. Put your mind to it. For as long as you watch porn and ignore your REALyou watch porn and ignore your REAL NEEDS the worse the problem gets. Fact: Yo
NEEDS the worse the problem gets. Fact: You cannot avoid it forever. You need thisu cannot avoid it forever. You need this real need to make you HAPPY. When I worked this out I finally had the focus to heal real need to make you HAPPY. When I worked this out I finally had the focus to heal myself naturally of my chronic premature ejaculation problem.
3. Porn drains your vital male energy or ‘Jing’.
3. Porn drains your vital male energy or ‘Jing’. For two thousand years the Taoists For two thousand years the Taoists still believe that sex is more than just physical and emotional intimacy. Sex falls into the still believe that sex is more than just physical and emotional intimacy. Sex falls into the sacred realm of spiritual
sacred realm of spiritual practice. During sex couples share tpractice. During sex couples share their ‘essence’ or Jing. Theheir ‘essence’ or Jing. The sharing of essences allows couples to harmonise, cultivate and circulate sexual energy. sharing of essences allows couples to harmonise, cultivate and circulate sexual energy. Consider the genetic potential of your ‘come’ after
Consider the genetic potential of your ‘come’ after orgasming to porn;orgasming to porn;
Each one of these sperm ejaculate could conceivablEach one of these sperm ejaculate could conceivably become a human if it hady become a human if it had
equal measure of female eggs to fertilise before they died. equal measure of female eggs to fertilise before they died.
If each sperm cell could fertilise a If each sperm cell could fertilise a female egg YOU could co-create a humanfemale egg YOU could co-create a human
life force equivalent to the population of the United States in
life force equivalent to the population of the United States in one singleone single ejaculation!
ejaculation!
The immediate renewal of sperm requires the body to draw from energy sources, The immediate renewal of sperm requires the body to draw from energy sources, draining our jing in the pr
draining our jing in the process. Using pornography to orgasm will ocess. Using pornography to orgasm will contribute to youcontribute to you feeling less powerful, decisive and alert.
feeling less powerful, decisive and alert. Overtime the drain on your energy sources willOvertime the drain on your energy sources will lead to ongoing ailments and stop you being a legend, a warrior and True Man in real lead to ongoing ailments and stop you being a legend, a warrior and True Man in real life.
life. 4.
4. Porn stops great sex.Porn stops great sex. Watching porn on any device involves using your eyes toWatching porn on any device involves using your eyes to feed the brain which makes us feel ‘happy’ (
feed the brain which makes us feel ‘happy’ (it’s just a stimulated chemicalit’s just a stimulated chemical reaction though
reaction though). When I have multi-orgasmic sex with my partner I r). When I have multi-orgasmic sex with my partner I rarely openarely open my eyes. Because when using porn, the only sense of
my eyes. Because when using porn, the only sense of touchtouch is your own hand on is your own hand on your penis, while you continually reinforce the need for visual stimulation.
your penis, while you continually reinforce the need for visual stimulation. When the time comes for you to PERFORM FOR REAL you are all at sorts. When the time comes for you to PERFORM FOR REAL you are all at sorts. You don’t connect and satisfy your partner because you forgot to nurture and You don’t connect and satisfy your partner because you forgot to nurture and focus your;
focus your;
Sense of touchSense of touch – – to stimulate every skin cell on her body with the caress of your to stimulate every skin cell on her body with the caress of your
hand (plus you are more likely to ejaculate prematurel
hand (plus you are more likely to ejaculate prematurely as you will becomey as you will become over-aroused due to all your sense of touch being overloaded).
over-aroused due to all your sense of touch being overloaded).
BreathBreath – – by focussing and connecting on by focussing and connecting on your slow inhalation and exhalationyour slow inhalation and exhalation
you can control your arousal and give you and your partner multiple orgasms. you can control your arousal and give you and your partner multiple orgasms. If you are wandering why you have lots of sexual partners but can’t make a If you are wandering why you have lots of sexual partners but can’t make a relationship last try having more genuine and fulfilling sex the FIRST time
relationship last try having more genuine and fulfilling sex the FIRST time (hint:(hint: If you build up
If you build up intimacy over half a dozen dates, your first sexual intimacy over half a dozen dates, your first sexual intimacy withintimacy with each other will be a
each other will be a
million
million
times better). times better). 5.5. Porn lets you believe you are in Porn lets you believe you are in control.control. I could write my second book on this.I could write my second book on this. If there is anything in life that s
If there is anything in life that sets us up for pain and failure it’s ets us up for pain and failure it’s having ahaving a perceived sense of control.
perceived sense of control. I sayI say perceived perceived because all form of control is in the because all form of control is in the eye of the beholder.
eye of the beholder. It’s your perception even though in reality the control isIt’s your perception even though in reality the control is probably all in your head!
probably all in your head! That’s why school children mess up and civiliansThat’s why school children mess up and civilians overthrow their dictator.
overthrow their dictator. Accessing porn onAccessing porn online puts you in line puts you in control of every control of every lastlast detail.
detail. Multiple tabs in youMultiple tabs in your browser get you r browser get you to choose the perfect moto choose the perfect model,del, vagina, setting, duration, orgasm.
vagina, setting, duration, orgasm.
Never forget that the essence to life is surrendering to the moment. In real sex Never forget that the essence to life is surrendering to the moment. In real sex
you surrender to your partner’s br
you surrender to your partner’s br eath that slowly increases and decreases as youeath that slowly increases and decreases as you change positions and level of arousal. In real sex
you respect your partner
you respect your partner and nurture her arousal, youand nurture her arousal, you serve her. You put her serve her. You put her sexual needs first.
sexual needs first. Make her feel safe, loved and protected.Make her feel safe, loved and protected. You surrender toYou surrender to these signals and
these signals and act upon thact upon them moment by em moment by moment. moment. There is nThere is no rush. o rush. ThenThen you both have AMAZING sex.
you both have AMAZING sex. 6.
6. Porn changes your brain.Porn changes your brain. I could write my third I could write my third book on this. If you introducebook on this. If you introduce a new belief to the brain
a new belief to the brain with emotionwith emotion every day for 30 days it creates a newevery day for 30 days it creates a new neural pathway in the brain. This is called
neural pathway in the brain. This is called neuroplasticityneuroplasticity. . Furthermore, Furthermore, if yif youou continue this positive reinforcement for 90 days it becomes
continue this positive reinforcement for 90 days it becomes your primaryyour primary behaviour or though
behaviour or thought pattern. t pattern. This is an awesome opportunity forThis is an awesome opportunity for good habits good habits (it’s how I cured my premature ejaculation problem) but a
(it’s how I cured my premature ejaculation problem) but a real pain forreal pain for negativenegative habits
habits (it’s how I got hooked to (it’s how I got hooked to pornography).pornography).
Every time you view porn, messages are sent to the brain which rele
Every time you view porn, messages are sent to the brain which rele ase a group ofase a group of pleasant sex hormones and endorphins. We get a g
pleasant sex hormones and endorphins. We get a good feeling from this rush. ood feeling from this rush. AfterAfter continued use of porn, the hypothalamus (the part of the brain responsible for
continued use of porn, the hypothalamus (the part of the brain responsible for
monitoring and regulating the balance of the brain) padlocks feelings of arousal with monitoring and regulating the balance of the brain) padlocks feelings of arousal with pornography use.
pornography use. This binding relationship becomes even more tightly locked This binding relationship becomes even more tightly locked the morethe more you repeat the experience.
you repeat the experience. So after 30 daySo after 30 days you are in s you are in the danger zone of the danger zone of creatingcreating change in your brain.
change in your brain.
The stress and strain of daily life disrupts our internal balance and it is the job of the The stress and strain of daily life disrupts our internal balance and it is the job of the hypothalamus to recall the substance (nicotine, alcohol, sex) to restore balance.
hypothalamus to recall the substance (nicotine, alcohol, sex) to restore balance. That’sThat’s why after a hangover, or when tired or after a long
why after a hangover, or when tired or after a long day I felt like reaching out today I felt like reaching out to pornography to p
pornography to prop me up again. rop me up again. The strength of my hypoThe strength of my hypothalamus frequentlythalamus frequently overpowered my willpower.
overpowered my willpower. The hypothalamus will work very The hypothalamus will work very hard to get you to givehard to get you to give it the desired substance and so
it the desired substance and so your experience quickly becomes a habit and over a fewyour experience quickly becomes a habit and over a few months an addiction.
months an addiction. 7.
7. Porn willPorn will
keep
keep
you single. you single.See number 4.See number 4. 8.8. Porn willPorn will
make
make
you single. you single. You say: ‘My partner knows I watch pornYou say: ‘My partner knows I watch porn occasionally’ …I say: one day she will work something out.occasionally’ …I say: one day she will work something out. Instead of thinking;Instead of thinking; “Joey watches pornography, I know lots of guys do, so I guess that makes it ok, even “Joey watches pornography, I know lots of guys do, so I guess that makes it ok, even though I don’t like the thought of it”
though I don’t like the thought of it”
She will eventually (and that day will come) be in
She will eventually (and that day will come) be in enough pain to find the courage toenough pain to find the courage to say;
say;
“Joey is still watching porn, it’s not ok and I don’t have to put up with it”.
“Joey is still watching porn, it’s not ok and I don’t have to put up with it”. Then thereThen there will be pain.
will be pain. She may leave you. Either way, yShe may leave you. Either way, your goal to use porn to make your goal to use porn to make you happyou happy will not help overcome the pain of what is to come.
will not help overcome the pain of what is to come. I know. It happened to me.I know. It happened to me. This post is not a bashing on the morals of pornography.
This post is not a bashing on the morals of pornography. I’m not religious. I don’t thinkI’m not religious. I don’t think you are a sinner for having viewed/ing porn, nor was I for all those
you are a sinner for having viewed/ing porn, nor was I for all those years… but I’myears… but I’m sorry this blog title was incorrect, there is no link between happiness and porn. sorry this blog title was incorrect, there is no link between happiness and porn. Sex, love and h
Sex, love and happiness are totally real and coappiness are totally real and completely unscripted. mpletely unscripted. Porn is totally un-Porn is totally un-real and completely scripted.
real and completely scripted.
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o--Basics #2 Premature
Basics #2 Premature
Ejaculation
Ejaculation
I owe all my recent personal growth to the 14
I owe all my recent personal growth to the 14 years of pain and shame of my chronicyears of pain and shame of my chronic premature ejaculation problem. I get to say that
premature ejaculation problem. I get to say that nownow, because I fought harder than I ever, because I fought harder than I ever fought for anything in my life to beat it. Before that I all
fought for anything in my life to beat it. Before that I all owed my premature ejaculationowed my premature ejaculation problem to completely break me, my relationships and finally a
problem to completely break me, my relationships and finally a marriage. But out of themarriage. But out of the darkness comes the light.
darkness comes the light.
Taking ownership of premature ejaculation is the end of the painful journey. Only good Taking ownership of premature ejaculation is the end of the painful journey. Only good things can follow. You just have to be ready to commit to overcoming it on your own. things can follow. You just have to be ready to commit to overcoming it on your own.
Hiding behind quick-fix premature ejaculation cures
Hiding behind quick-fix premature ejaculation cures
I spent 14 years suffering premature ejaculation. Not once during that ti
I spent 14 years suffering premature ejaculation. Not once during that ti me did I takeme did I take ownership
ownership of of the the problem. problem. Sure Sure I I tried:tried:
Considering it was a geneticConsidering it was a genetic disposition. Perhaps it wasn’t my fault, had Idisposition. Perhaps it wasn’t my fault, had I
inherited this problem? inherited this problem?
Believing I would one day grow out of itBelieving I would one day grow out of it
Blaming my partner for not Blaming my partner for not going slow enough during sexgoing slow enough during sex
Blaming my partner for not having enough sex to overcome PEBlaming my partner for not having enough sex to overcome PE
Wasting time halfheartedly experimenting with quick fixes Wasting time halfheartedly experimenting with quick fixes I had researchedI had researched
online. online.
Whilst these activities dis
Whilst these activities distracted me and gave me some perception of control itracted me and gave me some perception of control in over an over a decade of despair, all of them sought to REMOVE blame and responsibility from ME. decade of despair, all of them sought to REMOVE blame and responsibility from ME. The flawed message I was telling myself was
The flawed message I was telling myself was “Your premature ejaculation is
“Your premature ejaculation is
not
not
your problem, you are just a your problem, you are just avictim
victim
to some to some undiagnosed circumstance, you just haven’t work out what is causing it yet”. undiagnosed circumstance, you just haven’t work out what is causing it yet”. This message allowed me to cowardly carry on living in the pain of premature This message allowed me to cowardly carry on living in the pain of premature ejaculation because deep down it was easier. Easier than feeling the discomfort of ejaculation because deep down it was easier. Easier than feeling the discomfort of change and the fear of the unknown. Despite my pain, I was not man-enough to change and the fear of the unknown. Despite my pain, I was not man-enough to summons the courage and determination needed to confront my fears.summons the courage and determination needed to confront my fears. So I continued to throw myself into a list of faile
So I continued to throw myself into a list of failed quick-fix experiences such as:d quick-fix experiences such as:
Nasal spray (this is another blog post) Nasal spray (this is another blog post)
Stop-start method during sexStop-start method during sex
Bathing my penis in hot/cold water prior to sexBathing my penis in hot/cold water prior to sex
Trying to masturbate for longerTrying to masturbate for longer
Viewing lots of porn to increase my arousal thresholdViewing lots of porn to increase my arousal threshold
Ejaculating before sexEjaculating before sex
Trying to get an erection and resume sex again aftTrying to get an erection and resume sex again after orgasming prematurelyer orgasming prematurely
Wearing two condomsWearing two condoms
Quick-Quick-fixes don’t work. Save yourself the hassle. They just keep you distracted fixes don’t work. Save yourself the hassle. They just keep you distracted andand allow you to hide a little bit longer.
allow you to hide a little bit longer. Hiding from the moment when you are Hiding from the moment when you are finally infinally in enough pain to find the courage to say;
enough pain to find the courage to say;
““ Premature ejaculation is Premature ejaculation is
my pr
my proble
oblem
m
, created and controlled by me. Th , created and controlled by me. The only persone only person who can fix it iswho can fix it is
m
me
e
.”.”Taking Ownership of Your Life
Taking Ownership of Your Life
When you realise that only YOU have the answer, something amazing happens within. When you realise that only YOU have the answer, something amazing happens within. A warrior spirit begins to emerge. In the s
A warrior spirit begins to emerge. In the search for answers you dig deep into yourearch for answers you dig deep into your inner-self and shed light on your own issues that have contributed to your premature inner-self and shed light on your own issues that have contributed to your premature ejaculation problem. It has to start wit
ejaculation problem. It has to start with this. This examination is a journey of personalh this. This examination is a journey of personal discovery that doesn’t involve touching
discovery that doesn’t involve touching your penis or thinking about syour penis or thinking about s ex.ex.
It is a personal journey to create some freedom from your current situation of premature It is a personal journey to create some freedom from your current situation of premature ejaculation. It is giving yourself unbridled permission to let
ejaculation. It is giving yourself unbridled permission to let your creativity flow as youyour creativity flow as you literally
literally clean out your closets, spring clean your living space and tak clean out your closets, spring clean your living space and tak e ownership ofe ownership of every square inch of
every square inch of the kingdom you purvey.the kingdom you purvey.
Let the creativity guide you, go on a walk, draw a picture on scrap paper, c
Let the creativity guide you, go on a walk, draw a picture on scrap paper, c olour in aolour in a mandala off the internet, paint your outside steps or bench, carve a
mandala off the internet, paint your outside steps or bench, carve a smiley face into asmiley face into a piece of driftwood or learn to play the uku
piece of driftwood or learn to play the ukulele (it takes 5 minutes to learn a simplelele (it takes 5 minutes to learn a simple tune). It doesn’t matter what you do but do something different that nurtures
tune). It doesn’t matter what you do but do something different that nurtures your soul.your soul. Something that buys your head and heart some space and freedom.
Something that buys your head and heart some space and freedom. This attitude to attending to the
This attitude to attending to the external external and tangible is vital practise and tangible is vital practise to get you in theto get you in the rhythm of attending the things you own. This is the act of
rhythm of attending the things you own. This is the act of taking taking ownership.ownership.
Taking ownership of Yourself
Taking ownership of Yourself
Then shift the practice of attending to and nurturing the things
Then shift the practice of attending to and nurturing the things youyou ownown to attending to to attending to and nurturing
and nurturing yourself yourself , the internal, the, the internal, the innerself innerself . The innerself is all of . The innerself is all of your ideas,your ideas, thoughts, feelings and memories that you keep locked inside because a long time ago thoughts, feelings and memories that you keep locked inside because a long time ago you experienced shame sharing them in the outside world. Have faith and start living you experienced shame sharing them in the outside world. Have faith and start living how you really think and feel.
how you really think and feel.
Through space, creativity and freedom the innerself will emerge. Use a journal to write Through space, creativity and freedom the innerself will emerge. Use a journal to write down the things that arise. They may not be right, reasonable or make any sense
down the things that arise. They may not be right, reasonable or make any sense but itbut it doesn’t matter, you may not ever read them again. J
doesn’t matter, you may not ever read them again. Justust like you cleaned your physicallike you cleaned your physical kingdom, now is the time to
kingdom, now is the time to clean your metaphysical kingdom, the things tclean your metaphysical kingdom, the things that youhat you thought existed within you but can’t be seen.
thought existed within you but can’t be seen.
Being in complete control of your erection has to
Being in complete control of your erection has to be
be
earned
earned
back
back
After you have taken control of your physical and inner kingdom, your innerself will be After you have taken control of your physical and inner kingdom, your innerself will be closer to the surface than
determination and humility to just get to this point. Not many people do.
determination and humility to just get to this point. Not many people do. But withoutBut without these qualities you cannot overcome premature ejaculation. How can
these qualities you cannot overcome premature ejaculation. How can you?you?
How can you be a man in complete control of his erection without strength ofHow can you be a man in complete control of his erection without strength of
mind? mind?
How can you avoid the pitfalls oHow can you avoid the pitfalls of f over-consumption of over-consumption of pornographypornography without thewithout the
determination to seek love and connection at a deeper and fulfilling level? determination to seek love and connection at a deeper and fulfilling level?
How can you make long-lasting, passionate sex/love to your sexual partnerHow can you make long-lasting, passionate sex/love to your sexual partner
without the courage to surrender to the moment? without the courage to surrender to the moment?
Without humility how do you expect her to feel safe enough to be a completeWithout humility how do you expect her to feel safe enough to be a complete
women in your arms? women in your arms? The good news is you
The good news is you don’t have to go out and find don’t have to go out and find these qualities. You were bornthese qualities. You were born with them and they are inside
with them and they are inside you right now waiting to you right now waiting to be untapped. The qualitiesbe untapped. The qualities growing within you are the qualities of
growing within you are the qualities of a Warrior in the making, a Warrior whoa Warrior in the making, a Warrior who can control his ejaculation and
can control his ejaculation and nurture passionate love with a nurture passionate love with a partner.partner. Thanks for reading! Please email me ANY comments or questions
Thanks for reading! Please email me ANY comments or questions – – I love to hear from I love to hear from my readers. Email me to subscribe for further
my readers. Email me to subscribe for further updates on my book, Going The Distance.updates on my book, Going The Distance. Guy.
Guy.
Next post; Back to Basics #3: The Warrior Blueprint. Next post; Back to Basics #3: The Warrior Blueprint.
If you master this, you grow in self-esteem
If you master this, you grow in self-esteem and add value to your relationship with theand add value to your relationship with the world. Sounds profound, but everything in life comes
world. Sounds profound, but everything in life comes back to the individualback to the individual – – you. So you. So with YOU it must start. If
with YOU it must start. If you don’t master this you lose.you don’t master this you lose. You wYou will have ill have decided todecided to give all your power away to everything and everyone else. Luckily for you, you get to give all your power away to everything and everyone else. Luckily for you, you get to choose.
choose.
We own the wrong stuff.
We own the wrong stuff.
Owning ‘stuff’ is a high priority is modern life. The need to have
Owning ‘stuff’ is a high priority is modern life. The need to have a girlfriend, wife, sex,a girlfriend, wife, sex, own a home, nice car, nice clothes or the
own a home, nice car, nice clothes or the latest phone is a compelling one. This needlatest phone is a compelling one. This need motivates all of us to do what it takes to meet these needs (e.g. stay in a job that doesn’t motivates all of us to do what it takes to meet these needs (e.g. stay in a job that doesn’t serve you or your family, buy cheaper items of food where there are other
serve you or your family, buy cheaper items of food where there are other wise healthierwise healthier alternatives or compromise your values to impress s
alternatives or compromise your values to impress someone).omeone).
But how much time do you, we, I, put into owning ourselves? Do we recognise the need But how much time do you, we, I, put into owning ourselves? Do we recognise the need to own our health, finances, self-esteem, relationships, prejudices, beliefs and values? to own our health, finances, self-esteem, relationships, prejudices, beliefs and values? If we don’t recognise the compelling need to
If we don’t recognise the compelling need to address these facets of ‘self’ then thereaddress these facets of ‘self’ then there will be no motivation
will be no motivation to improve upon them.to improve upon them.
For many, it’s easier to buy something tangible to address a
For many, it’s easier to buy something tangible to address a ‘need’ than to work a bit‘need’ than to work a bit harder and look in the mirror and address that need from within.
harder and look in the mirror and address that need from within.
How much ownership is enough?
How much ownership is enough?
Ownership of self simply m
Ownership of self simply means eans taking responsibility. Ownership taking responsibility. Ownership requires standing uprequires standing up straight, looking at yourself in mirror
straight, looking at yourself in mirror – – straight into your own eyes straight into your own eyes – – and accepting that and accepting that you and only you have the power to
you and only you have the power to change anything. A surprising number change anything. A surprising number of theof the people you know o
people you know or work with do not like doing r work with do not like doing this. It’s hard and uncomfortable. It’sthis. It’s hard and uncomfortable. It’s easier to pretend that circumstances are out of your control.
easier to pretend that circumstances are out of your control.
But how can I take
But how can I take ownership of things ar
ownership of things are out of my control
e out of my control? I can’t
? I can’t
co
contr
ntrol w
ol who hi
ho hirre
es and
s and ffi i
res me! I can’t control who decides to love me! I
res me! I can’t control who decides to love me! I
can’t control colds, flu and disease!
can’t control colds, flu and disease!
Yes you can. You can take ownership of everything. Start by taking ownership of the Yes you can. You can take ownership of everything. Start by taking ownership of the fact that you always had a choice.
fact that you always had a choice. You had a choice:
You had a choice:
• about what city you chose to
• about what city you chose to live and work in.live and work in. • of what to study.
• of what to study.
• of the rent/mortgage you have to pay. • of the rent/mortgage you have to pay.
• about what time you got up this morning and what time you went to bed. • about what time you got up this morning and what time you went to bed. • what you said and did today and what you put in your mouth (people hate this • what you said and did today and what you put in your mouth (people hate this choice!).
choice!).
• to use google
• to use google to research the health and animal cto research the health and animal cruelty ramifications of everything youruelty ramifications of everything you put in your body
put in your body..
The best news is; you will always have a choice
The best news is; you will always have a choice until the day you die. This is calleduntil the day you die. This is called ownership of self. This is taking responsibility.
ownership of self. This is taking responsibility.
You have a choice of what you say to people. You can say something that is
helpful or generous. You can warn someone if they are threatening your physical or helpful or generous. You can warn someone if they are threatening your physical or emotional safety.
emotional safety.
You have a choice of how you deal with conflict; you can let conflict
You have a choice of how you deal with conflict; you can let conflict consume your lifeconsume your life until one die you are so uneasy with conflict that
until one die you are so uneasy with conflict that you get dis-ease. Or you can deal withyou get dis-ease. Or you can deal with conflict efficiently and effectivel
conflict efficiently and effectively by taking ownership of the role you played in they by taking ownership of the role you played in the conflict and talking to that person about it. You have the choice to resolve the problem conflict and talking to that person about it. You have the choice to resolve the problem or walk away. You have the choice.
or walk away. You have the choice.
This is Life!
This is Life!
Sometimes the negative choice is the eas
Sometimes the negative choice is the eas y option. Especially when you are used toy option. Especially when you are used to living this way. It’s easier
living this way. It’s easier to eat frozen chips than make your own. It’s easier to eat frozen chips than make your own. It’s easier to stay atto stay at home an
home andd watch porn instead watch porn instead of nurturing yourself with some exercise or creativity.of nurturing yourself with some exercise or creativity. But when you want to start making better choices, like owning the role
But when you want to start making better choices, like owning the role you play in youryou play in your current health and relationship situation, it c
current health and relationship situation, it can feel like the positive choice is an feel like the positive choice is too hard.too hard. This is the struggle. This is a
This is the struggle. This is a good sign! Something good will happen now.good sign! Something good will happen now. The struggle is the tension caused by thinking consciously. This is the mental st
The struggle is the tension caused by thinking consciously. This is the mental st rain ofrain of using your brain to take ownership of your life. This struggle is the esse
using your brain to take ownership of your life. This struggle is the esse nce of living.nce of living. This is life.
This is life.
Why should I take ownership of my life if its a
Why should I take ownership of my life if its a struggle? Isn’t it easier to
struggle? Isn’t it easier to
just
just go
go a
alo
long
ng w
wiitth
h e
evve
erryytthing?
hing?
It gets easier. After 30 da
It gets easier. After 30 days the decisions become much more naturalys the decisions become much more natural – – you have more you have more energy because of the better health and lifest
energy because of the better health and lifest yle choices you have made. After 90 daysyle choices you have made. After 90 days of conscious decision making your mental, physical, emotional and spiritual health will of conscious decision making your mental, physical, emotional and spiritual health will be vibrating with positive energy, the energy that makes it easier to make the righ
be vibrating with positive energy, the energy that makes it easier to make the rightt decision for you.
decision for you.
When you are making the right decisions and taking ownership of your life, those When you are making the right decisions and taking ownership of your life, those around you benefit to. Humanity benefits. You ra
around you benefit to. Humanity benefits. You radiate health, love and humanitdiate health, love and humanity.y. Because of your power to make conscious decisions and take ownership of
Because of your power to make conscious decisions and take ownership of your life youyour life you radiate a warrior spirit.
radiate a warrior spirit.
People will know you for the man who speaks his own truth. People will respect
People will know you for the man who speaks his own truth. People will respect you foryou for having the courage to stand up straight, use eye contact and express how
having the courage to stand up straight, use eye contact and express how you feel.you feel. People will want to be close to
People will want to be close to you as they know you own how yyou as they know you own how you feel, they will knowou feel, they will know you do not judge them because
you do not judge them because you have compassion and humanity. You had it you have compassion and humanity. You had it allall along. You just lost it for a while there.
along. You just lost it for a while there. That man was me.
That man was me.
Thanks for reading. I’m not the m
Thanks for reading. I’m not the master here when it comes to advice, just the student.aster here when it comes to advice, just the student. These are my musings, these are the thoughts that inspire me everyday to become a These are my musings, these are the thoughts that inspire me everyday to become a better man, partner and father.
better man, partner and father. My shift in consciousness My shift in consciousnessmade life have so much moremade life have so much more meaning for me. Please email me to comment on anything
meaning for me. Please email me to comment on anything – – this blog is nothing without this blog is nothing without a community discussion.
HappinessManhood
HappinessManhoodMasculinityMasculinity
My daily practice
My daily practice
As mentioned in Going The Distance book, over several months I undertook various As mentioned in Going The Distance book, over several months I undertook various practices gleaned from my research in order for my health to become more balanced practices gleaned from my research in order for my health to become more balanced
mentally, emotionally and physically. The reward from my commitment to these mentally, emotionally and physically. The reward from my commitment to these
practices was in becoming a sustainable, multi-orgasmic man. When I truly experienced practices was in becoming a sustainable, multi-orgasmic man. When I truly experienced
the success of my practice,
the success of my practice, I grew spiritually. As long as I believed in mI grew spiritually. As long as I believed in myself, I reallyyself, I really did believe that an
did believe that anything was possible, and through visualisation and ything was possible, and through visualisation and physically doingphysically doing the practices, I made my conscious thoughts of sustainable s
the practices, I made my conscious thoughts of sustainable s ex aex a realityreality.. The following attributes are required for any daily practice:
The following attributes are required for any daily practice:
VisionVision CommitmentCommitment PatiencePatience HumilityHumility LoveLove CourageCourage
Courage underpins all of the above characteristics. W
Courage underpins all of the above characteristics. Without courage, you are the boyithout courage, you are the boy who is waiting for permission to become a warrior. All great people who have
who is waiting for permission to become a warrior. All great people who have accomplished amazing feats have the courage to believe in a…
accomplished amazing feats have the courage to believe in a… …Vision
…Vision
It takes courage to have a visi
It takes courage to have a vision to change a situation and face the unknown or theon to change a situation and face the unknown or the unfamiliar. Sometimes it is very painful to find our courage and realise our vision. On unfamiliar. Sometimes it is very painful to find our courage and realise our vision. On the path to achieving our vision, we achieve…
the path to achieving our vision, we achieve… …Mastery
…Mastery
Without courage, we cannot achieve mastery. Mastery requires commitment to achieve Without courage, we cannot achieve mastery. Mastery requires commitment to achieve greatness and actualise our full potential.
greatness and actualise our full potential. Having the courage to work on weaknessesHaving the courage to work on weaknesses also requires…
also requires… …Patience …Patience
It takes courage to be patient, the courage to put everything into perspective, to It takes courage to be patient, the courage to put everything into perspective, to re- prioritise what needs to be done, now, to
prioritise what needs to be done, now, today, so that it can help achieve future goals.day, so that it can help achieve future goals. Patience requires faith in t
Patience requires faith in the process, like sending a letter. The journey to ultimatehe process, like sending a letter. The journey to ultimate success is a learning experience of failures and success. To navigate this tumultuous success is a learning experience of failures and success. To navigate this tumultuous path requires…
path requires… …Humility …Humility
Times will get tough in pursuit of a goal. It ta
Times will get tough in pursuit of a goal. It takes courage to accept that we are kes courage to accept that we are not innot in control of everything. The only thing we can ever control is our response to the events control of everything. The only thing we can ever control is our response to the events that arise. When the rug is pulled from under our f
that arise. When the rug is pulled from under our f eet, as occasionally happens to us all,eet, as occasionally happens to us all, remember the bigger picture. We are doing this for…
remember the bigger picture. We are doing this for… …Self
…Self -Love-Love
There is nothing courageous about chasing
There is nothing courageous about chasing something that boosts our ego. Committingsomething that boosts our ego. Committing to the daily practice should come from self-love, not measuring ourselves against to the daily practice should come from self-love, not measuring ourselves against others.
others. Courage Courage
I suffered for many years because
I suffered for many years because I feared the uncomfortable and unknown feelings thatI feared the uncomfortable and unknown feelings that needed to come with change. In the past, I was too
needed to come with change. In the past, I was too scared to feel the pain of acceptiscared to feel the pain of acceptingng that my life was in a bad wa
that my life was in a bad way. I had lost my sense of self, I was y. I had lost my sense of self, I was in a marriage that wasin a marriage that was failing and I could not sustain myself during sex. The day I decided to be
failing and I could not sustain myself during sex. The day I decided to be courageouscourageous and let go of the pain and begin taking the positive steps of m
and let go of the pain and begin taking the positive steps of m y daily practice, I began toy daily practice, I began to grow. It took courage to let everything go.
grow. It took courage to let everything go.
The daily practice
The daily practice
Timing
Timing
I made a commitment to complete my daily practi
I made a commitment to complete my daily practice in the mornings. I still do. ce in the mornings. I still do. In theIn the mornings, our body, mind and spirit are rested and energised. I preferred to have m mornings, our body, mind and spirit are rested and energised. I preferred to have m yy afternoons free for leisure activities and downtime.
afternoons free for leisure activities and downtime.
Yoga
Yoga
Yoga is not just movement. Yoga was a metaphor for my life and m
Yoga is not just movement. Yoga was a metaphor for my life and m y goal iny goal in overcoming premature ejaculation. A flexible body creates a flexi
overcoming premature ejaculation. A flexible body creates a flexi ble mind. Flexibleble mind. Flexible minds manage feelings and arousal and help strengthen self-control. Yoga brought minds manage feelings and arousal and help strengthen self-control. Yoga brought discipline to my day. The practice of yoga taught me not to rush, which I transfer
discipline to my day. The practice of yoga taught me not to rush, which I transfer red tored to sustaining at sex. Yoga taught me to breathe slowly and calmly through difficult
sustaining at sex. Yoga taught me to breathe slowly and calmly through difficult positions and to feel strong when I u
positions and to feel strong when I used my breath. I transferred my awareness of breathsed my breath. I transferred my awareness of breath to help me stay in total control of my arousal during sex. Yoga raised my awareness of to help me stay in total control of my arousal during sex. Yoga raised my awareness of my sensory nervous system. I learned to notice the
my sensory nervous system. I learned to notice the different temperatures around mydifferent temperatures around my body, areas where I was tense, areas of my body
body, areas where I was tense, areas of my body that were weak. I raised my awarenessthat were weak. I raised my awareness of emotions, touch and sound instead of relying solely on visual stimuli. This helped me of emotions, touch and sound instead of relying solely on visual stimuli. This helped me remain calm and connected to my partner and myself during sex.
remain calm and connected to my partner and myself during sex.
I stuck to just a handful of basic poses combined in one called ‘Salute to the Sun’. This I stuck to just a handful of basic poses combined in one called ‘Salute to the Sun’. This is a beginner’s routine, which I still l
is a beginner’s routine, which I still love to do each day.ove to do each day.
You can find many great videos on YouTube to suit your level of fitness and time You can find many great videos on YouTube to suit your level of fitness and time availability.
Mindfulness meditation
Mindfulness meditation
Mindfulness is just breathing and being aware of the moment. It is
Mindfulness is just breathing and being aware of the moment. It is simply connectingsimply connecting with your breath, just like yoga but without the physical movements.
with your breath, just like yoga but without the physical movements.
Mindfulness is a very important part of the daily practice. Mindfulness meditation calms Mindfulness is a very important part of the daily practice. Mindfulness meditation calms the mind. It helped me control my fears when I was preparing myself to have sex again the mind. It helped me control my fears when I was preparing myself to have sex again for the first time since
for the first time since my previous embarrassing premature orgasm episode. Not onlymy previous embarrassing premature orgasm episode. Not only did it calm the negative thoughts, it helped me hear my positive thoughts reinforcing my did it calm the negative thoughts, it helped me hear my positive thoughts reinforcing my belief that I could become a sustainable lover.
belief that I could become a sustainable lover.
Diaphragmatic breathing
Diaphragmatic breathing –
– the belly breath
the belly breath
There is a regular way to breathe
There is a regular way to breathe – – short, shallow gasps which most of us do to survive, short, shallow gasps which most of us do to survive, and then there is a better
and then there is a better way to breathe. Belly breaths interrupt the unconsciousway to breathe. Belly breaths interrupt the unconscious breathing rate and send a message to the brain that we are calm.
breathing rate and send a message to the brain that we are calm.
You can consciously treat your body to a healing experience by taking a slow deep You can consciously treat your body to a healing experience by taking a slow deep breath to a count of four and slowly
breath to a count of four and slowly release it for four counts. Do that now…release it for four counts. Do that now…
Congratulations, you have just taken a belly breath. You made a conscious decision for Congratulations, you have just taken a belly breath. You made a conscious decision for your brain to activate all the muscles
your brain to activate all the muscles and organs required for a breath.and organs required for a breath.
I normally do three large belly breaths at the start of my mindfulness meditation and I normally do three large belly breaths at the start of my mindfulness meditation and then let my breathing resume to normal.
then let my breathing resume to normal.
I refined some mindfulness meditation techniques to develop a unique mindset required I refined some mindfulness meditation techniques to develop a unique mindset required for sustainable sex in two distinct ways:
for sustainable sex in two distinct ways: 1.
1. Healing and positive mindfulness affirmationsHealing and positive mindfulness affirmations 2.
2. Calming the mind through mindfulnessCalming the mind through mindfulness
Healing and positive mindfulness affirmations
Healing and positive mindfulness affirmations –
– think
think
it, feel it, be it!
it, feel it, be it!
The mind doesn’t know what is real and what is fantas
The mind doesn’t know what is real and what is fantas y, which explains why sometimesy, which explains why sometimes we cry during movies or get angry at characters in
we cry during movies or get angry at characters in TV shows even though it’s all makeTV shows even though it’s all make-- believe. Affirmations have the same effect. When we say an affirmation we assert that believe. Affirmations have the same effect. When we say an affirmation we assert that
something we say is actually true, we
something we say is actually true, we believebelieve and and feel feel that it has already happened. that it has already happened. Using my journal, I followed a selection of healing affirmations at
Using my journal, I followed a selection of healing affirmations at thethe beginning beginning and and end
end of every mindful meditation practice; of every mindful meditation practice;
I am enjoying a relaxing and I am enjoying a relaxing and deep sexual experience with my partner.deep sexual experience with my partner.
I am enjoying a fulfilling and I am enjoying a fulfilling and intimate sex life where I last at least ## mins orintimate sex life where I last at least ## mins or
even longer. even longer.
I am celebrating being an intimate an I am celebrating being an intimate and strong lover and I am abd strong lover and I am able to control myle to control my
arousal during sex. arousal during sex.
By saying these affirmations aloud and with emotion, I was able
By saying these affirmations aloud and with emotion, I was able to feel them genuinely.to feel them genuinely. At first, it is hard to say them aloud. I felt very self-conscious, but be assured that
At first, it is hard to say them aloud. I felt very self-conscious, but be assured that repetition helps reprogram
repetition helps reprogram your subconscious.your subconscious.
Breath awareness meditation
Breath awareness meditation
The focus of breath awareness meditation is
The focus of breath awareness meditation is to follow the movement of the breathto follow the movement of the breath through the body. You can practise with background noise, but ensure all electronic through the body. You can practise with background noise, but ensure all electronic devices are turned to silent. Using a timer with a pleasant alert tone is helpful. devices are turned to silent. Using a timer with a pleasant alert tone is helpful.
Visualisation
Visualisation
A mantra or affirmation on its own is
A mantra or affirmation on its own is not sufficient for success. In addition to the othernot sufficient for success. In addition to the other practices, you must have been through th
practices, you must have been through the long, sustainable, intimate sexual experiencee long, sustainable, intimate sexual experience mentally using visualisation. I found out how powerful visualisation was by accident. mentally using visualisation. I found out how powerful visualisation was by accident. With my phallic talisman placed between my legs
With my phallic talisman placed between my legs I would visualise my penis absorbingI would visualise my penis absorbing all its timeless
all its timeless energy and wisdom. I would clasp my phallic talisman between myenergy and wisdom. I would clasp my phallic talisman between my forefinger and thumb, gently stroking the cold hard surface as if it was my penis, which forefinger and thumb, gently stroking the cold hard surface as if it was my penis, which possessed the eternal power to sustain at sex no matter how aroused I got.
possessed the eternal power to sustain at sex no matter how aroused I got. With my eyes closed, I would visualise a naked, gentle female on
With my eyes closed, I would visualise a naked, gentle female on all fours, leaning overall fours, leaning over me as her long, soft hair cascaded over
me as her long, soft hair cascaded over her shoulders. I would visualise the curves of herher shoulders. I would visualise the curves of her hips and her soft round breasts as I ran m
hips and her soft round breasts as I ran m y hands over them, feeling their nurturingy hands over them, feeling their nurturing coolness. I would taste the coolness of her saliva and the sweetness of her delicate coolness. I would taste the coolness of her saliva and the sweetness of her delicate breath as we kissed passionately. Gently she would tilt her hips and slide onto me. breath as we kissed passionately. Gently she would tilt her hips and slide onto me.
Sometimes I would lie for up to half an hour in this
Sometimes I would lie for up to half an hour in this moment with my erection comingmoment with my erection coming and going, using my breath to circulate my sexual energy. These visualisation sessions and going, using my breath to circulate my sexual energy. These visualisation sessions made me radiate with sexual energy, and I would feel a
made me radiate with sexual energy, and I would feel as if I had genuinely sustaineds if I had genuinely sustained myself during an authentic sexual moment, even though I hadn’t been there in realit myself during an authentic sexual moment, even though I hadn’t been there in realit y.y. Despite my desire to sustain from eja
Despite my desire to sustain from ejaculating, I would sometimes fall past the point ofculating, I would sometimes fall past the point of no return in ejaculatory orgasm. I never quite knew the right thing to
no return in ejaculatory orgasm. I never quite knew the right thing to do. If I had lasteddo. If I had lasted that long in an aroused state without ejaculating, s
that long in an aroused state without ejaculating, s hould I orgasm? I had beenhould I orgasm? I had been
ejaculating since puberty and it felt very odd not to ‘finish’. However, I had a nagging ejaculating since puberty and it felt very odd not to ‘finish’. However, I had a nagging feeling that right now, in this time
feeling that right now, in this time of my transformation, it would pay to go against theof my transformation, it would pay to go against the grain of what I considered ‘normal’ or ‘right’. Having read what the
grain of what I considered ‘normal’ or ‘right’. Having read what the Taoist monksTaoist monks believed about conserving male sperm and nu
believed about conserving male sperm and nurturing our powerful jing, I wanted to rturing our powerful jing, I wanted to trytry not to ejaculate every time I became
not to ejaculate every time I became so aroused. I wanted to keep myself accountableso aroused. I wanted to keep myself accountable during this important time.
during this important time.
Practice Everyday For One Month
Practice Everyday For One Month
Its not called a Dail
Its not called a Daily Practice for nothing! If you introduce a new belief to the brainy Practice for nothing! If you introduce a new belief to the brain with emotion
with emotion every day for 30 days it creates a new every day for 30 days it creates a new neural pathway in the brain. If weneural pathway in the brain. If we then continue this positive reinforcement for 90 days, it becomes our primary behaviour then continue this positive reinforcement for 90 days, it becomes our primary behaviour or thought pattern
ejaculation is totally within your grasp. It’s
ejaculation is totally within your grasp. It’s up to you to make it #1 on your list of tup to you to make it #1 on your list of t hingshings to do EACH DAY.
to do EACH DAY.
Thanks for reading. I’m not the master here when it comes to advice, j
Thanks for reading. I’m not the master here when it comes to advice, j ust the student.ust the student. These are my musings, these are the thoughts that inspire me everyday to become a These are my musings, these are the thoughts that inspire me everyday to become a better man, partner and father.
better man, partner and father. My shift in consciousness My shift in consciousnessmade life have so much moremade life have so much more meaning for me.
meaning for me.
P
Plea
lease em
se emai
ail me to
l me to com
comme
ment on anyth
nt on anythiing
ng
– –t
thi
his b
s blo
log i
g i s no
s nothing
thing
wi
I am frequently asked by my readers how to cure ej
I am frequently asked by my readers how to cure ej aculation naturally. There are manyaculation naturally. There are many facets to the cure but overwhelmingly the first s
facets to the cure but overwhelmingly the first step is controlling our unconscious mind.tep is controlling our unconscious mind. Our unconsciousness mind is preoccupied with the tension between the fear
Our unconsciousness mind is preoccupied with the tension between the fear of sufferingof suffering premature ejaculation whilst being consumed with sexual desire. Both are completely premature ejaculation whilst being consumed with sexual desire. Both are completely
natural feelings in response to our surroundings. In this
natural feelings in response to our surroundings. In this two-part blog seriestwo-part blog series I will shareI will share my experience of curing premature ejaculation with a
my experience of curing premature ejaculation with a simple and quick mindfulness andsimple and quick mindfulness and breath awareness meditation.
breath awareness meditation.
By committing 5 minutes a day to stop and listen to your breath and heartbeat
By committing 5 minutes a day to stop and listen to your breath and heartbeat you canyou can learn to ‘flip’ these distracting thoughts and create a mind of quiet confidence and learn to ‘flip’ these distracting thoughts and create a mind of quiet confidence and stillness. Then sustainable sex without premature
stillness. Then sustainable sex without premature ejaculation will follow. Creating aejaculation will follow. Creating a quiet mind is an ongoing process that is frequently called Mindfulness meditation. quiet mind is an ongoing process that is frequently called Mindfulness meditation.
Introduction to Mindfulness meditation
Introduction to Mindfulness meditation
Mindfulness is just breathing and being aware of the moment. It is
Mindfulness is just breathing and being aware of the moment. It is simply connectingsimply connecting with your breath, just like yoga but without the physical movements.
with your breath, just like yoga but without the physical movements.
Mindfulness is a very important part of the daily practice. Mindfulness meditation is a Mindfulness is a very important part of the daily practice. Mindfulness meditation is a conscious act to watch over the subconscious activities of our brain and mind. During conscious act to watch over the subconscious activities of our brain and mind. During my meditation, I picture my mind as a sailboat. The sail
my meditation, I picture my mind as a sailboat. The sail boat travels at great speedboat travels at great speed across bodies of water. That’s it
across bodies of water. That’s its job. Our job durings job. Our job during mindfulness is not to stop themindfulness is not to stop the vessel from sailing. You are the helmsman, at
vessel from sailing. You are the helmsman, at ease at the helmease at the helm enjoying the pureenjoying the pure moment. You
moment. You have the power to steer the sailboat. Whave the power to steer the sailboat. When you notice you are in troubledhen you notice you are in troubled waters (listening to your inner critic for
waters (listening to your inner critic for example), you have the choice to navigate intoexample), you have the choice to navigate into the storm or away from it. You can make that
the storm or away from it. You can make that choicechoice. We then continue to enjoy each. We then continue to enjoy each moment of the journey,
moment of the journey, staying present staying present until we notice the next change in conditions. until we notice the next change in conditions. My meditations nowadays are continually interrupted by thoughts of work, friends or My meditations nowadays are continually interrupted by thoughts of work, friends or family. Lots of them. When I notice I have been dist
family. Lots of them. When I notice I have been distracted from my practice, I simplyracted from my practice, I simply acknowledge,
acknowledge, I have been thinking about wo I have been thinking about work rk and take my attention back to the rise and take my attention back to the rise and fall of my belly. Some days I have to steer m
and fall of my belly. Some days I have to steer m y mind away from many disruptivey mind away from many disruptive thoughts, whereas other times my thoughts only disrupt me a few times. At the end of thoughts, whereas other times my thoughts only disrupt me a few times. At the end of every practice, no matter how distracted I
every practice, no matter how distracted I was, I always feel calmer was, I always feel calmer in mind and body.in mind and body. Shortly, I will list some of the mindfulness te
Shortly, I will list some of the mindfulness techniques in the daily practice but firchniques in the daily practice but first, ast, a word about the breath.
word about the breath.
Mindfulness meditation calms the mind. It helped me control my fears
Mindfulness meditation calms the mind. It helped me control my fears when I waswhen I was preparing myself to have sex again for the first time since my previous embarrassing preparing myself to have sex again for the first time since my previous embarrassing premature orgasm episode. Not only did it calm the negative th
premature orgasm episode. Not only did it calm the negative thoughts, it helped me hearoughts, it helped me hear my positive thoughts reinforcing my belief that I could become a sustainable lover. my positive thoughts reinforcing my belief that I could become a sustainable lover. If Mindfulness meditation makes sense to
If Mindfulness meditation makes sense to you take the next step now inyou take the next step now in Part Two of thePart Two of the Mindfulness PE Cure Series
Mindfulness PE Cure Series and learn how to control your arousal and become aand learn how to control your arousal and become a sustainable lover and man.
sustainable lover and man.
Thanks for reading and as always, email or
Thanks for reading and as always, email or contact mecontact me f f or any questions or advice onor any questions or advice on achieving your potential to become
achieving your potential to become a powerful and sustainable man. My own a powerful and sustainable man. My own journeyjourney with curing
n Part 2 of the
n Part 2 of the Mindfulness Premature Ejaculation Cure SeriesMindfulness Premature Ejaculation Cure Series we look at a simplewe look at a simple breathing technique for connecting with o
breathing technique for connecting with our breath to calm the mind. Connecting withur breath to calm the mind. Connecting with the breath helps achieve your goal of sustainable s
the breath helps achieve your goal of sustainable sex and avoid premature ejaculation.ex and avoid premature ejaculation. Build breath awareness meditation into your daily to help you prepare for longer lasti Build breath awareness meditation into your daily to help you prepare for longer lasti ngng sex. All the daily practices are
sex. All the daily practices are included to help you acknowledge and embrace yourincluded to help you acknowledge and embrace your emotions, desires and fears so that
emotions, desires and fears so that you can concentrate on having total control of youryou can concentrate on having total control of your orgasm, avoiding premature ejaculation and of course, enjoying intimate sex with orgasm, avoiding premature ejaculation and of course, enjoying intimate sex with youryour partner!
partner!
As the nervous system calms in response to slower, deliberate breathing, physical As the nervous system calms in response to slower, deliberate breathing, physical arousal calms down also. This has obvious but very profound benefits in controlling arousal calms down also. This has obvious but very profound benefits in controlling sexual arousal and becoming a sustainable lover.
sexual arousal and becoming a sustainable lover.
You can consciously treat your body to a
You can consciously treat your body to a healing experience by taking a
healing experience by taking a
slow deep breath to a count o
slow deep breath to a count of four and slowly release it for four counts.
f four and slowly release it for four counts.
Do that now…
Do that now…
Congratulations, you have just taken
Congratulations, you have just taken a belly breath.
a belly breath.
You made a conscious decision for your brain to activate all
You made a conscious decision for your brain to activate all the muscles and organsthe muscles and organs required for a breath. If you rest
required for a breath. If you rest your hand on your belly on the inhale, you should feelyour hand on your belly on the inhale, you should feel your belly expand as your diaphragm tightens and moves downwards. This increases the your belly expand as your diaphragm tightens and moves downwards. This increases the capacity of your chest and lets
capacity of your chest and lets your lungs expand. The intercostal muscles (between theyour lungs expand. The intercostal muscles (between the ribs) also help in the same way.
ribs) also help in the same way.
Healing and calming belly breathes can be used at
Healing and calming belly breathes can be used at any time to lower your arousal. Youany time to lower your arousal. You can include the pow
can include the power of your breath in your daily practice as part er of your breath in your daily practice as part of a…of a…
Breath awareness meditation
Breath awareness meditation
The breath awareness meditation will not only lower your arousal and calm
The breath awareness meditation will not only lower your arousal and calm your bodyyour body to prolong sexual intimacy and avoid premature ejaculation. Additionally breath
to prolong sexual intimacy and avoid premature ejaculation. Additionally breath awareness meditation will improve your ability to manage all asp
awareness meditation will improve your ability to manage all asp ects of daily life andects of daily life and enrich your level of fulfillment thus fueling your amazing life potential.
enrich your level of fulfillment thus fueling your amazing life potential. The focus of breath awareness meditation is
The focus of breath awareness meditation is to follow the movement of the breathto follow the movement of the breath through the body;
through the body;
1. Lie flat on the floor, using a rug or yoga mat to cushion your body. Use a thin pillow 1. Lie flat on the floor, using a rug or yoga mat to cushion your body. Use a thin pillow to support your neck and the back of your knees to reduce pressure on your lower back. to support your neck and the back of your knees to reduce pressure on your lower back. 2. Take three belly breaths with the eyes closed.
2. Take three belly breaths with the eyes closed. 3. Say aloud four affirmations to set
3. Say aloud four affirmations to set your intention for your practice.your intention for your practice.
4. Let your breathing return to normal. Focus on the edges of your nostrils. Feel the cool 4. Let your breathing return to normal. Focus on the edges of your nostrils. Feel the cool air entering and the warm, moist air