Style and Syntax Tasks 1 through 6

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Name________________________________ Number_____________________________________

Style and Syntax Assignment #1 The

ABCs of Sentence Combining

This exercise will introduce you to sentence combining--that is, organizing sets of short, choppy sentences into longer, more effective ones. However, the goal of sentence combining is not to produce longer sentenc-es but rather to develop more effective sentencsentenc-es--and to help you become a more versatile writer. Sentence combining calls on you to experiment with different methods of putting words together. Because there are countless ways to build sentences, your goal is not to find the one "correct" combination but to consider dif-ferent arrangements before you decide which one is the most effective.

An Example of Sentence Combining

Let's consider an example. Start by looking at this list of eight short (and repetitive) sentences: She was our Latin teacher.

We were in high school. She was tiny.

She was a birdlike woman. She was swarthy.

She had dark eyes. Her eyes were sparkling. Her hair was graying.

Now try combining those sentences into three, two, or even just one clear and coherent sentence: in the proc-ess of combining, omit repetitive words and phrases (such as "She was") but keep all of the original details. Have you succeeded in combining the sentences? If so, compare your work with these sample combinations: Our Latin teacher in high school was a tiny woman. She was swarthy and birdlike. She had

dark, sparkling eyes and graying hair.

When we were in high school, our Latin teacher was a tiny woman. She was swarthy and birdlike, with dark, sparkling eyes and graying hair.

Our high school Latin teacher was a swarthy, birdlike woman. She was tiny, with dark, sparkling eyes and graying hair.

Our Latin teacher in high school was a birdlike woman, tiny and swarthy, with graying hair and dark, sparkling eyes.

Remember, there's no single correct combination. In fact, there are usually several ways to combine sen-tences in these exercises. After a little practice, however, you'll discover that some combinations are clearer and more effective than others.

Evaluating Sentence Combinations

After combining a set of sentences in a variety of ways, you should take time to evaluate your work and de-cide which combinations you like and which ones you don't. You may do this evaluation on your own or in a group in which you will have a chance to compare your new sentences with those of others. In either case, read your sentences out loud as you evaluate them: how they sound to you can be just as revealing as how they look.

Here are six basic qualities to consider when you evaluate your new sentences:

1. Meaning. As far as you can determine, have you conveyed the idea intended by the original author?

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3. Coherence. Do the various parts of the sentence fit together logically and smoothly? 4. Emphasis. Are key words and phrases put in emphatic positions (usually at the very end or at the very beginning of the sentence)?

5. Conciseness. Does the sentence clearly express an idea without wasting words? 6. Rhythm. Does the sentence flow, or is it marked by awkward interruptions? Do the interruptions help to emphasize key points (an effective technique), or do they merely distract (an ineffective technique)?

These six qualities are so closely related that one can't be easily separated from another. The significance of the various qualities--and their interrelationship--should become clearer to you as you progress in your language abilities.

Evaluating Sentence Combinations

After combining a set of sentences in a variety of ways, you should take time to evaluate your work and de-cide which combinations you like and which ones you don't. You may do this evaluation on your own or in a group in which you will have a chance to compare your new sentences with those of others. In either case, read your sentences out loud as you evaluate them: how they sound to you can be just as revealing as how they look.

Assignment #1

Student Name__________________________ Student Number__________________________

Task: Rewrite the following paper (which has many short sentences) with longer sentences.

My name is Masatoshi Yamaguchi. I have lived in Nogata since I was born. My birthday is October 22 in 1992. I am 18 years old now. My family is composed of father, mother, sister, two cats, and me. I like cats. I sleep in a kotatsu with my cats every winter. They are so cute. I want to see them when I back home. I have some hobbies. First, I like to make something. For example, I make robots, toys, plastic models. My favorite thing to make is a plastic model of car or a motorcycle. I really like Japanese cars. I want to get a license to drive. I want to drive a car. I also belong to the university’s Band. It is very interesting. Revised paragraph

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Name___________________________ Number_____________________________

Assignment #2 The ABCs of Sentence

Building With Adjectives and Adverbs

Combine the sentences in each set into a single clear sentence containing at least one adjective or adverb (or both). Omit words that are needlessly repeated, but don’t leave out any important details.

After you have completed the exercise, compare your new sentences with the original sentences at the bot-tom of this page. Keep in mind that many combinations are possible, and in some cases you may prefer your own sentences to the original versions.

1. Willie had a beard and a moustache. The beard was bushy. The beard was long.

The moustache was droopy.

Combined sentence: __________________________________________________________________ 2. The man handed me a photograph of a woman.

He did this silently. The man was old.

The woman was beautiful.

Combined sentence: __________________________________________________________________ 3. The man handed me a photograph of a woman.

The photograph was torn. The photograph was faded. The woman was young.

Combined sentence: __________________________________________________________________ 4. The photograph brought back memories.

The memories were brought back instantly. The memories were fine.

The memories were old.

Combined sentence: __________________________________________________________________ 5. The photograph of the woman brought back memories.

The memories were brought back instantly. The woman was beautiful.

The woman was young. The photograph was torn. The photograph was faded. The memories were fine. The memories were old.

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Name___________________________ Number_____________________________

Assignment #3 The ABCs of Sentence

Building with Prepositional Phrases

Instructions

Combine the sentences in each set into a single clear sentence containing at least one prepositional phrase. Omit words that are needlessly repeated, but don’t leave out any important details. After you have completed the exercise, compare your new sentences with the original sentences on page two. Keep in mind that many combinations are possible, and in some cases you may prefer your own sentences to the original versions. 1. A mouse darted. It darted across the salad bar. This happened during the luncheon.

Revised sentence__________________________________________________________________ 2. We traveled this summer. We traveled by train. We traveled from Biloxi. We traveled to Dubuque. Revised sentence__________________________________________________________________

3. The convertible swerved, crashed, and caromed. It swerved off the road. It crashed through the guardrail. It caromed off a maple tree.

Revised sentence__________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________________________ 4. Mick planted seeds. He planted them in his garden. He did this after the quarrel. The quarrel was with Mr. Jimmy.

Revised sentence__________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________________________ 5. Grandpa dropped his teeth. His teeth were false. His teeth dropped into a glass. There was prune juice in the glass.

Revised sentence__________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________________________ 6. Lucy played. She was behind the sofa. She was with her friend. Her friend was imaginary. They played for hours.

Revised sentence__________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________________________ 7. There was a man. He wore a chicken costume. He dashed across the field.

He did this before the ballgame. The ballgame was on Sunday afternoon.

Revised sentence__________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________________________

8. A man stood, looking down. He stood upon a railroad bridge. The bridge was in northern Alabama. He was looking down into the water. The water was twenty feet below. The water was swift.

Revised sentence__________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________________________ 9. The gray-flannel fog closed off the Salinas Valley. It was the fog of winter. The fog was high.

The Salinas Valley was closed off from the sky. And the Salinas Valley was closed off from all the rest of the world.

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________________________________________________________________________________ 10. I climbed to my perch. I did this one night. The night was hot. The night was in the summer.

The night was in 1949. It was my usual perch. My perch was in the press box. The press box was cramped. The press box was above the stands. The stands were wooden. These were the stands of the baseball park. The baseball park was in Lumberton, North Carolina.

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Name___________________________ Number_____________________________

Assignment #4 Sentence Building with

Absolutes

Instructions: Combine the sentences in each set below into a single clear sentence with at least one absolute phrase. Here’s an example:

The paperboy stood shivering in the doorway.

His teeth were chattering. His palm was extended. Sample combination:

His teeth chattering, his palm extended, the paperboy stood shivering in the doorway. Exercise: Building Sentences with Absolutes

1 Ed and the little man climbed the stairs together. Each was lost in his own strange world. Revised sentence:_____________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ 2 I sat on the highest limb of a sturdy oak tree. Its branches were reaching to the clouds.

The branches were reaching as if to claim a piece of the sky.

Revised sentence:_____________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________

3 The wolf trots away. His head and tail are erect. His hips are slightly to one side and out of line with his shoulders.

4 The raccoon goes down on all fours and strides slowly off. Her slender front paws are reaching ahead of her. Her slender front paws are like the hands of an experienced swimmer.

5 My grandparents were holding hands in a New York City subway train. Their faces were old. Their faces were beautifully lined. Their gray heads were almost touching.

6 I sat huddled on the steps. My cheeks were resting sullenly in my palms. I was half listening to what the grownups were saying. I was half lost in a daydream

7 One sunny morning I whipped down the Roxbury Road on my bicycle. The front spokes were melting into a saw blade. The wind was shrilling tunes. The tunes came through the vent holes in my helmet.

8 An elderly woman shuffles slowly to a park bench and sits down heavily. Her wig is slightly askew. Her wig is ash-blond. Her wig is showing tuffs of hair. The hair was thin. The hair was gray.

Revised sentence:_____________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________ 9 Arthur fidgets on his high-legged chair. A pencil is poking out from behind his ear.

Arthur is in his box-like office. His office is in the old Loft’s candy factory on Broome Street. Revised sentence:_____________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________

10 There were several species of turtle. These species took to the sea between 90 million and 100 million years ago. The turtles had stubby legs. Their legs were adapting into flippers. The flippers were streamlined. Revised sentence:_____________________________________________________________

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Name ________________________ Number ______________________

Assignment #5 Sentence Building With

Coordinators

By coordinating words, phrases, and / or clauses, combine the sentences in each set into a single clear sentence. Use any basic conjunctions or correlative conjunctions that you think are appropriate. Omit words that are needlessly repeated, but don’t leave out any important details.

primary correlative conjunctions Pairs with coordinating function Correlative conjunctions

both . . . and as . . . as both . . . and

either . . . or just as . . . so either . . . or neither . . . nor the more . . . the less neither . . . nor not . . . but the more . . . the more not . . . but not only . . . but also no sooner . . . than not . . . nor

so . . . as not only . . . but (also) whether . . . or whether . . . or

Punctuation Tips: Using Commas with Conjunctions

When just two words or phrases are joined by a conjunction, no comma is needed: Nurses in uniforms and in peasant costumes walked under the trees with the children.

However, when two or more items are listed before a conjunction, those items should be separated by com-mas:

Nurses in uniforms, peasant costumes, and worn frocks walked under the trees with the children. Task

Rewrite the sentences below into one long sentence, compare your new sentences with the original sentences at the bottom of this page. Keep in mind that many combinations are possible, and in some cases you may prefer your own sentences to the original versions.

1, The dancer was not tall. / The dancer was not slender. / The dancer was extremely elegant. _______________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________ 2. The sound of an automobile horn is muffled. / The sound is indistinct. / The sound seems part of another world.

_______________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________ 3. A few of the strikers obeyed the court order. / They returned to work. / Most of the strikers re-mained on the picket line.

_______________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________ 4. Merdine may be down at the Rainbow Bar. / Merdine may be over at the Chelsea Drugstore. / Merdine is at one of these two places.

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5. The winds dispersed. / The rain slackened to a drizzle and a mist. / The clouds fell apart. / The sun shone through.

_______________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________ 6. The girl was little. / She pressed her nose against the window. / The window was icy. / She giggled with delight. / She had never seen snow before.

_______________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________ 7. The waitress tugged the pencil out of her hair. / Her hair was lacquered. / She licked the pencil point. / She flicked over her bill pad. / She asked if she could take our order.

_______________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________ 8. He turned. / He pushed the bottom strand of wire. / He pushed it down to the ground. / He pushed it with his foot. / He held the middle strand up. / He held it up with his hands. / He did this so Ed and I could walk through.

_______________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________ 9. Papa would sit on the front porch. / Papa would sit after supper. / Papa would sit on summer nights. / The nights were warm. / Papa would tell us stories. / The stories were about ghosts. / The stories were about witches.

_______________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________ 10. The sun would dry the dew. / The dew was on the grass of the park. / The sun would soften the tar. / The sun would bake the rooftops. / The sun would brown us on the beaches. / The sun would make us sweat. / The sun would keep us from the flats. / These were the flats of the tene-ments. / The flats were tight. / The flats were small.

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Name _______________________________ Number__________________________________

Assignment #6 Exercises in Building and

Combining Sentences: Sentence

Build-ing with Adjective Clauses

The adjective clause--a word group that modifies a noun--is a common form of subordination. 1 An adjective clause usually begins with a relative pronoun.

2 The two main types of adjective clauses are restrictive and nonrestrictive.

Now we're ready to practice building and combining sentences with adjective clauses. Consider how these two sentences can be combined:

My mp3 player fell apart after a few weeks. / My mp3 player cost over $200.

By substituting the relative pronoun which for the subject of the second sentence, we can create a single sentence containing an adjective clause:

My mp3 player, which cost over $200, fell apart after a few weeks. Or we may choose to substitute which for the subject of the first sentence: My mp3 player, which fell apart after a few weeks, cost over $200.

Put what you think is the main idea in the main clause, the secondary (or subordinate) idea in the adjective clause. And keep in mind that an adjective clause usually appears after the noun it modifies.

PRACTICE: Building Sentences with Adjective Clauses

Directions: Combine the sentences in each set into a single, clear sentence with at least one adjective clause. Subordinate the information that you think is of secondary importance.

1. The first alarm clock woke the sleeper by gently rubbing his feet. / The first alarm clock was invented by Leonardo da Vinci.

Combined sentence: _____________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 2. Some children have not received flu shots. / These children must visit the school doctor.

Combined sentence: _____________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 3. Success encourages the repetition of old behavior. / Success is not nearly as good a teacher as failure. Combined sentence: _____________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 4. I showed the arrowhead to Rachel. / Rachel's mother is an archaeologist.

Combined sentence: _____________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 5. Merdine was born in a boxcar. / Merdine was born somewhere in Arkansas. / Merdine gets homesick every time she hears the cry of a train whistle.

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6. The space shuttle is a rocket. / The rocket is manned. / This rocket can be flown back to earth. / This rocket can be reused.

Combined sentence: _____________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 7. Henry Aaron played baseball. / Henry Aaron played with the Braves. / Henry Aaron played for 20 years. / Henry Aaron was voted into the Hall of Fame. / The vote was taken in 1982.

Combined sentence: _____________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 8. Oxygen is colorless. / Oxygen is tasteless. / Oxygen is odorless. / Oxygen is the chief life-supporting element of all plant life. / Oxygen is the chief life-supporting element of all animal life.

Combined sentence: _____________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 9. Bushido is the traditional code of honor of the samurai. / Bushido is based on the principle of simplicity. / Bushido is based on the principle of honesty. / Bushido is based on the principle of courage. / Bushido is based on the principle of justice.

Combined sentence: _____________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ 10. Merdine danced on the roof. / It was the roof of her trailer. / Merdine danced during the thunderstorm. / The thunderstorm flooded the county. / The thunderstorm was last night.