Family and Friends

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Family and Friends Toolkit:

How to ……….

A Lemos&Crane workbook, 2010

Discussion Topic

Page

1. Introducing the Family and Friends Toolkit

3

2. Changing your Relationships with Family and Friends

11

3. Making New Friends

15

4. Overcoming Barriers in Re-Connecting with People

19

5. Starting New Activities to Meet New People

22

6. Thinking about the Future

25

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Discussion 1: Introducing the Family and Friends Toolkit

YOU SAY...

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Questions

Questions Answers

Who are the most important people (friends and family) in your life?

Name Check the appropriate box/boxes

Do you spend your free time with this person?

Would you turn to this person if you needed help?

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Suggested Activity – How often you see family and friends

Example

The frequency with which people are seen can be represented in the diagram below.

Me

At least daily

At least weekly

At least monthly

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Map your own relationships

Who do you see the most? Write the names of family and friends on the dotted line based on how frequently you see them.

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Suggested Activity – Understanding the importance of relationships

Steps Activity Example

Step 1 Draw a small circle with your name on the centre of a blank sheet of paper.

Step 2 Write down the people you have a relationship with.

For example:

Mother Sister Boyfriend Brother Father Uncle Aunt

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Step 3 Based on your relationship with the person, draw a line linking them to your name. The line can be used to give more details about the relationship. For example, a jagged line can be used to denote a difficult relationship. In cases where there is no relationship write the names without a line attached to them.

In the example below the most important relationship to the service user is with their boyfriend, followed by their mother. The relationship with the father is fairly important but is also difficult, the difficulties being represented by the jagged line. The service user also has an aunt and uncle but has no relationship with them.

Father (Person’s Name) Mother Boyfriend Brother Sister (Person’s Name)

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Reflections and Review

Question Answer

1. Are there key points, new insights or ideas that have stuck in your mind from this discussion?

Key points / insights / ideas:

2. Is there any action you intend to take as a result?

Actions:

Support Worker Name:

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Discussion 2: Changing your Relationships with Family and Friends

“The purpose of this second discussion is to look at what you would like to see changing in your relationships with your family and friends. It may be that you want to get in touch with someone you used to know or begin to find ways to meet new people and make new friends.”

Afterthoughts and Review of Last Discussion – Introducing the Family and Friends Toolkit Questions Answers

1. How did you feel about the last discussion?

2. Have you had any reflections or insights since the last discussion about relationships?

3. Did you take any action as a result of our last discussion?

4. If so, how did it go? Did you learn anything from it about yourself or about how you should act in the future?

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Questions

Questions Answers Support Worker’s Comments

7. How do you feel about the way things are now with your friends and family?

8. What would you like to see change in your relationships with friends and family?

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10.Are there particular people you would like to get back in touch with or see more of?

11.What do you think about meeting new people?

12.What do you think about taking up new leisure activities?

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Actions:

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Discussion 3: Making New Friends

“ The purpose of this third discussion is to look at what you might gain from getting in touch with people you used to know or from taking up new interests and getting to know new people. It may be that you want to get in touch with someone you used to know or begin to find ways to meet new people and make new friends.”

Afterthoughts and Review of Last Discussion – Changing your Relationships with Family and Friends Questions Answers

6. Have you had any reflections or insights since the last discussion about relationships?

7. Did you take any action as a result of our last discussion?

8. If so, how did it go? Did you learn anything from it about yourself or about how you should act in the future?

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Questions

14.How do you feel about making new friends?

15.If you feel you would like to make new friends what do you think you might get out of it?

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17.If you would like to get in touch with some of them, what do you feel you might get out of it?

18.What do you think about taking up new interests, hobbies or activities?

19.How do you feel about visiting new places, or visiting places from your past again?

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Actions:

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Discussion 4: Overcoming Barriers in Re-Connecting with People

“This discussion focuses on encouraging you to think about how you might go about re-forming old contacts or getting to know new people - and what you might need to do to prepare.”

Afterthoughts and Review of Last Discussion – Making New Friends Questions Answers

10.Have you had any reflections or insights since the last discussion about relationships?

11.Did you take any action as a result of our last discussion?

12.If so, how did it go? Did you learn anything from it about yourself or about how you should act in the future?

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Questions

21.What are your concerns about meeting new people or re-establishing old contacts?

22.What do you feel you need to do to address these concerns?

23.What help do you think you might need?

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Actions:

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Discussion 5: Starting New Activities to Meet New People

“This discussion is about how you might go about starting new activities and meeting new people. Think about which activities you like doing and which you would like to do more of.”

Afterthoughts and Review of Last Discussion – Overcoming Barriers in Re-Connecting with People Questions Answers

13.How did you feel about the last discussion?

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Questions

Questions Answers Support Worker’s Comments What activities would you like to get

involved in? (Please check all relevant boxes)

Volunteering to work with homeless people

Other opportunities for volunteering

Work, training or education

Religious organisation

Self-help group

Sports

Personal interests/hobbies

Political activities or campaigning

Clubs

Outings or holidays

Finding a romantic partner

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10.Is there any action you intend to take as a result?

Actions:

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Discussion 6: Thinking about the Future

“The purpose of this discussion is to encourage you to start thinking about how you want to see yourself in the future.”

Afterthoughts and Review of Last Discussion – Starting New Activities to Meet New People Questions Answers

17.How did you feel about the last discussion?

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Questions

Now look back at how you described yourself in the first discussion. Check if your description reflects the things you value and the things you want to change.

If not, think about and note down how you would like to see yourself and how you would like other people to see you.

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11.Are there key points, new insights or ideas that have stuck in your mind from this discussion?

12.Is there any action you intend to take as a result?

Actions:

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Discussion 7: Next Steps

“The purpose of this discussion is action planning. The idea is that you should plan things which you want to do which are not just general long term aspirations, but specific actions you want to take in the foreseeable future.

Bearing in mind all the previous discussions’ identify three actions that you now want to take. Try to make them as specific and realistic as possible. Try also to set a deadline by which you want to achieve them. So don’t say ‘lose some weight’’ do say: ‘lose one stone by end of March’.

You might also want to identify if you need any one’s help.”

What I'm going to do What help I need When I'm going to do it by

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2.

Family and Friends

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