(eBook - NLP) - Robert Dilts - Articles and Patterns

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Article and Pattern of the Month

Alpha Leadership 80/20 Planning

Archive of Articles and Patterns by Robert Dilts.

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Articles

Patterns

Reflections on September 11 The Principle of Positive

Intention Reframing

Belief Change Cycle Implementing the Belief

Change Cycle The Influence of Timothy Leary

on Re-Imprinting Re-Imprinting

Modeling the Wisdom of Jesus 'Wholeness' Process Darwin's "Thinking Path" Somatic Syntax

Walt Disney Walt Disney - Planning

Strategy (Storyboarding)

The New Leadership Paradigm Moving From Vision to Action

Allergy Process NLP Allergy Technique

The NLP Spelling Strategy Visual Spelling Strategy Search!

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Resolving Conflicts With NLP Integration of Conflicting Parts

Figure And Ground The Foreground - Background

Process

The Phenomenon of Gentling "Gentling" as a Path to Personal Growth

Eye Movements and NLP Eye Scanning Patterns

Hierarchies of Criteria Hierarchy of Criteria Technique

Harnessing the Imagination New Behavior Generator Strategy

Motivation Basic Motivation Strategy

Synesthesia and the Structure of Beliefs

Steps of the Failure Into Feedback Strategy

Modeling Some Beginning Modeling

Drills and Exercises

Presuppositions Operationalizing NLP

Presuppositions

Fourth Position Creating a "We-Field" Intellectual Property and NLP Guidelines for Using

Copyrighted Materials NLP and Self Organization

Theory

Exercise: Shifting and Attractor 'Landscape'

Fractals and Human Behavior Exercise: Making 'Neurolinguistic' Fractals

Pragmagraphics Steps of the Pragmagraphic

Swish Design Pattern

NLP, Aging and Longevity Time Line Longevity Procedure Transderivational Morphology Exploring the Impact of

Transderivational Morphology

Anchoring Exercise: Anchoring a

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Alpha Leadership

by Robert Dilts

Alpha Leadership is a new model of leadership whose purpose is to capture and share

the latest and most up-to-date knowledge about the practice of effective leadership. The model arose as a result of a series of passionate and in-depth conversations and discussions about effective leadership between myself, Anne Deering (a top

consultant for A.T. Kearney) and fellow NLP trainer and coach Julian Russel (founder of PPD Consulting). The Alpha Leadership model defines a set of

principles, tools and skills modeled from observing and coaching world-class leaders from around the world.

Prior to the early 1980s, leadership development in organizations primarily focused on different leadership styles. These styles were most evident in the relationship between leaders and co-workers. Leadership emphasized the characteristics and “rules” for expressing an effective leadership style with respect to a particular situation. It was noticed, for instance, that winning leaders were able to strike a balance between attention to tasks or goals and attention to relationships with team members; a balance that needed to be constantly adapted to specific situations. The mid 1980s saw a shift in focus from “transactional” to “transformational”

leadership, spearheaded by the work of Bernard Bass. In the transformational model, effective leadership was no longer a function of simply adjusting one’s style and actions to a particular situation in order to get someone to efficiently accomplish a specific task, but rather to promote the expression of each individual’s potential (helping him or her to perform “beyond” expected outcomes). Transformational leadership focused on four key additional elements:

1. Vision

2. Change management

3. Motivation to continuous improvement

4. The key role of trust in promoting true team spirit

The last decade has seen an extension of transformational leadership through the skills of visionary leadership and meta leadership (leading and developing other leaders). This has led to the emergence of other leadership abilities in relationship to:

• Promoting Change • Realizing Core Values

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• Developing and Empowering People

Thus, in the emerging views of leadership leaders do not have influence simply because they are ‘bosses’ or ‘commanders’. Rather, leaders are people who are committed to “creating a world to which people want to belong.” This commitment demands a special set of models and abilities in order to effectively and ecologically manifest the visions that guide those committed to change. It involves

communicating, interacting and managing relationships within an organization, network or social system to move toward one’s highest aspirations.

Alpha Leadership represents the leading edge of these developments.

The term “alpha,” which comes from the first letter of the Greek alphabet, means “something that is first,” or “the beginning.” In fact, it is interesting to note that “leading” and “leadership” come from the Old English word lithan (one of the rare English words that actually has an English origin), which literally means “to go.” According to Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary, leadership means “to guide on a way, especially by going in advance.” It is significant that the root of the word leadership does not have to do with “power,” “command,” “dominance,” etc. It has to do with going somewhere together with others. It is not so much about “being number one” as it is about “leading the way” through one’s own actions.

Thus, in its truest expression, leadership is fundamentally about “going first,” and influencing others as much by one’s actions as by one’s words. From this perspective, effective leadership can be viewed as the ability to involve others in the process of

accomplishing a goal within some larger system or environment. That is, a leader

leads or influences a collaborator or group of co-workers towards achieving some end in the context of an organization, social community and environment.

Leaders Involve and Influence Others in Order to Achieve Goals Within a System

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The Alpha Leadership model addresses each of these key elements, which make up the “work space” of leadership, through what we refer to as the “triple As” of

leadership: Anticipate, Align and Act.

Anticipating has to do with the leader’s ability to be aware of the larger system

in which he or she and the team or organization are acting.

Aligning has to do with the way a leader engages and interacts with

others—achieving congruence in his or her own values and desires, and the values and desires of others in order to act effectively in pursuit of business goals and outcomes.

Acting relates to establishing what is important to achieve the business goals,

and making the commitment to persist in areas that make a difference through clarity and constancy of purpose.

The Alpha Leadership Model

Each of these key aspects of leadership is supported by three core skills necessary to bring them into action.

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• Detecting Weak Signals: Similar to the sonar system of a bat, leaders and

organizations need to be able to sense and interpret subtle cues, in order to become aware of trends and patterns in the larger system, even before they happen.

• Mental Agility: Having the flexibility (or “requisite variety”) to respond

appropriately to these signals.

• Freeing Up Resources: Creating organizations fluid enough to respond

quickly to new circumstances.

Align

• Leading Through Embodiment: Developing personal power through

congruence and personal alignment, and being aware of one’s impact on others.

• Task Through Relationship: Establishing cooperation and rapport and

encouraging self-organization through meta leadership.

• Creating Cultures that Can Act: Establishing the conditions in which others

can win.

Act

• The 80/20 Rule: Being efficient, and finding the key leverage points for

effective action— “knowing where to tap.”

• Ready, Fire, Aim: Being proactive and at the same time sensitive to feedback

in order to make “in-course” corrections.

• Dogged Pursuit: Focusing and stretching business goals, being clear about

how the business creates value, and having a strong sense of connection between one’s personal mission and business role.

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Alpha Leadership Principles, Skills and Tools Support Effective Interactions Between Leaders, Co-workers, Business Goals and the Larger System in Which

They Are Acting.

The Alpha Leadership model supplies tools for managers, consultants and coaches to develop more effective leadership ability in themselves and others. While the focus of Alpha Leadership is necessarily on business, the principles, skills and tools can be applied in other contexts in which we want to improve our performance or results. The book on Alpha Leadership is available now.

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80/20 Planning

Stephen Covey recounts the story of an instructor lecturing on time, (First things

first, by Stephen Covey, Simon and Schuster, 1994).

‘At one point the instructor said, “Okay, it’s time for a quiz”. He reached

under the table and pulled out a wide-mouth gallon jar. He set it on the table next to a platter with some fist-sized rocks on it. “How many of those rocks do you think we can get in the jar?” he asked.

After we made our guess, he said, “Okay, let’s find out”. He set one rock in the jar…then another…then another. I don’t remember how many he got in, but he got the jar full. Then he asked, “Is that jar full?”

Everybody looked at the rocks and said “Yes”.

Then he said “Ahhh”. He reached under the table and pulled out a bucket of gravel. Then he dumped some gravel in and shook the jar and the gravel went in all the little spaces left by the big rocks. Then he grinned and said once more, “Is the jar full?”

By this time we were on to him. “Probably not”, we said.

“Good!” he replied. And he reached under the table and brought out a bucket of sand. He started dumping the sand in and it went in all the little spaces left by the rocks and the gravel. Once more he looked at us and said, “Is the jar full?” “No!” we all roared.

He said, “Good!” and he grabbed a pitcher of water and began to pour it in. He got something like a quart of water in that jar. Then he said, “Well, what’s the point?”

Somebody said, “Well, there are gaps, and if you really work at it, you can always fit more into your life”.

“No”, he said, “that’s not the point. The point is this: if you hadn’t put these big rocks in first, would you ever have gotten any of them in?”’

Allocating resources: Getting “the rocks in your jar”

When you think forward 3 to 6 months, what are the REALLY IMPORTANT things you want to achieve, the “rocks in your jar?” (These rocks may be first steps in larger goals visions that may take much longer to complete)

1. List the mix of activities that you need to undertake in the next period of time.

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2. Make up a time allocation worksheet or use the one below. Write the list of activities in the spaces in the middle of the worksheet.

3. On the pie chart on the right, under the column Desired State, represent the percentage of time you will need to allocate to each activity if your key objectives are to be successfully achieved.

4. Now review what you have specified as the allocation you would like, and compare it to the time you actually spend on these activities. Using the pie charts on the left hand side of the worksheet, represent the relative amounts of time you are currently spending with respect to each activity.

5. Now list the people with whom you are collaborating in order to undertake these activities on the second half of the worksheet. Note the proportion of your time you would liketo spend with them in order to be successful in your activities, and note this on the right side of the worksheet. Compare these percentages with the time you actuallyspend with each individual, noted on the left side of the worksheet.

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Reflections on September 11

Dear Friends,

Like many of you probably did, I had a difficult time sleeping following the horrific events of September 11. I saw the nightmarish images of the desrtruction in New York and Washington DC over and over during the day on television, and then again at night in my own mind’s eye. I received many wonderful, empathetic and

supportive e-mails from concerned colleagues around the world. As one friend from the UK wrote: "I don’t know what to say. It's a bad dream and I still hope I will wake up. So much beauty and so much ugliness in the same world. I hope that we in NLP can make some difference to what is unfolding."

My thoughts too have touched upon what these events mean with respect to NLP and the people who practice NLP. My conclusion is that it is a time of "awakening" for us.

The dictionary defines awakening as "rousing from sleep," "emerging from a state of indifference, lethargy or dormancy" or "becoming fully conscious, aware and

appreciative." Times of growth and transformation in our lives are usually accompanied by such "awakenings." It is as if we were roused from a type of sleep—coming out of a self-imposed stupor—or had been blind and suddenly regained sight. Our mental maps of who we are and what is possible in the world become broader, and we perceive old limitations in a completely new way. In these experiences, we succeed in breaking through our old mind set and "get outside of the box."

The results of awakening are frequently a renewed sense of purpose and meaning, expanded awareness, clear perception and emotional and physical revitalization.

Awakening is often associated with cognitive or mental expansion, but can also be related to our heart and emotions. Awakening frequently has to do with reconnecting with our motivations at the deepest level. While waking up is usually exhilarating, it is not always pleasant.

It seems to me that the events of September 11 were a type of unpleasant awakening.

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the great Danish physicist Nils Bohr, who pointed out that there are two types of truth: superficial truth and deep truth. According to Bohr, "In a superficial truth, the opposite is false. In a deep truth, the opposite is also true." Beauty and ugliness are both deep truths. The fact that there is great beauty and hope in the world does not mean that it is not also ugly. And the fact that people are capable of acting so horribly, does not mean that they are not also capable of creating miracles.

Once somebody has been awakened to such a deeper truth, then he or she is able to truly choose. If they are both true, then where do I choose to put my life energy? Do I devote myself to the light or succumb to the darkness?

In fact, it is important to point out that sometimes "the brighter the light, the darker the shadows." When I have had even a minor spiritual awakening, I suddenly see shadows that I didn’t see before because the light has gotten brighter.

When my daughter was born, for example, it was one of the most wonderful experiences of my life. I think it is transformational for a man to have a daughter. When Julia was born, parts of my heart opened that I didn’t even know were there before. She was a really bright light, and I felt totally awake in her presence. But after spending more or less a whole summer with her, I had to travel again. I flew to

Europe to do a seminar. It was the first time I was very far away from her. One morning I was in the bathroom at my hotel getting ready to go to the seminar. I had the television on, and I heard crying in the other room. For a moment, I thought it was my daughter crying in pain or fear. I hurried to the other room and found that the cry was coming from the television. They were showing reports of people in Somalia. On the screen was a baby girl in Somalia who was dying of starvation. Her cry sounded just like my daughter’s. I was so connected to my daughter, it was as if my heart was being broken by the image on television. Before Julia had been born, I would have just seen an anonymous image on television. Now the suffering of a child thousands of miles away was breaking my heart.

I realized in that moment that I had a choice: I could close down and say, "Oh this is something that is happening very far away from me. It is happening to somebody very different from me, that I don’t even know or care about ." Or, I could keep my heart open and realize that the baby was no farther away then than my own daughter (both physically and emotionally). The specter of suffering and death became a very real Shadow. The fact that people were dying of starvation wasn’t something I could just think of as a concept any longer. I was feeling it. And to choose to close my heart would have meant to somehow love my daughter less. I realized that to love my daughter meant that I had to allow my heart to be broken. It was as if someone that I loved was dying and I was helpless to do anything about it. That Shadow had been there all my life, but the darkness and reality of it had never before been so obvious.

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This is an illustration of how, when the light gets brighter, the Shadow becomes more visible. In the presence of the light, we can no longer ignore pain, suffering and fear.

For me that was the decision that I made with respect to the starving baby and my daughter. I decided to ‘love anyway’, which meant loving the little girl who I saw dying on television, even if I was helpless, and could do nothing about it, and even if loving her led to greater pain in my life.

I felt this same pain many times over watching the images on the television yesterday.

It was also the same daughter I just talked about, now 10 years old, who kept asking me, "Why would somebody do such a thing daddy? Don’t they know that they are hurting and scaring people?"

At first, I responded, "Yes, honey, they wanted to hurt and scare people."

"But," she persisted, "why? Why do they want to hurt and scare people. What is it doing for them?"

In her innocent, yet determined desire to understand and change things she was looking for the root cause, the deeper truth, the intention of the perpetrators. This search for a positive intention, especially since when it most difficult, seems to me to part of our task as a people. In Tools of the Spirit, Robert McDonald and I point out that this is the spiritual principle of NLP.

My daughter’s question continued to echo as I heard the haunting cheers of the

children in the Palestinian refugee camp, "America is dead. God is free." What will it do for them if America is dead? What will do for them if God is free? These are some of the first questions we must ask if we are to find other choices and create a true and lasting solution.

A number of times yesterday I was reminded of the story when Albert Einstein was approached by a reporter during an interview and asked something to the effect of,

"Dr. Einstein, you are recognized around the world as one of the most bone fide geniuses of our century, maybe of human history. Your scope of thinking has covered the workings of the universe from the tiny atom to the cosmos. You have seen your discoveries both evolve and enrich, and also mutilate and destroy the human life you so highly value. What, in your opinion is the most important question facing humanity today?"

Characteristically, Einstein stared off into space for a moment, and then looked down at the ground in front of him. Finally he looked back at the reporter and replied, "I

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think the most important question facing humanity is, ‘Is the universe a friendly place?’ This is the first and most basic question all people must answer for themselves.

"For if we decide that the universe is an unfriendly place, then we will use our

technology, our scientific discoveries and our natural resources to achieve safety and power by creating bigger walls to keep out the unfriendliness and bigger weapons to destroy all that which is unfriendly—and I believe that we are getting to a place where technology is powerful enough that we may either completely isolate or destroy ourselves as well in this process.

"If we decide that the universe is neither friendly nor unfriendly and that God is essentially ‘playing dice with the universe’, then we are simply victims to the random toss of the dice and our lives have no real purpose or meaning.

"But if we decide that the universe is a friendly place, then we will use our

technology, our scientific discoveries and our natural resources to create tools and models for understanding that universe. Because power and safety will come through understanding its workings and its motives."

I myself do not know any answers to the many questions that arose as a result of the awful events of September 11, but I know that we must be congruent and awake to find those answers through understanding. In considering how to deal with the consequences of this tragedy, I was reminded of Gregory Bateson's comment that "Love can survive only if wisdom has an effective voice." I was also reminded of the important life lesson I learned as a child from my father that "two wrongs don't make a right." I hope that, as NLPers, the horrible events of September 11 reawaken in us the commitment to continue to "create a world to which people want to belong," and become awakeners ourselves.

In many ways, leaders, coaches, consultants, therapists and teachers are awakeners; opening up new vistas and possibilities for their students, clients and collaborators. Awakening others involves supporting them to grow at the level of vision, mission and spirit. An awakener supports another person by providing contexts and

experiences which bring out the best of that person’s understanding and awareness of purpose, self, and the larger systems to which he or she belongs.

Being an awakener requires the abilities of a coach, teacher, mentor and sponsor to some degree, but has other dimensions. It is obvious that it is not possible to awaken others if you yourself are still asleep. So the first task of the awakener is to wake up and stay awake. An awakener "awakens" others through his or her own integrity and congruence. An awakener puts other people in touch with their own missions and visions by being in full contact with his or her own vision and mission.

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The job of the awakener is to shine light into situations which are dim, not cast his or her own shadow into the darkness that is already there. Awakeners have no illusions about human nature—so they do not have negative surprises. But they have a strong belief about what is possible.

Awakening others involves the unconditional acceptance of who and how they are; yet, at the same time, the suggestion that there are possibilities and choices for

expansion and evolution. Awakening can be gradual or sudden (such as a moment of "epiphany" or sudden insight). Awakening often leads to learning at the level of what Gregory Bateson called Learning IV—the creation of something "completely new."

In NLP the closest thing we do to praying is to "hold an intention." It seems to me to be appropriate at this time for all of us in the NLP community to hold the intention for healing and wisdom—healing for the people and their families who were

devastated by this experience, and wisdom to decide how to respond.

In closing, I offer the words of Albert Einstein:

"A human being is a part of the whole called by us ‘universe’. . . a part limited in time and space. He experiences his thoughts and feelings as separated from the rest—a kind of optical delusion of his

consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty."

Thank you all for your concerns and warms wishes.

Robert Dilts

Santa Cruz, California

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The Article of the Month

by Robert Dilts

Positive Intention

-Bringing Light Into The Darkness: The Principle of Positive

Intention

One of the most important but often misunderstood (and therefore controversial) principles of NLP is that of 'positive intention'. Simply put, the principle states that at some level all behavior is (or at one time was) "positively intended". Another way to say it is that all behavior serves (or at one time served) a 'positive purpose'.

The positive intention behind 'aggressive' behavior, for example, is often 'protection'. The positive intention or purpose behind 'fear' is usually 'safety'. The positive purpose behind anger can be to 'maintain boundaries'. 'Hatred' may have the positive purpose of 'motivating' a person to take action. The positive intentions behind something like 'resistance to change' could encompass a range of issues; including the desire to acknowledge, honor or respect the past; the need to protect oneself by staying with the familiar, and the attempt to hold onto the positive things one has had in the past, and so on.

Even physical symptoms may serve a positive purpose. NLP views any symptoms, including physical symptoms, as a communication that something is not functioning appropriately. Physical symptoms often signal to people that something is out of balance. Sometimes physical symptoms are even a sign that something is being healed.

Sometimes a particular problem behavior or symptom may even serve multiple positive intentions. I have worked with people who wanted to quit smoking, for instance, who discovered that it served many positive purposes. They smoked in the morning in order to "wake up". They smoked during the day in order to "reduce stress," "concentrate" and, paradoxically, "remember to breathe." They smoked at night in order to "relax." Often, smoking served to cover up or 'cloud' negative

emotions. Perhaps most importantly, smoking was the one thing that they did "just for themselves" to bring some pleasure into their lives.

Another basic principle of NLP, that is related to that of positive intention, is that it is useful to separate one's "behavior" from one's "self" - that is, to separate the positive

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intent, function, belief, etc., that generates a behavior from the behavior itself. In other words, it is more respectful, ecological and productive to respond to the 'deep structure' than to the surface expression of a problematic behavior. A consequence of combining this principle with the principle of positive intention is that in order to change behavior or establish viable alternatives, the new choices must in some way satisfy the positive purpose of the previous behavior. When the positive intentions and purposes of a problem state or symptom have not been satisfied, then, ironically, even "normal" or "desired" behaviors can produce equally problematic or

pathological results. A person who stops being aggressive, for instance, but has no other way to protect himself or herself, just exchanges one set of problems for another. Quitting the behavior of smoking without finding alternatives for all of the important purposes that it serves can lead a person into a nightmare of new problems.

According to another basic NLP principle - that of 'pacing and leading' - effective change would first involve 'pacing' by acknowledging the positive intentions behind the existing behavior. 'Leading' would involve assisting the individual to widen his or her map of the world in order to find more appropriate choices for successfully

achieving those positive intentions. These choices would allow the person to preserve the positive intention or purpose through different means. This is what the various NLP techniques of 'reframing' attempt to accomplish.

Why people object to the principle of positive intention.

On one hand, the principle of positive intention - and the approach to change described above - seem quite natural and effective. Yet, the notion of 'positive

intention' has also engendered much criticism and ridicule; even by some members of the NLP community. The objections range from the perception that it is more

theoretical and philosophical than practical, to the belief that it is downright

dangerous. One of the purposes of this article is to acknowledge and address some of these concerns.

The notion of 'positive intention' is more philosophical than scientific. It can't be proved.

Actually, the principle of positive intention does not come from religious or romantic idealism, but rather from the scientific discipline of systems theory. The fundamental premise of the principle of positive intent is that systems (especially self organizing or "cybernetic" systems) are geared toward adaptation. That is, there is a built in tendency to optimize some important elements in the system or to keep the system in balance. Thus, the ultimate purpose of all actions, responses or behaviors within a system is 'adaptive' - or was adaptive given the context in which those behaviors were initially established.

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It is true that you cannot objectively 'prove' that there really is a positive intention behind a particular behavior; that is why it is considered a 'presupposition'. It is

something that is presupposed, not proved. Similarly, one cannot 'prove' that the 'map is not the territory' and that 'there is no one right map of the world'. These are part of the basic 'epistemology' of NLP - they are the basic beliefs upon which the rest of the model is based.

NLP principles and presuppositions are like the fundamental concepts of Euclidian geometry. For instance, Euclid built his geometry upon the concept of the 'point'. A point is defined as 'an entity that has a position but no other properties'-it has no size, no mass, no color, no shape. It is of course impossible to prove that a point really has no size, mass, color, etc. However, if you accept this presupposition, along with a few others, you can build a whole system of geometry. The conclusions of this system can then be 'proved' with respect to their adherence to the fundamental but unproven concepts. It is important to realize that one does not have to accept Euclid's

assumption about a point in order to create a geometry. There are other geometries based on different presuppositions. [For instance, MIT mathematician Seymour Pappert (1980) built his fascinating 'Turtle geometry' for children substituting the notion of a 'Turtle' for a 'point'; a 'Turtle' being an entity that has a position and a direction.]

Thus, accepting the principle of 'positive intention' is ultimately an act of faith. And in many ways, the notion of positive intention is probably the 'spiritual' core of NLP. If we accept that there are positive intentions behind every behavior, then we will find or create them as opposed to waiting for the proof that such intentions exist.

If people supposedly have positive intentions then why do they do such bad things?

It is common wisdom that "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." Having a good intention is not a guarantee of good behavior. People who have good intentions do bad things because they have limited maps of the world. Problems arise when a well intended person's map of the world presents only a few choices for satisfying their intentions.

This is why it is important to consider the principle of positive intention in relation to the other teachings of NLP. Isolated from the other NLP presuppositions and the technology of NLP, the principle of positive intention would indeed be naive idealism. Without the mastery of the NLP change techniques, thinking tools, communication skills etc., it would be irrelevant whether someone had a positive intention or not because we would be helpless to direct their attention to a new behavior anyway. As Einstein pointed out, "You cannot solve a problem with the

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same type of thinking that is creating it." The principle of positive intention must be coupled with powerful and effective creativity and problem solving skills.

It is also important to keep in mind that people can only have a positive intention for the particular part of the total system that they are aware of or identify with. Thus, an individual who is knowingly and 'purposefully' doing something harmful to another, will often have a positive intention for himself or herself which does not include the other. In fact, the concept of 'negative intentions' probably stems from this kind of experience.

The positive intention behind the belief in negative intention and the rejection of the notion of 'positive intention' is undoubtedly "protection." People who reject the notion of positive intention are often afraid of either being or appearing 'naive'. They also often feel helpless to change anything. Without the mastery of the appropriate NLP skills, people simply end up feeling, "If they were really positively intended they would have changed by now."

It is important, however, not to confuse the notion that people are motivated by

'positive intentions' with the idea that people are always able to keep in mind the 'best interests' of others or the rest of the system. The fact that others are positively

intended does not automatically make them wise or capable of being altruistic - these are the result of intelligence, skill and their map of the world. Adolph Hitler had a very positive intention - for the part of the system that he identified with.

A mugger who robs and perhaps even kills another to get money has a positive intention for himself but no identification with the victim. The European pioneers who killed Native American fathers and their families in order to protect their own families had a positive intention but had limited choices. In their map the 'red devils' were not human. The Native American warriors who killed European fathers and their families in order to protect their hunting grounds had a very positive intention, but had limited choices. They both lacked the skills to communicate effectively with one another, and their maps of the world did not allow them to appreciate and manage the cultural differences between them.

Doesn't accepting that a behavior comes from a positive intention make that behavior alright?

The fact that some action or symptom may have a positive intention behind it does not justify the behavior or make it acceptable or "OK." Rather, the principle of positive intention states what is necessary to be able to permanently change a behavior or resolve a symptom or resistance. The principle of positive intention addresses issues of 'change', 'healing' and 'ecology' more so than 'morality' or 'justice'. It is more about the future than the past. The principle of positive intention merely

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asserts that healing or "associative correction" involves adding new choices to the individual's impoverished model of the world. These new choices would need to be able to satisfy the positive intention or purpose that the individual is (consciously or unconsciously) attempting to fulfill, but not have the negative or pathological

consequences of the problem behavior or symptom.

But I can't find any positive purpose to some behaviors.

Positive intentions are not always conscious nor obvious. Because we are not used to thinking in terms of positive intentions, it is sometimes difficult to find them right away and therefore we find it easier to lapse into other explanations for a behavior or symptom. But if one is committed to finding them and looks deeply enough, they will be there.

Sometimes the intention or 'deep structure' is far removed from the surface level behavior. In these cases, the relation between the intention and behavior may seem paradoxical For instance, I have worked with suicidal people who's positive intention is to "attain peace." Parents sometimes physically punish or even abuse their children to "show them that they love them." The mystery of the seemingly paradoxical

relationship between the positive intention and the resulting behavior lies in the past events and model of the world in which the relationship was formed.

Another conclusion of combining the principle of positive intention with other NLP presuppositions is that any behavior no matter how 'evil', 'crazy' or 'bizarre' it seems, is or was the best choice available to the person at that point in time, given his or her model of the world. That is, all behavior is or was perceived as necessary or

appropriate (from the 'actor's' point of view) given the context in which it was established. What happens many times, however, is that the positive intention for which the behavior was established is no longer actually being served by the

behavior. As an example, the positive intention behind 'revenge' is often initially to "put things right" in order to try to heal them. Instead it creates an unending or escalating feud (like the Hatfields and McCoys). To truly heal the situation it is necessary to break the cycle by finding a way of thinking that is different from that which is creating the problem.

What is important to keep in mind is that, even though the situation in which the problematic response was established is now outdated, the positive intention behind it, or the purpose which it was intended to serve, may still be valid and important to acknowledge and address.

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In some situations the positive function of a symptom or behavior was not part of the initiating circumstances but was rather established later as a 'secondary gain'. For instance, a person may not have intended to become physically sick, but nonetheless received a lot of attention and relief from his or her responsibilities when he or she did become ill. This attention and relief, received as a positive by-product of the illness, could become a secondary gain - indicating areas of imbalance in the person's 'normal' life that need to be addressed. If they are not adequately dealt with, the

person may be likely to relapse.

But when I make people aware of perfectly good alternatives they don't always accept them.

It is important to keep in mind at this point that there is a subtle but significant difference between 'alternatives' and 'choices'. 'Alternatives' are external to a person. 'Choices' are alternatives that have become a part of the person's map. An individual could be given many options or alternatives but really have no choice. Choice

involves having the capability and the contextual cues to be able to internally select the most appropriate option.

In NLP, it is also considered important that the person possess more than one other alternative besides the symptom or problematic response. There is a saying in NLP that "One choice is no choice at all. Two choices is a dilemma. It is not until a person has three possibilities that he or she is really able to legitimately choose."

What about when someone admits that he or she has other choices but is still doing the same thing?

What often confuses people about the principle of positive intention is that it seems the person "should know better." They should have the intelligence or maturity to employ other alternatives to achieve their desired intentions. It is not uncommon for a people to say over and over again that they realize something is not good for them or achieving what they really want or intend, yet still persist in the behavior.

The influence of past events often extends beyond the specific memory of the particular situation. Under certain conditions, events can produce altered states of consciousness which lead to a "splitting of consciousness," such that a part of the person's thinking process became disassociated from the rest. This disassociated part of consciousness, what Freud called a "secondary consciousness", could produce ideas which were "very intense but are cut off from associative communication with the rest of the content of consciousness."

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consciousness. There is a wide variety of states which the nervous system is capable of achieving. In fact, from the NLP perspective, it is useful and desirable to have 'parts'. In circumstances that require high levels of performance, for instance, people often place themselves mentally and physically into states that are different from their "normal state" of consciousness. Certain tasks require that individuals use their body and nervous system in special ways. For instance, athletic performances, labor and birth experiences, even tasks requiring high levels of concentration like surgery, are often accompanied by special states. The ideas, perceptions and thoughts that occur in these states can be "associated amongst themselves" more easily than experiences that occur in other states or circumstances. This kind of process is one of the ways that we keep from being overwhelmed by the vast contents of our experiences.

The degree of influence of a particular 'part' depends upon the 'level' at which it has been formed. Some parts are more at the capability level; like a 'creative' part, a 'logical' part or an 'intuitive' part. Other parts are more at the level of beliefs and values; such as a part that 'values health more than success' or a part that believes 'family is more important than career'. Still others may be at the level of identity; such as a part that is an 'adult' versus a part that is a 'child'.

Different 'parts' may have different intentions, purposes and capabilities that may or may not be connected to other parts of a person and to his or her normal state of consciousness. Thus, while one part of a person may understand something, another part may not. One part of a person may believe something is important while another part may believe it is unnecessary. As a result, an individual may have different parts with different intentions. These intentions may come into conflict with one another, or lead to behaviors that seem bizarre and irrational to others and even to part of a person's own consciousness.

In other words, the fact that the "normal consciousness" of a person recognizes other choices does not mean that the "secondary consciousness" that is initiating the

behavior understands or accepts those choices. A symptom is only completely 'reframed' when the part of the person that is generating the problematic response is identified, the positive intention behind the response understood and acknowledged, and when other effective choices for achieving the positive intention have been

internalized by that part. (The specifics of how to conduct such communications have been detailed in a number of NLP books including Roots of NLP, Frogs Into Princes, Solutions, NLP Volume I, Reframing.)

Are you saying that there is no such thing as 'evil'?

The notion of 'evil' is certainly an ancient one. Yet, perhaps surprisingly to some, it has not always existed as an essential part of human consciousness. In his book The Origin of Consciousness in the Breakdown of the Bicameral Mind (1976), Julian

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Jaynes points out that references to the concept of "evil" do not appear in ancient writings or artifacts (Greek, Egyptian or Hebrew) until around 1200 BC. According to Jaynes, in order for the idea of "evil" to arise, people's behavior had to become perceived as being sufficiently disassociated from the will of the various gods that controlled them in order for people to have their own 'free will'. It was only with advent of ongoing contact and interaction between peoples of different cultures, and the resulting belief that the differences in people's behaviors came from their own internal thoughts and wills, that ideas such as 'deception' and 'evil' emerged. Without individual consciousness and will there can be no intent, positive or negative. It would seem that, historically, the concept of evil arose out of our struggle to understand and come to terms with our own internal programming.

Even from the earliest times, however, 'evil' was associated with 'darkness' and 'good' was associated with 'light'. Destructive and harmful behaviors come from 'darkness'. Loving and healing behaviors come from 'light'. This metaphor fits in very well with the NLP notion of positive intention. Positive intentions are like light. Their purpose is to bring illumination and warmth to the world. Symptoms and problematic

behaviors emerge out of the darkness - the places that the light is unable to reach.

It is very important to realize, however, that 'darkness' is not a 'force', it is merely the absence of light. Light can shine into darkness, but darkness cannot 'shine' into light. Thus, the relationship between light and the shadow that it casts is not one of a struggle between opposing forces. The question is, "What is obstructing the light?" and "How can we get some light to where it needs to be?"

From an NLP perspective, 'darkness' comes from a narrow map of the world or from something in that model of the world that is interfering with the 'light' of the positive intention and casting a shadow. Change comes from 'widening the aperture' of the person's map of the world or by finding and transforming the obstacles to the light - not by attacking the shadow. According to NLP, the obstacles to the light come from limiting beliefs or 'thought viruses' in our mental maps of the world. Typically, these obstacles come as beliefs or assumptions which stand in opposition to the basic NLP presuppositions.

For example, consider just how easy it is to create conflict and violence by taking on the following beliefs: "There is only one true map of the world. They (the chosen enemy) have the wrong map of the world - I/we have the correct map of the world. They are negatively intended - they want to hurt us. They are incapable of changing - I/we have tried everything I/we could. They are not part of our system - they are fundamentally different from us."

These beliefs, taken together, have no doubt been at the heart of every atrocity that has been committed in human history. The fundamental 'light' and healing capacity of

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NLP comes from its commitment to promote a different set of presuppositions: "We are a system that is part of much larger system. This system is fundamentally geared toward health and adaptation. Therefore, we are all ultimately motivated by positive intentions. Our maps of the world, however, are limited and don't always provide us with all the possible choices. We are, nonetheless, capable of changing, and once we are able to perceive a truly viable option, we will automatically take it. The issue is to be able to widen one's model of the world to include other choices and capabilities for protection and wisdom and to assist others in doing so as well."

Also see the NLP Pattern of the Month or the Archives if you are interested in checking out NLP in more depth.

You also may want to visit the Anchor Point Page. Anchor Point is the practical journal of NLP.

For information on Robert Dilts’ products and services, please see Upcoming

Seminars or Robert’s Product Page or return to Home Page. If you have problems or comments concerning our WWW service, please send e-mail to the following

address: [email protected].

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The NLP Pattern of the Month:

Reframing

by Robert Dilts.

The Principle of 'Positive Intention'

One of the most important and useful principles for managing change relates to the notion of 'positive intention'. This principle is especially valuable when dealing with resistances and objections. The principle essentially states that: At some level, all behavior is intended or has been developed for some "positive purpose". According to this principle, for instance, resistances or objections would actually emerge from some underlying positive intention or purpose. For example, the positive purpose behind the objection, "It is not desirable to be successful," may be to 'protect' the speaker from oversaturation or failure. The positive intention behind a resistance such as, "It is not possible to change," might be to prevent 'false hope' or to avoid

unrewarded effort.

The principle of positive intention implies that, in order to successfully change a resistance or limiting belief, these underlying concerns, or positive purposes, must be acknowledged and addressed in some way. The positive intention behind a resistance or limiting belief may be addressed directly or by widening the person's map of the situation such that they are able to see choices for satisfying their positive intent other than resistance or interference.

In fact, resistance created by positive intentions often arise from other limiting (and unrecognized) assumptions. For instance, the reason that a person may feel threatened by the "success" may be because that person does not feel he or she has the skills or support to deal with the social impact of being successful. This concern may be addressed by providing the appropriate coaching and guidance for developing the necessary resources. Another way to address this might be to help the person realize that he or she already has the capabilities necessary and is going to be supported.

It is also important at times to inquire directly about the positive intention or purpose behind a particular resistance or limiting belief.

The principle of positive intention is derived from the deeper assumption that people make the best choices available to them given the possibilities and capabilities that they perceive to be accessible within their model of the world. NLP processes, such

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as Reframing, are ways to help people widen their map of a situation and perceive other choices and options.

Thus, when managing an objection or resistance, it is useful to begin by

acknowledging its positive intent and then lead to a wider space of perception or thinking. It is especially important to separate a person's identity and positive

intention from their behaviors. In dealing with interferences, an effective strategy is to first acknowledge the person or their positive intent and then respond to the issue or problem as a separate issue.

It is important to realize that one can acknowledge another person's point of view without having to agree with that person, i.e. it is different to say "I understand that you have this perspective", than to say, "I agree with you". Saying, "I appreciate your concern", or "That is an important question" is a way to acknowledge the person or their intention without necessarily implying that their map of the world is the right one.

In summary, according to the principle of positive intention, when dealing with resistance to change it is important and useful to:

1) Presuppose that all behavior (including resistance and limiting beliefs) is positively intended. 2) Separate the negative aspects of the behavior from the positive intention behind it. 3) Identify and respond to the positive intention of the resistant/problem person. 4) Offer the person other choices of behavior to achieve the same positive intention.

6-Step 'Reframing'

1. Identify the problematic behavior.

"What is the behavior or symptom you want to change?"

2. Establish communication with the part of yourself that is responsible for the behavior.

"Go inside of yourself and ask the part of you that creates this behavior, 'Please give me a signal if you are willing to communicate with me.' Pay attention to any internal words, images or feelings that might be a signal from that part of yourself."

2.1. If you do not get a clear signal, ask the part to exaggerate the signal. You may also use the symptom itself by asking "Please intensify the symptom if your answer is 'yes'."

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not wanting to communicate with me?"

[If you have continued difficulty establishing communication with the part, you may want to try a different change process.]

3. Separate the positive intention of the part from the problematic behavior.

"Go inside and thank the part for communicating with you and ask, 'What are you trying to do positively for me or communicate to me with this behavior?'"

3.1. If the intention of the part seems negative, keep asking "And what will that do positively for me? What is your positive purpose?"

4. Find three other choices that satisfy the positive intention of the part but do not have the negative consequences of the symptom or problematic behavior.

"Go to the 'creative part' of yourself and ask it to come up with at least three other ways to satisfy the positive intention of the problematic behavior."

5. Have the part that creates the symptom or problematic behavior agree to implement the new choices.

"Go inside and ask the part responsible for the problematic behavior, 'Signal me if you accept the alternative choices."

5.1. If any choices are not acceptable, or there is no signal, go to step 4 and modify or add choices.

6. Ecology check. Find out if any other parts object to the new choices.

"Go inside and ask, 'Do any other parts object to these new choices?'"

6.1. If yes, identify the part and go to step 2, repeating the cycle with that part. implement the new choices. "Go inside and ask the part responsible for the problematic behavior

Also see the Article of the Month or the Archives if you are interested in checking out NLP in more depth.

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The Article of the Month

by Robert Dilts

Belief Change Cycle

People often consider the process of changing beliefs to be difficult and effortful. And yet, the fact remains that people naturally and spontaneously change dozens if not hundreds of beliefs during their life. Perhaps the difficulty is that when we

consciously attempt to change our beliefs, we do so in a way that does not respect the natural cycle of belief change. We try to change our beliefs by "repressing" them or fighting with them. According to the theory of self organization, beliefs would

change through a natural cycle in which the parts of a person's system which hold the existing belief in place become destabilized. A belief could be considered a type of high level attractor around which the system organizes. When the system is

destabilized, the new belief may be brought in without conflict or violence. The system may then be allowed to restabilize around a new point of balance or homeostasis.

Organic systems often change through processes that take the form of cycles. While the content of these cycles shift and vary, the deep structure of the cycle stays

constant. From the view of systems theory, therapeutic methods involve a structure in which an existing pattern in the 'landscape' is reaccessed and then 'destabilized' by bringing in new insights and perspectives. When new 'attractors' are introduced into this destabilized state, in the form of new understandings and resources, the system naturally and spontaneously reorganizes itself through "associative correction" into a new stable pattern.

This natural cycle of change might be likened to the changing of the seasons. A new belief is like a seed that becomes planted in the Spring. The seed grows into the Summer where it matures, becomes strong and takes root. In the Autumn the belief begins to become outdated and wither, its purpose served. The fruits of the belief, however, (the positive intentions and purposes behind it) are retained or 'harvested', and separated from the parts that are no longer necessary. Finally, in the Winter, the parts of the belief which are no longer needed are let go of and fade away, allowing the cycle to begin again.

As we prepare for the different stages in our lives or careers, for instance, we 'want to believe' that we will be able to manage them successfully and resourcefully. As we enter that stage of life and learn the lessons that we need in order to manage, we

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become 'open to believe' that we may, in fact, have the capabilities to be successful and resourceful. As our capabilities become confirmed, we become confident in our 'belief' that we are successful and resourceful and that what we are doing is right for us for now. As we begin to pass that stage of life or work, we begin to become 'open to doubt' that the success and activities associated with that stage are really what is most important, priorital or 'true' for us anymore. When we are past that stage, we are able to look back and see that what used to be important and true for us is no longer the case. We can recognize that we 'used to believe' that we were a certain way and that certain things were important; and we can retain the beliefs and capabilities that will help us in our current phase, but we realize that our values, priorities and beliefs are now different.

All one needs to do is to look over the cycles of change that one has gone through since childhood, adolescence, and the stages of adulthood to find many examples of this cycle. As we enter and pass through relationships, jobs, friendships, partnerships, etc., we develop beliefs and values which serve us, and let them go again as we

transition to a new part of our life's path.

In the terms of self organization theory, we can summarize this cycle as a 'landscape' that looks something like the following diagram.

'Landscape' of Natural Belief Change Cycle

What we 'want to believe', what we 'currently believe' and what we 'used to believe', are like three 'basins' in the landscape. The experiences and ideas, both perceived and imagined, which make up our lives can collect or rest in the bottoms of these basins. If one visualizes a particular experience or idea as ball or pebble that can pass over the landscape, then in order to move from wanting to believe something to actually believing it, we must first pass over the part of the landscape in which we become 'open to believe' it. The part of the landscape in which one is 'open to believe'

something new is less stable than those at the bottoms of the basins on either side of it; and it it sometimes requires and investment of effort to reach this part of the landscape. The 'currently believe' basin is represented as deeper than the others because the ideas that we do currently believe are generally held more strongly and are more stable than what we 'want to believe' or 'used to believe'. It also sometimes takes more effort to move one of our current beliefs to the less stable part of our landscape in which we can become 'open to doubt' it. Once we have made that transition, certain aspects of that belief may fall back into the basin of our current beliefs, while other come to rest in the part of the landscape that holds those beliefs that we are aware that we 'used to believe' but no longer believe.

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When something is changing or unstable on one level, it is helpful to establish

stability at the next highest level of 'deep structure'. If, instead of changing behaviors, people are learning a new mental skill or capability, for instance, it is useful for them to have stable beliefs and values in relation to that skill. In other words, even though people be uncertain about their new skill they can be certain in their belief that they will eventually learn the skill and that it is valuable. Likewise, if a person is in a situation where he or she is changing a belief or needing to establish a new belief, it will make it easier if that person has a stable sense of identity. So that even if the person does not know what to believe anymore, the person still knows who he or she is. Similarly, if a person's identity is changing or unstable, it would be important for that person to find a point of stability on a 'spiritual' level in terms of his or her position within the larger system of which he or she is a part.

The experience in 'trusting' in something that is beyond one's beliefs, or trusting in a larger system than oneself, can help to make the process of belief change more smooth, comfortable and ecological. In guiding people through the process of changing their beliefs it is important to have them create a space or location for the experience of 'trusting' in something beyond their beliefs, which serves as a kind of 'meta position' to the rest of the process.

Also see the NLP Pattern of the Month or the Archives if you are interested in checking out NLP in more depth.

You also may want to visit the Anchor Point Page. Anchor Point is the practical journal of NLP.

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The NLP Pattern of the Month: The

Change Cycle

by Robert Dilts.

Implementing the Belief Change Cycle

To implement the Belief Change Cycle, lay out separate locations for each of the states associated with the 'landscape' of belief change. This essentially involves having the person put himself or herself as fully as possible into the experience and physiology associated with each of these aspects of the natural cycle of belief change and 'anchoring' them to specific spatial locations.

1. 'Wanting to believe' something new.

2. The experience of being 'open to believe' something new.

[Note As an additional 'attractor' you may identify a 'mentor' that helped you

to become more 'open to believe' by 'resonating' with, releasing or unveiling something deeply within you. Then make a physical space for the mentor near the 'open to believe' space. Mentors can include children, teachers, pets,

people you've never met but have read about, phenomena in nature (such as the ocean, mountains, etc.) and even yourself.]

3. The beliefs that you 'currently believe' now, including any limiting beliefs or beliefs that conflict with the new belief you would like to have more strongly. 4. The experience of being 'open to doubt' something you had believed for a long

time.

[Again you may identify another 'mentor' that helped you to become more

open to doubt something that was limiting you in your life.]

5. Beliefs that you 'used to believe' but no longer believe. [This is a space we sometimes call the 'museum of personal history'.]

6. An experience of deep 'trust' - perhaps a time when you did not know what to believe anymore but were able to trust in yourself or a higher power.

These states and mentors do not need to have any connection to the current belief issue you are trying to resolve.

'Landscape' of States Associated with the Belief Change Cycle

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Once this landscape has been laid out it can be utilized in many different ways. One of the common ways in which to use it is to have a person think of a new belief that he or she would like strengthen and simply 'walk it' through the natural steps of the cycle. The instructions would proceed as follows

1. Stand in the 'Want to Believe' space, think of the 'new belief' that you would like to have more confidence in. Holding this belief in mind move into the

'Open to Believe' space. (If you have chosen a 'mentor' for this state, you may

step into his or her 'shoes' at this point. Seeing yourself through the eyes of your mentor, you may give the you who is 'open to believe' the new beliefs any helpful advice or support.)

2. Feel what it is like to become more open to believe this new belief. When you intuitively feel the time is appropriate, step into the 'Currently Believe' space concentrating on the new belief you want to have.

3. If there are any conflicting or limiting beliefs that come up in the 'Currently Believe' space, hold them in mind and move to the 'Open to Doubt' space. (Again, if you have chosen a 'mentor' for your 'open to doubt' state, you may step into his or her 'shoes' at this point. Seeing yourself through the eyes of your mentor, you may give the you who is becoming 'open to doubt' any of the limiting or conflicting beliefs any helpful advice or support.)

4. Ecology Check Go to the 'Trust' space and consider the positive intents and purpose of both the new belief and any conflicting or limiting beliefs.

Consider whether there are any changes or revisions you would like to make to the new belief. Also consider if there are any parts of the old beliefs that would be worth retaining or incorporating along with the new belief.

5. Return to the old limiting or conflicting beliefs that you left in the 'Open to

Doubt' space, bringing the insights you had from the 'Trust' space and move

them into the 'Used to Believe' space, your 'Museum of Personal History'. 6. Step back into to the 'Currently Believe' space and focus on the new beliefs

you want to strengthen. Experience your new sense of confidence and

verbalize any new insights or learnings that you may have discovered during this process.

7. Ecology Check Again step into the 'Trust' space and consider the changes you have made. Know that, because this is a natural, organic and ongoing cycle, the process can continue evolve and that you can make any necessary adjustments in the future in the way that is most appropriate and ecological for you.

Many people find that simply walking through these locations (or even imagining walking through these locations) and reexperiencing the states allows them to gently completely shift their beliefs.

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Symbolic Belief Change Cycle

Another application of this belief change 'landscape' involves the creation of symbols for each of the locations. This can be very powerful for two reasons. First, it adds an additional 'attractor' to each state making them more easily accessible. Secondly, as Freud pointed out, symbols often help us to involve unconscious processes more in the process of change.

The symbolic belief change cycle involves creating symbols for each of the states that make up the belief change 'landscape'. The symbols are then synthesized into a

personal story or metaphor for belief change.

When coming up with the symbols, it is important to keep in mind that they do not need to 'logically' relate to each other in any way. They should just simply emerge from your unconscious. It is not necessary that they make any sense at first. Just write down what pops into your mind as a symbol for the state.

Remember the states which make up the landscape and their symbols should be kept general and not connected to any particular belief issues. In this process, there will be separate symbols or characters for the particular belief you would like to have or strengthen, and any limiting or conflicting beliefs. As an analogy, the symbols relating to the states which make up the belief change landscape will make up the 'stage' on which story is played out. The desired and limiting beliefs will be the 'characters' that move around on that stage.

1. Stand into the 'Want to Believe' space and think of what it is like when you want to believe something new. Create a symbol or metaphor for 'wanting to believe' something new.