Put Your Oxygen Mask on First:
Buffering the Impact of School
Shootings on Counselors
ACA Conference, Friday March 29, 2019, 4 – 5 PM # 326 Clinician Session R06
J. Barry Mascari, Ed.D., LPC, LCADC, DRCC-NJ Jane M. Webber, Ph.D., LPC, DRCC-NJ
Why School Shootings Affect Us So Deeply
•
Protect and save innocent children, teens
•
Sudden, random, shock, terrorizing, terrifying
•
Teacher/counselor/parent empathy and
identification
•
Emotion and body dysregulation
Neurobiology of Fear and Dread
• We become triggered when there is little or no danger to us, transforming sadness and grief into fear.
• Amygdalae, our smoke alarm, go off randomly; we react with fight, flight, freeze
• “It could have been my school and my students.”
•
The Unthinkable: Who Survives When
Disaster Strikes–and Why
(Amanda Ripley, 2008)The three chronological phases—denial,
deliberation, and the decisive moment
(fight, flight, freeze)
Dread= uncontrollability + unfamiliarity +
imaginability + suffering + scale of
Empathy Guilt and Survivor’s Guilt
•
Empathy guilt-reacting to another’s distress believing that I
should try to relieve these feelings of not doing enough.
•
Survivor’s guilt: Surviving a traumatic event or counselors
working with victims or survivors, asking why me?
How to survive the unthinkable…
•
Trying to make sense of what is senseless
•
Avoiding graphic illustrations and
reminders of the hot zone
•
Turning off 24/7 TV and media coverage
•
Protecting survivors and families of
GRATITUDE LIST
•
Take a few moments to think about gratitude in your
life.
•
Number your paper from 1-5. List 5 things that you are
most grateful for in your life.
•
Please turn to a person next to you and introduce
yourself and share anything about your gratitude list
that you are willing to share.
IMPACT ON COUNSELORS:
Becoming the Resilient
•
That which is to give light must endure
burning
"it is our heart working in tandem
with our brain that allows us to feel
for others ... It is ultimately what
makes us human... Compassion is
the heart's gift to the rational mind."
It is not compassion that creates the fatigue
“We know that many caregivers experience a high rate
of energetic burnout from not being able to find the
balance between care and
overcare
. That’s
understandable… it’s not an easy task for people who
care deeply. At first, trying to distinguish the difference
between balanced care and overcare can seem
complicated.
This is because when we are in overcare,
Pathways to resilience
•
Social support:
reaching out
•
Meaning making:
telling one’s story
•
Managing emotions: taking heart
•
Successful coping: taking action
Coping with Strong Feelings
• Education about self regulation
• Speak with a spiritual or cultural advisor
• Breathe
• Calming movements such as tai-chi or yoga
• Walk, jog, exercise, relax muscles
• Help others –food prep, supplies
• Bilateral movements: elk, tapping, butterfly hug
• Listen or move to music
• Draw, color…cook, decorate espresso beverages
• Journal, Love Letter to Myself, Healing Story
Counselors’ Support Group
It wasn’t until I heard another counselor share her experience with guilt for not doing enough that something clicked inside me….
I came to understand that there was no number of hours I could volunteer, marches I could walk, sympathy cards I could help my daughter create,
Or money I could donate that would change what had happened to the victims of the shooting.
I realized that ‘never enough’ was good enough.
This realization became a central part of my self-forgiveness and healing.
Existential
Card Sort
Ancient practices are effective
•
Meditation and yoga practitioners, and the labyrinth,
had it right
•
Calm your body by breathing
•
the lungs directly impact the mind
• while it is not quite religion as Westerners know it, Zen regards breathing and the focus of KI (energy) as involving the spirit breath
BRAIN & HEART INTERACT
•
Research suggests that, although the heart reacts to
the brain, the brain reacts to the heart as well.
•
We feel things first in the heart, then the brain
reacts.
•
Sudden, traumatic loss (death of a relative) results
in the pericardium (outer muscle layer) showing
physical wounds; seen mostly in older women.
• Researchers found the effects of music on the heart’s rhythm and blood pressure respond to music, going up and down with volume and beat.
• The magic number IS 10, which syncs with the Mayer Wave
A Simple Practice to reduce stress and build
resilience –
The Quick Coherence
®Technique
• Step 1) Focus your attention in the area of your heart. Imagine your breath flowing in and out of your heart or chest area, breathing a little slower and deeper than usual.
Suggestion: Inhale 5 seconds, exhale 5 seconds (or whatever rhythm is comfortable)
Step 2) Make a sincere attempt to experience a regenerative feeling such as appreciation or care for someone or something in your life.
Suggestion: Try to re-experience the feeling you have for someone you love, a pet, a special place, an accomplishment, etc. or focus on a feeling of calm or ease.
Practice the technique for 2-3 minutes at a time:
• between clients.
• before/after particularly challenging clients.
• periodically throughout your day.
• 5 minutes before bed to create a good night’s sleep.
MAKE YOUR RESILENCY PLAN
•
Use the paper provided to develop your
plan
•
What parts of you would you like to
change?
•
What would you like to do differently in
If you are too busy for
mindfulness, self care, and
meditation,
Aftercare plan
•
Resilience
•
Wellness
•
Personal responsibility
•
Ongoing self-care
•
Connecting
toothers
•
Intimacy/sex
•
Humor
Self-Regulation
Check yourself while you are in your chair
No Clenching
