Oh, I [Or, A Space Play]
A Play in Space
Sam Halgren
5101, Boarshead Rd. #125 Minnetonka, MN 55345
halgrensam@gmail.com
(619) 578-1200
List of Characters:
Becky- Earnest and thoughtful, gentle, reserved. Tom- Animated, sometimes overly so.
Brock- Some guy.
CEO- The founder of StarGenesis, a private space exploration company.
Early morning, a living room on a space station orbiting the planet Earth. It is a comfortable space, cushioned seating, a couple windows, and a console upstage that controls all aspects of the room (climate, sound, light, think universal remote). A freshly brewed pot of coffee sits on a table near the console, complete with multiple mugs, creamers and milk, different types of sugars, and stirring straws. There are boardgames, charts of stars, and various novels and assorted textbooks in a bookcase near the table. The room might resemble the main area of a bed and breakfast one might find in a small town. Becky is on her laptop. It is quiet in the room with Becky’s typing being the only exception. Tom enters in a robe, groggy from sleep.
Tom- Morning
Becky doesn’t respond but continues typing.
Tom- How’d you sleep? Becky- Fine
Tom takes in a deep breath.
Tom- Mmmm breathe in that air. Man-made and appreciated. Makes you happy to be alive.
Becky is typing.
Tom- What do you want to do today? Becky- Nothing.
Tom- Want to watch the Earth rise with me? Want some coffee? Becky- Not really.
Tom- Do you want some dehydrated strawberries? Becky- No
Tom- Do you want some hydrated strawberries?
She doesn’t answer
Tom- Well. Okay then.
Tom walks to the center console of the station and selects Armellodie by Chilly Gonzalez.
He pours himself a mug of coffee and sits at a chair by the window.
Tom- I had that same recurring dream last night. Where I’m smoking a cigarette in the airplane bathroom? Only this time it was different. This time I couldn’t light the damn thing. My lighter wasn’t working, the matches wouldn’t catch. I tried rubbing two sticks together. Nothing. (He
takes a sip of coffee.) What do you think that means? Normally I just light the cigarette, smoke
the whole thing, throw it in the toilette, and then the plane crashes.
Pause
Hey, you can see the Aurora Borealis.
Pause
Hello wispy pretty lights.
Pause
Becky they’re dancing. Becky- Cool.
Tom- Hey Ms. Grumpy-Pants, come look at the Northern Lights with me. Becky- I don’t care about the Northern Lights.
Tom- They look mighty pretty today. Gives you pause.
Pause
Tom- Magical.
Becky- It’s just electrons, Tom. Electrons colliding with the Earth’s magnetic field at the poles. Tom- I know what it is.
Tom- Someone’s in a mood. Becky- Astute.
Tom walks over to the center console of the spacecraft and spitefully pushes a few knobs and buttons, loudly, so Becky can hear him.
Becky- What are you doing?
Tom- Turning up the heat. It’s cold in here. Brrr.
Tom returns to his seat at the window and continues to watch the Earth. He sips his coffee.
Becky finishes typing, rises, and crosses to the console. She changes the music to Bang! by Le Butcherettes.
Tom- Charming.
Becky turns the music up.
Tom- (Shouting over the music) Becky, is this how the day is going to go? Are you going to continue to pout and wallow in your bitter mood like the black jelly bean in the jar? Because if that’s the case I can tune you out, no problem. I have no qualms-
Becky turns the music off.
What’s wrong? Becky- Look.
She hands him the laptop.
Tom- What? Becky- Look.
He looks at the laptop screen.
Tom- Brock… Who is this? Becky- My boyfriend.
Tom- Oh he’s cute. And he’s- oh I’m sorry, who the fuck is this? Becky- Right?
Tom- Who the fuck is this? That’s not you. Posted 3 hours ago? (He scrolls through the
pictures) How many are there?
Becky- RIGHT? I’m freaking out. Tom- Oh my God, is she licking his face? Becky- I’m freaking out Tom.
Tom- This is so trashy, this is such a trashy- This guy is a dick. (To the computer.) You’re a dick. Becky- Tom, I’m freaking out Tom, I’m in space, I’m in space and I’m freaking out.
Tom- Okay, okay, hey hey hey, it’s okay. Sit down. There you go. Becky- I’m going to kill him.
Tom- Why don’t we, play a board game? Becky- I don’t want to play a board game.
Tom- Let’s- do you want some food? Let’s go get some food. Becky- I’m not hungry.
Tom- How about… Becky- I wrote this. Tom- What?
Becky- Read this. Tom- Okay.
She hands him the computer.
Everywhere by Fleetwood Mac plays.
Tom reads.
Brock enters and stands next to Becky. They do their lines out to the audience, never making eye contact with each other. Tom continues to read without acknowledging their conversation.
Becky- Are you sure? Brock- Of course.
Becky- I’m going to miss you.
Brock- I’m going to miss you, little bird. Becky- I didn’t think I was going to win. Brock- Someone had to.
Becky- I can call you every day. Brock- You better.
Becky- I mean, not much else to do up there.
Brock- You can finally get all that writing done you’ve been wanting to do. Becky- Yeah yeah, that’s what I was planning on, just, writing. And in space! Brock- I’m so jealous. I can’t believe they chose you.
Becky- I’m just lucky I guess. Brock- I’m the lucky one.
Music cuts.
Brock exits.
Becky- Well? Tom- It’s brilliant… Becky- Yeah?
Tom- It’s… perfect… Becky- Yeah?
Tom- It’s a masterpiece! Becky- Thank you.
Tom- The word choice, the form, the scathing body image remarks, the- is this whole sentence an alliteration?
Becky- You noticed?
Tom- How did you do this? This whole paragraph is shaped like a middle finger! Becky- I went blind for a moment. It was an out of body experience.
Tom- Remarkable. Truly, remarkable. Wow. Did you send it to him yet? Becky- Yeah.
Pause
Tom- How do you feel? Becky- Awful.
Tom- Well, at least you made history. Becky- What do you mean?
Tom- First space breakup ever. Becky- I guess.
Tom- Put this down in the history books. Becky- Stop.
A beat.
Tom runs to the center console and finds some music.
He plays Disco Infiltrator by LCD Soundsystem.
Tom dances towards Becky, coercing her to dance with him.
When the vocalist begins to sing, Becky dances like a crazy person. Tom turns toward the audience with an unlit cigarette in his mouth. He tries to light the cigarette with a lighter. It doesn’t work. He tries a couple matches. They don’t catch. He pulls out two sticks and tries to start a fire with friction. Nothing. He takes out steel and flint. No sparks.
Tom and Becky are out of breath.
Becky- Yes!
Tom- I’m so out of shape.
Becky- That felt so good. I haven’t danced like that in years. Tom- Yeah?
Becky- I mean, I still don’t feel great but at least I’ve got those endorphins going. Woo! Tom- Woo! Becky- Woo. Tom- Woo! Becky- Woo… Tom- Woo! Becky- Woo……
Becky starts to cry.
She quickly catches herself. It’s almost unnoticeable.
Tom- You okay?
Becky- I’m fine, really, it’s just so stupid. I’m so stupid. I should have never come up here. Tom- Don’t say that.
Becky- Space is stupid. There’s literally nothing in space. I’m surrounded by nothingness. It’s pointless.
Tom- You’d still be dating Brock.
Pause
Tom- Hey, I’ve got- hold on.
He opens it. It’s a Krispy Kreme donut.
Becky- What’s is it?
Tom- It’s a Krispy Kreme donut. Becky- That’s what they look like? Tom- You’ve never had a Krispy Kreme? Becky- I’m a Dunkin’ girl.
Tom- Wow, you’ve got to try it. Becky- Um.
Tom- It’s better if you microwave it for six seconds but ah.
Pause
Tom- You know it tastes better than it looks. Becky- You’re really into this.
Tom- I love Krispy Kreme donuts.
Becky- Wait, why do you even have this? We aren’t allowed to have-Tom- I snuck it on.
Becky- Why?
Tom- I told you, I love Krispy Kreme donuts. Becky- Huh.
Tom- Go ahead.
She takes a bite.
Becky- Oh my God. Tom- Right?
Becky- That was so good. That was so good. Tom that was amazing. Tom- Yeah, you ate it all.
Becky- Oh I’m so sorry, your donut, I didn’t- God I’m the worst. Tom- It’s- fine. Just, how do you feel?
Becky- Better. So much better. Thank you.
Tom- My mom used to take me to the Krispy Kreme donut factory after little league baseball games. I was never any good at baseball, sports at all, really. But she’d always take me there. It was, comfortable.
Becky- Wow. Tom- So there it is. Becky- Yum.
They exchange smiles and maybe a touch of support on the shoulder.
A woman enters and stands at a podium. She speaks.
As she speaks, Tom pours out his now cold coffee, and then pours himself a new cup. He then assumes his previous position watching the Earth and sipping. Becky goes to the bookshelf and browses, eventually settling on some star charts. She inspects them closely. Occasionally looking out the window to see the real stars.
CEO- When I was a child, my parents took me camping. We drove east from LA to Joshua Tree National Park. I had never been away from home, it was my first time out of the suburbs and into the desert. As the sky turned from blue to orange to deep purple to black, I saw for the first time the wealth of stars above me. The heavens opened up, and I discovered a perspective that I had never known, countless white dots peppering the sky, each one a sun like ours with its own particular heartbeat. That night my father discussed with me the great expanse above us. He traced the constellations, pointed to Mars and Jupiter, he told me stories of brave astronauts plunging headfirst into the unpredictable environment of nothingness. I asked him how they did it. Why they did it. Who they did it for. He told me they were simply extraordinary men and women, working for extraordinary people. He said that leaving the planet was very difficult and expensive. That wasn’t very fair, I thought, I wanted to go to space too. He didn’t say anything. He only smiled.
Tom rises and exits, taking some dehydrated strawberries with him and checking Becky’s star charts on the way out. Becky takes his now vacant seat.
When I founded StarGenesis, long after my trip to the desert and the night sky, I had one
objective in mind: bring space to the people. But like my father said so many years ago, leaving the confines of this planet is difficult, and reserved for those who are extraordinary. Well Dad, I reject that. I am now happy to announce that StarGenesis is currently accepting applications for the Space Travel Lottery. This summer, we will randomly select two ordinary citizens of planet Earth to live in space for a month. They, along with a team of trained StarGenesis astronauts, will inhabit the Genesis Space Station, observing experiments, spacewalks, the stars, and the Earth below them.
Becky rises and puts the star charts back on the bookshelf. She looks at the Earth and space again.
And this is just the beginning. StarGenesis wants to bring space to everyone, not just the lucky. We want to change the way mankind views the sky. Shift away from the exclusivity of orbit. Streamline the process and reduce the price of rocketry. Over the next decade, we will establish and populate a moon colony. A colony with real people, true citizens of the Earth ready to extend our reach towards new limits. We will expand the size of the current Genesis Space Station to serve as a terminal for our future expeditions.
Becky exits.
Look at Where We Are by Hot Chip fades in.
My friends, my fellow humans, this is a collective effort, a push for humanity and all it has to offer. Me, you, everyone has a right to experience the unbridled world that exists above us. This is start of something special: our climb towards the stars.
Thank you.
