Home Alone Script
PEOPLE RUNNING ALL OVER THE HOUSE POLICE MAN SMILES (HARRY)… skip …
KEVIN GETS IN TROUBLE STANDS ON STAIRS
Mom: There are fourteen people in this house and you're the only one who has to make trouble. Get upstairs. Kevin: I am upstairs, dummy!
Mom: (Points to attic)
Kevin: The third floor? (looks up) Mom: Goodnight Kevin (coldly)
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KEVIN LAYING IN BED, LOOKING AT CEILING.
Kevin (thoughts): I wish they would all just disappear.
… skip …
KEVIN WAKING UP
KEVIN SLEEPILY COMES DOWN ATTIC STAIRS STOPS IN HALLWAY, CONFUSED FROM QUIETNESS KEVIN WALKS THROUGH THE EMPTY HOUSE
GOES TO THE KITCHEN, TURNS ON TV, SITS DOWN AT TABLE STARES, THEN SHUTS OFF TV
LOOKS AROUND
Kevin: Mom? (pauses) Where are you guys?
WALKS INTO OTHER ROOM
Kevin: Is this a joke?
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KEVIN SITTING ON COUCH, THINKING
REMEMBERS EVERYTHING EVERYONE SAID (BUZZ, UNCLE, ETC.)
Kevin (excited): I made my family disappear!
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KEVIN JUMPS UP AND DOWN ON BED
RUNS BACK UP QUICKLY
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PARENTS ON PLANE, MOM ASLEEP MOM WAKES UP
Mom: I have a terrible feeling I’ve forgotten something.. Dad: About what?
Mom: That we didn’t do something.
SITS AND THINKS FOR A FEW SECONDS, THEN REMEMBERS SUDDENLY SPRINGS OUT OF CHAIR
Mom: Kevin!
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HARRY & MARV SITTING IN CAR AT NIGHT, LOOKING AT HOUSES
Harry: Five families down on one block alone. They all told me from their own mouths. Marv: It's almost too easy. (smiles)
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HARRY DRIVING WITH MARV IN PASSENGER SEAT KEVIN WALKING, ALMOST GETS HIT BY CAR
SCREAMS IN FRONT OF CAR, THEN CONTINUES WALKING SLOWLY SEES HARRY IN FRONT SEAT, FRIGHTENED FACE
STARTS WALKING QUICKLY HARRY CONFUSED
Marv: What’s the matter?
Harry: I don't like the way that kid looked at me.
AS KEVIN WALKS, THEIR CAR SLOWLY FOLLOWS HIM KEVIN STARTS RUNNING
KEVIN SAFELY AWAY BEHIND BUSHES
Kevin: When those guys come back, I’ll be ready for them.
… skip …
KEVIN GETTING READY FOR THE BURGLARS TO COME PLACES HOT IRON ON FRONT DOOR HANDLE
POURS WATER ON BACK STEPS
PUTS LARGE NAIL IN BASEMENT STEPS SQUIRTS GLUE ON CLEAR PAPER MICROWAVE BELL RINGS
CLOCK READS “8:57”
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BURGLARS GET OUT OF VAN
Harry: We'll go to the back door. Maybe he'll let us in. You never know.
Marv: Yeah, he's a kid. Kid's are stupid.
… skip …
KEVIN SITS AT DINING ROOM TABLE WITH MACARONI PUTS HANDS TOGETHER TO PRAY
Kevin: Bless this microwave macaroni and cheese dinner.
OPENS HIS NAPKIN JUST AS CLOCK STRIKES “9:00”
Kevin: This is it. Don't get scared now!
… skip …
HARRY AND MARV KNOCK ON BACK DOOR
Harry: Merry Christmas, little fellow. We know that you are in there, and that you're all alone.
Marv: Yeah, come on kid. Open up. It's Santa Claus and his elf.
KEVIN POINTS GUN THROUGH CRACK IN DOOR KEVIN SHOOTS HARRY IN THE NUTS
Harry: Owww!
HARRY FALLS DOWN IN PAIN, MARV SHOCKED MARV GOES BACK TO DOOR, MAD
STICKS HIS HEAD THROUGH OPENING
Kevin (smiles): Hello.
KEVIN SHOOTS MARVS HEAD MARV PULLS OUT HEAD
Marv: Owww! Kevin: Yes!!!
Marv: The little jerk is ARMED!
… skip …
HARRY STANDS UP
Harry: I’ll go to the front, you go to the basement!
GO TO DESIGNATED SPOTS
HARRY SLIPS ON ICY FRONT STEPS MARV SLIPS ON ICY BACK STEPS
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MARV FINALLY IN BASEMENT
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HARRY FINALLY UP STEPS
Harry (smiles): Finally.
PUTS HAND ON DOOR, SCREAMS FROM HEAT/PAIN
Harry: Owwww!
HOLDS HAND IN PAIN, STICKS IT IN SNOW/WATER
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MARV GOES THROUGH BASEMENT
GOES UP STEPS, STEPS ON NAIL, SCREAMS
Marv: Owwww!
… skip …
HARRY RUNS TO BACKYARD, RUNS AT DOOR
SPITS ON HAND, TOUCHES DOORKNOB CAREFULLY GETS IN, SMILING
Harry: You’re dead, kid!
WALKS INTO HOUSE
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MARVS PULLS HIMSELF UP THE BASEMENT STEPS FINALLY MAKES IT
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HARRY WALKING THROUGH HOUSE, ANGRY
Harry: Where are you, you little creep?
HARRY WALKS TO DINING ROOM, SEES KEVIN ACROSS ROOM
Kevin: Oh no, I'm really scared.
Harry: It's too late for you, kid. We're already in the house. We're going to get you.
Kevin: Okay, come and get me!
… skip …
MARV FINALLY GETS IN, BUT TRIPS OVER ORNAMENTS/TOYS
Marv (angry): I’m going to kill that kid!
HARRY SEES MARV ENTER DINING ROOM
Harry: Marv? Marv: Harry?
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KEVIN YELLS FROM STEPS
Kevin: I'm up here, you morons. Come and get me!
… skip …
HARRY & MARV RUN TOWARDS STAIRS BUT TRIP ON HOTWHEELS CARS KEVIN WATCHING FROM STEPS, LAUGHING
Kevin: You guys give up, or are You thirsty for more?
HARRY GETS UP, STEPPING ON MARV IN THE PROCESS KEVIN RUNS AWAY AS MARV JOINS HARRY ON THE STEPS
Marv: He's only a kid, Harry. We can take him. Harry: Ahh, shut up, will you!
Marv: Oh, you're missing some teeth.
Harry: My gold tooth. My gold tooth. I'll kill him. I'll kill him!
RUN UP STAIRS, ANGRILY
… skip …
KEVIN QUICKLY PICKS UP PHONE, DIALING “911”
Kevin (in deep voice): Help, my house is being robbed. My address is 656 Lincoln Blvd. My name is Murphy.
… skip …
HARRY & MARV GET UPSTAIRS, CHASE KEVIN ON 2ND FLOOR
MARV DIVES AT KEVIN AND GETS AHOLD OF PANT LEG KEVIN PICKS UP SPIDER AND PUTS IN ON MARV
MARV SCREAMS, THROWS THE SPIDER ON HARRY
MARV GETS UP WITH WEAPON, HITS HARRY THREE TIMES
Harry (all times): Ouuuuchhhh!!!
HARRY GRABS CROWBAR, STANDS UP, HITS MARV A COUPLE TIMES
Harry: How ya like that? Huh? Huh?
… skip …
LOOK OUT WINDOW ON THIRD FLOOR
Harry: Where did he go?
Marv: Maybe he commited suicide?
Kevin: Down here you big horses butt! Come and get me before I call the police.
MARVS GETS MAD AND STARTS TO CRAWL OUT WINDOW HARRY STOPS HIM
Harry: Wait, wait, that's just what he wants us to do. Marv: He's calling the cops!
Harry: From a tree house?
START SHIMMYING ON ROPE
HALFWAY THROUGH, KEVIN GETS OUT SCISSORS
Kevin: Hey guys, check this out!
MARV & HARRY START GOING BACK TOWARD HOUSE, SCARED KEVIN CUTS ROPE
Marv & Harry: Ahhhh!
SWING AND HIT HOUSE, FALLING TO GROUND
LAY THERE FOR A WHILE BEFORE STARTING TO GET UP KEVIN RUNS BY THEM
Kevin: Hey, I’m calling the cops!
MARV STOPS HARRY, PUTTING A HAND UP
Marv: Wait, he wants us to follow him. I got a better idea. Come on.
… skip …
KEVIN RUNS TO ANOTHER HOUSE
COMES UP THE BASEMENT STAIRS, HARRY & MARV ARE WAITING
Harry: Hi pal. We outsmarted You this time.
GRABS KEVIN BY COLLAR, DRAGS HIM TO KITCHEN
Marv (smiling): What are we going to do with him, Harry?
Harry: We're going to do exactly what he did to us. We'll bum his head with a blowtorch.
Marv: And SMASH his face with an iron.
MARV RUBS HANDS TOGETHER EVILLY
.,.. skip …
POLICE COME TO HOUSE AND ARREST THEM
… skip ...
KEVIN LOOKS THROUGH WINDOW AS THEY DRIVE AWAY IN POLICE CAR HARRY LOOKS AT KEVIN GRIMLY
