Avenue Q Libretto

Avenue Q

Avenue Q

The Musical

The Musical

 Music and Lyri

 Music and Lyrics by

cs by

Robert Lopez and Jeff Marx

Robert Lopez and Jeff Marx

 Book by

 Book by

Jeff Whitty

Jeff Whitty

 Based on an original concept

 Based on an original concept by

by

Robert Lopez and Jeff Marx

Robert Lopez and Jeff Marx

Original Broadway Cast 

Original Broadway Cast 

(in order of appearance)

(in order of appearance)

Princeton/R

Princeton/Rod...John

od...John Ta

Tartaglia

rtaglia

Brian...Jordan elber 

Brian...Jordan elber 

!ate Mon"ter# L$cy %

!ate Mon"ter# L$cy % other"...&tephani

other"...&tephanie

e 'br$zzo

'br$zzo

 *ic+y

 *ic+y# Tre

# Tre++ie Mon"ter

++ie Mon"ter# Bear and o

# Bear and other"...Ric+ Ly

ther"...Ric+ Lyon

on

,hri"t-a" e...nn 0arada

,hri"t-a" e...nn 0arada

ary ,ole-an...*atalie

ary ,ole-an...*atalie 1e

1enetia

netia Belcon

Belcon

Mr". T.# Bear and other"...Jennifer Barnhart

Mr". T.# Bear and other"...Jennifer Barnhart

n"e-ble

n"e-ble...Barret

...Barret 2oa# Peter Linz

2oa# Peter Linz

Cast of Characters

Cast of Characters

(In order of appearance)

(In order of appearance)

PR3*,T4* 5  fre"h college grad$ate 6ith a B.. in ngli"hB.. in ngli"h BR3* 5 n $ne-ployed a"piring co-edian

BR3* 5 n $ne-ployed a"piring co-edian !T

!T M4*&TR 5  M4*&TR 5  +indergarten teaching aid +indergarten teaching aid R4' 5  Rep$blican ine"t-ent ban+er and a

R4' 5  Rep$blican ine"t-ent ban+er and a clo"eted ho-o"ex$alclo"eted ho-o"ex$al  *3,!7 5 Rod" freeloading roo--ate

 *3,!7 5 Rod" freeloading roo--ate ,0R3&TM& 1 5 Brian" Japane"e fiancee# an

,0R3&TM& 1 5 Brian" Japane"e fiancee# an o$t8of86or+ therapi"to$t8of86or+ therapi"t R7 ,4LM* 5  for-er child

R7 ,4LM* 5  for-er child "tar# no6 the "tar# no6 the "$perintendent of "$perintendent of en$e 9en$e 9 TR!!3 M4*&TR 5 n internet porn addict

TR!!3 M4*&TR 5 n internet porn addict MR&. T03&TLTW

MR&. T03&TLTWT 5 !ate" T 5 !ate" e-ployer# a :crabby e-ployer# a :crabby old bitch;old bitch; T0 BR& 5 T6o c$te bear" 6ith Princeton" be"t intere"t" at heart T0 BR& 5 T6o c$te bear" 6ith Princeton" be"t intere"t" at heart

L<,7 T. &L<T 5  "$ltry lo$nge perfor-er 6ho

L<,7 T. &L<T 5  "$ltry lo$nge perfor-er 6ho get" aro$ndget" aro$nd

Setting

Setting

1

1*< 9 i" *< 9 i" a fictional "treet in a fictional "treet in an o$ter boro$gh of *e6 7or+ ,ity. The ti-e i"an o$ter boro$gh of *e6 7or+ ,ity. The ti-e i" the pre"ent.

the pre"ent.

Suggested Doubling

Suggested Doubling

1

1*< 9 6a" *< 9 6a" originally 6ritten for a ca"t originally 6ritten for a ca"t of nine# incl$ding t6o en"e-bleof nine# incl$ding t6o en"e-ble -e-ber". 0ere are the originally do$bled role".

-e-ber". 0ere are the originally do$bled role". PR3*,T4*# R4'

PR3*,T4*# R4'

!T M4*&TR# L<,7 T. &L<T# 4T0R& !T M4*&TR# L<,7 T. &L<T# 4T0R&  *3,!7#

 *3,!7# TR!!3 M4*&TR# BR =># 4T0R&TR!!3 M4*&TR# BR =># 4T0R& MR&. T03&TLTWT# BR =?# 4T0R&

ACT 1, SCENE 1 – Avenue Q ACT 1, SCENE 1 – Avenue Q

COMPANY COMPANY '4 '44T '44 '4 '44T '44 B ' B0 B ' B0 '4 '44T '4 '4 '44T '4 B ' B0 B ' B0 W W@@

T0 &<* 3& &03*3*# 3T&  L41L7 '7# T0 &<* 3& &03*3*# 3T&  L41L7 '7#  PR2,T M4R*3* 24R  !3' T4 PL7#  PR2,T M4R*3* 24R  !3' T4 PL7# B<T 74<1 4T L4T& 42 B3LL& T4 P7. B<T 74<1 4T L4T& 42 B3LL& T4 P7. W0T ,* 74< '4A W0T ,* 74< '4A 74< W4R! RL 0R' *' T0 P7& RL L4W# 74< W4R! RL 0R' *' T0 P7& RL L4W# *' 1R7 04<R 4&# 40#

*' 1R7 04<R 4&# 40# &4 &L4W#&4 &L4W#

*' T T0 *' 42 T0 '7 T0R& *4 W0R T4 4# *' T T0 *' 42 T0 '7 T0R& *4 W0R T4 4# B<T 04M T4 1*< 9@ B<T 04M T4 1*< 9@ 74< L31 4* 1*< 9@ 74< L31 4* 1*< 9@ 74<R 2R3*'& T4 T44@ 74<R 2R3*'& T4 T44@ 74< R TW*T78TW4# 74< R TW*T78TW4# *' 74< L31 *' 74< L31 4* 14* 1*< 9.*< 9. 74< L31 4* 1*< 9. 74< L31 4* 1*< 9. 74< L31 4* 1*< 9@ 74< L31 4* 1*< 9@

[PRIC!"O enters# dressed in graduation gown and cap$ [PRIC!"O enters# dressed in graduation gown and cap$

PRINCETON PRINCETON W0T W0T '4 74< '4 W3T0  B.. '4 74< '4 W3T0  B.. 3* *L3&0A3* *L3&0A W0T 3& M7 L32 43* T4 BA W0T 3& M7 L32 43* T4 BA 24<R 7R& 42 ,4LL# 24<R 7R& 42 ,4LL# *' PL*T7 42 !*4WL' *' PL*T7 42 !*4WL' 01

01 R*'  R*' M T03& <&L&& 'R.M T03& <&L&& 'R. 3 ,*T P7 T0 B3LL& 7T#

3 ,*T P7 T0 B3LL& 7T# ,<& 3 01 *4 &!3LL& 7T. ,<& 3 01 *4 &!3LL& 7T. T0 W4RL' 3&

T0 W4RL' 3&  B3 &,R7 PL,. B3 &,R7 PL,. B<T &4M04W 3 ,*T &0! B<T &4M04W 3 ,*T &0! T0 2L3* 3 M30T M! T0 2L3* 3 M30T M!  '322R*, T4 T0 0<M* R,@  '322R*, T4 T0 0<M* R,@

[PRIC!"O e%its& '"! MO"!R

[PRIC!"O e%its& '"! MO"!R and BRI enter&$and BRI enter&$ KATE MONSTER  KATE MONSTER  Morning# Brian. Morning# Brian. BRIAN BRIAN 0i# !ate 0i# !ate KATE KATE 0o6" lifeA 0o6" lifeA BRIAN BRIAN 'i"appointing. 'i"appointing. KATE KATE What" the -atterA What" the -atterA BRIAN BRIAN

The catering co-pany laid -e off. The catering co-pany laid -e off.

KATE KATE 4h# 3- "orry@ 4h# 3- "orry@ BRIAN BRIAN

Me too@ 3 -ean# loo+ at -e

Me too@ 3 -ean# loo+ at -e @ 3- ten year" o$t of college# a@ 3- ten year" o$t of college# a nd 3 al6ay" tho$ght 8nd 3 al6ay" tho$ght 8 KATE KATE WhatA WhatA BRIAN BRIAN  *o# it "o$nd" "t$pid.  *o# it "o$nd" "t$pid.

KATE KATE ,o-e on@ ,o-e on@ BRIAN BRIAN W0* 3 W& L3TTL 3 T04<0T 3 W4<L' B... W0* 3 W& L3TTL 3 T04<0T 3 W4<L' B... KATE KATE WhatA WhatA

BRIAN BRIAN  B3 ,4M'3* 4* LT *30T T.1.  B3 ,4M'3* 4* LT *30T T.1. ['"! laug*s$['"! laug*s$ B<T *4W 3M T03RT78TW4# *' & 74< ,* &# B<T *4W 3M T03RT78TW4# *' & 74< ,* &# 3M *4T. 3M *4T. KATE KATE  *ope@  *ope@ BRIAN BRIAN 40 WLL# 40 WLL# 3T &<,!& T4 B M. 3T &<,!& T4 B M. KATE KATE  *ooo.  *ooo. BRIAN BRIAN 3T &<,!& T4 B M. 3T &<,!& T4 B M. KATE KATE  *o@  *o@ BRIAN BRIAN 3T &<,!& T4 B BR4! 3T &<,!& T4 B BR4! *' <*MPL47' *' <*MPL47' *' T<R*3* T03RT78T0R. *' T<R*3* T03RT78T0R. 3T &<,!& T4 B M. 3T &<,!& T4 B M. KATE KATE

4h# yo$ thin+ yo$r life "$c+"A 4h# yo$ thin+ yo$r life "$c+"A

BRIAN BRIAN 3 thin+ "o. 3 thin+ "o. KATE KATE 7o

7o$r proble-" arent $r proble-" arent "o bad."o bad.

3M !3*' PRTT7# *' PRTT7 'M* &MRT 3M !3*' PRTT7# *' PRTT7 'M* &MRT BRIAN BRIAN 7o$ are. 7o$ are. KATE KATE Than+"@ Than+"@ 3 L3! R4M*T3,

3 L3! R4M*T3, T03*& L3! M<&3, *' RT.T03*& L3! M<&3, *' RT. *' & 74< !*4W 3 01  3*T3, 0RT# *' & 74< !*4W 3 01  3*T3, 0RT# &4 W07 '4*T 3 01  B472R3*'A &4 W07 '4*T 3 01  B472R3*'A 2$c+@ 2$c+@ 3T &<,!& T4 B M@ 3T &<,!& T4 B M@ BRIAN BRIAN Me too@ Me too@ KATE KATE 3T &<,!& T4 B M@ 3T &<,!& T4 B M@ BRIAN BRIAN 3T &<,!& T4 B M@ 3T &<,!& T4 B M@ 3T &<,!& T4 B BR3*... 3T &<,!& T4 B BR3*... KATE KATE *' !T@ *' !T@ BRIAN BRIAN T4 *4T 01  J4B@ T4 *4T 01  J4B@ KATE KATE T4 *4T 01  'T@ T4 *4T 01  'T@ BOTH BOTH 3T &<,!& T4 B M. 3T &<,!& T4 B M.

[RO+ and IC', enter fro- t*e center apart-ent$ [RO+ and IC', enter fro- t*e center apart-ent$

BRIAN BRIAN

0ey# Rod# *ic+y# can yo$ "ettle "o-ething for $"A

0ey# Rod# *ic+y# can yo$ "ettle "o-ething for $"A 'o yo$ hae a 'o yo$ hae a "econdA"econdA ROD ROD h# certainly. h# certainly. KATE KATE

Who"e life "$c+" -oreA Brian" or -ineA Who"e life "$c+" -oreA Brian" or -ineA

NICKY AND ROD NICKY AND ROD 4$r"@ 4$r"@ ROD ROD W L31 T4T0R. W L31 T4T0R. NICKY NICKY

WR & ,L4& & P4PL ,* T. WR & ,L4& & P4PL ,* T.

ROD ROD W1 B* T0 B&T 42 B<''3& W1 B* T0 B&T 42 B<''3& NICKY NICKY 1R &3*, T0 '7 W MT. 1R &3*, T0 '7 W MT. ROD ROD

&4 0 !*4W& L4T& 42 W7& T4 M! M RLL7 <P&T. &4 0 !*4W& L4T& 42 W7& T4 M! M RLL7 <P&T. 40# 40# 1R7 '7 3& * 1R7 '7 3& * R1R1T34*.T34*. NICKY NICKY ,4M 4*# T0T& * RT34*@ ,4M 4*# T0T& * RT34*@ ROD ROD 74< L1 74< L1 74<R ,L4T0& 4<T# 74< P<T 74<R 2T 4*  74<R ,L4T0& 4<T# 74< P<T 74<R 2T 4* M7 ,03R.M7 ,03R. NICKY NICKY 4h yeahA 4h yeahA 74< '4 &<,0

74< '4 &<,0 *L T03*&# L3! 3R4*3* 74<R <*'RWR.*L T03*&# L3! 3R4*3* 74<R <*'RWR. ROD ROD 74< M! T0T 1R7 &MLL PRTM*T W &0R  0LL. 74< M! T0T 1R7 &MLL PRTM*T W &0R  0LL. NICKY NICKY &4 '4 74<# &4 '4 74<# T0T& W07 3M 3* 0LL T44@ T0T& W07 3M 3* 0LL T44@ ROD ROD 3T &<,!& T4 B M@ 3T &<,!& T4 B M@ NICKY NICKY  *o@  *o@ 3T &<,!& T4 B M@ 3T &<,!& T4 B M@ KATE KATE 3T &<,!& T4 B M@ 3T &<,!& T4 B M@ BRIAN BRIAN 3T &<,!& T4 B M@ 3T &<,!& T4 B M@ ALL ALL

3& T0R *7B4'7 0R 3T '4&*T &<,! 3& T0R *7B4'7 0R 3T '4&*T &<,! T4 BAT4 BA 3T &<,!& T4 B M@

3T &<,!& T4 B M@

[!.erybody dances and sings /+ + + + +0& C1RI"M !2! yells# and [!.erybody dances and sings /+ + + + +0& C1RI"M !2! yells# and t*en e.erybody continues to dance and sing& C1RI"M !2! enters fro- t*e t*en e.erybody continues to dance and sing& C1RI"M !2! enters fro- t*e rig*t3-ost apart-ent$

rig*t3-ost apart-ent$ CHRISTMAS EVE CHRISTMAS EVE Why yo$ all "o

Why yo$ all "o happyAhappyA NICKY NICKY Beca$"e o$r lie" "$c+@ Beca$"e o$r lie" "$c+@

CHRISTMAS EVE CHRISTMAS EVE 7o

7o$r lie" "$c+A 3 $r lie" "$c+A 3 hearing yo$ correctlyA 0a@hearing yo$ correctlyA 0a@ 3 ,4M3*

3 ,4M3* T4 T03& ,4<*TR7 24R 4PP4RT<*3T3&.T4 T03& ,4<*TR7 24R 4PP4RT<*3T3&. TR3' T4 W4R! 3* TR3' T4 W4R! 3* !4R* 'L3# B<T 3 !4R* 'L3# B<T 3 M JP*&M JP*&.. B<T W3T0 0R' W4R! 3 R* TW4 M&TR& 'R& B<T W3T0 0R' W4R! 3 R* TW4 M&TR& 'R& 3* &4,3L W4R!@ 3* &4,3L W4R!@ *' *4W 3  T0RP3&T@ *' *4W 3  T0RP3&T@ B<T 3 01 *4 ,L3*T&@ B<T 3 01 *4 ,L3*T&@ *' 3 *' 3 0101 * <*MPL47'  * <*MPL47' 23*,@23*,@ *' W 01 L4T& 42 B3LL& T4 P7. *' W 01 L4T& 42 B3LL& T4 P7. 3T &<,! T4 B M@ 3T &<,! T4 B M@ 3T &<,! T4 B M@ 3T &<,! T4 B M@ 3 &7 3T 3 &7 3T &<,!8&<,!8&<,!8&<,!8 &<,!8&<,!8&<,!8&<,!8 &<,!8&<,!8&<,!8&<,!8 &<,!8&<,!8&<,!8&<,!8 &<,!8&<,!8&<,!8&<,!8 &<,!8&<,!8&<,!8&<,!8 &$c+@ &$c+@

3T &<,! T4 B M. 3T &<,! T4 B M. PRINCETON PRINCETON xc$"e -eA xc$"e -eA BRIAN BRIAN 0ey there. 0ey there. PRINCETON PRINCETON

&orry to bother yo$# b$t 3- loo+ing for a place to lie. &orry to bother yo$# b$t 3- loo+ing for a place to lie.

CHRISTMAS EVE CHRISTMAS EVE Why yo$ loo+ing all the 6ay o$t hereA Why yo$ loo+ing all the 6ay o$t hereA

PRINCETON PRINCETON Well 3 "tarted at en

Well 3 "tarted at en$e # b$t "o far $e # b$t "o far eerything i" o$t of -y eerything i" o$t of -y price range. B$t thi"price range. B$t thi" neighborhood loo+

neighborhood loo+" a lot cheaper@ 4h# " a lot cheaper@ 4h# loo+@ a C2or RentC "ign@loo+@ a C2or RentC "ign@

BRIAN BRIAN 7o

7o$ need to tal+ $ need to tal+ to the "$perintendent. Let -e to the "$perintendent. Let -e get hi-.get hi-. PRINCETON PRINCETON reat# than+"@ reat# than+"@ BRIAN BRIAN 7o# ary@ 7o# ary@ GARY COLEMAN GARY COLEMAN 3- co-in@ 3- co-in@ 3- co-in@ 3- co-in@

[4R, COL!M enters and strikes a pose&$ [4R, COL!M enters and strikes a pose&$

PRINCETON PRINCETON 4h -y od@ 3t" ary ,ole-an@ 4h -y od@ 3t" ary ,ole-an@

GARY GARY 7e" 3 a-. 7e" 3 a-.

3M R7 ,4LM* 2R4M T1&

3M R7 ,4LM* 2R4M T1& +I556R!" "RO'!  +I556R!" "RO'!  3 M'  L4TT M4*7 T0T 4T &T4L* B7 M7 24L!&@ 3 M'  L4TT M4*7 T0T 4T &T4L* B7 M7 24L!&@  *4W 3M BR4! *' 3M T0 B<TT

 *4W 3M BR4! *' 3M T0 B<TT 42 1R74*& J4!&#42 1R74*& J4!&#

B<T 3M 0R B<T 3M 0R The "$perintendent@ The "$perintendent@ 4* 1*< 9@ 4* 1*< 9@ ALL ALL 3T &<,!& T4 B 74<@ 3T &<,!& T4 B 74<@ KATE KATE 7o$ 6in@ 7o$ 6in@ ALL ALL 3T &<,!& T4 B 74<@ 3T &<,!& T4 B 74<@ BRIAN BRIAN 3 feel better no6@ 3 feel better no6@ GARY GARY TR7 01

TR7 013* P4PL 3* P4PL &T4PP3* 74< T4 &! &T4PP3* 74< T4 &! 74<D74<D CWhatch$ tal+in abo$t# Willi"AC 3t get" old@

CWhatch$ tal+in abo$t# Willi"AC 3t get" old@

ALL ALL 3T &<,!& T4 B 74<@ 3T &<,!& T4 B 74<@ 4* 1*< 9@ (&<,!& T4 B M@) 4* 1*< 9@ (&<,!& T4 B M@) 4* 1 4* 1*< 9@ *< 9@ (&<,!& T4 B 74<@)(&<,!& T4 B 74<@) 4* 1

4* 1*< 9@ *< 9@ (&<,!& T4 B <&#)(&<,!& T4 B <&#) B<T *4T W0* WR T4T0R@ B<T *4T W0* WR T4T0R@ WR T4T0R  WR T4T0R  0R 4* 1*< 9@ 0R 4* 1*< 9@ W L31 4* 1*< 9@ W L31 4* 1*< 9@ 4<R 2R3*'& '4 T44@ 4<R 2R3*'& '4 T44@ T3L 4<R 'RM& ,4M TR<# T3L 4<R 'RM& ,4M TR<# W L31 4* 1*< 9. W L31 4* 1*< 9. PRINCETON PRINCETON Thi" i" real life@ Thi" i" real life@

ALL ALL W L31 4* 1*< 9@ W L31 4* 1*< 9@ NICKY NICKY

7o$re gonna loe it. 7o$re gonna loe it.

ALL ALL W L31 4* 1*< 9@ W L31 4* 1*< 9@ GARY GARY 0ere" yo$r +ey"@ 0ere" yo$r +ey"@

ALL ALL Welco-e to en$e 9@ Welco-e to en$e 9@ [RO+ and IC', e%it&$ [RO+ and IC', e%it&$

BRIAN BRIAN &o# 6hat" yo$r na-eA &o# 6hat" yo$r na-eA

PRINCETON PRINCETON 4h# 3- Princeton. 4h# 3- Princeton. BRIAN BRIAN 0ey# b$ddy

0ey# b$ddy@ 3- Brian# thi" i" @ 3- Brian# thi" i" -y fiancE.-y fiancE. C.E.

C.E. My na-e

My na-e ,hri"t-a" e@ 7o$ "o c$te# ery ,hri"t-a" e@ 7o$ "o c$te# ery hand"o-e. 7ohand"o-e. 7o$ "ingleA$ "ingleA

PRINCETON PRINCETON 7eah. 7eah. C.E. C.E. Beca$"e "he" "ingle@ Beca$"e "he" "ingle@

KATE KATE 4h# ,hri"t-a" e@ 4h# ,hri"t-a" e@ BRIAN BRIAN

That" !ate@ &he lie" in o$r b$ilding@ That" !ate@ &he lie" in o$r b$ilding@

PRINCETON PRINCETON 0i@ 0i@ KATE KATE 0i@ 0i@

[ window opens# re.ealing "R!''I! MO"!R& 1e

[ window opens# re.ealing "R!''I! MO"!R& 1e t*rows a bag of garbaget*rows a bag of garbage into t*e street wit* a

into t*e street wit* a grunt$grunt$ GARY GARY Tre++ie@ Tre++ie@ BRIAN BRIAN Morning# Tre++ie@ Morning# Tre++ie@ TREKKIE TREKKIE Me no ti-e to tal+. Me b$"y.

Me no ti-e to tal+. Me b$"y. [*uts window$[*uts window$ BRIAN

BRIAN

nd that" Tre++ie Mon"ter. nd that" Tre++ie Mon"ter.

C.E. C.E. 0e a perert.

0e a perert. 7o7o$ no "pending ti-e 6ith $ no "pending ti-e 6ith hi-.hi-.

GARY GARY

,o-e on in"ide# +id. 3ll "ho6 yo$ the place. ,o-e on in"ide# +id. 3ll "ho6 yo$ the place.

PRINCETON PRINCETON 4h# great@ 4h# great@ GARY GARY 7o

7o$ +no6# not -any di"ting$i"hed people hae expre""ed intere"t $ +no6# not -any di"ting$i"hed people hae expre""ed intere"t in thi" finein thi" fine  placeA  placeA PRINCETON PRINCETON  *o +idding@  *o +idding@ GARY GARY  *o lie@  *o lie@

[4R, and PRIC!"O enter t*e left3-ost

[4R, and PRIC!"O enter t*e left3-ost apart-ent$apart-ent$

C.E. C.E.

&o 6hat yo$ thin+# !ateA 0e c$te# rightA &o 6hat yo$ thin+# !ateA 0e c$te# rightA

KATE KATE 7eah.

C.E. C.E. 7o

7o$ go get hi-.  -an $ go get hi-.  -an re"pond to an aggre""ie 6o-an.re"pond to an aggre""ie 6o-an. [to Brian$

[to Brian$ 7o$@ o get Fob@ 7o$@ o get Fob@ BRIAN

BRIAN 3ll get right on it@ 3ll get right on it@ [BRI runs off$ [BRI runs off$

C.E. C.E. &eeA@ &eeA@

ACT 1, SCENE 2 –

ACT 1, SCENE 2 – Ro !n N"#$%&' A(!)*+en*Ro !n N"#$%&' A(!)*+en* [RO+ enters wit* an open book in *is *ands$ [RO+ enters wit* an open book in *is *ands$

ROD ROD

ah# an afternoon alone 6ith -y faorite boo+# CBroad6ay M$"ical" of the ah# an afternoon alone 6ith -y faorite boo+# CBroad6ay M$"ical" of the >GHI".C *o roo--ate to bother -e. 0o6 co$ld it get

>GHI".C *o roo--ate to bother -e. 0o6 co$ld it get any better than thi"Aany better than thi"A

[IC', enters&$ [IC', enters&$ NICKY NICKY 4h# hi Rod@ 4h# hi Rod@ ROD ROD 0i *ic+y. 0i *ic+y. NICKY NICKY

0ey Rod# yo$ll neer g$e"" 6hat happened to -e on the

0ey Rod# yo$ll neer g$e"" 6hat happened to -e on the "$b6ay thi" -orning."$b6ay thi" -orning. Thi" g$y 6a" "-iling at -e and tal+ing to -e

Thi" g$y 6a" "-iling at -e and tal+ing to -e

ROD ROD That" ery intere"ting. That" ery intere"ting.

NICKY NICKY

0e 6a" being real friendly# and 3 thi

0e 6a" being real friendly# and 3 thin+ he 6a" co-ing on to -e. n+ he 6a" co-ing on to -e. 3 thin+ he3 thin+ he -ighte tho$ght 3 6a" gay@

-ighte tho$ght 3 6a" gay@

ROD ROD

he-# "o# $h# 6hy are yo$ telling -e

he-# "o# $h# 6hy are yo$ telling -e thi"A Why "ho$ld 3 careA 3 dont care. Whatthi"A Why "ho$ld 3 careA 3 dont care. What did yo$ hae for l$nch

did yo$ hae for l$nch todayAtodayA

NICKY NICKY 7o

7o$ dont hae to $ dont hae to get all defen"ie abo$t it# get all defen"ie abo$t it# Rod...Rod...

ROD ROD

3- *4T getting defen"ie@What do 3 care abo$t "o-e gay

3- *4T getting defen"ie@What do 3 care abo$t "o-e gay g$y yo$ -et# o+ayA 3-g$y yo$ -et# o+ayA 3-trying to read.

trying to read.

NICKY NICKY

3 didnt -ean anything by it# Rod. 3 F$"t thin+ it" "o-ething 6e "ho$ld be able 3 didnt -ean anything by it# Rod. 3 F$"t thin+ it" "o-ething 6e "ho$ld be able toto tal+ abo$t.

ROD ROD

3 dont 6ant to tal+ abo$t it# *ic+y@ Thi" coner"ation i" oer@@@ 3 dont 6ant to tal+ abo$t it# *ic+y@ Thi" coner"ation i" oer@@@

NICKY NICKY 7eah# b$t... 7eah# b$t... ROD ROD 41R@@@ 41R@@@ NICKY NICKY

Well# o+ay# b$t F$"t "o yo$ +no6... Well# o+ay# b$t F$"t "o yo$ +no6... 32 74< WR 7 32 74< WR 7 T0T' B 4!7. T0T' B 4!7. 3 M* ,<&# 3 M* ,<&# 07#07# 3' L3! 74< *7W7. 3' L3! 74< *7W7. B,<& 74< &# B,<& 74< &# 32 3T WR M# 32 3T WR M# 3 W4<L' 2L 2R T4 &7 3 W4<L' 2L 2R T4 &7 T0T 3 W& 7 T0T 3 W& 7 (B<T 3M *4T 7.) (B<T 3M *4T 7.) ROD ROD

 *ic+y# plea"e@ 3 a- trying to r  *ic+y# plea"e@ 3 a- trying to read....ead....

[pause$ [pause$ WhatA@ WhatA@ NICKY NICKY 32 74< WR 9<R  32 74< WR 9<R  ROD ROD h# *ic+y@ h# *ic+y@ NICKY NICKY 3' &T3LL B 0R# 3' &T3LL B 0R# ROD ROD  *ic+y# 3

 *ic+y# 3- trying to read thi" boo+.- trying to read thi" boo+.

NICKY NICKY 7R 2TR 7R  7R 2TR 7R  ROD ROD  *ic+y@  *ic+y@ NICKY NICKY B,<& 74<R 'R T4 M# B,<& 74<R 'R T4 M# ROD ROD rgh@ rgh@ NICKY NICKY *' 3 !*4W T0T 74< *' 3 !*4W T0T 74< ROD ROD WhatA WhatA NICKY NICKY W4<L' ,,PT M T44# W4<L' ,,PT M T44# ROD ROD 3 6o$ldA 3 6o$ldA NICKY NICKY 32 3 T4L' 74< T4'7# 32 3 T4L' 74< T4'7# C07@ <&& W0T# 3M 7@C C07@ <&& W0T# 3M 7@C (B<T 3M *4T 7.) (B<T 3M *4T 7.) 3M 0PP7 J<&T B3* W3T0 74<. 3M 0PP7 J<&T B3* W3T0 74<. ROD ROD

0igh B$tton &hoe"# Pal Joey... 0igh B$tton &hoe"# Pal Joey...

NICKY NICKY &4 W0T &04<L' 3T MTTR T4 M &4 W0T &04<L' 3T MTTR T4 M W0T W0T 74< '4 3* 74< '4 3* B' W3T0 <7&AB' W3T0 <7&A ROD ROD  *ic+y# that i" R4&&@  *ic+y# that i" R4&&@

NICKY NICKY  *o it" not@  *o it" not@

32 74< WR 7 32 74< WR 7

3' &04<T :044R 3' &04<T :044R 7@7@;; ROD ROD 3 a- not li"tening@ 3 a- not li"tening@ NICKY NICKY *' 0R 3' &T7# *' 0R 3' &T7# ROD ROD La la la la la@ La la la la la@ NICKY NICKY B<T 3 W4<L'*T T 3* 74<R W7. B<T 3 W4<L'*T T 3* 74<R W7. ROD ROD aaah@ aaah@ NICKY NICKY 74< ,* ,4<*T 4* M 74< ,* ,4<*T 4* M T4 LW7& B T4 LW7& B B&3' 74< 1R7 '7# B&3' 74< 1R7 '7# T4 TLL 74< 3T& 4!7# T4 TLL 74< 3T& 4!7# 74< WR J<&T B4R* T0T W7# 74< WR J<&T B4R* T0T W7# *'# & T07 &7# *'# & T07 &7# 3T& 3* 74<R '*# 3T& 3* 74<R '*# 74<R 7@ 74<R 7@ ROD ROD B<T 3M *4T 7@ B<T 3M *4T 7@ NICKY NICKY 3f yo$ 6ere 3f yo$ 6ere gay.gay.

ROD ROD rgh@ rgh@

ACT 1, SCENE  – Avenue Q, ou*'"e P)"n#e*on&' !(!)* ACT 1, SCENE  – Avenue Q, ou*'"e P)"n#e*on&' !(!)* +en*+en*

[4R, sets down so-e -o.ing bo%es on t*e stoop by Princeton6s apart-ent as [4R, sets down so-e -o.ing bo%es on t*e stoop by Princeton6s apart-ent as  PRIC!"O enters fro- t*e apa

 PRIC!"O enters fro- t*e apart-ent$rt-ent$ PRINCETON

PRINCETON

0ey ary# than+" for helping -e -oe in@ 0ey ary# than+" for helping -e -oe in@

GARY GARY

 *o "6eat# it" nothing. 0ey# y

 *o "6eat# it" nothing. 0ey# yo$ got yo$r fir"t day of -ail.o$ got yo$r fir"t day of -ail.

PRINCETON PRINCETON 6# than+"@ 6# than+"@ GARY GARY &o 6hat" in all

&o 6hat" in all the"e boxe"A nything goodAthe"e boxe"A nything goodA PRINCETON

PRINCETON

My parent" "ent -y "t$ff fro- ho-e. My parent" "ent -y "t$ff fro- ho-e.

GARY GARY

0o6 nice@ nd yo$ al"o got

0o6 nice@ nd yo$ al"o got yo$r rent bill# yo$r $tility bill# yo$r yo$r rent bill# yo$r $tility bill# yo$r "t$dent loan bill#"t$dent loan bill# yo$r credit card bill# yo$r phone bill# yo$r cell phone bill...

yo$r credit card bill# yo$r phone bill# yo$r cell phone bill...

PRINCETON PRINCETON 4h -y god. 4h -y god. GARY GARY 7o$ got any -oneyA 7o$ got any -oneyA

PRINCETON PRINCETON Well 3 "tart 6or+ to-orro6... Well 3 "tart 6or+ to-orro6... [a p*one rings& 4R, picks it up$ [a p*one rings& 4R, picks it up$

GARY GARY aaary ,ole-an@ aaary ,ole-an@ [to PRIC!"O$

[to PRIC!"O$ 3t" for yo$. 3t" for yo$.

PRINCETON PRINCETON 4h# than+ yo$@ 4h# than+ yo$@

[4R, *ands PRIC!"O t*e p*one$

[4R, *ands PRIC!"O t*e p*one$ 0elloA 4h# hi@0elloA 4h# hi@ [to 4R,$

4h# 3- "orry# 3 can

4h# 3- "orry# 3 can barely hear yo$. What" that barely hear yo$. What" that "o$nd in the bac+gro$ndA  paper"o$nd in the bac+gro$ndA  paper "hredderA@ B$t the co-pany cant be folding@ Well ho6 a- 3 "$ppo"ed to lieA ... "hredderA@ B$t the co-pany cant be folding@ Well ho6 a- 3 "$ppo"ed to lieA ... 0elloA

0elloA GARY GARY 6

6# +id. 'ont loo+ "o # +id. 'ont loo+ "o long in the face@ 7o$ +no6 6hat they "ayD if long in the face@ 7o$ +no6 6hat they "ayD if yo$ rearrangeyo$ rearrange the letter" of :$ne-ployed;

the letter" of :$ne-ployed; it "pell" :opport$nity;@it "pell" :opport$nity;@ PRINCETON PRINCETON WhatA WhatA GARY GARY 0ere" a bit of adice. *e

0ere" a bit of adice. *e er $ndere"ti-ate the po6er of long8range planning. 3fer $ndere"ti-ate the po6er of long8range planning. 3f life" get" yo$ do6n# dont "it on yo$r a"" and let it

life" get" yo$ do6n# dont "it on yo$r a"" and let it pa"" yo$ by. Tpa"" yo$ by. Ta+e it fro-a+e it fro-"o-eone 6ho learned it the hard 6ayD ary ,ole-an.

"o-eone 6ho learned it the hard 6ayD ary ,ole-an. [4R, e%its into apart-ent 

[4R, e%its into apart-ent .. PRINCETON PRINCETON

Maybe thi" 3& an opport$nity. May

Maybe thi" 3& an opport$nity. Maybe 3- not -eant to be 3- not -eant to 6or+ in "o-e d$-b office6or+ in "o-e d$-b office for the re"t of -y life. Ma

for the re"t of -y life. Ma ybe... -aybe 3 hae a higher p$rpo"e@ybe... -aybe 3 hae a higher p$rpo"e@ VOICE -on v"eo

VOICE -on v"eo What" a p$rpo"eA  p$rpo

What" a p$rpo"eA  p$rpo"e i" direction to yo$r life. 3t co$ld be "e i" direction to yo$r life. 3t co$ld be a Fob# a fa-ilyK ita Fob# a fa-ilyK it co$ld be p$r"$it of +no6ledge# or

co$ld be p$r"$it of +no6ledge# or 6ealth. erybody" p$rpo"e i" different. The6ealth. erybody" p$rpo"e i" different. The  be"t thing abo$t p$rpo

 be"t thing abo$t p$rpo"e i" that it gie" yo$r life -eaning."e i" that it gie" yo$r life -eaning. PRINCETON PRINCETON 3 6ant a p$rpo"e@ 3 6ant a p$rpo"e@ PRINCETON PRINCETON P<RP4&# P<RP4&# 3T& T0T L3TTL 2LM 3T& T0T L3TTL 2LM T0T L30T&  23R <*'R 74<R &&. T0T L30T&  23R <*'R 74<R &&. P<RP4&# P<RP4&# 3T !P& 74< 43* &TR4* 3T !P& 74< 43* &TR4* L3!  ,R W3T0  2<LL T*! 42 &. L3!  ,R W3T0  2<LL T*! 42 &.

1R74* L& 0&  P<RP4& 1R74* L& 0&  P<RP4& &4 W0T& M3*A

&4 W0T& M3*A 4h# loo+@ 0ere" a penny@ 4h# loo+@ 0ere" a penny@

3t" fro- the year 3 6a" born@ 3t" fro- the year 3 6a" born@

3T&  &3*@ 3T&  &3*@ B8B8B8B B8B8B8B '448'448'448'448'44 '448'448'448'448'44 3 '4*T !*4W 04W 3 !*4W# 3 '4*T !*4W 04W 3 !*4W# B<T 3M 4** 23*' M7 P<RP4&. B<T 3M 4** 23*' M7 P<RP4&. 3 '4*T !*4W W0R 3M 4** L44!# 3 '4*T !*4W W0R 3M 4** L44!# B<T 3M 4** 23*' M7 P<RP4&. B<T 3M 4** 23*' M7 P<RP4&. 4TT 23*' 4<T# '4*T W** W3T@ 4TT 23*' 4<T# '4*T W** W3T@ 4T T4 M! &<R T0T M7 L32 W3LL B RT@ 4T T4 M! &<R T0T M7 L32 W3LL B RT@ 4TT 23*' M7 P<RP4& B24R 3T& T44 LT. 4TT 23*' M7 P<RP4& B24R 3T& T44 LT.

MOVING BO/ES AND OTHERS MOVING BO/ES AND OTHERS 0& 4** 23*' 03& P<RP4& 0& 4** 23*' 03& P<RP4&

PRINCETON PRINCETON

W40# 3M 4** 23*' M7 P<RP4& W40# 3M 4** 23*' M7 P<RP4& MOVING BO/ES AND OTHERS MOVING BO/ES AND OTHERS 0& 4** 23*' 03& P<RP4& 0& 4** 23*' 03& P<RP4&

PRINCETON -S"+u0*!neou' PRINCETON -S"+u0*!neou' 708080# 708080# 3M 4** 23*' M7 P<RP4& 3M 4** 23*' M7 P<RP4& ,4<L' B 2R# ,4<L' B *R  ,4<L' B 2R# ,4<L' B *R  ,4<L' T!  W!#  M4*T0#  7R ,4<L' T!  W!#  M4*T0#  7R T 

T  J4B# 4R J4B# 4R &M4!3* R&&&M4!3* R&& M7B T  P4TTR7 ,L&&@ M7B T  P4TTR7 ,L&&@ ,4<L' 3T BA ,4<L' 3T BA 7& 3T ,4<L'@ 7& 3T ,4<L'@ &4MT03*& ,4M3* &4MT03*& ,4M3* &4MT03* 44' &4MT03* 44' 3M 4** 23*' M7 P<RP4&# 70@ 3M 4** 23*' M7 P<RP4&# 70@ W04# 440 W04# W04# 440 W04# 3M 4** 23*' 3T@ 3M 4** 23*' 3T@ W0T W3LL 3T BA W0T W3LL 3T BA W0R W3LL 3T BA W0R W3LL 3T BA

M7 P<RP4& 3*

M7 P<RP4& 3* L32 3&  M7&TR7L32 3&  M7&TR7 4TT 23*' M7 P<RP4& 4TT 23*' M7 P<RP4& 4TT 23*' M@ 4TT 23*' M@ W04# 440 W04 W04# 440 W04 3M 4** 23*' M7 P<RP4& 3M 4** 23*' M7 P<RP4& P<RP4&@ P<RP4&@ P<RP4&@ P<RP4&@ P<RP4&@ P<RP4&@ 70# 70@

70# 70@ 3 4TT 23*' M@ 3 4TT 23*' M@

MOVING BO/ES AND OTHERS -S"+u0*!neou' MOVING BO/ES AND OTHERS -S"+u0*!neou' M7B M4R... M7B M4R... T  J4B# 4R &M4!3* R&& T  J4B# 4R &M4!3* R&& P4TTR7 ,L&& P4TTR7 ,L&& W4<L' B ,44L... W4<L' B ,44L... 7& 3T ,4<L'@ 7& 3T ,4<L'@ &4MT03* 44' &4MT03* 44' W40# 40# 40 W40# 40# 40 74<R 4** 23*' 74<R P<RP4& 74<R 4** 23*' 74<R P<RP4& 4** 23*' 74<R P<RP4&@ 4** 23*' 74<R P<RP4&@ 4TT 23*'# 4TT 23*'# 4TT 23*' 3T@ 4TT 23*'# 4TT 23*'# 4TT 23*' 3T@ 74<R 4** 23*' 74<R P<RP4&. W04 74<R 4** 23*' 74<R P<RP4&. W04 4TT 23*'# 4TT 23*' 3T 4TT 23*'# 4TT 23*' 3T 74<R 4** 23*' 74<R P<RP4&@ W04 74<R 4** 23*' 74<R P<RP4&@ W04 4TT 23*'# 4TT 23*' 4TT 23*'# 4TT 23*' C.E. C.E.

[ticks *ead out of window$ [ticks *ead out of window$

My p$rpo"e in life i" to help people find the-"ele". My p$rpo"e in life i" to help people find the-"ele".

BRIAN BRIAN

[ticks *ead out of window$ [ticks *ead out of window$

My p$rpo"e in life i" to -a+e people la$gh... and -a+e

My p$rpo"e in life i" to -a+e people la$gh... and -a+e -oney doing it@-oney doing it@

GARY GARY

[ticks *ead out of window$ [ticks *ead out of window$ My greate"t fear i" that 3e

My greate"t fear i" that 3e already achieed -y da-n p$rpo"e in life# and fro-already achieed -y da-n p$rpo"e in life# and fro-then on 3e been on a "lo6# tire"o-e 6al+ to the grae.

then on 3e been on a "lo6# tire"o-e 6al+ to the grae. ['"! enters&$ ['"! enters&$ PRINCETON PRINCETON 0ey# !ate@ 0ey# !ate@ KATE KATE Princeton@ 0i@ Princeton@ 0i@ PRINCETON PRINCETON

&ay# !ate# can 3 a"+ yo$ a $e"tionA &ay# !ate# can 3 a"+ yo$ a $e"tionA

KATE KATE &$re. &$re. PRINCETON PRINCETON What" yo$r p$rpo"e in lifeA What" yo$r p$rpo"e in lifeA

KATE KATE

4h. Well# 3- a !indergarten teaching a""i"tant. 4h. Well# 3- a !indergarten teaching a""i"tant.

PRINCETON PRINCETON

Right. B$t 6hat" yo$r p$rpo"e# yo$r drea-# yo$r -i""ionA Right. B$t 6hat" yo$r p$rpo"e# yo$r drea-# yo$r -i""ionA

KATE KATE

 *obody eer 6ant" to +no6 that.  *obody eer 6ant" to +no6 that.

PRINCETON PRINCETON 3 do. 3 do. KATE KATE

Well# "ince yo$ a"+ed... no# 3 cant@ 3 barely +no6 yo$. Well# "ince yo$ a"+ed... no# 3 cant@ 3 barely +no6 yo$.

PRINCETON PRINCETON 6# co-e on@ 6# co-e on@ KATE KATE

4+ay. When 3 6a" a little -on"ter# 3 al6ay" 6i"hed 3 had a

4+ay. When 3 6a" a little -on"ter# 3 al6ay" 6i"hed 3 had a "pecial place 3 co$ld go."pecial place 3 co$ld go.  "pecial "chool only for -on"ter". &$re it" i-portant to learn abo$t the great  "pecial "chool only for -on"ter". &$re it" i-portant to learn abo$t the great fig$re" of We"tern ciilization

fig$re" of We"tern ciilization# b$t "o -$ch of the canon leae" # b$t "o -$ch of the canon leae" o$t -on"ter art ando$t -on"ter art and hi"tory@ nd 6e a" a nation are poorer for it. 3t 6a"

hi"tory@ nd 6e a" a nation are poorer for it. 3t 6a" al6ay" -y drea- to "tart thatal6ay" -y drea- to "tart that "pecial "chool for -on"ter". &o that# in "hort# i" -y p$rpo

"pecial "chool for -on"ter". &o that# in "hort# i" -y p$rpo"e. "e. <h# b$t 3- not an<h# b$t 3- not an egghead. 3 li+e to hae f$n and :party;.

PRINCETON PRINCETON

4h. &o# $h# yo$re leel on the -on"ter "t$ffA 4h. &o# $h# yo$re leel on the -on"ter "t$ffA

KATE KATE <h8h$h. <h8h$h. PRINCETON PRINCETON

h. Well# yo$ +no6 Tre++ie Mon"ter $p"tair"A h. Well# yo$ +no6 Tre++ie Mon"ter $p"tair"A

KATE KATE <h h$h. <h h$h. P)"n#e*on P)"n#e*on

Well# he" Tre++ie Mon"ter# and yo$re !ate Mon"ter  Well# he" Tre++ie Mon"ter# and yo$re !ate Mon"ter 

KATE KATE Right. Right. PRINCETON PRINCETON 7o$re both -on"ter". 7o$re both -on"ter".

KATE KATE 7eah. 7eah. PRINCETON PRINCETON re yo$ t6o relatedA re yo$ t6o relatedA

KATE KATE

WhatA@ Princeton# 3- "$rpri"ed at yo$@ 3 find that raci"t@ WhatA@ Princeton# 3- "$rpri"ed at yo$@ 3 find that raci"t@

PRINCETON PRINCETON 3- "orry@ 3 6a" F$"t a"+ing@ 3- "orry@ 3 6a" F$"t a"+ing@

KATE KATE Well it

Well it" a to$chy "$bFect. *o# not all Mon"ter" are related. " a to$chy "$bFect. *o# not all Mon"ter" are related. What are yo$ tryingWhat are yo$ trying "ay# h$hA That 6e all loo+ the "a-e to yo$A 0$h# h$h# h$hA

"ay# h$hA That 6e all loo+ the "a-e to yo$A 0$h# h$h# h$hA

PRINCETON PRINCETON  *o# no# no# not at all@ 3- "orry

 *o# no# no# not at all@ 3- "orry# 3 g$e"" that 6a" a little raci"t.# 3 g$e"" that 6a" a little raci"t.

KATE KATE

3 "ho$ld "ay "o.

3 "ho$ld "ay "o. 7o7o$ "ho$ld be -$ch -$ "ho$ld be -$ch - ore caref$l 6hen ore caref$l 6hen yo$re tal+ing abo$t theyo$re tal+ing abo$t the "en"itie "$bFect of race.

"en"itie "$bFect of race. PRINCETON PRINCETON Well loo+ 6ho" tal+ing@ Well loo+ 6ho" tal+ing@

KATE KATE What do yo$ -eanA What do yo$ -eanA

PRINCETON PRINCETON

What abo$t that "pecial Mon"ter &chool yo$ told -e abo$tA What abo$t that "pecial Mon"ter &chool yo$ told -e abo$tA

KATE KATE What abo$t itA What abo$t itA

PRINCETON PRINCETON ,o$ld "o-eone li+e -e go thereA ,o$ld "o-eone li+e -e go thereA

KATE KATE

 *o# 6e dont 6ant people li+e yo$.  *o# 6e dont 6ant people li+e yo$. [gasps$[gasps$

PRINCETON PRINCETON 7o$ "eeA@ 7o$ "eeA@ 74<R  L3TTL B3T R,3&T. 74<R  L3TTL B3T R,3&T. KATE KATE WLL# 74<R  L3TTL B3T T44. WLL# 74<R  L3TTL B3T T44. PRINCETON PRINCETON 3 <&& WR B4T0  L3TTL B3T R,3&T. 3 <&& WR B4T0  L3TTL B3T R,3&T. KATE KATE 'M3TT3* 3T 3& *4T * &7 T03* 'M3TT3* 3T 3& *4T * &7 T03* T4 '4...T4 '4... PRINCETON PRINCETON B<T 3 <&& 3T& TR<. B<T 3 <&& 3T& TR<. KATE KATE BTW* M *' 74<# 3 T03*!  BTW* M *' 74<# 3 T03*!  BOTH BOTH 1R74*&  L3TTL

'4&*T M* W 4 R4<*' ,

'4&*T M* W 4 R4<*' , 4MM3TT3* 0T4MM3TT3* 0T ,R3M&. ,R3M&. L44! R4<*' *' 74< W3LL 23*' L44! R4<*' *' 74< W3LL 23*'  *4 4*& RLL7  *4 4*& RLL7 ,4L4R BL3*'.,4L4R BL3*'. M7B 3T&  2,T W LL &04<L' 2, M7B 3T&  2,T W LL &04<L' 2, 1R74* M!& J<'M*T& B&' 4* R,. 1R74* M!& J<'M*T& B&' 4* R,.

PRINCETON PRINCETON

 *o6 not big F$dg-ent"# li+e 6ho to

 *o6 not big F$dg-ent"# li+e 6ho to hire or 6ho to b$y a ne6"paper fro-.hire or 6ho to b$y a ne6"paper fro-. KATE KATE  *o@  *o@ PRINCETON PRINCETON

 *o# F$"t little F$dg-ent" li+e thin+

 *o# F$"t little F$dg-ent" li+e thin+ing that Mexican b$"boying that Mexican b$"boy" "ho$ld learn to "pea+" "ho$ld learn to "pea+ godda-n ngli"h@ godda-n ngli"h@ KATE KATE Right@ Right@ BOTH BOTH 1R74*&  L3TTL B3T R,3&T T4'7. 1R74*&  L3TTL B3T R,3&T T4'7. &4# 1R74*&  L3TTL B3T R,3&T# 4!7@ &4# 1R74*&  L3TTL B3T R,3&T# 4!7@ T03*3, J4!& M30T B <*,4<T0# T03*3, J4!& M30T B <*,4<T0#

B<T 74< L<0 B,<& T07R B&' 4* TR<T0. B<T 74< L<0 B,<& T07R B&' 4* TR<T0. '4*T T! T0M & PR&4*L TT,!&.

'4*T T! T0M & PR&4*L TT,!&. 1R74* *J47& T0M 8 &4 RL@ 1R74* *J47& T0M 8 &4 RL@

PRINCETON PRINCETON

ll right# "top -e if yo$e heard thi" one. ll right# "top -e if yo$e heard thi" one.

KATE KATE 4+ay@ 4+ay@ PRINCETON PRINCETON

Thi" plane i" going do6n and there" only one parach$te# and there" a Thi" plane i" going do6n and there" only one parach$te# and there" a rabbi# arabbi# a  prie"t  prie"t KATE KATE nd a BL,! nd a BL,! g$y@g$y@ GARY GARY [!ntering$

[!ntering$ Whatchoo tal+in bo$t !ateAWhatchoo tal+in bo$t !ateA

KATE KATE <h... <h... GARY GARY 7o

7o$ 6ere telling a $ 6ere telling a blac+ Fo+e@blac+ Fo+e@

PRINCETON PRINCETON

Well# "$re# ary# b$t lot" of people tell

Well# "$re# ary# b$t lot" of people tell blac+ Fo+e"...blac+ Fo+e"...

GARY GARY 3 dont. 3 dont. PRINCETON PRINCETON

Well# of co$r"e yo$ dont 8 yo$re blac+@ B$t 3 bet yo$ tell Polac+ Fo+e"# rightA Well# of co$r"e yo$ dont 8 yo$re blac+@ B$t 3 bet yo$ tell Polac+ Fo+e"# rightA

GARY GARY Well# "$re 3 do. 0aha.

Well# "$re 3 do. 0aha. Tho"e "t$pid Polac+"@Tho"e "t$pid Polac+"@

PRINCETON PRINCETON  *o6# dont y

 *o6# dont yo$ thin+ that" a little raci"tAo$ thin+ that" a little raci"tA GARY

GARY

Well# da-n# 3 g$e"" yo$re right. Well# da-n# 3 g$e"" yo$re right.

KATE KATE 74<R  L3TTL B3T R,3&T. 74<R  L3TTL B3T R,3&T. GARY GARY WLL# 74<R  L3TTL B3T T44. WLL# 74<R  L3TTL B3T T44. PRINCETON PRINCETON WR LL  L3TTL B3T WR LL  L3TTL B3T R,3&T.R,3&T. GARY GARY 3 T03*! T0T 3 W4<L' 01 T4 R W3T0 74<. 3 T03*! T0T 3 W4<L' 01 T4 R W3T0 74<. PRINCETONKATE PRINCETONKATE WR L' 74< '4. WR L' 74< '4.

GARY GARY 3T& &' B<T TR<@ 3T& &' B<T TR<@ 1R74*&  L3TTL

1R74*&  L3TTL B3T  B3T R,3&T 8R,3&T 8 ll right@ ll right@ KATE KATE ll right@ ll right@ PRINCETON PRINCETON ll right@ ll right@ GARY GARY ll right@ ll right@ B34TR7 0& *1R

B34TR7 0& *1R B* ,L<&31L7 W03TB* ,L<&31L7 W03T

ALL ALL 32 W LL ,4<L' J 32 W LL ,4<L' J <&T 'M3T<&T 'M3T T0T W R R,3&T  L3TTL B3T# T0T W R R,3&T  L3TTL B3T# 1* T04<0 W LL !*4W 1* T04<0 W LL !*4W T0T 3T0T 3T& WR4*#T& WR4*# M7 M7B 3T W4<L' B 3T W4<L' 0LP <& T L4*.0LP <& T L4*. PRINCETON PRINCETON ,hri"t do 3 feel good@ ,hri"t do 3 feel good@

GARY GARY

 *o6 there 6a" a fine $p"tanding blac+ -an.  *o6 there 6a" a fine $p"tanding blac+ -an.

PRINCETON PRINCETON WhoA WhoA GARY GARY Je"$" ,hri"t. Je"$" ,hri"t. KATE KATE

B$t# ary# Je"$" 6a" 6hite. B$t# ary# Je"$" 6a" 6hite.

GARY GARY  *o# Je"$" 6a" blac+.  *o# Je"$" 6a" blac+.

KATE KATE

 *o# Je"$" 6a" 6hite@  *o# Je"$" 6a" 6hite@

GARY GARY

3- pretty "$re that Je"$" 6a" 3- pretty "$re that Je"$" 6a" blac+@blac+@

PRINCETON PRINCETON $y"# g$y"... Je"$" 6a" Je6i"h@

$y"# g$y"... Je"$" 6a" Je6i"h@ [!.erybody laug*s$[!.erybody laug*s$ [BRI enters$

[BRI enters$

BRIAN BRIAN

0ey# 6hat are yo$ g$y" la$ghing abo$tA 0ey# 6hat are yo$ g$y" la$ghing abo$tA

GARY GARY Raci"-@ Raci"-@ BRIAN BRIAN ,ool. ,ool. [C&!& enters$ [C&!& enters$ C.E. C.E.

BL3*@ 7o$ co-e bac+ee here@

BL3*@ 7o$ co-e bac+ee here@ 7o7o$ ta+e $ ta+e o$t lecyc$rab$r"@o$t lecyc$rab$r"@

PRINCETON PRINCETON What" that -eanA What" that -eanA BRIAN BRIAN <gh. recyclable".

<gh. recyclable". [!.erybody laug*s$[!.erybody laug*s$ 0ey# dont la$gh at her@ 0o6 -any0ey# dont la$gh at her@ 0o6 -any lang$age" do yo$ "pea+A

lang$age" do yo$ "pea+A KATE KATE 4h# co-e off it# Brian@ 4h# co-e off it# Brian@

1R74*&  L3TTL B3T R,3&T. 1R74*&  L3TTL B3T R,3&T. BRIAN BRIAN 3- not@ 3- not@ PRINCETON PRINCETON 4h noA 4h noA

BRIAN BRIAN  *ope@  *ope@ 04W M*7 4R3*TL W31& 01 74< 4TA 04W M*7 4R3*TL W31& 01 74< 4TA C.E. C.E. WhatA Blian@ WhatA Blian@ PRINCETON PRINCETON BR3*# B<''7# W0R 74< B*A BR3*# B<''7# W0R 74< B*A T0 TRM 3& &3*8MR3,*@ T0 TRM 3& &3*8MR3,*@ C.E. C.E. 3 !*4W 74< R *4 3*T*'3* T4 B 3 !*4W 74< R *4 3*T*'3* T4 B B<T ,4RR3* M :4L3*TR; 422*&31 T4 M@ B<T ,4RR3* M :4L3*TR; 422*&31 T4 M@ BRIAN BRIAN

3- "orry# honey# 3 loe yo$. 3- "orry# honey# 3 loe yo$.

C.E. C.E. nd 3 loe yo$. nd 3 loe yo$. BRIAN BRIAN B$t yo$re raci"t# too. B$t yo$re raci"t# too.

C.E. C.E. 7e"# 3 +no6. 7e"# 3 +no6. T0 JW& 01 LL T0 M4*7 T0 JW& 01 LL T0 M4*7 *' T0 W03T& 01 LL T0 P4WR. *' T0 W03T& 01 LL T0 P4WR. *' 3M LW7& 3* T38,B *' 3M LW7& 3* T38,B W3T0 'L31R W04 *4 &04WR@ W3T0 'L31R W04 *4 &04WR@ PRINCETON PRINCETON Me too@ Me too@ KATE KATE Me too@ Me too@ GARY GARY 3 cant een T a taxi@ 3 cant een T a taxi@

ALL ALL

1R74*&  L3TTL

1R74*&  L3TTL B3T  B3T R,3&T# 3T& TR<.R,3&T# 3T& TR<. B<T 1R74* 3& J<&T B4<T &

B<T 1R74* 3& J<&T B4<T & R,3&T & 74<@R,3&T & 74<@ 32 W LL ,4<L' J 32 W LL ,4<L' J <&T 'M3T<&T 'M3T T0T W R R,3&T  L3TTL B3T# T0T W R R,3&T  L3TTL B3T# *' 1R74* &T4PP' B3* &4 P, *' 1R74* &T4PP' B3* &4 P, M7B M7B W ,4<L'  W ,4<L' L31 3* 0RM4*7@L31 3* 0RM4*7@ C.E. C.E.

lyone" a ritter bit laci"t@ lyone" a ritter bit laci"t@ [ll e%it e%cept PRIC!"O$ [ll e%it e%cept PRIC!"O$

PRINCETON PRINCETON Tod

Today 3 feel li+e 3- ay 3 feel li+e 3- getting clo"er to -y p$rpo"e@getting clo"er to -y p$rpo"e@ CHORS O3 KIDS -ON VIDEO CHORS O3 KIDS -ON VIDEO &chool cro""ing g$ard@

&chool cro""ing g$ard@

PRINCETON PRINCETON  *o# that" not -e.  *o# that" not -e.

KIDS KIDS Bea$ty "alon technician@ Bea$ty "alon technician@ PRINCETON PRINCETON  *ot $ite it.

 *ot $ite it.

KIDS KIDS Birthday party clo6n@ Birthday party clo6n@

PRINCETON PRINCETON

,lo"er 5 b$t "till no. Wait a -in$te@ 3t" right here in the corner of -y -ind. M ,lo"er 5 b$t "till no. Wait a -in$te@ 3t" right here in the corner of -y -ind. M yy  p$rpo"e. 3t"... it"...  p$rpo"e. 3t"... it"... ["1! B!R enter$ ["1! B!R enter$ THE BEARS THE BEARS 0ey Princeton@ 0ey Princeton@

BEAR 42 BEAR 42 3t" $"@ 3t" $"@ PRINCETON PRINCETON Who are yo$A

Who are yo$A

THE BEARS THE BEARS The Bad 3dea Bear"@ The Bad 3dea Bear"@ BEAR 42 BEAR 42 Were yo$r friend"@ Were yo$r friend"@ BEAR 41 BEAR 41 Where yo$ goingA Where yo$ goingA

PRINCETON PRINCETON 4h# 6ell# 3- al-o"t bro+e# "o

4h# 6ell# 3- al-o"t bro+e# "o 3- going to go loo+ for a Fob till 3 find -y p$rpo"e.3- going to go loo+ for a Fob till 3 find -y p$rpo"e. BEAR 41 BEAR 41 4h. 4h. BEAR 42 BEAR 42

'id yo$ chec+ the -e""age" on yo$r phoneA 'id yo$ chec+ the -e""age" on yo$r phoneA

PRINCETON PRINCETON Well# yeah. Well# yeah. BEAR 42 BEAR 42

Then yo$e got plenty of -oney@ Then yo$e got plenty of -oney@

BEAR 41 BEAR 41 7o$ "ho$ld celebrate@ 7o$ "ho$ld celebrate@

BEAR 42 BEAR 42 7o

7o$ need to do $ need to do "o-ething for 74<. B$y "o-e "o-ething for 74<. B$y "o-e beer@beer@ BEAR 41

BEAR 41 7eah@ B$y "o-e beer. 7eah@ B$y "o-e beer.

PRINCETON PRINCETON Well... 6ell# gee. 3 "ho$ldnt be

Well... 6ell# gee. 3 "ho$ldnt be "pending -y parent" -oney on "pending -y parent" -oney on beer.beer.

BEAR 41 BEAR 41 4h. 4+ay 4h. 4+ay BEAR 42 BEAR 42 That -a+e" -e "ad#

That -a+e" -e "ad# thin+ing abo$t yo$ not haing any f$n.thin+ing abo$t yo$ not haing any f$n.

BEAR 41 BEAR 41 3- gonna cry@ 3- gonna cry@ BEAR 42 BEAR 42

o"h# 3- "ad@ &o-e day" 3 6i"h 3 6a" dead. o"h# 3- "ad@ &o-e day" 3 6i"h 3 6a" dead. ["1! B!R cry noisily$

["1! B!R cry noisily$ PRINCETON PRINCETON

0ey# yo$ +no6# -aybe 3 co$ld afford a "ix8pac+. 0ey# yo$ +no6# -aybe 3 co$ld afford a "ix8pac+.

THE BEARS THE BEARS 77@@ 77@@ BEAR 42 BEAR 42 Why not a ca"eA Why not a ca"eA

BEAR 41 BEAR 41 7eah# a ca"e of beer@ 7eah# a ca"e of beer@

PRINCETON PRINCETON  *o# 3 cant get a ca"e@  *o# 3 cant get a ca"e@

BEAR 42 BEAR 42 B$t yo$re on a b$dget. B$t yo$re on a b$dget. BEAR 41 BEAR 41 7o

7o$re 6a"ting -oney in $re 6a"ting -oney in the long r$n if the long r$n if yo$ dont b$y in b$l+.yo$ dont b$y in b$l+.

PRINCETON PRINCETON

Woah# yo$re right@ Than+" g$y"# 3ll get a Woah# yo$re right@ Than+" g$y"# 3ll get a ca"e.ca"e.

THE BEARS THE BEARS

77@@ &ee yo$ aro$nd# Princeton@ 77@@ &ee yo$ aro$nd# Princeton@ ["*e "1! B!R start to lea.e# giggling$ ["*e "1! B!R start to lea.e# giggling$

PRINCETON PRINCETON &ee yo$ aro$nd# g$y"@

&ee yo$ aro$nd# g$y"@ ["1! B!R e%it$["1! B!R e%it$ o"h# theyre a6f$lly c$te. 3t" good to o"h# theyre a6f$lly c$te. 3t" good to +no6 3- -a+ing friend" 6ho hae -y be"t intere"t" at

+no6 3- -a+ing friend" 6ho hae -y be"t intere"t" at heart@heart@

ACT 1, SCENE  – Avenue Q ACT 1, SCENE  – Avenue Q [ p*one rings& Lig*ts co-e

[ p*one rings& Lig*ts co-e up to re.eal '"! MO"!R$up to re.eal '"! MO"!R$ KATE KATE 0elloA 0elloA MRS. THISTLET5AT MRS. THISTLET5AT

0ello# !atherine. Thi" i" yo$r e-ployer calling. 0ello# !atherine. Thi" i" yo$r e-ployer calling.

KATE KATE 0i Mr". Thi"tlet6at@ 0i Mr". Thi"tlet6at@ THISTLET5AT THISTLET5AT

" yo$ -ay +no6# 3 hae an appoint-ent for heart replace-ent "$rgery next 6ee+ " yo$ -ay +no6# 3 hae an appoint-ent for heart replace-ent "$rgery next 6ee+ and 3 need yo$ to teach -y cla""

and 3 need yo$ to teach -y cla"" in the -orning. 3 6ill probably need $ntil o$rin the -orning. 3 6ill probably need $ntil o$r l$nch brea+ to recoer.

l$nch brea+ to recoer. KATE KATE 3 get to teach all by -3 get to teach all by - y&#-34;elfAy"elfA

THISTLET5AT THISTLET5AT

3 tr$"t yo$# !atherine. nd yo$ -ay choo"e the "$bFect. 3 tr$"t yo$# !atherine. nd yo$ -ay choo"e the "$bFect.

KATE KATE Wo6@ Than+"# Lainia@ Wo6@ Than+"# Lainia@

THISTLET5AT THISTLET5AT !atherine# 6hen yo$ call e by

-!atherine# 6hen yo$ call -e by - y fir"t na-e the children dont re"pect it.y fir"t na-e the children dont re"pect it.

KATE KATE &orry Mr". Thi"tlet6at. &orry Mr". Thi"tlet6at. THISTLET5AT THISTLET5AT Than+ yo$. Than+ yo$. KATE KATE

2inally@ 3 get to teach an entire le""on by

2inally@ 3 get to teach an entire le""on by -y"elf. nd 3- going to teach "o-ething-y"elf. nd 3- going to teach "o-ething releant# "o-ething -odern... the 3nternet@

releant# "o-ething -odern... the 3nternet@

T0 3*TR*T 3& RLL7 RLL7 RT. T0 3*TR*T 3& RLL7 RLL7 RT.

TREKKIE TREKKIE

["R!''I! sticks *is *ead out of a window$

["R!''I! sticks *is *ead out of a window$  24R P4R*@ 24R P4R*@ KATE KATE 3 4T  2&T ,4**,T34*# &4 3 '4*T 01 T4 W3T. 3 4T  2&T ,4**,T34*# &4 3 '4*T 01 T4 W3T. TREKKIE TREKKIE 24R P4R*@ 24R P4R*@ KATE KATE

T0R& LW7& &4M *W &3T. T0R& LW7& &4M *W &3T.

TREKKIE TREKKIE 24R P4R*@ 24R P4R*@ KATE KATE 3 BR4W& LL '7 *' *30T. 3 BR4W& LL '7 *' *30T. TREKKIE TREKKIE 24R P4R*@ 24R P4R*@ KATE KATE 3T& L3! 3M

3T& L3! 3M &<R23* T T&<R23* T T0 &P' 0 &P' 42 L30T.42 L30T.

TREKKIE TREKKIE 24R P4R*@ 24R P4R*@ KATE KATE Tre++ie@ Tre++ie@ TREKKIE TREKKIE T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R*. T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R*. KATE KATE Tre++ie@ Tre++ie@ TREKKIE TREKKIE T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R* T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R* KATE KATE What are yo$ doingA@ What are yo$ doingA@ TREKKIE TREKKIE

W07 74< T03*! T0

W07 74< T03*! T0 *T W*T W& B4R*A& B4R*A P4R*@ P4R*@ P4R*@

P4R*@ P4R*@ P4R*@ KATE KATE

Tre++ie Mon"ter# get do6n here@ Tre++ie Mon"ter# get do6n here@

TREKKIE TREKKIE 0ello !ate Mon"terrrr@ 0ello !ate Mon"terrrr@

KATE KATE 7o$ are r$ining -y "ong. 7o$ are r$ining -y "ong.

TREKKIE TREKKIE 4h# -e "orry. Me no -ean to. 4h# -e "orry. Me no -ean to.

KATE KATE

Well if yo$ 6o$ldnt -ind plea"e being $iet for a -in$te "o 3 co$ld fini"hA Well if yo$ 6o$ldnt -ind plea"e being $iet for a -in$te "o 3 co$ld fini"hA

TREKKIE TREKKIE 4+ey8do+ey@ 4+ey8do+ey@ KATE KATE ood@ ood@ 3M L' W 01 T03& *W T,0*4L47. 3M L' W 01 T03& *W T,0*4L47. TREKKIE TREKKIE 24R P4R*. 24R P4R*. KATE KATE W03,0 31&

W03,0 31& <& <*T4L' 4PP4RT<*3T7.<& <*T4L' 4PP4RT<*3T7. TREKKIE TREKKIE 24R P4R*. 24R P4R*. 4h# "orry@ 4h# "orry@ KATE KATE R30T 2R4M 74<R 4W* '&!T4P R30T 2R4M 74<R 4W* '&!T4P TREKKIE TREKKIE 24R... 24R... KATE KATE 74< ,* R&R,0#

<*T3L 74<1 0' *4<0 *' 74<R R'7 T4 &T4P@ <*T3L 74<1 0' *4<0 *' 74<R R'7 T4 &T4P@ TREKKIE TREKKIE 24R P4R*@ 24R P4R*@ KATE KATE Tre++ie@ Tre++ie@ TREKKIE TREKKIE T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R*. T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R*. KATE KATE  *oooo.  *oooo. TREKKIE TREKKIE T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R* T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R* KATE KATE Tre++ie@ Tre++ie@ TREKKIE TREKKIE M <P LL *30T 04*!3* M 04R* M <P LL *30T 04*!3* M 04R* T4T4 P4R*# P4R*# P4R*@ P4R*# P4R*# P4R*@ KATE KATE That" gro""@ 7o

That" gro""@ 7o$ are a $ are a perert@perert@ TREKKIE

TREKKIE

hh# "tic+" and "tone"# !ate Mon"ter. hh# "tic+" and "tone"# !ate Mon"ter.

KATE KATE  *o# really. 7

 *o# really. 7o$re a perert. *or-al people dono$re a perert. *or-al people dont "it ho-e all day and loo+ at pornt "it ho-e all day and loo+ at porn in the 3nternet. in the 3nternet. TREKKIE TREKKIE 4hhhhh... 4hhhhh... KATE KATE WhatA WhatA TREKKIE TREKKIE 7o$ hae noooo idea. 7o$ hae noooo idea. [calling offstage$

[calling offstage$  Ready# nor-al peopleA Ready# nor-al peopleA

[BRI# 4R,# RO+# and PRIC!"O stick t*eir *eads

[BRI# 4R,# RO+# and PRIC!"O stick t*eir *eads out of windows$out of windows$ BRIAN BRIAN Ready@ Ready@ GARY GARY Ready@ Ready@ ROD ROD Ready@ Ready@ TREKKIE TREKKIE Let -e hear it@ Let -e hear it@

GYS GYS T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R*. T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R*. PRINCETON PRINCETON &orry# !ate. &orry# !ate. GYS GYS T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R*. T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R*. PRINCETON PRINCETON 3 -a"t$rbate@ 3 -a"t$rbate@ TREKKIE TREKKIE

LL T0& <7& <*3P T03R 2L3& 24R  LL T0& <7& <*3P T03R 2L3& 24R 

GYS GYS P4R*@ P4R*@ P4R*@ P4R*@ P4R*@ P4R*@ KATE KATE

The 3nternet i" *4T for porn@ The 3nternet i" *4T for porn@

GYS GYS P4R*@ P4R*@ P4R*@ P4R*@

KATE KATE

0old on a "econd@ *o6# 3 happen to +no6 for a fact that yo$# Rod# chec+ 0old on a "econd@ *o6# 3 happen to +no6 for a fact that yo$# Rod# chec+ yo$ryo$r  portfolio and trade "toc+" onl

 portfolio and trade "toc+" online.ine. ROD ROD That" correct. That" correct. KATE KATE

nd Brian# yo$ b$y thing" on -azon.co-@ nd Brian# yo$ b$y thing" on -azon.co-@

BRIAN BRIAN &$re. &$re. KATE KATE

nd ary# yo$ +eep "elling yo$r po""e""ion" on eBa nd ary# yo$ +eep "elling yo$r po""e""ion" on eBa y@y@

GARY GARY 7e" 3 do. 7e" 3 do. KATE KATE

nd Princeton# yo$ "ent -e that "6eet online birthday card. nd Princeton# yo$ "ent -e that "6eet online birthday card.

PRINCETON PRINCETON Tr$e. Tr$e. TREKKIE TREKKIE B$t !ate... 6hat

B$t !ate... 6hat yo$ thin+ he do 2TRAyo$ thin+ he do 2TRA [PRIC!"O nods$ [PRIC!"O nods$ KATE KATE 666666@@ 666666@@ GYS GYS T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R*. T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R*. KATE KATE ro""@ ro""@ GYS GYS T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R*. T0 3*TR*T 3& 24R P4R*. KATE KATE 3 hate porn. 3 hate porn. TREKKIE TREKKIE RB 74<R '3,! *' '4<BL ,L3,! 24R  RB 74<R '3,! *' '4<BL ,L3,! 24R  GYS GYS P4R*@ P4R*@ P4R*@ P4R*@ P4R*@ P4R*@ KATE KATE 3 hate -en@ 3 hate -en@ GYS GYS P444R*@ P444R*@ P444R*@ P444R*@ P444R*@ P444R*@ KATE KATE 3- leaing@ 3- leaing@ GYS GYS P444R*@ P444R*@ P444R*@ P444R*@ P444R*@ P444R*@ KATE KATE 3 hate the 3nternet. 3 hate the 3nternet.

TREKKIE TREKKIE [C*anting$

[C*anting$ The internet i" for The internet i" for 

TREKKIE, ROD, !n PRINCETON TREKKIE, ROD, !n PRINCETON 3nternet i" for 

3nternet i" for 

GYS GYS 3nternet i" for P4R*@ 3nternet i" for P4R*@

ACT 1, SCENE 6 – Avenue Q, ou*'"e B)"!n 7 C8)"'*+!'

ACT 1, SCENE 6 – Avenue Q, ou*'"e B)"!n 7 C8)"'*+!' Eve&' !(!)*+en*Eve&' !(!)*+en* C.E.

C.E.

0ey# Rod@ 0o6 it hangingA 0ey# Rod@ 0o6 it hangingA

ROD ROD 0ello# ,hri"t-a" e@ 3

0ello# ,hri"t-a" e@ 3 got yo$r 6edding initation.got yo$r 6edding initation. C.E.

C.E. re yo$ co-ingA re yo$ co-ingA

ROD ROD Well# here" -y R&1P. Well# here" -y R&1P.

BRIAN BRIAN

[ticks *is *ead out of a window$ [ticks *is *ead out of a window$ 0ey# honey

0ey# honey# 6hat" all # 6hat" all thi" abo$t $" getting -arriedAthi" abo$t $" getting -arriedA C.E.

C.E. Thin+ of it li+e a

Thin+ of it li+e a "$rpri"e party."$rpri"e party. BRIAN

BRIAN ,ool@

,ool@ [Closes [Closes window&window&$$

ROD ROD 6

6# 3 thin+ it" # 3 thin+ it" 6onderf$l yo$ hae "o-eone "o 6onderf$l yo$ hae "o-eone "o "pecial in yo$r life."pecial in yo$r life. C.E.

C.E. re yo$ o+ay# RodA re yo$ o+ay# RodA

ROD ROD

,hri"t-a" e# yo$re a therapi"t# rightA ,hri"t-a" e# yo$re a therapi"t# rightA

C.E. C.E.

3 hae t6o -a"ter" degree". 3 hae t6o -a"ter" degree".

ROD ROD

&o yo$ help people 6ho hae all +ind" of proble-"A &o yo$ help people 6ho hae all +ind" of proble-"A

C.E. C.E.

 *obody 6ant to co-e to -e for helping

 *obody 6ant to co-e to -e for helping. 3 -eet 6ith people# 6e tal+ee for an ho$r#. 3 -eet 6ith people# 6e tal+ee for an ho$r# then they go a6ay and neer co-e bac+. 3

then they go a6ay and neer co-e bac+. 3 6onder 6hyA - 3 fixing the- in one6onder 6hyA - 3 fixing the- in one

appoint-entA Maybe 3 too efficient. Maybe 3 "ho$ld "pread -y helping o$t. Why appoint-entA Maybe 3 too efficient. Maybe 3 "ho$ld "pread -y helping o$t. Why RodA 'o yo$ need "o-e helpingA

RodA 'o yo$ need "o-e helpingA ROD

ROD Well# 3 hae thi" friend. Well# 3 hae thi" friend.

C.E. C.E.  *ic+yA  *ic+yA ROD ROD

 *o# no# another friend. n

 *o# no# another friend. nd 3 thin+ he ha" a ery big proble-. 3# $h# thin+ -yd 3 thin+ he ha" a ery big proble-. 3# $h# thin+ -y friend i"... he i"... gay.

friend i"... he i"... gay. C.E. C.E.

What 6rong 6ith thatA 7o$ +no6# Rod# gay people -a+e -aFor contrib$tion to art What 6rong 6ith thatA 7o$ +no6# Rod# gay people -a+e -aFor contrib$tion to art and philo"ophy and literat$re for -any

and philo"ophy and literat$re for -any h$ndred" of year" no6.h$ndred" of year" no6. ROD

ROD

B$t -y friend i"nt an arti"t. 0e"

B$t -y friend i"nt an arti"t. 0e" a Rep$blican. nd an ine"t-ent ban+er.a Rep$blican. nd an ine"t-ent ban+er.

C.E. C.E.

4h. Well tell hi- to "tay in

4h. Well tell hi- to "tay in clo"et then. 0e clo"et then. 0e good for nothing.good for nothing.

ROD ROD

4+ay# fine. Than+" for the adice. 4+ay# fine. Than+" for the adice.

C.E. C.E. [Laug*ing$

[Laug*ing$ 7e 7eah# 3 6o$ldnt 6ant ah# 3 6o$ldnt 6ant a friend li+e that@a friend li+e that@

ROD ROD [Laug*ing as well$

[Laug*ing as well$ *oooo. Than+" again@ By *oooo. Than+" again@ Bye@e@

C.E. C.E. Bye no6@ Bye no6@ [C1RI"M !2! e%its&$ [C1RI"M !2! e%its&$ ROD ROD &hit@ &hit@

ACT 1, SCENE 9 – K!*e&' !(!)*+en* ACT 1, SCENE 9 – K!*e&' !(!)*+en*

KATE KATE Princeton. Princeton. 0 L3!& M. 0 L3!& M. 3 T03*! 0 L3!& M. 3 T03*! 0 L3!& M. B<T '4& 0 L3! M 8 L3! B<T '4& 0 L3! M 8 L3! M#M# L3! 3 L3! 03MA L3! 3 L3! 03MA

W3LL W B 2R3*'&# 4R &4MT03* M4RA W3LL W B 2R3*'&# 4R &4MT03* M4RA 3 T03*! 0& 3*TR&T'# B<T 3M *4T &<R. 3 T03*! 0& 3*TR&T'# B<T 3M *4T &<R. [+oorbell$ [+oorbell$ ,o-e in@ ,o-e in@ [PRIC!"O enters&$ [PRIC!"O enters&$ PRINCETON PRINCETON 0iya# !ate@ 0iya# !ate@ KATE KATE Princeton@ 0i@ Princeton@ 0i@ PRINCETON PRINCETON

0i@ Li"ten# 3 6a" going thro$gh -y ,'" ye"terday# and 3 +ept co-ing acro"" "ong" 0i@ Li"ten# 3 6a" going thro$gh -y ,'" ye"terday# and 3 +ept co-ing acro"" "ong" 3 tho$ght yo$d li+e# "o 3 -ade yo$ thi" tape.

3 tho$ght yo$d li+e# "o 3 -ade yo$ thi" tape. [*ands '"! a tape$[*ands '"! a tape$

KATE KATE 6

6# that" "o "6e# that" "o "6e et@ ,an 3 et@ ,an 3 get yo$ a drin+# or get yo$ a drin+# or a "nac+# or...Aa "nac+# or...A

PRINCETON PRINCETON ct$ally# do yo$ -ind if 3 $"e

ct$ally# do yo$ -ind if 3 $"e yo$r bathroo-Ayo$r bathroo-A

KATE KATE 4h# "$re. o right ahead.

4h# "$re. o right ahead. [PRIC!"O e%its&$[PRIC!"O e%its&$

PRINCETON PRINCETON Than+". Than+".  M3 TP.  M3 TP. 0 M'  M3 TP. 0 M'  M3 TP. 0 W

0 W& T03*!3* 42 & T03*!3* 42 M# W03,0 &04W& 0 M# W03,0 &04W& 0 ,R&,R&

&4MT3M W0* &4M4* 0&  ,R<&0 4* 74< &4MT3M W0* &4M4* 0&  ,R<&0 4* 74< T07LL M! 74<  M3 TPT4 31 74<  ,L< T07LL M! 74<  M3 TPT4 31 74<  ,L< :74<1 4T  2R3*'#; :74<1 4T  2R3*'#; :T0 T0M 2R4M 2R3*'&#; :T0 T0M 2R4M 2R3*'&#; :T0T& W0T 2R3*'& R 24R.; :T0T& W0T 2R3*'& R 24R.; &hit. 4h# b$t loo+@ &hit. 4h# b$t loo+@ : W04L *W W4RL'#; : W04L *W W4RL'#; :!3&& T0 3RL#; :!3&& T0 3RL#; :M ,0R3 M4<R@; :M ,0R3 M4<R@; 6

666# Princeton... he doe" li+e 66# Princeton... he doe" li+e -e@-e@ :3 M T0 WLR<&#; :3 M T0 WLR<&#; :2T B4TT4M' 3RL&#; :2T B4TT4M' 3RL&#; :7LL4W &<MBR3*A; :7LL4W &<MBR3*A; W0T '4& T03& M*A W0T '4& T03& M*A

PRINCETON PRINCETON [!ntering$

[!ntering$ !ate# yo$ -ight not 6anna go in there for  !ate# yo$ -ight not 6anna go in there for a6hile.a6hile. KATE

KATE

4+ay. Princeton# than+ yo

4+ay. Princeton# than+ yo$ for thi" tape. 3 $ for thi" tape. 3 6a" F$"t loo+ing at "ide . reat "ong"@6a" F$"t loo+ing at "ide . reat "ong"@

PRINCETON PRINCETON 'id yo$ get to "ide B yetA 'id yo$ get to "ide B yetA

KATE KATE  *ot yet.  *ot yet. PRINCETON PRINCETON 4h# it" great. ,hec+ it o$t. 4h# it" great. ,hec+ it o$t.

KATE KATE :&T<,! 4* 74<#; :&T<,! 4* 74<#; PRINCETON PRINCETON :L41 M '4#; :L41 M '4#; KATE KATE :M7 0RT W3LL 4 4*.; :M7 0RT W3LL 4 4*.; 3 loed Titanic@ 3 loed Titanic@