First Published in Great Britain 2015
© Copyright Vinh Ly
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying recording or otherwise) without the prior written permission of the publisher.
This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, resold, hired out, or otherwise circulated without the publisher’s prior consent in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.
PRAISE
“What do I like about Vinh’s comics?The more obvious elements are that they are based on science and use cute octopus-like beings. But more than that, they not only illustrate the techniques but also compare them to the situations in which you would usually fail. That gives you a good clue as to when to be attentive so that you will not continue using the same standard protocol but apply the techniques you have learned instead.”
-- Katharina Rauhe, Communications at Scivity
“This is a book that should be studied rather than read. Take the time to immerse yourself in Foolproof Persuasion and you will be rewarded with dramatically improved persuasion skills.”
TABLE OF CONTENTS
About the author... 1
Introduction... 2
Foreword ... 2
Why use questions? ... 6
Questions can't be wrong ... 8
The persuasive process ... 12
Rapport building... 14
What’s your name? ... 14
Foot in the mouth ... 16
Active listening ... 19 Rapport-building questions ... 22 Promoting... 25 Repetition ... 25 Response scaling ... 28 Response ordering ... 31 Rhetorical questions ... 34 Tie-down questions ... 37 Yes ladder ... 40 Emotionally-loaded questions ... 43 Objection handling... 45 Socratic method ... 45 Five whys ... 49 Curved misdirection ... 52 Closing... 56 Double-bind questions ... 56 False choice ... 59 Demonstration close ... 63 Thermometer close ... 66
Compelling questions ... 69
Distracting questions ... 72
Practice... 74
Conclusion... 77
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Vinh Ly is a private jet marketing expert, who has launched and sold the most expensive marketing products in the world to billionaires. He is the bestselling author of Billion Dollar Influence, a persuasion skills masterclass by someone who sells private jets for a living. He is internationally acclaimed for his unique visual and fresh approach to teaching persuasion and influence to CEOs, students, sales professionals and individuals interested in being more influential. When he's not busy sharing on his blog, he enjoys improvisation comedy and meditation.
INTRODUCTION
Foreword
Congratulations!
You are taking steps to improve yourself.
Take a moment to enjoy this, you deserve it! Your investment will pay off for the rest of your life (with accrued interest). Which begs the question...
Before we start, I just wanted to remind you of something important about persuasion.
1.
Persuasion is making someone do something that you think will benefit them. That involves changing the way they think, feel and behave.2.
Manipulation is about making someone do something against their own interests.That may sound simplistic, and they may not be the definitions you find in the dictionary, but that's how I see it. And I believe that if you see persuasion this way, you will be much more congruent when you try to persuade someone to do something — because deeply, you are convinced that it benefits them.
I teach persuasion and I do it so that it benefits people, not to force them into buying something they can't afford.
Obviously, you could use those persuasion techniques to manipulate people, but that's for you to live with. And if you think long term, there's a negative impact that comes from
manipulating people, as your reputation will permanently suffer from the fact that you took advantage of somebody's temporary weakness.
Not to mention that once trust is broken, it takes a lifetime to mend.
What's this book about? Good question.
The book you have in front of you focuses solely on persuasive questioning.
It might look quite narrow as a subject to the outsider, but it is HUGE. And you will see that right now.
To help you get the most out of this book, you can download the mind map, and additional tips and techniques at
www.foolproofpersuasion.com/bonus
I have included a cheat sheet that lists all the questions and I also provide you with another fun and unusual way to practice them.
Why use questions?
Children ask a lot of questions. Why do we have nose hair?
Mommy, when did you know you loved me?
What happens when you throw a tomato at the sun?
These questions are about acquiring more knowledge, or simply about curiosity.
That is not what Foolproof Persuasion is about.
Foolproof persuasion is about questions which are at the heart of effective persuasion.
1.
They help build rapport2.
They help uncover information and understand someone’sneeds
3.
They help you engage the other person in the process, whileallowing you to check their level of interest
4.
They also help you closeWhen salesmen call you on the phone, they will often use questions because questions will force you to answer. That's why they are so hard to rub off when they are doing that.
human spam machine. That's just annoying.
And that’s not all…
Questions can't be wrong
One of the benefits of asking questions is that you'll minimize your chances of saying something wrong.
Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to speak with others without ever being wrong?
As the other person is more focused on answering than contradicting you’ll be able to direct the conversation with ease.
But wait! There's more!
Let me just talk about congruence first.
Congruence is the alignment between what we do and who we think we are. Carl Rogers introduced the concept of Congruence1 in the
1950's, expressing it as an alignment between experience and awareness.
It's an essential element that keeps us sane.
1 CARL R. ROGERS, Sigmund Koch. Psychology A Study Of A Science Volume 3
Formulations Of The Person And The Social Context. Mcgraw-Hill Book Company, Inc., 1959.
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In short, we need to feel that we are aligned between what we think and what we do.
The way we think influences our behavior and our behavior influences the way we think.
Because the questions will prompt answers, the other person is already in discussion with you.
Because they're already discussing it with you, it must be because they're interested in talking to you.
And the more you talk and show interest, the more rapport you are building...
Conclusion: To build rapport and be more persuasive, ask questions!
Remember this…
Questions are more memorable as they trigger “active mental processing”. People have to think about what you ask in order to answer your question.
One scientific experiment2 demonstrated the fact that questions
make your messages more memorable.
Children were shown 21 pairs of pictures of random objects with no obvious pairings. Each pair of objects was shown consecutively. For example, a shoe was shown next to a bar of soap, then a chair with an elephant.
If children were just looking at the items, the results were that there was an average recall of 1 pairing out of 21.
That’s really low.
But if children were asked questions like “Why is the bar of soap in the shoe?” or “Why would someone store the shoe and the soap together?” they would manage to remember an average of 16 items out of 21.
That means that questions can make your messages 16 times more memorable!
2 [Turnure, Buium & Thurlow, 1976]
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The persuasive process
Here's a quick reminder of the persuasion framework.
1.
Rapport building (build connection and authority)2.
Promoting (show how great your product is)3.
Objection handling (deal with resistance)4.
Closing (get the deal)5.
Post sales (don't screw up) Keep in mind The description might be sales-oriented, but it works in
the general persuasion context.
It's not an absolute process ... it's more something you
The expert persuader will be able to adapt to the other
person.
The book is built so that for each part of the process, you will find several types of questions.
RAPPORT BUILDING
What’s your name?
This one's pretty simple.
The question is “What's your name?”
Pay attention to the answer.
the first five minutes. You’ll remember it and you’ll make sure you pronounce it correctly.
Using the first name shows the other person that you care and this will make every question and statement more personal to them.
Why does this work?
We’re hardwired from birth to respond when we hear our name. And the first people to use it were our parents who, as authority figures, expected you to answer.
Bonus tip
Use their names with your questions. Whether it’s at the beginning, in the middle or at the end of the question, it’s a good attention booster.
Foot in the mouth
Here's a quick tip that you can use easily. The foot in the mouth technique is a typical telemarketing trick to steal a few minutes of someone’s time.
According to a social psychology experiment3 that proved the 3 Howard, Daniel J. “The Influence of Verbal Responses to Common Greetings on
Compliance Behavior: The Foot-in-the-Mouth Effect.” Journal of Applied Social Psychology 20, no. 14, Pt 2 (1990)
effectiveness of this technique, you should:
Ask someone how they feel Have them verbally respond Acknowledge that response
The experiment saw a significant improvement in people accepting to agree to a charitable request after the foot-in-the-mouth technique. This is one of the easiest ways to start the rapport-building loop that was described earlier in this book.
Examples
Before asking your request, just ask a small question to put the persuader at ease or to make sure that you have the time to defend your case.
Such questions could be:
Those are very civil questions to ask, so you don't risk much. But the payoff is that you'll have somebody who will be much more inclined to talk to you.
This is different from the foot in the door, which asks you for a low-cost action to follow-up with a higher cost action.
Very important
Wait and acknowledge the answer to your foot-in-the-mouth question.
Active listening
Have you ever had the feeling that your conversation turned into an interview because you kept asking questions to get the conversation going?
Or even worse, did you ever have the feeling you were performing a monologue for a disengaged audience?
Wait no more, and enjoy active listening!
Repeat what the other person said
Add a personal statement (about yourself) Ask a question
Active listening allows you to keep the conversation going. You will flow with ease from one topic to another until you find one that sticks. It is a wonderful tool to build rapport.
Repetition will show that you listen. You can keep the same phrasing or you can just repeat the general idea. The important thing is that the other person feels listened to.
Adding a personal statement will make it feel less of an interview. You are having a conversation so it should work both ways. It's about sharing.
A question prompts an answer. When you ask a question people feel compelled to answer, but the other reason is to help you move on to another topic.
Just start practicing, and you'll find out that your conversations will be flowing smoothly.
Rapport-building questions
Everybody has a sweet spot.
Sometimes it feels like trying to crack the code to a safe.
Stuck during small talk? Ask questions about the three general categories.
1.
Family2.
Work3.
HobbiesIn general, people have things in life they could talk about for hours.
When you've hit the right button, they won’t let you go… especially if you show genuine interest and curiosity in what they do.
eyes light up and they will always welcome your questions because you're making them talk about something they LOVE.
If they’ve just had a baby, they won't stop talking about it. If you have a golf fanatic, then prepare to hear about their new driver.
Observe the other person and look for cues.
And you don't need to be an expert about anything, curiosity is just enough. They will love explaining everything you want to know about their passion.
A good way to start building rapport is to wear a ‘whatsit’... Leil Lowndes4 describes the whatsit as something remarkable that
you wear, that anybody can use to start a conversation with you. If you wear cufflinks shaped like tennis rackets, then it's a good way to start building rapport with sports fans.
Warning
4 Lowndes, Leil. How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in
Relationships.McGraw-Hill, 2003.
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There's a high cultural factor to take into account.
For example, you never talk about money in France. This cultural trait comes from the French Revolution, where rich people were decapitated. Therefore, just don't talk about money in France. Conversely, it's not unusual for Vietnamese people to ask you about your salary a few minutes after meeting you.
PROMOTING
Repetition
Repetition increases the recall and persuasiveness of a simple message.
The DRY principle in persuasion is “Definitely Repeat Yourself”.
This is because when someone keeps hearing about something, it becomes familiar.
Did you know that the more a song is aired, the more successful it becomes?
How do you apply REPETITION to persuasion?
Focus on THE persuasive argument that will make your case with simple messages. As you spread your messages over time, you will gain more and more agreement.
Repetition is how you make sure that the other person remembers what you want them to know.
When you present to an audience…
1.
Tell them what you’re going to tell them2.
Tell them3.
Tell them what you told themIf you’re worried you might sound like a parrot, then…
1.
Say that you’re repeating this specific point because it is very important. It’s important for you, but also for them!2.
Smile. They will understand that it’s a game, and you’reshowing that you’re trying to say your main message as much as possible. The other person will just smile back. Humor is key.
3.
Use different deliveries of the same message (pitch, speed…).There’s nothing wrong with repeating yourself if you have fun with it…
“When you have a hammer, you see nails everywhere…”
Imagine that your main message is your hammer, and that you need to find ways to use it.
As you’re repeating your message more and more, your message will be firmly planted in the other person’s mind.
The first time you deliver your message, you can phrase it as a question so that it is easier to swallow.
Examples
1. Is this the most reliable product on the market?
2. Many elements show that this is the most reliable product on the market.
3. We have clearly assessed that this is the most reliable product on the market.
Response scaling
The response-scaling technique is amazingly simple to apply.
When asking a question that requires the other person to indicate an intensity or a quantity, you can easily influence them by giving examples of the expected answers.
How interested are you in purchasing a new car? A bit interested? Very interested?
This is not the double bind technique. The double bind technique reduces the possible answers to only two. The response-scaling technique influences the answers by implicitly limiting the range of the possible answers.
Formula
[Question]? [Example 1]? [Example 2]?
By providing those two examples or more, you automatically show your expectation to the other person in terms of the order of magnitude. And then social compliance just does the rest.
Response ordering
Here's how you can make sure people take the cheesecake (more value: more tips!)...
When you offer multiple choice, the order in which you present them is critical (although it's not 100% surefire).
If you give them three choices or more,
People will tend to select the last choice if you present
the alternatives verbally
People will tend to select the first choice if you present
the alternatives in written form
This might sound counterintuitive, but these two effects have been proven scientifically and studied in depth5.
Why does this technique work?
1.
VerballyWe have a limited short-term memory. We can't hold too many items in our memory for too long.
Because we have to make a choice, we will have the easiest access to the last item stored. Easy as one-two-three.
2.
WrittenThe process in place is slightly different when we talk about written choices. Short-term memory doesn't come into play as much.
What matters is the reference. The first choice is the reference. It is the ‘default choice’. All the other choices have to prove significantly better than this one to be selected. Changing one's mind is a lot more difficult once they’ve already made a decision.
And if there are too many choices, the person will be lazy and just take the first satisfying choice.
Bonus tip #1
When you present the choices verbally, you can improve the likelihood of the last choice to be selected by speeding up the overall delivery. It gives less time for the other person to process all the prior answers.
Bonus tip #2
This technique works very well if you use it with the response scaling technique. If you give choices, you might as well order them in a persuasive way, don't you think?
Rhetorical questions
Rhetorical questions are questions that you ask without expecting a formal answer.
1.
You ask your rhetorical question2.
The other person has to consider your question (and yourperspective)
3.
The person has to think of an answer — and there’s only oneanswer
When you are using a rhetorical question, you involve the other person in your argumentation.
Because the answer is obvious — negative or positive — the other person has to follow you in your reasoning. It is the logical equivalent of the emotionally leading questions.
As we already said, when you ask a question, you can't be contradicted. How can a question be wrong?
statement:
Some of them have lost a lot of their power over time and have become clichés.
In the persuasion context, you should highlight a fear or a benefit or ridicule any other alternative by asking obvious rhetorical questions.
Persuasion examples
It is a great tool for objection handling
How to counter rhetorical questions
A rhetorical question is just a question, so you can't argue. One funny way to counter a rhetorical question is to ask another rhetorical question.
Tie-down questions
You simply need to follow statements with tie-down questions such as:
Would you agree? Right?
Are you following me?
Do you think that makes sense?
As opposed to the rhetorical questions, the tie-downs are
actually prompting an answer... And while the
ladder technique’s sole purpose is to get people used to saying “yes”, the tie-downs are actually riskier as you're asking the other person to show some type of commitment (at least to an opinion).
Important
When they answer, they take ownership of your statement.
You've just started the Congruence Loop again! Because they started agreeing, they will agree more and more.
Examples
There are many ways in which you can use tie-down questions.
Summarizing the situation. It helps to recap all the elements that have been agreed beforehand to actually build on the positive items. “If I understand correctly, you want this project delivered by end of March and you came to see us because we have a good reputation — and especially for delivering on time. Is that correct?”
by the other person. “Carrots are very good for your health. Health is important for you, isn't it? ”
Nudging towards the close. It could be a full close, “I think we're good to go, right?" or a partial close, “If I manage to get a 10% discount, we'd have a deal, would you agree?”
Bonus tip #1
You need to be assertive, enthusiastic and confident when you use tie-down questions. Your goal when using tie-downs is to get
a “Yes“, because you want to integrate them into your yes ladder.
Bonus tip #2
If you nod during the tie-down, you increase your chances of the other person agreeing. You're actually using the mirroring technique.
Yes ladder
Here comes the infamous yes-ladder technique.
Get people to say “yes” Get them to say “yes” again
Close the deal with a final “yes”
It's that easy.
1.
Ask questions to get the other person more and more excited about the deal.2.
Make sure they will not answer “no” at any point.3.
Keep control of the flow.It works because the brain gets caught in a repetitive pattern that brings more and more compliance.
Bonus tip #1
Keep the questions easy. Those questions do not need to be product-related at first. They're just here to get the other person to say “yes”.
Good news! We've actually covered three techniques that allow you to do that easily!
1.
Foot-in-the-mouth technique2.
Rhetorical questions3.
Tie-down questions Typical first questions: Are you comfortably seated?
Do you have a few minutes for a chat?
Do you enjoy [XXXX]? (When they obviously enjoy [XXXX].) Bonus tip #2
1.
Use conditional questions to follow up if you think you risk a “no”.2.
Pre-empting objections by naming them works as well.3.
You can also focus on only the good features of your product.Examples
1. If this product performed as expected and price wasn't an issue, would you consider buying it?
2. I know you might not like the color, but do you agree that it's a useful product?
3. A three-year guarantee is pretty unbeatable, isn't it? Bonus tip #3
You don't need to close with the yes-ladder technique. Once you have raised the interest to a certain level, you could confirm the interest with an emotionally-leading question and close with a double-bind.
Wow... That's a lot of techniques.
Can you actually feel all the pieces of the puzzle starting to fit together?
If there are too many techniques to apply, just remember the core of the yes ladder.
Emotionally-loaded questions
In order to put someone in a specific state, one of the best ways is to ask an emotionally-loaded question.
When they are in the specific state, they will be more likely to be called to action (example: you buy more stuff at the supermarket when you are hungry than when you are full).
If you use the following sentence:
“Imagine you are excited about buying a banana."
Although it could work in specific circumstances, it sounds awkward.
However, directly asking a question forces the other person to go into the required state to answer the question.
Examples
Bonus tip
Asking to measure the level of the emotion might force the person to experience it more.
OBJECTION HANDLING
Socratic method
Socrates, the ancient Greek philosopher, was extremely well known for his questioning method.
His relentless questioning was used as a teaching method as well as a way to uncover the truth.
It was as if the idea was there all along and Socrates merely put it in plain sight.
If you want to use questions like Socrates, you can follow R.W. Paul's6 9 types of Socratic questions:
1.
Clarification6 The Thinker’s guide to the Art of Socratic Questioning By Dr. Richard Paul and Dr.
Linda Elder http://www.criticalthinking.org/TGS_files/SocraticQuestioning2006.pdf
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2.
Purpose3.
Assumption4.
Evidence5.
Perspective6.
Consequence7.
Question8.
Concept9.
Interpretation ExamplesOne way to see it is to visualize the overall process below.
A person works from their assumption, clarifies the current situation and works towards their purpose.
If you take some perspective from that situation, the assumptions will be proven by evidence, the concepts will be clearly identified from the current situation and the logical consequence will be assessed.
There is a duality between what the person interprets and how they can take perspective with your questioning.
This should help you find the root cause and treat it appropriately.
Warning
You need to be able to challenge your own assumptions. You won't persuade if you can't adapt.
Five whys
“Ask 'why' five times about every matter.”
-- Taiichi Ohno, Former Executive Vice President of Toyota Motor Corporation. March 2006
If you are trying to persuade someone without understanding what they need, chances are you are engaging in an unfruitful endeavor.
The 5 whys technique allows you to probe the other person to understand the root cause of any issue.
Define the issue
Ask “Why” as many times as you need to reach the real issue Propose a countermeasure (your solution)
The root analysis process often used in kaizen (continuous improvement) consists of asking the question why 5 times to find out what the real underlying issue is. You don't have to ask the question exactly 5 times ... it is just the empirical average. If it works for Toyota, who need to sell and produce 10 million cars per year, then it might be worth a try for you.
Bonus tip
This has the additional benefit of redefining the relationship. You are no longer a pushy salesperson, or an evil persuader... You are just a problem solver (and people will love you for that).
1.
Avoid the broken record technique. You want to introduce some variations using active listening.2.
Pinpoint a specific word by repeating it.3.
Acknowledge what the other person just said.4.
Add empathy by showing how you relate to the other person.5.
Stop when the other person agrees that you have found theBe curious about the other person, because it's always about the other person.
Curved misdirection
Handling objections with ‘curved’ misdirection
Imagine you're facing a customer questioning you on the quality of your products.
If you use obvious ‘straight’ misdirection you'll just look like you are trying to change the subject.
It's pretty lame. It's obvious and it won't work.
In order to use curved misdirection, you must add intermediate steps.
When the flow of the conversation is natural, you easily diverge from the initial point. Asking a question to the other person prompts them to answer and brings them to where you want them to be.
Make sure you start by acknowledging the point and then slowly drift to another one.
A word of caution
The use of this technique should be ethical. Even though misdirection comes naturally after a while, you might want to refrain from using it too much. If you keep avoiding an issue, it will come back to your face with full force. You don't want that. You want to confront an issue.
This technique can also help someone stuck on an issue to move on.
Use it. This works.
Did you know that this technique is actually very close to pickpocketing?
Let's take some time to discuss a little background.
If stealing somebody's wallet is an art form, then Apollo Robbins is clearly one of the few undisputed masters of the discipline. Pickpocketing is a branch of magic, and they share common principles.
During the Essential Magic Conference, Apollo managed to load every speaker with his business card. When he announced the
fact, everyone checked their pockets and found a business card lying in there. He was at such a level that he could even fool other magicians.
The secret to pickpocketing
Here's one thing that makes a complete difference, which is also a strong tool in the magician's toolset.
People say, “The hand is faster than the eye.” Wrong. Very wrong.
Everything happens when you're not looking. That's misdirection.
Pickpocketing is all about attention and focus management.
If people are busy looking at the pickpocket's gorgeous assistant, they will be less likely to see the hand reaching into their pockets.
If you look at the right hand, you will not see the left
hand.
If you look at the left hand, you will not see the right
hand.
If you look at both, then you're not really paying
attention to either.
So you're not a pickpocket? You can still use misdirection for persuasion!
scientists found out thanks to Apollo Robbins. What Apollo found out after years of pickpocketing
Apollo noticed that if his hand was moving from one point to another in a curved trajectory — instead of a straight movement — people would pay less attention to the initial position of the hand, which means that he would make curved moves after stealing a wallet so that people would see the hand and not think that it came from their pocket.
Neuroscientists have since confirmed7 what Apollo Robbins
naturally applied.
7 Otero-Millan, Jorge, Stephen L. Macknik, Apollo Robbins, and Susana Martinez-Conde.
“Stronger Misdirection in Curved than in Straight Motion.” Frontiers in Human Neuroscience 5 (November 21, 2011).
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CLOSING
Double-bind questions
Double binds give the illusion of choice, without really giving one.
It's a technique that I already described in Billion Dollar Influence, but it would be strange not to talk about this technique again since it's such a powerful one. It's actually the one technique that beginners like the most, since it is so
easy to understand and apply.
So what is the double-bind technique?
You frame your persuasion as a fake choice. This is a powerful method, as it might feel like the other person had a choice and therefore they will want to stay congruent.
The typical double bind is illustrated as follows:
While throwing a coin, you say, “Heads, I win; tails, you lose.” Either way you win.
In the persuasion context, you should work it out this way: 1. Understand what your outcome is
2. Give the other person two choices as to how they can achieve your outcome
The process works because the other person is led to think that their choice is how to achieve your outcome, not whether or not your outcome is beneficial for them. Furthermore, as you have stated only two choices, they will only focus on those choices instead of considering all the possibilities (such as running away while insulting you).
Be a choice architect.
Engineer the choices so that they all end up at the same general outcome. When talking to the other person, think this way: You have the choice to do anything you want, as long as you end up doing whatever I want.
Examples
Bonus tip
A good double bind does not make one choice too obvious compared to the other. It makes the choice a bit harder, and increases the blindness to the non-expressed choices.
False choice
We have already seen how the double bind works. You need to give two choices, the results of which are both in your favor.
We also know that choice is important, because you need to respect other people's freedom of choice so that you can use it to your advantage.
Now we will explore the false choice. Once again, you need to become a choice architect.
If you have an outcome in mind, you can frame it as a choice.
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This means that you can at least propose an alternative.
But if the alternative is unappealing, then chances are your favored outcome will be chosen.
Asking to choose amongst your proposals will limit their thinking.
1.
Present your favored choice2.
Present an unacceptable alternative3.
Frame the whole thing as a questionThe subtlety lies in making a realistic but scary alternative.
Make it too scary, and you lose your credibility. If it's not scary enough, your compliance rate drops. Bonus tip #1
If you present the unacceptable alternative before your favored choice, you might increase your chances with the fear and relief principle, which describes the effect that people have increased compliance rates after experiencing fear and relief in quick succession.8
Bonus tip #2
You will get even greater compliance if you also add a third choice that is a slightly less attractive version of your favored choice.
8 Dolinski D. and Nawrat R. (1998). Fear-then-relief procedure for producing
compliance: Beware when the danger is over. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 34, 1, 27-50.
The other person's mind will immediately discard the unacceptable alternative and focus on the other 2 choices.
Then it will be easy to choose between your preferred outcome and a degraded version of it.
As always, a long example requires a concrete example: Would you rather buy…
1. An expensive laptop? 2. A cheap one?
3. A cheap one with a guarantee?
Notice how you discarded the first choice and finally chose the third one.
So in real life... Sales
This HP computer is absolutely great. It has lots of features that many hardcore gamers will be interested in. The price is a bit hefty at 987 dollars, but it's really worth it if you play Call of Duty online.
The ACER might be more suited to your needs, as you said you'd only be using the internet. It's good value for money, and at 346 dollars it's a steal.
NoteX is a great laptop as well. I personally own this one, and I'm quite happy. It's quite similar to the ACER, but it is priced at 325 dollars.
So would you prefer the HP, the ACER or the NoteX?
Job interview (you explaining why you should be hired)
I understand that many other people have applied for this job. Most of them are just fresh out of college. Would you prefer to hire me or to hire people with no real experience?
Demonstration close
As a marketing professional, I can tell you that qualifying the prospect is one of the most important things you should do.
Fail to do that, and you will
1.
Waste your time2.
Waste your efforts3.
Lose potential customersThe demonstration close is a technique that you could use straight from the beginning.
1.
Make a bold unproven statement2.
Ask if the other person can commit if you can demonstrateyour statement
3.
Pitch your product or serviceThis should help you understand how interested the other person
is and know if you have a chance of closing the deal at the end
of the conversation.
The commitment can be for the other person to:
1.
Purchase right now — so you avoid the time delay technique2.
Tell how much money can be spent — so you gain an edge during the negotiation3.
Do any other call to action you can think about Bonus tip #1The demonstration close can also work thanks to curiosity. If you make your bold statement intriguing enough, then people will be curious to see how you will demonstrate it.
Persuasion examples
What if people don't want to commit?
If you're busy, move to another, ‘hotter’ prospect. If you're not, make them want to commit.
Bonus tip #2
The demonstration close should not be framed like a bet, because in a bet there is a loser and a winner. Nobody likes to be on the losing side. Frame it as a genuine question. You're just trying to find out if there is an interest before boring them with a lengthy explanation — which will undoubtedly prove your point.
Thermometer close
Trying to sell without having an idea of the extent of the customer’s interest is like trying to find your way in an unknown city without a proper map.
You have no idea if you're going in the right direction and you don't know how far you are from your final destination. That's pretty bad indeed.
So what do you do?
Ask for directions (of course).
And what if closing a deal could be that easy? What if you only needed to ask for directions?
The thermometer close is exactly what you need:
1.
Ask them to tell you how they feel about purchasing something on a scale of 1 to 10.2.
Ask them what they would need to get to 10.3.
Give them what they ask for or propose something else.4.
Ask them to rate their interest again -> Back to step 2.5.
At 10, close the deal!Warning
If the person rates it lower than 5, you might not be pitching the right product. Find another product to offer.
The great thing about the thermometer close is that once you get the prospect to give a number, the interest can only go up if you manage to add features. The false close also works this way, by stacking additional benefits (I describe more of this technique in Billion Dollar Influence).
The advantage of the thermometer close is that you know exactly how far you are from closing the deal. Make sure that you ask the customer to measure their interest every time you add an advantage, especially if it is a requested benefit.
And when you're at 10, close the deal! Bonus tip #1
It helps if you mention early on when describing the scale that 10 means that they want to purchase the product right now. By congruence, they will buy if you get them to 10.
Bonus tip #2
This technique works a lot better with people who think of themselves as being rational.
It's great because if you know someone can't be persuaded emotionally, then the thermometer close is absolutely the right tool to use.
AFTER THE CLOSE
Compelling questions
People change their minds all the time.
If they were very enthusiastic just after their purchase, they might be highly unsatisfied after a few days and blame you for that.
Ask yourself these questions:
What's the point of selling if your service or product is
going to be refunded?
What's the point of persuading if people are going to
resent you for that?
What's the long-term value of an unsatisfied customer?
The compelling statement technique is simple:
1.
Close the deal2.
Understand why the customer bought your product3.
Make the customer say why they bought your product aloud They will have made their compelling statement.The compelling question is the question you ask so that the other person issues a compelling statement.
This technique is used after the other person has committed. Just get this statement when the negotiation and the sales are finished and the other person is relaxed.
By making the other person say WHY they committed, you make sure they remain committed in the long term.
You should be asking the question nonchalantly and frame it as genuine interest in the other person, not as a market survey question. It’s also a good technique to keep building rapport.
Examples (after closing)
Bonus tip #1
Repeat the compelling statement when they leave, or when you meet them again.
Bonus tip #2
This compelling statement will help you understand a lot about the other person ... and help you cross-sell, up-sell, and future-sell. It is a bit more risky than a distracting question, but it yields better long-term results.
Distracting questions
As we have just seen, life is full of distractions.
Just to draw the comic strip, I think I've been interrupted seven times by “unmissable” Facebook updates.
The distracting question technique is a powerful objection handling technique ... because it prevents the objection from even coming to the mind of the other person.
1.
Make sure the other person likes the product2.
Keep asking questions to avoid objections3.
Close the dealKeeping the mind of the other person busy is crucial!
It's a good way to create rapport, and you're showing interest in the other person.
It's important to keep asking questions so that it does not feel like you're rushing the sale, and therefore trying to rob them of their freedom of choice.
It's also a good opportunity to use emotionally-loaded questions to help the other person build an emotional connection with the product.
Bonus tip #1
You can use the distracting question as a good opportunity to find out if you can up-sell or cross-sell other products.
Bonus tip #2
I keep repeating myself, but remember to use the double-bind and rhetorical question techniques.
PRACTICE
Here’s the hard truth that everybody knows: Practice makes all the difference.
Training course junkies will have already closed the books and skipped to the next one… But you’re still here!
“You have to learn the rules of the game. And then you have to play better than anyone else.”
— Albert Einstein
mindset is the “Only questions” game.
If you watch the great improv comedy show “Whose Line is it anyway”, you might be familiar with the game.
The comedians line up and create a dialog that is based on questions only. The first person who does not ask a question is out.
The goal is not to trick the other person, but to last as long as possible.
If you try this game yourself, you might get stuck really fast if you use too many open-ended questions.
Open-ended questions are great when you have no clue where you’re going, but they don’t add to the conversation.
They’re dead weight in that game.
What are you doing? Where are we?
Who are you?
Replace with
What do you intend to do with that chainsaw? Do you also feel the ground shaking?
Are you the captain of this boat?
They have to BRING something to the conversation. Bonus tip:
CONCLUSION
“Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.”
― Mahatma Gandhi
Life is a long journey of learning. Every day, you get a piece of the puzzle.
To become a great and expert persuader, you have to take time to put the pieces together instead of just collecting them.
I recommend that you read the book at least one more time (if it is your first time reading it), so that you can make sure that you’ve integrated the whole question framework.
You can download the mind map and additional tips at www.foolproofpersuasion.com/bonus
I have included a cheat sheet that lists all the questions and I also provide you with another fun and unusual way to practice them.
Learn, practice, share. If you are interested in learning other persuasion techniques, you can get weekly updates at www.vinh.co
or read my other book Billion Dollar Influence which addresses a larger persuasion framework.
Remember that you are part of this world and that you can change it.
FROM THE SAME AUTHOR
Billion Dollar Influence: A Persuasion Skills Masterclass from Someone Who Sells Private Jets for a Living
Paperback: 106 pages
Publisher: NLPbooks (August 8, 2014) Language: English
ISBN-10: 1781331049 ISBN-13: 978-1781331040
Product Dimensions: 8.5 x 0.2 x 8.5 inches
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