Weapons of Mass Attracion, A Proven Potent
Process for Seducing Women
© 2007 – T’s Education – All Rights Reserved –
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First Published July 2007 Author - T
Publisher - T’s Education Editor - Michael Brown Designer - Dan Segal
Contributions
Mehow www.mehow.tv
Pickup 101 (Lance Mason, Daniel Johnson) - www.pickup101.com Mystery – www.mysterymethod.com
Juggler – www.charismaarts.com
The Approach - Vincent DiCarlo (Woodhaven) www.the-approach.net Kris Karp (aka Bee Sting)
Credit is given to the seduction community as a whole for industry standard techniques.
The Introvert
The Start
How to learnThe Seduction Community’s basics Pseudonyms & nicknames
Become willing to push your comfort level Leave them better than you found them Women testing men’s frames
Shit tests Mindsets
Visualization & positive reinforcement exercises The Ven Visualisation
Self-defeating mentality
Alpha is not enough: be un-reactive
Attraction
Being counterintuitive
Training yourself to be counterintuitive How to be playful
Indifference: the hot/cold approach Push/pull
T’s Takeaways Fence Sitters Mixed Replies Congruence
Being exclusive & in high demand Emotional association Disqualifiers Being Interesting Social Proof Sleep
contents
Approach Anxiety & Rejection
“Mental Hardwires” & “Evolutionary” theory Rejection anxietyApproach anxiety Actually getting out there Shyness
The first 3 minutes The “Guinea Pig” theory The “4 Year Old Girl” theory The “Cameron Diaz” theory The “Best Friend” theory Approach instantly
Let me solve all your approach fears Excuses & assumptions
Transition into “Natural Game”
Opening
How to hold yourself when you approach: Lean back Familiarise yourself with your surroundings
Getting their attention Types of indirect openers T’s “3 Hit Hybrid” opener The 4th hit
Situational openers Opening seated sets Forward merging General tips Conersational skills
Conversations: how to keep them fluent & interesting Grabs
Fluency Dendros theory
Dendros “Networking” theory
Disagreeing with them to demonstrate value Disagree to keep it interesting
How to talk to a group Sexual innuendo
Items of interest during set (gambits) The truth game
Peacocking
Linking peacocking to your story The role play process
Making social norms obvious Anti-norms
“The Cube” & “Cold Reading” The 7 powers of “The Cube”
Truism mastery The handshake Spinning the target
Establishing social status with aid of a wing The “Post-it Note” game
The photo neg
Isolating
Isolating methodsObstacles & In-Set Issues
NegsT’s Neg List
Managin the competition
Perfecting your “what the fuck?” look Using sarcasm to diffuse tension
Using body language to alienate an obstacle Getting rid of the group & keeping the target
Getting people to act how you want them to, using frames Using sexual frames
Reversing frames to oust obstacles The “Reframe”
Diffusing AMOG negativity Using sarcasm
The “Fantation” The “Anti-Role Play”
Rapport & Escalating
Communicating your interest in the target “Bedroom Eyes”
Letting them know that You mean business: Communicating IOI’s Telling a good story
Steps of compliance “Kino” (touching) Where to touch
Ven’s Touching technique
Her body language & what it says Playing it safe
Kissing: Making the move
Phone Numbers & First Dates
Getting their numberGetting the date with minimal rejection: the 1st call Nicknames
The 2nd call: Telling her rather than asking her The “Anti-Flake” messaging system
Flake recovery Last minute resistance
The Final Process
Miscellaneous
Mainainging a successful relationship & your personal growth The mindfuck
Breakup recovery Locus of control The “Reconext” The “Friend’s Zone” Energy
The ultimate false time constraint The “Backpacker” theory The “3 kiss depature”
Too nervous to practice in the real world?
Have you received an anonymous text message?
Dont recognise their voice & want to avoid upsetting them? Go to a gay bar
“…and then there was Jonathan”
Saturday Night (Sydney, Australia)
9:30pm
Frozen in this toilet cubicle Jonathan sits motionless, waiting for them to leave. Paralyzed from fear, this urine scented safe house starts to feel more like home. Anything to avoid the party let alone his “friend” Simon outside. “Oh man she was so hot, she made it too easy for me” Simon said as he entered the bathroom. His friend Tom replied enthusiastically “She was yours from the beginning, you’re doing well tonight. Where’s that weirdo you came with? I thought I saw him come in here.” Jonathan peers through the slot of the cubicle door only to see Simon shrug his shoulders in dismay as to where his tag-along has run off to. “For all I know he’s in here, Tom!” Simon replies.
Jonathan’s pulse races, they know he’s there. He starts to review the night’s events in slow motion. Why did he ever agree to coming to this party? He barely knew Simon but decided to go anyway and this is the reward he gets for trying to push himself to be social. High expectations only lead to greater disappointment. Sitting in the men’s room angry at himself for even trying, the only thing he wanted was that sinking feeling deep in his stomach and the tightness across his chest to subside, even a little.
It has been years since he had a woman, years since a date and by the looks of things, a lifetime of introversion. No one likes to settle for second best and tonight was a significant slap on the wrist teaching him an important lesson. Some people are made for socializing and others are meant to stay home.
Sunday Morning:
3am
The security guard hollered through the cubicle’s plywood doors “Hey buddy we’re closing up, you’re going to have to finish up in there and make your way out”.
“Oh, so the night’s over and everyone’s left?” Jonathan asked trying to appear surprised and subtly find out whether he’d have to face the nightclub’s patrons again. His stilted voice undermined the confidence he was attempting to exude, the security guard noticed and told him he can go out the back way if he wished. Jonathan graciously accepted and sauntered down to the nearest bus stop to wait for the 325 route back to his parent’s house.
That was the longest bus ride of his life.
Born in Sydney, Australia, Jonathan, a young man in his early twenties decided that night never to place himself in any form of social context unless it was absolutely necessary. He made a resolution to stop attending classes for his Business and Law degrees and learn purely via correspondence, the mere sight of people talking to each other at university made his chest tighten with anxiety.
It was not always like this. During his teens he was one of the first and more successful ladies men in his school despite being only five foot six, hairy and prematurely balding. His reputation preceded him as a natural with women and he enjoyed unmitigated success. As he neared the end of his school days his future aspirations of being a lawyer saw Jonathan remove himself from the social scene as he studied relentlessly to gain entry into both Business and Law.
He graduated, gained entrance to the degree of his choice and decided it’s time for him to celebrate after a year of isolation. Jonathan’s close friends had gone overseas so he decided to call Simon, a friend of a friend, and ask him if he wanted to join him on his first ever nightclub experience.
It was not what Jonathan expected.
It was very different to school parties he used to go to with his friends. It was the night 54 rejections and hours of ridicule made him realize that his past successes were never to be recreated again. He decided to move on with his life and accept his new place within society.
Two Years Later
4pm
It was a hard day at work. The 5am start working as a laborer in a small-goods factory ended with Jonathan’s car not starting. Smelling like a smoked ham, he boarding the bus home and fell into a conversation with a large red-headed man called Sidney. A young guy in his mid-thirties, large enough to occupy two regular bus seats.
Covered in freckles from head to toe his blue shirt complimented a classy black leather belt that, for some reason, was sitting on the outer rim of his jeans and not threaded through the loops. Next to him was his girlfriend Stephania; a six foot four brunette dancer with light-grey eyes. They were deep in conversation until the bus reached Central Station and she left telling him she’d call after work.
How could a man that looks like this be courting a woman like that? It was impossible. Jonathan was adamant she was one of those mail-order brides
he kept hearing about. His curiosity got the best of him and Jonathan approached his first stranger in years asking him how he did it. “My good looks!” Sidney replied, laughing hard. Jonathan didn’t know what to say, he sat there speechless and awkward. It would be rude to move seats so instead he starting looking intently at the advertisement for panty-liners on the bus seat as if it was something he was genuinely considering trying. “I’m a pickup artist”, Sidney said.
“You paint?” Jonathan inquired.
“Not quite, I pick up women for a living”, Sidney replied. “Where do you drop them?” Jonathan said.
Sidney bit his lip, half frustrated half humored, “I teach men to socialize effectively and efficiently. Basically improving the quality of their lives even if they look like me”. Jonathan found it hard to suspend his disbelief that such a man could be telling the truth and even that such a concept existed. He thought he would dig deeper into this man’s line of work: “I charge $3,200 for a weekend workshop” Sidney revealed. Suddenly that sinking feeling re-entered Jonathan’s stomach, the same from the nightclub two years ago. “I can’t really afford that on my wage…is it possible to pay you in ham and beef products or paintings? I’m an artist as a hobby.”
Sidney agreed to both and five paintings and three Christmas hams later Jonathan was on his way to becoming T, a man who will later be known as one of the most infamous seducers in the city, working for a variety of pickup companies as a dating coach known for turning men like himself into some of the most impressive pickup artists in the world.
He became part of an underground society of socially inexperienced men looking to improve their success with women. A society later to be exposed in the New York Times Bestseller The Game by Neil Strauss. Attending a multitude of dating workshops, reading hundreds of books and initiating thousands of interactions with new women has seen T become a dating authority for men all over the world.
T has learnt, applied and even taught nearly every pickup method or social process he came across, and learnt the hard way that only 95% of what he learnt could be applied effectively and with consistent results each time. Though these techniques were rigid, they were either vague or only applicable to one context or to one personality type.
Spending years studying every piece of information he could get his hands on T unearthed the psychological foundations behind every
successful technique and began developing their principles into a process that can be applied to anyone in any situation.
Sidney and T became close friends and T began to look outside the seduction community for inspiration and began interviewing thousands of natural ladies’ men about their interactions.
T: So what did you first say to her?
Natural: I don’t know, I just said whatever came to me, something about her dress.
T: But how did she get attracted to you?
Natural: You just need to be more confident, women love confidence T: But how do I get “more confident”
Natural: just feel it within you T: But how?
The script never changed and never helped. The few people who were able to provide advice to T gave him vague and intangible answers he found hard to apply: “Just be more confident”, “Try to be funnier” and “Just be you” were answers that didn’t cure anything. He needed specific steps.
Years of trial and error, practice and study saw the birth of the T Method. A dynamic and devastatingly effective process that provides concrete processes for being more confident” or “being interesting”. these vague terms have been quantified into a science that consistently delivers positive results with women and destroys other male competition in an ethical and gentlemanly fashion every time.
The T Method is all about helping people evolve and aims to make you understand, rather than just learn, the underlying foundations behind every seduction theory. Once you understand this, you can become dynamic in any situation.
Already many of T’s students have bedded, dated and even married some of the most glamorous and sought after people around. He now spends his time teaching people the arts of social engineering and is constantly improving people’s social abilities in facets of their social and business lives.
{the start}
“We cant solve problems using the same
kind of thinking we used to create them..”
Albert Einstein
How to Learn
This book is not meant to be placed in the wrong hands. The methods outlined are highly potent and work with devastating effectiveness. For these reasons they are not to be used if you feel you have intentions other than seducing someone.
Our mission is simple: follow T’s techniques correctly and your success with women will increase exponentially. All the tactics in this book have been proven by a variety of different men, of different demographics and on a range of beautiful women.
In this book we cut through to the core issues, give you examples of how to apply them, tips from other professionals and a female opinion on the methods provided. After reading thousands of techniques, books and doing a myriad of seminars and workshops I have strived to make this book (in both structure and content) what every other seduction theory is lacking in substance or structure.
You’ll read in books and hear in seminars advice like “be more playful” or “just tell a more interesting story” and they will call this seduction advice whilst you are left sitting thinking “But how?” This is where I come in. I will give you straight answers without superfluous page-filling junk and provide examples along the way to really make sure you get the most out of this book and ultimately the most out of your mattress.
Every pickup artist (PUA) takes the best bits from each method they learn and combine them into a process that they feel comfortable with. This book consists predominantly of my own theories and techniques, which are either original ideas or previously established tactics that I have tweaked to make more effective.
Throughout my studies and practice I have come across some techniques developed by other successful pickup artists whom I feel are too important to leave out. I know all the answers but I did not invent them. Out of fairness to you I have included content other than my own to give you a better understanding of what you need to learn and provide you with a variety of alternatives. If you do not feel comfortable with any tactic mentioned then pick an alternative provided.
To save you the effort of learning other theories (although this is still recommended) I have included and expanded upon some key tactics from the world’s greatest pickup artists, improved some and in addition provided you with my own expertise so you can pick and choose what suits you. This way you can get the benefit of a workshop condensed into an e-book tailored to fit you.
a minimum of 100 times each.
A lot of what you will read here is considered ‘outer game’: tips, tricks and formulaic methods for seduction. You will find that you will come to rely on these less and less as they are only training wheels to improve your ‘inner game’: your sense of self and general constitution. A good inner game will always trump any lines you learn however your outer game tactics are essential in helping develop your inner pickup artist (PUA).
As with any success that you will have in life there are certain downfalls that come with something that is too good or too beneficial. As stated above, memorizing too much canned material and then relying on it as opposed to using it as a leg up will undoubtedly lead you into perpetual self-doubt.
Even though the tactics provided to you have immense psychological value you will soon realize that being able to use the T Method effectively will see you acknowledging that you have always had the right material within yourself to pull off these seductions but that your application was flawed. The issue is not necessarily your looks or inherent personality rather how your personality has been and can be communicated to place you in the best possible light.
Now let us get down to business. I would like to welcome you to the now not-so-underground society of pick-up science. An international community present in over 147 countries all using a variety of different schools of thought and all made up of men who built themselves up from being lifelong virgins to some of the most powerful seducers in the world. These pick-up artists (PUAs) refer to the process of reducing seduction down to a science know as “The Game”. In no way is this to infer that our primary intention is to play with people or their hearts, rather calling this process “The Game” is an analogy that helps us detract from the importance men place upon bedding or winning over women. Just like a computer game it should be fun, entertaining and should you fail once you can always play again right from where you picked off without having lost anything.
The harder the challenges you give yourself and the more often you expose yourself to them the quicker you will learn. Some guys are scared of approaching women, one man can go out 4 nights a week and speak to 20 different girls a night and within a month he will be a player. Another guy might make an approach once a week, he may take a year or more to get where he wants to go.
Going out and practicing to this extent is near to impossible if you do not have a buddy who is also learning and can accompany you on your escapades. A lot of people avoid finding a wing-man or going out to
practice as they feel if they give this a real shot and fail at it they will really be in dire straights. For most this is the last step; professional guidance on how to pickup women. It can appear demoralizing and risky that if a professional cannot help then the realization of eternal loneliness and social ineptitude will set in. This is a very real fear however I personally guarantee you that if you practice any one of the techniques in this book at least twice you will see a positive change in how you relate to people socially and at work.
To help with your learning, my girlfriend Soe has offered to go through this book and add a female perspective to some of the areas I have touched upon. She is currently studying law, is one of Sydney’s premier pole dancers and has worked for a variety of pickup companies including my own. I feel that she can provide some interesting viewpoints as she has not only been subjected to my own game but also other PUA’s and their methods that she has met over the past year.
The Seduction Community’s Basics
All pick up artists (PUAs) go by an alternate name. PUAs worldwide congregate on lairs: online forums allocated by city1. Keeping your real
identity hidden gives you the power to say what you think and publicly discuss your seduction issues without having to fear that people will know who you really are.
Secondly, for reasons of ego, PUAs may find it hard to transform themselves into a better seducer when they are holding on to their old traits and image. A new nickname can be seen as symbolic of their new identity. The ability to start afresh is a powerful thing; calling yourself by your normal name will make it harder to shed the negative qualities you feel you might have. Start by making a list of the five men you most admire, concentrate on what makes them attractive and what qualities they posses that you would like your new self to emulate. Give yourself a new name that you are comfortable using both in the field (out in reality) and in the virtual world (internet forums) then create your own, new, fresh identity.
Here are some common terms you will come across that are used in every-day conversation between pickup artists:
PUA: Acronym for pickup artist
The field: The real world. A term used to differentiate between talking online and reality
Set: An alternate term for an interaction e.g. Going into set or having a good set
AMOG: Alpha Male of the Group is the man who is the leader and is your biggest
threat.
Peacocked: To draw attention to yourself through the use of brightly coloured or visually interesting objects, like a male peacock does with its tail feathers.
Kino: To touch
Target: The woman who the PUA aims to seduce Frame: Your frame of mind
Become Willing to Push Your Comfort Level
The more you expose yourself to situations that make you anxious or awkward the more you will become complacent with your fears. Your first few weeks as a pickup artist will see you develop in the same way a stockbroker does on his first day in the stock exchange.I’ll use my friend Steve the stockbroker as an example.
Everything was happening so quickly, he had a very faint idea as to what is going on around him and by the time he realized what happened five minutes ago twenty new events have occurred. He could not afford to freeze or freak out; sure he was nervous but if he leaves the floor or cracks under pressure he will lose millions of dollars. He recognized that he was anxious but knew that he had to manage his fear in order to get the results he needed.
After a few weeks in this high-pressure environment he was more familiar as to what the standard procedures were and even though it was highly stressful he powered through the day regardless, and soon stress changed into excitement.
The only times you will improve is by gradually pushing yourself outside of your comfort zone. If you walk into a bar for the first time and are too scared to initiate a conversation (referred to as ‘opening’) with an attractive stranger then try an easier task. Open someone you are not attracted to and are less nervous around.
The aim is to keep breaking down your growth and learning into manageable bits. Once you feel that you are bored or competent with talking to women you are mildly attracted to then take it up a notch and approach groups of those types of women with men around them. In Arnold Schwarzenegger’s movie “Pumping Iron” he talks about how his goal for the day is to bench press a weight 30 times consecutively. When he hits number 30, his arms feel like jelly and his body feels like it is going to
explode but he will try for another one or two lifts.
He realizes that it is really only the last one or two additional lifts that builds muscle regardless of how painful it may feel. He knows that the next time he does this exercise he will be considerably better at it because he pushed himself to his limit the time before.
Whenever you are out in the field and want to quit, open one more sets before you go and never go out alone at the beginning. Take a buddy for moral support and to help you pick up on (and pick you up after) your pitfalls.
Leave them better than you found them
It is very easy to turn arrogant once you get a taste of success. It will always come back to bite you. Be nice to people on your way up otherwise you will be saying hello to them again on the way back down. Always remember that being arrogant comes from insecurity. Good PUAs can be arrogant but the best are genuinely nice guys who do not get walked over. They treat you how you treat them and try to improve women’s lives rather than play with them.You need to figure out what is important to the women you approach and paint a picture for them of what it will be like once they reach that goal. Make them feel good and push them to do things they ordinarily would think they are incapable of. That is as touchy-feely as I am going to get, just always try to keep the man you aim to be in focus.
Women Testing Men’s Frames
Women instinctively search out particular qualities in a man. They do not even know they are constantly screening men for value; it is automatic and purely instinctive.
a man’s strength of frame is an attractive quality; how he holds himself and retains mental control and stability in an intimidating situation. If you lack composure, are weak in character or are not much of a leader then she will not be attracted to you.
Women test men’s character in a variety of different ways: • Showing up to dates late
• Expecting men to pay “all the time”
• Having tantrums or reacting to ‘little’ things that annoy them • Not returning calls or text messages
Women do this because in a matter of minutes they find out what kind of guy you are and whether you are a man with a strong frame of mind. This in turn saves them time and sorts the boys from the men. A beautiful woman can get 10 approaches a day even if she does not realize she is being hit on. She does not have the time to spend a few hours with each man and get to know whether he is a good guy or not; she goes with her gut feeling and moves on.
It is the same feeling that would stir within you if I were to place you in a car dealership and tell you that you can have any one car but make your decision within 10 minutes. You would rush around quickly sitting in some, merely just looking at others and you would go with your gut and finally make a decision. This is the process some women go through their whole lives; you need to differentiate yourself as soon a possible and in a strong way.
Think about it for a second…
The average attractive woman will get approached 8-10 times a day, if they took the time out to exchange details and date every guy that approached her she would not have time for anything else. By ‘testing” your strength of frame she saves time and takes a shortcut to finding out in a short matter of a few minutes whether you are a Chuck Norris or a penguin. Don’t be a penguin.
Just realize that you choose to give her power because you choose to be attracted to her. Try not to advert to the thing that gives her power. If people realize they are the holders of power in the interaction often they are more likely to take advantage of this, for example getting drinks off you or by leading you on.
This is the same in any context where there is an element of power. Take work for instance; people act considerably differently around their bosses because both they and the boss knows how that specific power dynamic operates. The boss will know just how far he can push his employee before the employee realizes that they are being taken unfair advantage of. Many women, for instance, are subjected to their bosses being sexually inappropriate in the workplace yet fail to make a complaint as they are scared they will lose their jobs. The bosses in these workplaces often know of this fear and realize it makes the employees vulnerable and take advantage where they should not.
The same principle applies to seduction and social interactions. If someone knows you like them and they do not have an interest in you they may try to use you for their own personal gain and up unto the extent that they think you will allow. Walking up to a woman in a bar and telling her she is “The hottest girl in the club” and then offering to buy her a drink
then wondering why she leaves once the cocktail’s been finished is no big mystery. The moment she realized the man likes her and she is not interested in him she will still want to put him to good use. She knows that men who have been attracted to her in the past will do things a stranger would not usually do.
Shit tests
Shit tests are one of the main ways women test men’s frames of mind. They are the most effective, efficient and common ways to determine whether you are man enough for them. As a general rule the hotter the woman, the harder her shit tests. Better looking women will get approached more, develop higher standards and have more gall when it comes to finding the diamonds in the rough. This is their way of seeing whether you are man enough to be with them.
Shit tests come in all shapes and sizes. Ultimately they are designed to throw you off course and can be a series of abrupt questions,
comments or anything to test how far they can push you. The more easily manipulated, shocked, offended or nervous you appear to be, the less value you have. The goal is to differentiate yourself from other men who have failed these before you.
“Can’t you see we’re talking here?” “Do I know you?”
“Whatever!”
“Can you get me a drink?”
All of the above are forms of shit tests. There is a serious double standard when you compare what women can say and get away with when compared to what men can say to a woman. You can identify a shit test by asking yourself “If I was to say to her what she just asked me, would I expect her to get offended?”
One essential key to passing the shit test is not so much to say something witty but to be counter intuitive and demonstrate both verbally and through your body language that you are not phased. Words can be faked, even some body language can be faked and a female’s evolutionary instincts are trained to weed out the legitimate candidates from the fraudsters. You need to show you are totally unaffected.
A shit test, in its essence, is a compliance test. Women put out a hoop and the men who jump through it will be considered of a lesser value to the men who do not. The best way to pass these “shit-tests” is for the man to make the woman feel as if she has earned his compliance rather than him giving it over freely because he is attracted to her. There is no doubt that women who come up to men in bars and outright ask for a drink before having earned it will respect compliant men less than men who make
them earn their reward.
This is the same psychological premise that you see in spoilt children when compared with kids from poorer families. Spoilt children will never appreciate the ten gifts they get for their birthdays as much as poorer children appreciate the one gift they may receive. Men often give good-looking women rewards before they have earned them because men feel that the females’ appearances automatically dictate how much respect she will be given.
Even though women’s shit tests usually ask for something, the wrong answer (ironically) would be to give them what they asked for. My girlfriend and I were discussing how she would tell the boys at school to throw something in the bin for her because she could not be bothered to get up and she knew that because of her looks / popularity that they would be compliant.
When I asked her how she felt towards the people who rejected her request she replied that they are now her closest friends, they treated her like everyone else instead of putting her on a pedestal. This may seem odd considering these women set themselves up to be put on a pedestal however the men who succumb to these shit tests or do not handle them correctly will always be perceived as weak.
A shit test sorts the boys from the men; A woman wants to know who is man enough to treat her normally despite being attracted to her. Often it can be difficult to determine whether the woman’s request is legitimate or a shit test. Refusing to do something like pass her the handbag might seem like a rude response to a question that may or may not have shit test connotations. In these situations the best way to handle shit tests is through using sarcasm or playfully making her earn it.
Her: pass me my handbag over there
You : mmm…tell me a funny joke and then you’ll get your handbag Her: what?
You: tell me a funny joke first and I’ll give you your handbag Her: *tells joke*
You: sorry, not funny enough, I’ll be keeping the bag now; it goes well with my outfit too! *pass her the bag regardless of what you said*
Losing control of the situation, acting hostile or getting
the interaction. Furthermore complying with the shit test will
have a like effect, so what is the right answer? You saw above
how you can comply with their shit test by making them earn
your response but humour is also a highly effective way to
come out on top.
You: hey guys
Her: can’t you see that I’m trying to have a conversation here? You: that’s funny, so am I
Humour will always diffuse a hostile or awkward situation. Even if your retort is not that funny it is still considerably better than a hostile response. Soe’s Tip: Regarding the handbag, it is very important to still give it to her. Being playful is beneficial but more than 2 jokes in a row will seem annoying or childish. We want playful men and we are over teenage boys.
Mindsets
Visualization is a powerful technique for becoming better at a task without actually having to complete it.
Our mind and body can react to simple thoughts and fantasies in much the same way as it responds to actual events. Many psychologists and biochemists believe the nervous system cannot tell the difference between real or perceived threats, you produce the same chemical reactions in your brain when you dream or visualize as you do in reality. Fact: Two surgeons, Terry Orlick & Judy McDonald, would vividly imagine themselves cutting through fat and muscles in order to be more prepared for an upcoming operation. They would imagine certain setbacks and how they would regain composure and overcome them which overall dramatically improved their success rates when put in the real situation. Using this powerful technique and the exercises below can help you prepare for any social situation.
Exercise:
The more real your visualizations the greater the benefit of the exercises. Visualize these in detail and ask yourself what do you see, hear, smell and feel.
women will be receptive and enjoy your companyvisualize approaching a group of people and everybody liking you visualize yourself talking to a woman who has a positive and interested response visualize a date going well.
Now…
visualize yourself failing, then stopping (imagine the nervousness that will come with this) and recovering.
visualize other nervous situations you have experienced and use it to become familiar with this sensation.
It is a fact that your body reacts the same way when you are legitimately nervous as when you are visualizing a nervous scenario. With enough exposure to fear and nervousness you will gain a better understanding of these emotions and eventually become complacent with them. This principle is also why dreams feel so real and can affect your physical state.
Exercise:
Power Words are words that can be associated with the recovery of a specific awkward feeling or sensation. Also known as “cure” words they are anything that allows you to regain composure and focus.
If you are fearful then use a ‘power’ word to detach and separate yourself from it. Breathe in and count to ten keeping your breath slow and deep while reciting your ‘power’ word.
For example lets say you had an important business meeting coming up and you had to speak to over 300 people on the topic of circumventing the privity doctrine using equitable estoppels (of which you know nothing about, and if you do, please let me know). Fortunately, you pulled it off, you impressed the boss and received a raise, got the phone number of that girl from work you have been lusting after and the two of you head to the bar and purchase a nice celebratory champagne.
In this example “Champagne” could be your power word of choice. Think it and say it aloud.
While reciting this word think of the story and its events as a film in your mind. You will begin to associate the word champagne with success and excitement. Think of a fear inducing scenario like ‘public speaking’ being transformed into a successful event. Apply this to your own past situations and remember your cure words and the events themselves if you get nervous.
You can overcome anything if you are prepared mentally. Imagining yourself regaining composure, feeling calm and in control and the feeling of success.
Place yourself in situations where fear would arise on YOUR TERMS. There is not as much pressure if you are the one who instigates it.
Put yourself in a situation where you will be the centre of attention and be speaking to a large group of people.
Approach new groups of people regularly throughout the day. Offer to hand some work in prior to its due date.
Time yourself at home in doing a brain teaser or test.
Our mind and body can react to simple thoughts and fantasies in much the same way as it responds to actual events. Many psychologists and biochemists believe the nervous system cannot tell the difference between real or perceived threats, you produce the same chemical reactions in your brain when you dream or visualize as you do in reality. Associate “cure” words to your 5 most common negative emotions. Place yourself in situations where these emotions would arise but stop to consciously remind yourself to manage them.
Let us take the emotion of Humour and the situation of when you told a funny joke about skydivers and everybody laughed (with you, not at you). Choose the word “skydiver” and mentally re-play the situation in your head whilst making an active effort to feel the same emotions you did that day.
Exercise:
Recognize nervousness and recognize it is born from a certain fear you have within you. Lets say that fear is based on rejection. Your rejection is based on a certain past rejection in which you were upset because someone you were interested in did not reciprocate. Realize that you felt bad because she was gorgeous. Now realize that good looks are common and in nearly every nightclub there will be at least 20 good looking women.
Once you feel an emotion, consciously work back in your mind as to what the core issue is. Solve the cause and you solve the problem.
TIP: You might feel stupid or embarrassed whilst doing these exercises and that is normal. Although think of how stupid you feel when a woman in a club calls you a loser and tells you to leave her alone. Ultimately you can chose to feel like an idiot at home or in public. It’s important to understand that visualizations are a lot more beneficial than female rejection.
The Ven Visualization
Tantric sex instructor and close friend, Ven helped me get past some serious approach anxiety and sincerity issues whilst we were doing a pickup workshop together a while back. The exercise was to stop 60 random women in the space of two hours and pay them a compliment not associated with sex.
He was getting some of the most positive reactions from a myriad of gorgeous women yet for some reason when I delivered the same compliment e.g. “Excuse me that is the funkiest handbag I’ve seen all day” they looked at me like “Thanks but please don’t cut me into little bits”.
Ven, having done some acting in his time began to teach me how to pay a compliment and make it sound sincere even when you mean none of it. Let us take the handbag example; one girl I approached had an ordinary handbag with nothing really interesting on it. I visualized her handbag as one that was bright green with feathers all over it and dripping with red paint and I delivered the line of “Excuse me that is the most stylish handbag I’ve seen all day”.
She melted with appreciation yet every time I’d done it before, women looked at me like I was a weirdo. I legitimately was not interested in her handbag, it was boring. But in my mind I thought to myself what it would be like if it was legitimately funky (green with feathers etc) and then I approached. Women can smell insincerity; this is how to fake it when you need to.
If you want to achieve something ranging from having a sincere smile to paying a good compliment or even feeling happy, what you have to do is simple. Picture a time when you actually felt that emotion and then go into the set. This is exact way actors, after the 20th take, can still deliver a
line as legitimately as they did in the first take.
If you feel your smile is received as weird or insincere then imagine how you would feel if your best friend just won $50 million in the lottery. Keep that image and that feeling with you when you either approach or if you want to make a good impression instantly.
This form of visualization may weird you out; you might think it is some kind of new age hippy phenomenon that has no tangible qualities. I thought the same and I still would think that way if I had not tried it. The underlying premise is this: your facial expressions, body language and tonality are dictated by your brain depending on what subject matter is being processed by it.
and think back to a time when they had that feeling they do not fully feel its potency. This is because your visualization is not vivid enough. To help you get into it try to remember how things looked, felt, smelt and / or tasted to get you into the zone.
Self Defeating Mentality
The human mind thinks of negative thoughts 70% of the time. The ways you can get around this are three fold: have success, have a mentality that says “it is always on”, and do not hesitate. Whenever you have any doubt in your mind as to whether a woman likes you or as to whether you can make a move (be it approaching or even sex) assume that when in doubt it is always on. We cannot help how our brain works but we can curb these thoughts by making the jump and pushing ourselves to make a move. You need to understand that you are the one she needs to earn.
Alpha is Not Enough: Be Un-reactive
By Mehow
It has been said over and over again in the community that you should be alpha. That is important, of course, but at the same time, that same sense of urgent alphaness can lower your value.
A person, PUA or otherwise, can get so caught up in being alpha that they become over-reactive to everything. Any disrespect thrown in his face becomes an immediate threat to his alphaness that must be neutralized. This can be seen in bullies, ghetto thugs, and beach surfer AMOGs [NB: AMOG = Alpha Male Of the Group] that get near violent when you tool them back.
The bottom line is that you can be alpha, a leader and dominant, but if you’re reactive you’re still insecure as fuck, and it shows. You’ll get women, but you bet your ass they will be low quality women. What kind of woman wants a guy who can’t control himself? Think of a guy who feels his time at the top is so temporary that he must protect it by belittling or even threatening someone. Would you respect a female friend of yours dating a guy like that or would you think she had low self-esteem? So there are two types of Alphaness: Reactive Alpha and Un-reactive Alpha.
Reactive Alpha is Tupac Shakur. Un-reactive Alpha is Brad Pitt. Sometimes a friend and I will be walking, often peacocked, and an AMOG will yell a slur at us to tease us. Now we have a couple of options. We can either confront them, yell an AMOG tease back, or just keep walking.
How do we decide? Here’s the ultimate formula for any pickup situation: What would Brad Pitt do?
If Brad Pitt was walking down the street and someone yelled at him “’Mr. and Mrs. Smith’ sucked!” do you think he would even turn his head? Of course not! He made millions from that movie, what does he care? This goes also with dealing with women. Several PUAs I meet have a habit of “punishing” girls in field who aren’t interested, even if they try to end the conversation nicely. The girls will say they’re having a heart to heart conversation and ask him politely to leave. The guy will then stay and keep chatting them up, knowing full well that he has no chance. He badgers and harasses them.
Would Brad Pitt do that?
Think of what a guy would do who makes millions and can fuck a hottie any night of the week. Would he care about 2 girls not being interested? Would he care about a girl flaking? Would he care about a guy not liking his movie? Would he care if a girl called him ugly and told him to scram? Of course you could be a Reactive Alpha like Tupac and get into a fight with the AMOG, call the women bitches, get upset when a woman flakes, and still get laid, but only with women who don’t think they’re good enough for a guy who actually has his shit together like Brad Pitt. Also, keep in mind Tupac was so reactive it took him to his grave in his 20’s. Being un-reactive means you don’t get too excited about small successes and you don’t get too excited about small problems. A girl in field
touching your arm, even kissing you at the bar, is just another day at the office. You don’t blush when she says you’re cute, and you don’t lean in and get all hands on when she starts kinoing you (contrast to ghetto guys outside the club that when a girl touches they rub their hands all over them and say ‘Dang girl u fine!’)
A guy knocking your zebra cowboy hat off, a girl being rude, a girl turning her head at your kiss, is just another day at the office. 15 seconds after your hat is knocked off, you don’t even remember the guy. A rude girl is just that, a rude girl. By definition she’s someone who’s not worth your time anyway. She can only lower your value if you decide that a rude girl has say over how cool you are. Her having that kind of power is like letting a 10 year old choose a presidential cabinet member. If you truly have value, her words don’t change it. If her words affect how you feel about yourself, she didn’t lower your value because you never had it in the first place. When someone says something offensive, consider what’s really being said. I’m Jewish, and occasionally run into anti-Semitism. When someone
says “Jews are fucking assholes” to me, did that person just say something about ME, or did that person say something about HIM?
As far as I’m concerned, someone saying that to me just walked up and said “I’m an ignorant fuck.” Would you be offended by someone walking up to you and said “I’m an idiot”? No, you’d probably feel sorry for them. When a girl at a bar tells you you’re ugly and to go away, she really said “I’m really socially retarded and don’t know how to get out of uncomfortable situations without being a bitch.”
When an AMOG challenges you to fight, he’s really saying “I’m insecure, and if I don’t win this, I’m going to be upset the entire night.”
Similarly, an AMOG yelled to me in my pimpsuit a while back, “You look fucking stupid! Who do you think you are!!??” and he was upset! What do you think he was saying about himself?
When an AMOG is getting hostile, he’s saying “You hurt my feelings.” Seeing these things for what they are and not getting emotional is what un-reactivity is all about.
What would Brad Pitt do?
The Pattern Interrupt
We all have negative voices in our heads repeating certain ideas and perceptions we have about ourselves over and over. Each time an emotion is created from these thoughts our brain sends an electrical signal from one part to another. Too many repetitions of one negative emotion can see this connection forming a solid path in our thought processes and is quite difficult to avoid. Our thought processes can begin to be likened to a record on a turntable. The record has grooves and once you start the needle on the record it begins to follow the same path every time and same music will play verbatim again and again.
A lot of the time this is the wrong song playing in your head. A man can stand in a night club all night in fear of approaching a woman at the bar. Every time he takes a step forward in her direction he feels inadequate because he feels he is not good looking enough to have her, he is not rich enough, he is not sexually experienced enough or he is not charismatic enough to think of what to say.
These thoughts keep playing in his mind and every time they occur they just affirm what he already knows. He needs to stop the record playing, he needs to remix it, break this pattern and start a new thought process that plays in his mind.
To do this when these negative thoughts and emotions occur you need to distract yourself with something so obscure, so unexpected or even so funny that you totally forget about feeling inadequate. This act is called a pattern interrupt.
From that act onwards you will be less likely to feel the original negative emotion to the same extent (if at all). How severe the pattern interrupt is will determine the extent to which you avoid the original emotion in the future. The aim is that next time you step into a situation in which you feel inadequate, your pattern interrupt and the emotions that it creates will replace the negative emotions you initially felt.
For this reason it may be wise to get a friend to help you when you go out together. Throwing a glass of water on you is one example of something that will break the pattern however walking around with a wet crotch in a nightclub does not always work in your favour unless you want to get through the bar line quickly.
A more tame example may be acting like a monkey for a few seconds. Flailing your arms up in the air, making a screeching noise will feel and look very odd but the mere stupidity and unexpectedness of it will help curb the more serious issue at hand. Often impersonating some ridiculous animal gets near to no attention from people in a loud nightclub. You will be amazed how little people notice and if they do they just think you are telling a joke or have taken some methamphetamines.
Having a friend tell you what to do and come up with these pattern interrupts can help make them that much more unexpected. There are no rules or guidelines to creating them other than they need to be obscure enough to distract you from your original emotion.
Things Not to Say
Words can be powerful things.Someone who has depression might be constantly saying to themselves that life is useless, not worth living. They will use these words in their
everyday speech as well, and in doing so they convey negative emotions just by speaking and can also make other people around them depressed just through their choice of words.
Someone who avoids social situations would tell themselves they are not the extroverted type and they can never compete with upbeat party people. They say this to themselves so convincingly that they do not even bother to go out and try.
through meditation and prayers affirming the beauty of life. In this instance I do not want you to dwell on your internal dialogue specifically but rather how the things you say to others can affect your own self-esteem and the way other people see you.
Constantly apologizing is one of the things that can keep you stuck in a mindset where you feel subservient and have the need to appease everyone you encounter for the fear that they will either physically or emotionally hurt you. The problem is people now use the term “sorry” for many social interactions which do not warrant an apology. There are other words which work just as well without making you feel you need to be apologetic for your actions.
In effect the goal is not so much for you to say sorry, excuse me or to apologize less when you are in the wrong but rather wait until someone has a legitimate grievance with you before you do. Spend a week not apologizing for normal everyday things such as moving past someone in a crowd, not having the right change for the newsagent or making a joke that was not exactly a crowd pleaser. Wait until people stop you and let you know there’s a problem, you will be pleasantly surprised at how often you do not need to say sorry.
Saying sorry does not make you weak but saying sorry too frequently for trivial things and when you genuinely do not feel you need to apologize will make you feel week and be perceived as weak. Also keep in mind that the more you use apologies for every-day occurrences and when they genuinely are not needed you reduce their potency for when they are really needed.
The idea of not saying sorry when you do not need to stems back to the idea that the whole reason behind this method of seduction is to disturb the norm; to differentiate yourself from what the average male does. The average male may tell a woman a joke that she does not find funny or says is stupid or offensive. He would apologize just on the off chance that he really did offend her even if he genuinely believes he was in the right. This can relate back to shit-tests, a lot of grievances people have are to get attention or create drama in their lives as it can give them something to do or complain about to their friends.
{attraction}
“A man can be short & dumpy & getting bald,
but if he has fire, women will like him...”
Mae West
Attraction
Have you ever wondered why men who have nothing going for them can attract hot women? (And no, drink spiking is not the correct answer) Have you ever seen a beautiful woman with an average looking guy? He may have been bald, losing his hair, short, fat with a third arm growing out of his forehead and strangely enough he is still able to have a smoking little bunny as a girlfriend or FB (friend with benefits).
This is because attraction is created in our minds by what society tells us is attractive. Take a look at any paintings done over 200 years ago. The women are, by contemporary standards, overweight, pasty and plain. No one now is attracted to that because society’s perceptions of what is attractive have changed. Ultimately “beauty” is a social construct which is subject to change. Regardless of your looks you can create attraction with the woman you are interested in (the target). Just as society tells us what is attractive we can concurrently reprogram women to see us as attractive, as attraction is purely mental.
A smooth talker will always trump a boring model. Demonstrate that you are of a higher value than other men, make efforts to differentiate yourself and no matter what you look like you can change how you are perceived. In other words, women will choose you over any other man if they perceive you have something they do not.
Value is something which is considered of high worth by another; it is subjective and differs from individual to individual. A valuable trait which is attractive to one person may not be as attractive to another; however there is a set of traits which are universally attractive to 98% of women worldwide. Strangely enough attraction is all about conveying the following traits subtly:
• Confidence • Creativity • Dominance • Humor • Intelligence • Leadership • Social skills • Survival Instincts
You can appear to have the trait by emulating someone who demonstrates it effectively. Acting does come into play and you will need to push yourself to say and act in ways you would not usually do. You will end up perfecting these traits depending on what you feel you can adapt to, and your increased success with women will affirm in your mind that you want these traits to become part of your personality. If you
appear dominant, people will perceive you as a dominant person and allow you to take charge and lead; the same is applicable with the rest of the traits. Your beliefs are contagious, if you think they will work then they will. I will help you work on convincing yourself of this further on as we will also discuss some tactics to help you manage low-confidence and anxiety.
A more simplistic exercise is to observe people who possess some of the above traits and take note of how they act and interact with others. How do others treat him?
Is he respected? Or charismatic?
Most importantly can you see yourself possessing these traits even if it means making a conscious effort to improve? The aim of this book is to change you for the better. You need to be able to recognize that the traits that make up “you” are either not working when it comes to seduction or they are masked by emotions such as fear or other insecurities.
Soe’s Tip: Being dominant in a group is attractive though a man must not lose track of the limits of this dominance when relating to the “target”. Taking initiative, and “telling”, rather than “asking” is dominant leader-like behavior which is a very attractive quality but he must not be pushy or bossy. If she says no to whatever he proposes, turn to another tactic and do not dwell on it or insist for too long.
The Four Pillars of Seduction
In every seduction school of thought, in every good pickup artist and behind every love affair, four things always occur.
• counter intuitiveness • playfulness
• indifference
• a metaphorical push and pull relationship
These are the four pillars of seduction, the most essential traits of every successful interaction, and they are explained in greater detail below and throughout this book. All the theories in this book encompass at least one of these pillars and act purely as vehicles to aid you in demonstrating these traits. If you are one of the few people who have practiced to an extent that you can do these without pre-prescribed theories you will be able to seduce anyone in any social or commercial context.
Being Counterintuitive
Ever had a night where you felt like the king, you could do anything with anyone and get away with it yet next weekend you were using the same lines on the same people but you got nowhere. What will always differentiate you from the average male is making a conscious effort to be counter intuitive during your interactions.
The underlying premise is this: you need to differentiate yourself from every other man out there; you need to show that you are different to all the other average frustrated chumps (AFCs) who fawn over women. It helps to do this playfully so they are not fully sure as to whether you are serious or not.
An example may be when you get a girl’s number. The average man would either say “thank you” or something along the lines of “I’ll call you tomorrow at eight, I’d really like to continue our conversation about Mexican food / going overseas / the effect of tariffs on Kazakhstan’s economy / etc”. She’s heard this before and now you are slowly moving towards being perceived as average.
Alternatively you can choose to be counterintuitive and say something playful like “Thanks, I’ll give you a call when I’m drunk and lonely”. Lets take a second example and say a woman asks “Will you call me?” and you reply “Sure, what do you want me to call you?” as you walk off as opposed to “Sure, how’s Wednesday at seven?” Being witty does come into it however it is not essential, it just makes it easier to pull off. Once again be reminded that even though you can learn these lines word for word, you need to master the process and the mentality of being counter intuitive. Your aim is to be the exception rather than the norm. Instead of taking them on a date to coffee and the movies take them to the supermarket to do your shopping with you. If you can make a boring situation interesting you will put yourself light years beyond other men. Every other man will try to impress her by saying they are a doctor or a lawyer, even if this is true you will not catch her off-guard. Being counter intuitive can show you are spontaneous and comfortable within yourself. Even though I have studied business and law at university I still prefer to make a joke about how I make a living being a proof reader for sky-writers. Or if she says, “You’re such a nice guy” you could have the average reply of “No I’m not that great but thanks” or you can say “I’m actually a serial killer, but thanks for assuming I’m good value”. See where I’m coming from here?
Soe’s Tip: No way! No supermarket shopping… that is shocking. A guy that seems cheap is gross. I would rather a guy base the date on something that he had to do regardless of me having organized a date with him e.g. helping him shop for a present
Training Yourself to Be Counter Intuitive
By TThe best way to become counter intuitive is to take the time to ask yourself “what would the average guy say / do in this situation” and then see if you can do the opposite in a funny or playful way. Keep this in mind when you read through the rest of this book and I am sure you will see that most theories adhere to this rule.
How to Be Playful
Funny gets you attention, playful gets you laid. Playful usually involves you teasing the target whilst having a little smile or a smirk as if you are about to laugh. Any line ever said can be playful as it is the delivery which makes something playful rather than the content. You can give them subtle pushes to their shoulders and challenge what they say through subtly making fun of it.
For example, here is an interaction I had the other day which could happen to you…
on the weekends I go bush walking to clear my head
I can picture you in a sweaty wife-beater and safari hat hacking away at bamboo in 40 degree heat
ha-ha not quite, I like it when it is more relaxing and not as intense well there’s a nice pot plant over there, why don’t you go rub your face in it for a bit and it will save you heading out into the Amazon this weekend
ha-ha I don’t think I’m in the right gear for it *pointing at her high heals and cocktail dress*
if anyone can go hiking in stilettos and Gucci it could be you
and what’s that supposed to mean?
ha-ha ok whatever you reckon I reckon your favorite colour is blue
red actually
um…no, it’s blue. Trust me I think I’d know ok, whatever you think weirdo
are you usually this hostile towards guys you’re attracted to? no
good to know I’m the exception to the rule, don’t try breaking any other rules with me though, I don’t know for how much longer I can handle your flirting
Accusing them of flirting with you or trying to win you over, even when it is not the case, is a fun cheeky way of getting them to start to think “perhaps I am flirting with him… Maybe I do like him…” It really is as simple as teasing them about something whilst having a smile on your face. Even just saying “Oh c’mon!”, “As if” or “No way!” is considered being playful. Many PUAs use childish humour because even though it may be the most simplistic (e.g. Ew, don’t touch me you have cooties!) what was funny in the second grade is still funny now.
TIP: Elongating the ends of your words can make them sound sarcastic
and consequently playful. You can say anything you want to a woman but if it is done with a sarcastic tone and smile you can get away with it. In a recent workshop I showed a student the difference between telling a girl to “fuck off” playfully and then with a normal every-day tone.
When I said “fuck off” in a very ordinary expressionless way it came out offensive however when I elongated the suffix of “off” it then became playful. There is a difference between “fuck off” and “fuck offffffffff” or “as if” and “as-iiiff”. Additionally emphasizing each word by itself as opposed to emphasizing the whole sentence adds to sarcasm.
Soe’s Tip: With subtle pushes to the shoulders please do not poke… our brothers’ poke! And be gentle; we don’t like feeling we are being pushed around. Demonstration of strength should only be when we are being kissed, now that’s a big turn on.
Indifference: the hot/cold approach
Sending mixed messages is undisputedly one of the most powerful internal techniques you will ever learn. Indifference to a PUA is as stink is to a monkey and if done right, not only will you get laid faster but you can more easily lure someone into falling in love with you.
During all your interactions there needs to be an element of mystery and curiosity that keeps your woman chomping at the bit. An analogy used by renowned pick-up-artist ‘Mystery’uses a cat and twine to help communicate the dynamics of female interest.
If you dangle twine outside of a cat’s reach just enough so that its paw can just touch it but never obtain it you will have it mesmerized for hours. If you give it a taste of what it wants but never let it have the whole thing it will remain in your control. However once you give the entire piece of twine to the cat it will play with it for a few seconds, enjoy it and then realize the hunt is over and move on.
If you have not noticed by now, you need to be the twine just in the cat’s reach. Tease but never fully give in. When I say “give in” I am in no way referring to sex, I am talking about letting them know 100% about yourself, always aim to maintain an element of mystery and realize that you never have to be 100% compliant. Although if you hold the string too far out of the cat’s reach and it will see the challenge as unattainable and lose interest. Give too much twine too early and the cat will not appreciate it and get bored rather quickly. Even months into a relationship I will let something slip to continually make the woman aware that there is more to me than they initially thought. This can be anything from being an artist to taking a keen interest in cooking. Either way, the moment they feel they know you inside and out they will loose interest in you, always keep the chase alive.
You can instill mystery, wonder and highly potent attraction in your woman through two main techniques that have remarkable effectiveness: push / pull and indifference.
Soe’s Tip: This is probably the girliest comment I will make but you do not want to fall into a relationship where you hold back information and constantly have to think of appropriate times to tell them things about yourself. This will do for the first 3-4 months but no more.
Push / Pull
This is one of the most commonly recognized attraction theories due to its potency and effectiveness. The idea is simple, in your interactions you need to concurrently push them away for every time you pull them in to you.
Pushing your woman involves a disapproval of something they have done or something about the way they are. You are going to have to gauge how far you believe you can push the woman without them being totally offended. In a way this is you testing their frame, you are disapproving of something, which shows you are not like all the other guys who want to bed them and who tell them everything is wonderful. Once you push them away from you and create attraction you must always reduce its effects with something accepting or complimentary that does not relate to their looks (fashion sense is fine to mention though).
Too much of a push and you alienate her and come off as an asshole, too much pulling and you will seem easy. You need to make them feel like they are on an emotional roller coaster. They will not be able to figure you out, you will create more mystery, playfulness and consequently attraction.
Name: Simone
Age: 27
Location: Shopping Mall
I love sushi
really? Raw fish is pretty gross (push) but at least you have great taste in cocktails (pull), that mojito looks delicious.
Or
I love horror movies, there is something about aliens that really interests me
yes I can see that, you nerd! (push) That’s ok, I played dungeons and dragons once myself, we’ll get along great (pull)
The aim is to be subtle without being blatantly rude. If you are finding that you are coming across as rude you need to work on your delivery, it needs
