The mud was tossed through the air as Ugluk’s crude shovel dug its way ever deeper, water was up to his ankles and his new well would be a success, once it was finished.
“Orky diggin’ boss!”, Snikwort shouted from above, standing on the edge of the hole in the ground.
Ugluk stuck the shovel into the mud, “Toss down da rope, will ya!”.
“Orky!”
The rope hit Ugluk over the head and he let out a loud obscene curse, upon which he climbed up out of the would-be well.
“Sorry boss”, Snikwort said, one hand stroking the arm, the feet squirming innocently in the ground.
Ugluk simply grunted and spat in the dirt.
Engine noise caught everyone’s attention on the squig farm and all the gretchins and snotlings moved to see what it was.
Ugluk and Snikwort walked over to the edge of the farm, looking at the single plume of dust trailing a lone buggy heading their way at frightening speeds, bumping along in great jumps.
“Aghrukk?”, Snikwort said.
“Naah, da kamp is da other way. Dunno who dis is”.
The huge engine with four wheels strapped on slid in onto the yard of the farm, throwing up a great cloud of dust that engulfed the entire yard.
As soon as the dust settled, the smaller inhabitants of the squig farm dared to peek out from behind their hiding places.
Ugluk stepped out into the open, a crude blunderbuss held at the ready by his hip, “Alright yu bleedin’ git! Hands up!”.
“Not so fast yu big log! Dreg down will ya!”.
The gretchin behind the steeringwheel got up on his feet and pulled the thick driving-goggles of his goblinlike face.
“Gogg!!”, Ugluk roared, throwing the gun over his shoulder and walked up to the buggy.
“How yu doin’ yu runt?!”, Gogg said with a grin as he jumped out of the buggy and slapped Ugluk over the thigh as the ork approached.
“Fine, da squig farm rip offs orky enuff”.
“Glad to hear it. Now, wuzz doz a grot have to do to gets some drink around here?”.
Ugluk laughed, “A grod like yu dont have to do much!”, before Gogg had a chance to duck, Ugluk had picked him up and carried him off under his arm, the gretchin screaming and kicking as he tried to get free, but the strong ork simply kept up laughing, “Dats wuzz yu gets for gobin’ da boss of da farm!”.
Heading for the main building of the farm, Ugluk noticed Wagh’Durk coming out from the outhouse, pulling his pants up with some effort.
“Yu tuf git! Gets ‘em runts goin’!”.
The runtherder nodded and then started shouting orders at the grots and snots, the little goblins and gremlins hardly taking notice of the old drunk.
Two huge mugs of firewater were placed on the bolted metallic table and Gogg let out a satisfied sigh when he grabbed the mug with both hands, “I haven’t had a proper drink since I left Garg-Gorkdur”.
The gretchin drank several mouthfuls in one go, Ugluk sat down opposite the grot, grabbing the last mug with his huge hand, “Wuzz brings yer back dis far from da durslag?”.
Gogg wiped his mouth with the length of his arm after having placed the mug back on the table, “I hear things ar’ gettin’ ruff over here”.
“Oh?”.
“Dat miffgit of a boss yu have around here wuzz all over Garg-Gorkdur, bragin’ his git gob off about how he wuzz gunna dreg an’
duff Gaffrogg Grim’Boy an’ all of his kamp”.
“Sounds like Aghrukk”.
“Well, some of Gaffroggs boyz overheard dis az well”.
Ugluk stopped his drinking, returning the mug to the table, “So Gaffrogg an’ his boyz will be waitin’ for a stashy grubrukk?”.
“It feels like it, doesn’t it?”.
“Orky, I don’t mind if dat manik snot of a nob gets his kop smashed by Gaffrogg”, Ugluk took another swipe of his drink.
“Who does? But ordz of villuns an’ bad’uns will be comin’ here if a bad brawl an’ sum nosh scraps an’ teef ar’ promised”.
“So?”.
“So, if Gaffrogg duffs it all, he’s gunna dreg Da ‘Ard Knuckle Kamp”.
“Yer barkin’ I should boot off with ‘em an’ brawl wid Gaffrogg?”.
Gogg held his arms out and shrugged his shoulders, “Why not?”.
Ugluk shook his head, “Im da squigherder, wuzz orky thing could I do in a gargy brawl?”.
“Do yer think dat Aghrukk is boss enuff an’ has da grubb to duff Gaffrogg or his Waa of boyz?”.
Ugluk drank some more of the firewater, then gave it some thought, “Naa, not likely”.
“Then wuzz choice do yer have?”, Gogg took a sip of the strong drink, “To save yer farm, yu have to join da mob”.
“It would be smarter to shuv it all down an’ move to da slagdur”, Ugluk pointed out, taking another mouthful of the homemade brew.
“Smarter??”, Gogg was baffled, “But yer an ork?”.
“Ya... So?”.
“Well... Yer like a bad brawl”.
“Dunno, never been in wun”.
Gogg scratched his head, blinking his eyes, he never saw this turn of events coming, “So... Uh... Wuzz do yet want to do? Zag it or brawl it?”.
Ugluk stroked his chin, humming as he pondered the two options, his ork brain working hard to come up with a good decision.
“Ordz of nosh if wun duffs da brawl, right?”.
Gogg nodded, “Ya, lotz of ordz of nosh. An’ ordz of teef too”.
“An’ at da slagdur, ordz of villuns an’ bad’uns, ey?”.
“Ya, ordz of bosses”.
Ugluk made up his mind and finished the drink, slamming the mug down hard on the table, “Right, wun git boss is enuff for me.
Im stayin’ an’ Im brawlin’”.
3
Firebase • issue 3 • March 2007
A wicked grin spread across Goggs nasty looking face, “Den I has da purfect thing for yer to use”.
“Wuzz dat?”.
“Ordz an’ ordz of Dakka”.
Some three hundred orks, and maybe as many as eight hundred gretchin had gathered outside of the village known as Da ‘Ard Knuckles Kamp. The sound of orks growling, engines roaring and guns blasting at the sky could be heard miles around.
Trukks, buggies and bikes and trikes drove around everywhere, even the odd cyboar could be seen.
The promised scrap between Da ‘Ard Knuckles and Da Grim’Boys had attracted some of the meanest looking orks this part of the planet had to offer, all armed to the teeth with cleavers, homemade guns and shabby cybork mekaniks.
The noise of it all was deafening.
“Now dats a mob”, Snikwort said, looking up behind the shoulder of Ugluk, the gretchin hanging on to the ork as they rode on the boar.
Wagh’Druk sat on his own boar next to them, “Looks orky enuff, will have no gits wid causing some garg dreg”.
“Wasting wazzafluids, an’ da slugs”, Ugluk commented, seeing the vehicles constantly driving around and the guns being fired into the air.
Wagh’Durk looked at the younger ork.
Ugluk noticed the questioning expression of the runtherder,
“Won’t they need da wazzafluid an’ da slugs in da brawl?”.
“Doesn’t matter”, Wagh’Durk said, “If yer run out of slugs, just use da choppa, an’ if yer run out of wazzafluids, just stomp it”.
Ugluk nodded, it seemed logical enough, but he still couldn’t help but think that it would be better to preserve all that fuel and
ammunition to the real fight, instead of wasting it here at the village.
“Ar’ yer sure about dis boss?”, Snikwort asked, a bit worried at the sight of so many angry orks waiting for a big fight.
“We have to duff Gaffrogg, Snikwort. If we dont, he an’ hiz boyz will blitz out kamp an’ dreg da farm, itz da only way”.
Snikwort climbed over to the runtherders boar and Ugluk was just about to ride down to the gathered mob when Wagh’Durk stopped him, “Grubstash wun thing Ugluk”.
Ugluk looked over his shoulder at the old ork.
“When yu blast away wid da shootas, use long an’ uncontrolled bursts for da orkiest dakka, an’ when yu swing da choppa, swing it
‘ard an’ manik for da best grimgor”.
Ugluk nodded and grinned, “See ya around you grots”.
The ork kicked the sides of the boar with his heels and the beast shot off in a gallop down the hill towards the mob of bloodthirsty orks.
Snikwort looked down after his master from behind the runtherder’s shoulder, “Will he grim it?”.
Wagh’Durk smiled, showing of his few remaining teeth, “Dat boy will duff ‘em all”.
Dust obscured vision, the stench of fuel and gun smoke suppressed all other smells, the loud noise of orks and engines and guns locked out all other sounds.
Orks and trukks were everywhere, grots running around, climbing trukks and buggies, shootas and sluggas firing one round after the other straight into the air.
Ugluk made his way through the warthirsting mob, pulling the boar along behind him with the reins, carrying a large object in his other hand, the thing hidden from sight under a big leather canopy tied around it.
“Yer nevva gunna keep up wid da rest of us on dat thing yu naff ork!”, an ork said from behind the two sticks that acted as steering for a massive trukk.
Ugluk took a look at his boar, then turned to face the driver,
“Wuzz it to yu?”.
“Yu wants a badgrim zagrukk, gets yer bum up ‘ere!”, the driver shouted back at him.
Ugluk took a look at the back of the trukk, it was overcrowded already with orks in shabby armor, all armed with shootas and even bigger kannons, many of them trying to shoot down the sky, all of them roaring like a thunderstorm.
Gretchins climbed along the sides, trying to find the best spot where you could be safe and still take potshots at the enemy.
“Well, well!”, a roaring voice was heard over the deafening noise of the gathering mob.
Ugluk turned and saw Aghrukk ‘Ard Knuckle himself sitting on top of a large trike behind the ork driver, the boss holding a huge choppa in the one hand and a double-barreled shoota in the other.
“If it isnt dat git of a squigherder, Ugluk!”, Aghrukk laughed,
“Wuzz ar’ yu doin’ ‘ere anyways?! Dis is a mob for da boyz, not a mob for da grots an’ snots!”.
Ugluk sneered and spat on the frontwheel of the trike, the gob of spit clearly upsetting the driver, “Im an ork of dis kamp aswell!”, he shouted back at the boss.
Aghrukk laughed even louder, “Yu may be an ork Ugluk, but dat dont make yer wun of da boyz!”, the boss laughed even more and kicked the driver over the back of his head, a clear signal for the ork driver to get moving.
The wheels spun and the trike made a quick turn where it stood and drove off in a cloud of dust, Aghrukks laughter raised over the noise of the trukks and orks.
Ugluk growled openly, he hated the boss more than anything and wouldn’t mourn if the fool got himself killed in the up and coming fight.
“Yu comin’?!”, the trukkdriver shouted down after him.
Ugluk spat at the ground, turned and heaved the heavy sack in his hand up among the other orks on the trukk, then climbed up, pulling himself over the wooden fence around the flat platform of the trailer.
Aghrukk’s trike left the large mob and stopped some thirty feet away from them, he stood up in his seat and looked over his shoulder at the orks that had gathered to join his party of destruction.
Raising his slugga in the air, he fired a massive burst of fist like bullets at the sky, roaring in triumph at the orks under his command.
“WAAAAGH!!!!”
The entire mob acted as one, blasting away at the clouds with every gun in their arsenal, waving choppas above their heads, letting their bestial throats let out a ground shaking roar.
“WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!!!!!!!”.
The huge mob of trukks, bikes and trikes shot off in the same direction on a broad front, every driver racing the ones next to him in a bet to get to the fighting first, leaving in their wake a torn up landscape of mud, dust and deep going wheeltracks.
Ugluk felt the wind hitting his face, his ears flapping, his cheeks trembling.
As the trukk hit bumps and rocks it shook violently in the great speeds it was traveling in and Ugluk held a firm grip on the construction of the vehicle.
Being here, in the middle of this mob, orks roaring, engines spewing smoke and fire, guns blazing at nothing, triggers pulled for the only reason of causing as much noise as possible, Ugluk felt alive, his heart pounding, his eyes glowing, his mind vibrating,
Firebase • issue 3 • March 2007
or maybe it vibrated because of the shaky ride, no matter, Ugluk knew that this was the proper life for an ork.
He only hoped the brawl would live up to his expectations.
The sixty or so vehicles moved in a disorganised teardrop-shaped bundle, no-one was racing each other anymore, the drivers sat lazily in their seats keeping the throttle at a decent cruising speed.
The orks they carried along in their trukks and buggies and on their bikes weren’t as agitated as well like they had been some hours earlier, now they all sat slumped and sleeping, or leaned against the rides in boredom, watching the landscape rush them by.
The trukk rocked as it hit an old dead log, the rotten wood splintering under the advancing machine.
Ugluk woke from his slumber, he rubbed his face with a strong hand and then got up on his feet, the trukk he was riding in was located in the middle of the warband, surrounded by the rest of the crude vehicles.
The terrain was that of rolling hills, snaking streams and spread out boulders and clumps of trees and bushes.
‘Not da baddest of trukk-land’, the ork thought to himself, and he was right, the orks of Aghrukk ‘Ard Knuckle soon had spread out far and wide as they avoided boulders and trees, gulleys and ditches.
Ugluk leaned down over to the driver infront of him, “How much longer ‘til we reach dem naff gits Da Grim’Boyz?!”.
The ork doing the driving shrugged his shoulders, “How should I know, I’m just ‘ere for da brawlin’!”.
Ugluk grunted and pulled himself back up on the trailer, he surveyed the advancing mob and the landscape around them, ever changing his footing as the uneven ride constantly threatened to toss him on his back.
He noticed something out of place further ahead. A clump of trees up on a hill some miles ahead, there was something wrong with the undergrowth, the light passing through the trees from behind was cut out in a strange way, unnatural even.
Ugluk locked his eyes on the peculiar grove, trying to figure out what it was that was so wrong with it.
“Looks like a trukk”, he mumbled as he scratched his bald head, then it dawned on him, “DA SKUM!!!”, all the orks on the trukk woke up from their daydreaming and focused their attention on Ugluk, the shouting ork pointing at something up ahead.
KA-BOOM!!!
A massive ball of black smoke rushed out from the large hill, now only a half a mile away and before any of Aghrukks orks had time to react a large explosion sent dirt, mud, rocks and a few buggies and trikes flying.
“WAAAAAAAAGH!!!!”
The orkish roar echoed over the roar of the engines as trukks and buggies along with traks and bikes came flying down from ridges and out of hiding behind hills and bushes.
The two ambushing forces slammed in without remorse into both flanks of Aghrukk’s spread out forces, blasting away with every gun in the arsenal, turning trukks and buggies into scrap and sending orks flying through the air, riddled with bullet holes.
Guns were blazing, orks yelling and roaring, engines puffing smoke and flames, wheels dug up tracks and ditches behind them, mud was tossed high into the air, dark green blood splattered all over.
It was soon chaos as the orks of Aghrukk and Gaffrogg and their vehicles mixed it up in the rough terrain, blasting at everything that moved with no regards if it was friend or foe.
The orks howled with furious rejoice, the gretchins shrieked out of horrid fear, everyone was spending ammunition as fast as they could.
Ugluk kept his head down, holding on in the tight turns and hard knocks the trukk was put through, the strained engine shaking the entire structure of the trukk.
All around the orks roared and fired their sluggas and shootas, blood was flowing freely on the trailer, moving in waves with every turn made by the driver.
The ork standing next to Ugluk crashed over him, Ugluk growled and shoved him off, the ork landing in a limp pile next to him, the ork’s body torn apart by gaping fist sized holes on his torso.
Bullets ricocheted around Ugluk’s head and he flinched as he heard them whizz past his head.
He lost his balance and fell on his rear when the trukk collided with one of the enemy’s own trukks.
‘Enuff of dis!’, he thought, with adrenaline pumping he reached over to his bag made from a leather canopy and ripped off the ropes around it with his strong hands and arms, then he pulled off the canopy itself.
The head of one of the orks next to him came apart in a fountain of green goo and the dead ork flew off the trukk, crashing violently into a waiting boulder.
Ugluk adjusted his footing on the blood soaked floor, and raised his gun with both hands holding a firm grip.
His quad-barreled ‘eavy shoota was about to get its baptism of fire.
A red painted buggy jumped through the air, two great jet flames hissing from its rear, it landed and bounced along, the driver laughing like a madman, the ork behind him shouting obscene phrases at everyone and everything as he pumped out the large solid slugs of his twin big shoota.
Ugluk took rough aim as the buggy came his way and pulled the
Ugluk took rough aim as the buggy came his way and pulled the