Garth Brooks from the song
“How You Ever Gonna Know”
Perseverance (as defined by the American Heritage Dictionary):
1. Steady persistence in adhering to a course of action, a belief, or a purpose; steadfastness.
The Baby
Who ever said life was easy? This has to be one of the dumbest things I’ve ever heard. Easy for who? The truth is, life can be a bitch regardless of who you are. Everyone has tough times.
Just the other day someone told me life is so easy for kids: They don’t have to work, pay bills, or deal with the other stresses of life. All I could think to myself is, “Oh really?” Then I told her that I have a nine-month-old at home and life is far from easy for him. I bet he would gladly trade places with her. She rolled her eyes and could not believe what I was saying. Then I asked her to imagine going to a foreign country where she did
not understand a bit of the language, where she had to crawl everywhere she wanted to go, could not dress herself, had to wear a diaper, could not speak to tell anyone what she wanted, gums always hurt because of teeth tearing through them, had to drink out of a bottle, and had to eat pretty much the same stuff every day. Now tell me—how bad is your life really? You think you have problems? Her reply: “That’s different. He’s just a baby and does not know any better.” I then told her maybe they don’t know better, but they deal with it and keep moving forward. Not only that, but they also spend the rest of the time with a huge grin on their face and are as happy as anyone on this earth could be. They do not rehash how bad things are, over and over, all day long. They have no choice but to move forward—quitting is not an option. It takes a few years to learn that skill. We are all brought into this world with a very strong desire for persistence. How many times did you fall down be-fore you walked? The correct answer is, “Until I began to walk.”
It does not matter how many times you fall but how many more times you get up. Life can be hard—it’s supposed to be.
To accomplish your goals and be successful you have to have a very strong desire to keep moving forward and never quit when the road gets tough.
Twisted
It was a cold winter Sunday afternoon. As with most Sundays during the football season, I would watch a few quarters of football on TV and then make my way outside to join up with the corner football game. There was always something going on: football during football season, basketball, baseball, soc-cer all year round. You could find yourself with 10 other kids knocking each other around. The ages of the kids could range from 16 down to seven or eight. It did not matter how old you
Dave Tate
were, only if you could play the game. This really didn’t matter either, as new rules were being invented all the time.
I could not have been more than six or seven years old and was one of the smaller guys in the group. I still remember how cold it was, and I was all dressed up for the occasion. I had my huge winter coat, hat, gloves, and the rubber boots that went over my tennis shoes. I still have no idea why I had to wear bread bags around my feet as well, but I was ready to go. I was so jacked up in clothes that I looked like the little boy from A Christmas Story.
The game was going very well and the extra clothes turned out to be a great thing, as I could not feel how hard the ground was after getting smashed by kids twice my size. A few plays later, as I was running across the yard, I tripped over a sewer-drain hole and twisted my ankle. The pain was unreal; I thought I had broken my ankle. I left the game right away and made my way home. My dad was still sitting in his chair watching the game as I made my way crying into the house and stripped off my winter gear. My mom asked me what had happened. I told her I had broken my ankle on the sewer drain. My dad called me into the family room and asked to see how bad it was. I hobbled over his way and proceeded to take my boots off. After a minute of him tugging and twisting my ankle, he told me to put my win-ter gear back on and go back out to the game. I told him again that I had a broken ankle and could not walk. I was informed that I had only twisted my ankle and that I needed to go back outside, walk it off ,and get back in the game. Once more I told him that I could not walk. “Go back, walk it off, and get back in the game!” I put my coat and boots back on and, with tears still running down my face, made my way back outside, walked it off, and got back in the game. I believe we played for another few hours until I came back in. Nothing else was said about it when I came back home. Nothing needed to be said.
Lesson Learned
Some of you may be thinking, “I can’t believe this! That’s no way to treat a kid, especially one who was hurt. I can’t believe he forced you to go back and play hurt when you were at such a young age. You should have stayed in and put ice on it to keep the swelling down.” This is very common thinking and why most our kids end up spoiled, gutless, and messed up. This was not about my ankle. Yes, I should have gotten off it. Yes, there should have been ice on it. Yes, it should have been el-evated. But what would this really have taught me? If would have taught me to quit when things got tough. It would have taught me to stop when something hurt. It would have taught me to run home every time something happened. It would have taught me to give in to the pain. But what that treatment did, in fact, teach me was to go back, walk it off, and get back in the game. In other words, it taught me perseverance.
There are many components to persistence in pursuit of suc-cess. There is much more to it then sticking around and trying over and over. That’s easy for anyone to do. There are many things along the way that will make you want to quit, force you to quit, cause you pain, set you back, and make your life a living hell. Being persistent in achieving your goals means overcom-ing all the obstacles you run into along the way. Trust me when I tell you that all the pain and hell you have to go through is always worth it in the end. Just make sure you’re suffering for what you really want and believe in.
Quitting
I still believe that quitting is a bad thing and that you should always finish what you set out to do. I am very hardheaded
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about this one. I also do realize that many athletes may not have the genetics and skills to make it in their sport of choice.
I don’t think genetics matter in sports. I know there are many coaches freaking out right now. Yes, genetics do matter, and there are many professional athletes that have succeeded with very little work. I know you can’t make a jackass a racehorse, but don’t tell that to the jackass that’s a racehorse in its mind.
Here’s my point: Most athletes will never make it to the pro-fessional level, so the most important thing is to have a good time. This is really why we get involved in sports in the first place. If you’re an athlete not suited for a specific sport but who still loves the game, then by all means—stick it out and give it your best shot. The road will be much harder, but we’ve all seen examples of athletes not suited for a specific sport who nevertheless make it to the top through hard work and determination.
Fishing with Dad
I remember fishing with my dad as a kid. My father had a pas-sion for fishing, hunting, and golf. These were all too relaxed for me. I would rather have run the golf course, swam in the lake, and chopped down trees in the woods. I do not have the composure for leisurely sports. While out on the lake, I would get bored out of my mind. I did like it when I got a fish on the line because that’s where the action started. It would last for five minutes and then we would wait what seemed like forever for it to happen again. I remember many trips where we would be on the lake for what seemed like hours and I was ready to quit for the day. I may have tossed the line a hundred times and not gotten one bite. Over and over I would have no luck or any indication that fish were even in the lake at all. But I knew that, if I quit for the day, I had a 100% chance of not catching
anything. But, if I tossed my line out one more time, then my chances would go up—and then I would get a strike, just after I was about ready to quit. If I’d known there would be a fish with my next catch, I would never have thought of quitting. If I’d known that even on cast No. 102 I’d get a fish, I would never have thought of quitting. You know what? Life doesn’t work that way. If it did, everyone would have fish on the line. You may have success with your first cast, or your fiftieth. You never know unless you toss the line out.
Here’s a poem I’ve carried in my wallet since I was 12 years old.
It’s my daily reminder to never quit when things get tough. I can’t count the number of times I’ve pulled this out when I was ready to give up. It helped me totally change my focus from feeling sorry for myself to “getting back in the game”:
Dave Tate
DON’T QUIT!
When things go wrong as they sometimes will When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill When the funds are low and the debts are high And you want to smile, but you have to sigh
When care is pressing you down a bit Rest, if you must, but don’t you quit.
Life is queer, with its twists and turns As everyone of us sometimes learns
And many a failure turns about
When he/she might have won had he/she stuck it out Don’t give up though the pace seems slow
You may succeed with another blow.
Success is failure turned inside out The silver tint of the clouds of doubt And you never can tell how close you are
It may be near when it seems so far So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit It’s when things seem worst that you must not quit.
Author unknown
Chapter Ten