Learning one or two things is good enough

A further step in the process of FDR is participation in group education sessions, with ex-partners attending sessions separately. Education sessions are facilitated by FDR practitioners and place a particular focus on the needs of children following parental separation. Although FRCs may differ in their provision of education sessions, there was a consistent focus across the three locations chosen for this study. Education sessions include topics such as strategies for coping with separation, the importance of discussing parental issues away from children, developing parenting plans that consider

the developmental stages of children, family violence and the value of taking a less adversarial approach to resolving issues. Harman (2019) asserts that ‘Therapeutic intervention, support, and educative assistance may be necessary to assist parents heal from trauma or to affect behavioural change or attitudinal shift before a child-focused agreement can be reached’ (p. 15).

These topics are facilitated by an FDR practitioner in a two-hour session, which can potentially change a parent’s behaviours and thought processes. Hunter and

Commerford (2015) argue that

Communication is considered in relationship education to be a feature of

relationships that can be changed to lead to immediate and future improvements in relationship quality. In other words, communication is one of the “potentially modifiable variables that predict relationship outcomes” (Halford &

Bodenmann, 2013, p. 513)’ (p. 5). However, as Taylor (2005) suggests,

Change does not occur immediately. The philosophy behind the requirement of parenting-after-divorce . . . education programs is to expose the parents to the information that will aid and guide them and their children in their post-divorce adjustment. It is hoped that some change will be immediate, however

realistically it’s known that some will complete the requirement just because it’s a requirement. (p. 77)

Education sessions held at the FRCs in this research included topics such as Parenting after Separation (Location 1), Building Connections (Location 2) and Parenting Orders Program (Location 3). Although there are different names for programs, as Kitzmann et al. (2012) suggest, ‘there are often many similarities in programs designed to prepare parents for mediation’ (p. 2). Parents attend education

sessions separately to their ex-partners. The rationale for the use of mixed-gender groups in education sessions is to eliminate any issues with family violence and, as suggested by Kochanski (2011), to give parents the freedom to exchange ideas without having their ex-partner present.

Parents expressed different perspectives to practitioners about the purpose and benefits of education sessions. For parents, having the opportunity to participate in a mixed-gender group and being able to express their experiences was valuable. Andrew (Parent, Location 2) felt that ‘there were many services available for mothers but not fathers who have separated’. However, by participating in the education sessions, he was provided the opportunity to spend time with others who had similar concerns to him and became aware of the support available to fathers. Andrew went on to describe his new insights about how his ex-partner might be feeling. The knowledge gained by participating in mixed-gender education sessions facilitated a sense of satisfaction and hope because other parents were experiencing similar feelings:

[I hoped it] . . . helped their situation a little bit because they definitely did with me . . . the group enabled me not to feel so alone and to realise that there were other parents in similar situations . . . having mixed genders in the education session was enlightening and provided the opportunity to hear different

perspectives and talk amongst the group . . . they heard me out, I heard them out . . . it was like an [Alcoholics Anonymous] meeting . . . where you sit around and talk. (Andrew—Parent, Location 2)

Irrespective of location, there were differences between parents’ and practitioners’ understanding of the purpose, the format and necessity of education sessions. Practitioners mentioned three significant benefits in providing education sessions for parents. First, education sessions assisted parents to change their current

adversarial thinking and provided practitioners with the opportunity to shift parents’ thinking. According to Jane (FDR practitioner, Location 2), ‘people do a 180-degree turnaround in attitude after those education sessions’. Second, education sessions allowed parents to obtain new information to create changes in their thinking. One FDR practitioner suggested that parents ‘obtain new information and that even learning one or two things from the education session . . . is good enough because it starts to turn the wheel’ (Craig—FDR practitioner, Location 1). Third, older parents in education

sessions can share their experiences with younger members of the group. FDR practitioners noticed that a parent may be more inclined to listen to advice from older parents than to the same advice from the group presenter. Suggesting that periodically there may be ‘heroes’ in the room, the exchange of information between parents was expressed by Joanne (FDR practitioner, Location 2) as, ‘I’ve seen it work beautifully where the 40-year-old man says to the 18-year-old man…’.

Although education sessions at FRCs are compulsory (AGD, 2019), FDR practitioners in this research were committed to ensuring parents attended them. To cater for the availability of parents, education sessions were held on both evenings and days of alternate weeks. Parents who had attempted FDR on previous occasions expressed their reluctance to reattend education sessions, despite their availability. However, having done so, ‘new learning was gained’, although Helen (Parent, Location 1) did question the validity of a ‘blanket decision’ to impose education sessions on all parents.

When encouraging parents to participate in the education session, Maryanne (FDR practitioner, Location 1) experienced that some parents were ‘defensive and reactive’ and ‘felt surprised’ that parents would have such a reaction to the information she was providing. The rules for parents attending education sessions as they prepared

for FDR varied between the three FRCs. At Location 1, practitioners implied that it was compulsory for parents to attend the education session. When encouraging parents to attend, Samson (FDR practitioner, Location 1) suggested practitioners do not always tell the truth to parents about education session attendance:

A lot of people say, ‘Do I have to do the education process?’ We usually don’t tell the absolute truth, and we say, ‘Yes, look, that’s part of our process, both parties agree to do it, and we think it’s an important part of the preparation, and it is an important part’.

At Location 2, attendance at education sessions was voluntary for parents. Parents were given an alternative option to work one-on-one with a practitioner, although

practitioners did not give explanations for the criteria to work individually with parents. FDR practitioners at Location 3 did not mention their views on the necessity of parents to attend education sessions.

FDR practitioners at Location 3 commented that they were continually thinking of new ways to provide information and education to parents, particularly for those who were isolated or illiterate. This prompted FDR practitioners to think of innovative ways of delivering the education sessions other than didactically. Maryanne (FDR

practitioner, Location 1) remarked that there are ‘those parents that cannot read the written material’ and went on to suggest there are also parents who do not understand the information provided.

According to the 2010–2011 report by ANAO (2010):

Providers of services in the family law arena [are to be] aware that increasingly, clients have a preference to access information remotely and digitally, yet still enjoy a personalised service experience; [therefore], service providers may have to adapt their service provision to meet these needs. (p. 43)

At Location 3, FDR practitioners were trialling the use of social media to provide education, but this was still in the development stage at the time of the research interviews. Although FDR practitioners recognised the need to provide a variety of ways to present education sessions to parents, delivery is currently didactic and supplemented with printed material.

FDR practitioners in Location 2 highlighted that they provided education sessions that met the cultural needs of Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islanders, although cultural considerations were not mentioned at either Location 1 or Location 3.

According to the Operational Framework for Family Relationship Centres (AGD, 2019), ‘Indigenous outreach services are located within FRCs in specified areas of high- need or with significant Indigenous communities to contribute to enhanced Indigenous service delivery’ (p. 10). FDR practitioners at Locations 1 and 3 did not provide culturally sensitive education sessions because the prevailing client population and demographics of those regional centres did not require it.

View of parents differed from those of FDR practitioners on the value and necessity of education sessions. For parents, education sessions provided a sense of universality and enabled a sharing and understanding of other parents’ experiences of separation and gender differences regarding emotions and parenting arrangements. For FDR practitioners, the value of education sessions was twofold: first, to inform parents about the effects of conflict on children, and second, to encourage parents to take a different approach to enhance preparation and facilitate parental agreement. Lawyers did not comment on education sessions as part of preparing for FDR.

Theme 2 has explored participants’ experiences of participating in education sessions. The positive experiences parents mentioned may be because interviews were

conducted prior to the joint FDR session and during a period in which parents were being supported on an individual basis by the FDR practitioner.

From this research, two aspects of education have become evident as being beneficial to parents as they prepare for FDR. First, parents and FDR practitioners have a different focus in the purpose of the education sessions. Parents seek the collegiality of other parents experiencing difficulties so they may share their experiences. In attending education sessions, parents expressed that they felt less isolated and appreciated the different responses to separation and post-separation parenting from men and women. In contrast, FDR practitioners hoped the education sessions would generate changes in parents’ behaviour, believing this could be achieved by educating parents on the developmental needs of children and the effects of entrenched conflict. The emphasis for FDR practitioners to provide education on the effects of conflict may be attributed to the extensive work by Dr Jennifer McIntosh, who has written widely on the detrimental effects of conflict on children.

Second, although FDR practitioners endeavoured to develop new ideas on how to present education sessions, they had limited expertise in catering for parents who were illiterate or had difficulty understanding the content of the information provided. FDR practitioners, particularly those at Location 1, provided printed material to parents and spent time ‘working through the booklet’, although practitioners at Location 1 were those that highlighted that many parents may, in fact, be illiterate.

Given the varying needs of parents, Marcy (2001) suggests that ‘adult learners have differing ways of gathering, processing, interpreting, organising and thinking about information’ (p. 118). Practitioners identified that parents acquire information differently in the education sessions—therefore, it may be beneficial for information to be relayed to parents in a variety of ways. Parents and FDR practitioners both

appreciated the benefits of education sessions; however, each had different expectations about their current purpose and format and the necessity of parents to attend.