Lexical additions

completely unfamiliar to the TT readers at graphic level. TT 22, though in an organic form, also stands out because of its layout in columnar format.

Overall, the shape of verse passages is a source of textual effects; when the translated text is presented in poetic forms, it stands as a reminder that the ST is composed in traditional Thai verse, not prose. Purely on the visual level, the switch from prose into verse from time to time in the translation automatically forces the readers to take notice of the shape of what they read.

4.4 Shifts

All twenty-four verse passages do not reveal systematic translation patterns. However, shifts, mostly on a microstructural level and some on macrostructural level, are discernible in two verse forms, mimetic and analogical verse forms. However, most shifts occur in the analogical form, which can be expected since the majority of verse passages are in analogical form. The translators are not professional translators. They are academics by profession. While undertaking this translation project, they did not translate full-time. The lack of experience in literary translation seems to play a major part in the textual outcome.

The shifts detected on a microstructural level can be found in words, clauses and sentences and the shifts on a macrostructural level can be detected in the changes in characters, events, time and other meaningful components.

The shifts deriving from the decision-making processes of the translators will be classified as (i) microstructural shifts and (ii) macrostructural shifts. In the first category, lexical additions and generalisation will be discussed and in the second category, mistranslation will be identified. In case of the shifts at macrostructural level, socio-cultural analysis will be incorporated into the analysis of the meaning and function of the lexical choices in the ST and TT.

4.4.1 Microstructural shifts

4.4.1.1 Lexical additions

Lexical additions, sometimes due to poetic constraints, are found in two verse forms, a mimetic and an analogical verse form.

In TT 23, a mimetic form, to comply with the Thai metre, a series of rhyme is needed and the translators had to choose specific descriptions (‘hill and dale’ and ‘cock and quail’) rather than generic terms as used in the ST to imitate the form of the original. In the second hemistich of TT 23, the word singkhon (สิงขร) means the top of a hill while the words ‘hill and dale’ are chosen for its rhyme as follows:

ST: บุกแฝกแหวกคาหว่างสิงขร (buk fak whaek kha whang singkhon) (KCKP, 1917/2012, p. 698) TT: through grass and reed, by hill and dale (Baker and Pasuk, 2012, p. 836)

Because of the translation choice ‘hill and dale’, the image in the mind of the TT readers will also include a valley, especially in northern England because of its association with geography in that region. Because of the decision to add the word ‘dale’ in the TT, the rhyme created through the chosen word (dale) subsequently forces the translators to add meaning in the fourth hemistich.

In the fourth hemistich of TT 23, the word paksin (ปักษิน) means birds in general but the TT specifies the types of birds (cock and quail) to create a rhyme as can be seen in the following hemistich:

ST: ปักษินบินร่อนเข้ารังราย (pak-sin bin ron khao rang rai) (KCKP, 1917/2012, p. 698) TT: cock and quail flying to find their nest (Baker and Pasuk, 2012, p. 836)

Lexical additions are also found in an analogical form. In TT 12 the added word (‘lovely’ in ‘lovely cell’) is not needed for its rhyme whereas in TT 17, also an analogical form, the additions (‘great’ and

‘unblessed’) are needed for the creation of both alliteration and assonance.

In the eleventh hemistich of TT 12, the ST does not use any adjective to modify the novice’s cell. It actually simply mentions that Phlai Kaeo (later Khun Phaen) returns, without pinpointing to any specific place as follows:

ST: พอเห็นสีกาแล้วกลับไป (pho hen si-ka laeo klap pai) (KCKP, 1917/2012, p. 58) TT: sees her, returns to his lovely cell (Baker and Pasuk, 2012, p. 85)

The cultural context is clear to the ST readers that the Buddhist novices leave the temples to receive alms, generally cooked meals, in front of the offerers’ houses and bring the foods back to the temples.

The English text specifies the place (the cell) where the novice (young Khun Phaen) can spend time pining for Phim (later Wanthong), which is something a novice or a monk should not be doing. The English text adds ‘lovely’ to describe the state of the cell and most of the time, the cell of a novice is

hardly ‘lovely’. This added adjective can be seen as an attempt to lengthen the hemistich which distorts the reality, the real state of the novice’s habitation.

In another analogial form, the first hemistich of TT 17 also reveals lexical addition as follows:

ST: พระภูธรไปค้างอยู่กลางไพร (phra phu-thon pai khang yu klang phrai) (KCKP, 1917/2012, p. 394) TT: The king made camp in the great forest (Baker and Pasuk, 2012, p. 460)

The words klang phrai (กลางไพร) are rendered as ‘great forest’. ‘Great’ is an addition; no adjective is used to describe the forest in the ST. The word klang (กลาง) literally means ‘in the middle’. Literal translation of the words klang phrai is ‘in the middle of the forest’. A lexcial addition ‘great’ allows the translators to create a poetic effect through the rhyme ‘great/forest.’

The fourth hemistich of TT 17 produces another lexical addition that is easily detected as follows:

ST: จะยกทัพกลับเข้าพระเวียงชัย (ja yok thap klap khao phra wiang chai) (KCKP, 1917/2012, p. 394) TT: and marched back to the city, unblessed (Baker and Pasuk, 2010, p. 460)

In the formal matrix, apart from graphic/phonic level, intertextual level is pertinent to the analysis of this hemistich. It deals with external relations to other texts in a given culture. Given that no part of any text exists in total isolation from other texts, Hervey and Higgins (2002, p. 124) propose the term

‘intertextual level’, referring to the level of textual variables on which texts are viewed as bearing significant external relations to other texts in a given culture or cultures. Translators of literary works must assess the relevance of intertextual features and avoid unintentionally introducing inappropriate intertextual features (ibid., p. 128).

TT 17 is about Khun Chang’s recitation of a play, Chaiyachet, a story adapted into a drama by King Rama II. The translators relate the story in the footnote. They refer to Prince Chaiyachet’s hunt for a phueak (albino) elephant, which is a ploy to get him out of the palace.

The TT contains the word ‘unblessed’ whereas the ST has no such word. The translators add this word to create the rhyme ‘quest/unblessed’. The meaning is added to, for the benefit of rhythm. The word ‘unblessed’ leads the readers to believe that if one cannot find this particular type of elephant, one is not endowed with divine favour and protection.

4.4.1.2 Generalisation

The words used in the TTs are generalised in two different ways. First, the synonyms in the ST are not kept in the TT; two words carrying almost the same meanings in Thai are translated into one English word. Secondly, the terms that can be considered as CSIs are rendered by hyperonyms.

TT 1, a mimetic form, and TT 17, an analogical form, contain generalised synonyms in different aspects whereas TT 15, TT 16 and TT 24, all in analogical form, have a hyponym that is replaced by a hyperonym.

In TT 1, there are three verbs referring to specific gestures of greeting or showing respect, ‘wai’ (ไหว้),

‘cha-li-kon’ (ชลีกร), and ‘a-phi-wan’ (อภิวันท์) that are equated with ‘respect’, ‘clasped hands’, and

‘heads bowed’ respectively.

The first hemistich of TT 1 refers to the act of ‘wai’ (ไหว้), which is performed by pressing one’s palms against each other and bowing one’s head. The translators have dropped the action of ‘wai’ but kept the intention of this action, which is ‘respect’ in the TT as follows:

ST: ครั้นว่าไหว้ครูแล้วจับบท (khran wa wai khru laeo jap bot) (KCKP, 1917/2012, p. 1) TT: Respect to teachers has been paid (Baker and Pasuk, 2012, p. 1)

The word ‘wai’, a CSI, is used repeatedly in the story. The translators equate ‘wai’ with respect in this verse passage but they use the transliterated form ‘wai’ without italicising it when this word appears again and again in prose translation. Moreover, they also use the translation ‘wai’ for any other Thai verbs that refer to the same action in prose translation. However, cultural borrowing procedure is not employed in this verse passage, not when other Thai verbs that carry the same meaning as ‘wai’ are used as follows:

ST: ชลีกรอ่อนเกล้าอภิวันท์ (cha-li-kon on klao a-phiwan) (KCKP, 1917/2012, p. 1) TT: in humility clasped hands, heads bowed (Baker and Pasuk, 2012, p. 1)

The twelfth hemistich of TT 1 begins with the verb ‘cha-li-kon’ which has the same meaning as ‘wai’ (to press one’s palms against each other to pay respect), used in the first hemistich of TT 1. The translators have explained the action by rendering it as ‘clasped hands’ which might not create the same mental picture in the reader’s mind. This hemisitch ends with the the verb ‘a-phi-wan’. According to the Royal Institute Dictionary B.E. 2542 (2003, p. 1374), ‘a-phi-wan’ means ‘krap wai’; ‘krap’ means to prostrate and the meaning of ‘wai’ is already explained. To prostrate, one sits, press one’s palms,

and bow one’s head down to the floor. In TT 1, ‘a-phi-wan’ has been rendered as ‘heads bowed’, that being the case, the meaning of ‘a-phi-wan’ is not fully delivered in English. If ST 1 would have been translated into prose, where rhymes and rhythm can be abandoned, the meaning of ‘a-phi-wan’ may have been fully rendered. In addition, ‘wai’ may have been used for the translation of both ‘wai’ and

‘cha-li-kon’, the translation choice for when wai and its synonyms are used in prose translation in this poem.

When ‘wai’ and ‘cha-li-kon’ are used in the segment that is translated into a mimetic verse form,

‘cultural borrowing proper’ procedure, as one viable solution, is discarded and culture-neutral words are employed instead in TT 1. This decision is made based on the poetic constraints imposed upon by klon paet metre. To use the loan word ‘wai’ in the mimetic verse form, the series of rhymes would not have been created strictly according to the klon paet metre.

In TT 17, the trace of the synonyms ‘chang’ (an elephant) and ‘khotchasan’ (a big elephant) is erased in the TT. Moreover, the special characteristic of the elephant called ‘phueak’ (เผือก) is translated by a more general TL term ‘white’. The ST term has its equivalent in English ‘albino’, which can be used to describe an abnormally white animal or plant.

The following hemistich contains synonyms denoting animals that are deemed propitious as follows:

ST: อันพระยาช้างเผือกคชสาร (an phraya chang phueak khotchasan) (KCKP, 1917/2012, p. 394) TT: to hunt the noble white elephant (Baker and Pasuk, 2012, p. 460)

Both synonyms chang and khotchasan (both mean elephant but khotchasan can also mean a big elephant) have not been kept in the TT. Phraya is a noble title and is used with this phueak elephant.

The cultural significance of phueak elephants is described solely by the word ‘noble’. The word

‘phueak’ means abnormally white, not simply ‘white’.

In the first chapter of the story, the three main characters are introduced and the birth of Khun Chang is annotated in the footnote as follows:

Chang means elephant. Elephants with unusual colouring, and especially those with albino characteristics, were deemed highly auspicious, especially for kings. Anyone finding such an animal was bound by law to present it to the king, and often was richly rewarded (ibid., p. 5).

The year Khun Chang is born, a phueak elephant is presented to the king, therefore he is named as such to commemorate this event. The significance of phueak elephants is explained through a

paratexual element. The translators maintain the translation ‘white’ for phueak throughout the translation whereas ‘albino’ could better describe the appearance of chang phueak.

In TT 15, the name of a Thai dessert ‘kha-nom pla krim’ (ขนมปลากริม) is dropped in the TT and is referred to as just a ‘dessert’ as follows:

ST: เจ้าขนมปลากริมของพี่อา (jao kha-nom pla krim khong phi a) (KCKP, 1917/2012, p. 206) TT: be gratified, dessert of mine? (Baker and Pasuk, 2012, p. 258)

The type of dessert is ‘pla krim’. It is explained in the footnote. The translators also offer a literally translated version of this segment in the footnote and call this dessert ‘krim-fish dessert’. The word ‘pla’

means fish and the name derives from the shape of rice flour that is rolled into fish-like shape to be cooked in coconut milk and palm sugar. This is a comic passage showing Khun Chang’s awkward attempt in composing love poems. He compares his love to a very common dessert ‘pla krim’. To court a woman, it is not flattering to compare her to a dessert that features any type of fish. Even if the TT readers cannot conjure up the image of ‘pla krim’, if the name in Thai is kept in this verse passage, Khun Chang’s poetic abilities, the lack thereof, would possibly have been portrayed in the verbal text.

In TT 16, the term of endearment ‘thon jan’ (ท่อนจันทน์) is translated as ‘club of wood’ and ‘sandal’, the type of wood mentioned in the ST, is excluded in the TT as follows:

ST: เจ้าท่อนจันทน์ขวัญตาพิลาลด (jao thon jan khwan-ta phi-la-lot) (KCKP, 1917/2012, p. 222) TT: I miss you darling club of wood (Baker and Pasuk, 2012, p. 276)

The whole fifth hemistich in TT 16 demonstrates the use of terms of endearment in Thai poetry. The ST contains the word ‘phi-la-lot’ (พิลาลด) which means ‘to want, yearn for, be filled with passion’ and it is translated as ‘I miss you’. The words ‘club of wood’ is a literal translation of ‘thon’ (ท่อน), however, the type of wood is missing in the TT. The word that specifies the type is the word ‘jan’ (จันทน์), which can be translated as ‘sandalwood’. The word ‘khwan-ta’ is another term of endearment which is replaced by ‘darling’ in the TT.

In TT 24, the last verse passage, a specific type of ghost ‘phi pong’ (ผีโป่ง) is reduced to just ‘spirits’ as follows:

ST: แต่ล้วนผีโป่งป่าคาแขมรก (tae luan phi pong pa kha khaem rok) (KCKP, 1917/2012, p. 735) TT: among spirits, reeds, and tangled thorn (Baker and Pasuk, 2012, p. 1,011)

There are many Thai words for different types of ghosts. The word ผี (phi) is a general word used to describe any type of ghost. In the fifth hemistich of TT 24, the words phi pong (ผีโป่ง) refer to a particular type of spirit that resides in the pong forest but the word ‘spirits’, a hyperonym is chosen, resulting in a generalising translation.