Predictors of Jealousy and Self-Esteem

‐ Jealousy was predicted equally well by 1) overall defenses, relationship duration and self-esteem, 2) mature defenses, immature defenses, relationship duration and self-esteem. When only defenses were included, jealousy was best predicted by acting out, humor, anticipation, somatization, reaction formation and autistic fantasy.

‐ Self-esteem was best predicted by projection, denial, jealousy, relationship duration and undoing. When only defenses were included, self-esteem was best predicted by projection, denial, autistic fantasy, and rationalization.

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4.9 Theoretical, Clinical and Practical Significance

4.9.1 Jealousy and Self-Esteem

Jealousy is an emotion that is felt by most people at some time during their lives, and has been shown not to differ in clinical and non-clinical samples.

Pathological jealousy, jealousy related to paranoid personality disorder, and jealousy related to violence, bring the emotion into a clinical setting. The current study, however, concerns jealousy in romantic relationships, and as such, the clinical significance of findings is relevant with regard to jealousy issues in individual psychotherapy and couples therapy. The advantages of “appropriate jealousy, constructively expressed” (Clanton, 1996; p. 188) must be kept in mind when interpreting results and planning therapeutic interventions.

Self-esteem has been linked with various psychological and social problems, and as such the clinical significance of this construct has been long-recognised in terms of the impact of research findings. Compensatory, or fragile self-esteem (review: Kernis & Paradise, 2002) appears as high self-esteem when measured by global self-esteem measures. In addition to keeping this in mind when interpreting relationships between high self-esteem and other variables, perhaps fragile self- esteem, rather than global self-esteem, would characterise jealousy more accurately, linked as it is to aggression. This could explain the discrepancy between the picture of somebody with classic low self-esteem and a jealous individual, and could be a direction for future research.

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The finding that there was a relationship between jealousy and low self-esteem supports the widely-held view that jealous individuals have low self-esteem. The relationship, however, was a moderate one, and inferences made from it should be treated with caution. The relationship between jealousy and self-esteem has clinical implications in that individuals experiencing jealousy in relationships are likely to have low self-esteem, and therapeutic interventions could therefore focus on improving self-esteem to address jealousy issues. When the sample was divided by gender, the relationship only existed for women and not for men. Women would therefore potentially benefit more from focusing on improving their self-esteem in therapy. Previous findings of a relationship between relationship-related self-esteem and jealousy (White & Mullen, 1989) also point to the benefits of focusing more specifically on perceived inadequacy as a partner, rather than global self-esteem.

4.9.2 Jealousy and Defenses

The relationship between jealousy and defenses had not been explored in previous research. Defenses have been conceptualised as protecting the self against unpleasant thoughts and emotions (A. Freud, 1936; Cramer, 2006). It seems

surprising, then, that the relationship between defenses and specific emotions has been neglected in research. Indeed, it would be interesting to know how the different negative emotions such as anxiety, guilt, jealousy and sadness relate to defenses. Additionally, measures of defenses for specific emotions would shed light on individual differences in defense use. For example, a measure for defense use in relation to jealousy may show that some individuals who feel particularly threatened

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by experiencing that emotion use particular kinds of defenses, and those who feel less threatened use other kinds of defenses.

The finding that jealous individuals were likely to use a high level of global defenses seems not to support Freud’s (1922) suggestion that lack of jealousy infers defensive processes such as repression. Repression was a defense under which Freud often subsumed all other defenses, and to support his suggestion, individuals with low levels of jealousy would have the highest global defenses scores. However, in its current conceptualisation alongside other defenses, repression is a defense by which thoughts and feelings are completely removed from consciousness, whereas other defenses may allow partial awareness to remain. Repression was not included in the DSQ because it is not measurable by self-report, and as a result we have no

information about how this individual defense and jealousy are related. Lack of differentiation between defense styles is likely to limit the usefulness of a global defense score, and indeed the relationship with jealousy was weak.

The overall defense score differentiates between defense factors, unlike the global defenses score. This allows for a measure of “overall maturity of defenses” and for simplified statistical comparisons. Higher overall maturity of defenses

corresponded with low jealousy, and the relationship was stronger for men.

The finding that people who are jealous are more likely to use immature defenses and less likely to use mature defenses has theoretical implications in that mature defenses seem to protect individuals from jealousy, whereas immature

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did not have a relationship with jealousy, when immature and neurotic defenses were combined, a positive relationship existed. Clinical implications of this relationship include the importance of recognising and interpreting immature defenses and neurotic defenses. By doing so, psychotherapists can treat not only those with neurotic disorders and personality disorders (Vaillant, 1992) but those with jealousy issues. Vaillant (1992) acknowledges mature defenses as adaptive and not needing a response from clinicians. Perhaps, however, mature defenses could be fostered in cognitive-behavioural approaches. For example, sublimation could be encouraged by increasing creative activities, and suppression, anticipation and humor could be encouraged through cognitive restructuring. Couples could be directed toward ways of interacting and activities that would challenge their typical defense patterns.

The finding that the relationship between jealousy and defense style was stronger for men has theoretical implications. Taken alongside the result that jealousy and self-esteem were not correlated for men, it seems that defenses, rather than self- esteem, have a larger impact on jealousy in men. Clinical implications of this might be that jealousy in women may be best addressed by focusing on self-esteem, whereas jealousy in men may be better addressed by focusing on defenses.

The finding of the current study that jealous individuals were likely to use projection is consistent with theory (e.g., Freud, 1922). However, it would seem that the lack of a negative relationship between denial and jealousy precludes the kind of relationship Freud (1922) wrote about with regard to repression and jealousy, in that lack of jealousy implies this defensive process. As discussed previously, however, an

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individual who uses denial may no longer be aware of jealous thoughts and feelings. In terms of theory, then, this result is difficult to interpret.

Jealous individuals were also likely to use passive aggression, acting out, devaluation, autistic fantasy, displacement, splitting, somatization and undoing. Passive aggression, devaluation, displacement and splitting seem to fit the picture of the way a jealous person might behave, and indeed correspond to some of the coping strategies described by Guerero and Affifi (1998). Autistic fantasy, somatization and undoing are perhaps more surprising in relation to jealousy. Sublimation, humor and suppression were related to low jealousy, and can be understood as protecting

individuals from jealous feelings. These findings add complexity to theory regarding the defenses involved in jealousy. It should be kept in mind, however, that these defenses were not measured specifically with regard to jealousy, so any theoretical elucidation should be tentative.

The finding that jealous men were twice as likely as jealous women to use projection, passive aggression, acting out and devaluation, and more likely to use autistic fantasy and somatization has implications in that although these defenses are used by jealous individuals generally, they may be particularly strong in jealous men. These defenses may therefore have a larger impact on jealousy in men, and therapists should therefore be especially aware of the potential operation of these mechanisms in men who present with jealousy issues. In couples therapy where jealousy is an issue, therapists would also do well to keep in mind that the use of defenses such as

projection and passive aggression may result in provocation of jealous and angry feelings in the individual’s partner. It is therefore important, through an understanding

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of defenses, to be aware of the origin of these feelings, and help jealous individuals, especially men, to take ownership of them. Men with low jealousy were also twice as likely to use humor as women, which can be seen as protective. It should be kept in mind that the stronger association between jealousy and particular defenses in men could be due to greater variability in women. That is, the gender difference could be a statistical artefact of restricted range in men.

Jealous women were found to use splitting, whereas jealous men were not. Jealous women may therefore be likely to view themselves and others as all good or all bad, and therapists could focus on assisting women to integrate positive and negative qualities. Jealous men were found to use displacement, whereas jealous women were not; redirection of emotion to the correct object may be helpful in the case of the use of this defense. Women with low jealousy were found to use

suppression, whereas men were not; this defense therefore may be particularly helpful in dealing with jealousy for women. Men with low jealousy were also found to use anticipation and reaction formation, whereas women were not; this defense therefore may be particularly helpful in dealing with jealousy for men. Again, the stronger association between jealousy and particular defenses in one gender could be a statistical artefact of greater variability in the other.

Comparisons of correlations between defenses and both jealousy and self- esteem show that particular defenses related only to high jealousy and not to self- esteem were those of acting out, devaluation and splitting. Individuals with high jealousy were therefore more likely to use these defenses regardless of their self- esteem. Individuals with low jealousy, on the other hand, were more likely to use

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sublimation regardless of their self-esteem. This has theoretical implications in that the associations between jealousy and particular defenses independent of self-esteem highlight the existence of a unique relationship between these variables.