rules you must follow for cultivating your successful wit

There are 11 rules to follow closely for successful wit. They guide you past the pitfalls of the amateur and enable you to de­

velop swiftly your psychic powered wit.

1. Don’t try to be witty in order simply to be a wit.

2. Don’t be witty at someone else’s expense, even if you are campaigning for office and view your opponent as contemptible.

3. Never laugh nor scoff when you are being witty. Be intensely serious, so that you look natural and as if not trying to be “funny.”

4. For the best reaction to your wit, direct it mainly against

yourself. That’s why the overweight and the under­

weight, the long nosed, the downtrodden and the vic­

timized make the best wits.

5. Never repeat your wit. If it fails the first time you say it, keep right on talking as if you had not said it.

6. English wit may be effective when confined to polysyl­

lables with a minimum amount of action, as in Dickens’

P ickw ick Papers. American wit, however, should be con­

fined to situations and commonplace words. Americans are less used to the subtlety of polysyllables and are prone to take them literally.

7. Mimic no one right in his presence, even if you are gifted with such a talent, unless you are teaching some­

one a skill and are seriously demonstrating his faults to him.

8. If you are a gifted wit, don’t overdo it nor try to be witty at every opportunity. You will fail frequently if you do.

9. Never use wit against the moral character of anyone in particular, regardless of how he may have fallen.

10. You wax wittiest when you are most serious in word and action and talk ill of no one.

11. Never poke fun about anybody’s name, nationality, reli­

gion, race or appearance.

Study thoroughly these 11 rules of wit and use them wisely.

The easy way to acquire total leadership over others invisibly with your psychic powered wit

N EV ER be negatively witty against a woman, no matter how degraded she might be. Not only is it unchivalrous, but it also draws against you the animosity of both sexes. And, of course, flash no wit against a partly or wholly handicapped person—

either against his poor sight, hearing, speech, limp or anything else which he obviously prefers not to be afflicted with. If you flash your wit against someone who is not blessed with good looks or popularity, too, don’t aim it at those lacks. It would be wiser to suggest instead that, secretly he is a devil with women. Let your wit, in other words, portray the person against whom you

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direct it as being what he would like to be and not expose him for what he actually is. Don’t poke fun at the individual of limited means and call him poor. Announce, instead, that he could probably buy everybody there ten times over. You might even add, “The truly rich don’t show off their wealth, you know.

Only paupers like me carry all they own on their backs.” Not only are you not humbling that individual then, but you are also ridiculing yourself. Never engage in bullying wit, such as that in which you call a less strong man weak, and mock him about it before others. Remark instead, “Joe’s arms might not look like Hercules’, but don’t you underrate his power. A bullet hits harder than a club.” Save his face, rather than make fun of him. Need­

less to state, never mimic a cross-eyed person, or one with a speech impediment.

Allow no vulgar expressions to creep into your wit, unless you are a man and are exchanging jokes privately with other men and the expression fits in naturally. Never let yourself feel that you are under obligation to be witty, just because it would enter­

tain. The great wits of literature, like Voltaire and George Bernard Shaw, wrote in dead earnest and were astounded when their literature was called the acme of wit. When you, yourself, are the object of another’s wit, do not resent nor defy it. Bravely accept your own turn at being the object of another’s wit when it comes and let others enjoy laughing at you for a change. If they laugh at your answers or reactions, it is because you entertain them and they will relish your company all the more. Don’t feel that be­

cause others laugh at you then, that you are disgraced. Let them, instead, see you as a good sport.

So, practice the Exercises as discussed herein and master producing the projection of your psychic powered wit. All names, of course, have been changed.

E xercise 1. How to discourage a flirting m arried woman in­

stantly without insulting her or getting info trouble with her in­

fluential husband, with your psychic p o w ered wit.

Sue is the flirting wife of Chester, She is very attractive; but she is also an incorrigible flirt, and her husband, Chester, is very jealous. On the other hand, he would not tolerate anyone insult­

ing Sue either. Chester can do much for you, but he can also help to hold you down. You don’t want to get on his bad side through the superficial behavior of his wife. You want to discourage Sue’s dangerous attentions from you instantly without insulting her or getting into trouble with Chester. You can do it with your psychic powered wit! Practice how to create it before your mirror, and then project it to her.

Stand across your room and stare at your image in the mirror. Transform that image of yourself into that of Sue. The next time you associate with Sue and she flashes her charms at you, fill yourself with a profound respect for her intelligence—

even if she has, or exhibits, little of it. Saturate yourself with that on e thought picture of her, and listen and react to her as if she were indeed the m ost intelligent person you know. W ith Multi­

plied Nerve Gap power (feel divinely blissful), project that one thought picture out of your eyes with shattering psychic power, and nail it right into Sue through her eyes. It will leap across her own Nerve Gaps to the psychic power center in her forehead, faster and stronger than any other competing impression she re­

ceives at the time . . . competing impressions like, whether you are truly sincere in treating her as if she were that intelligent, or whether you don’t care for her type and she is a woman scorned.

Sue will feel deeply flattered to realize that she is considered so unusually intelligent. Chester, her husband, will feel flattered and relieved, too. In order not to lower herself in your estimation, Sue will automatically change her flirting manner with you and try to impress you still more with her fancied intelligence. With your psychic powered wit and without insulting her, you will have discouraged Sue instantly from flirting with you and getting you into trouble with Chester, and will have acquired total leadership over her.

E xercise 2 . How to confuse and overwhelm a firesome person , insfanily, in a heated argum ent, with your psychic p o w ere d wit.

Al is rather tiresome to you because he tries to embarrass you repeatedly by picking arguments with you. He also does so with others. You don’t want to quarrel with him, but neither do you care to waste time engaging in unproductive strife. Your solu­

1 4 8 YOUR PSYCHIC POWERED W IT

tion is to confuse and overwhelm him in the heated argument.

Do it with your psychic powered wit. Practice how to create it before your mirror, and then project it to him.

Sit across your room and stare at your image in the mirror.

Transform that image of yourself into that of Al. Imagine the two of you in the midst of another heated argument. Fill yourself suddenly with a feeling of the greatest calm and pleasure. Listen to everything Al says, with keen delight, no matter how scathing or insulting it may be to you, and answer it in total agreement with him. Saturate yourself with that thought picture. With Multi­

plied Nerve Gap power (feel divinely blissful), project that thought picture out of your eyes with shattering psychic power and nail it right into Al, through his eyes. It will leap across his Nerve Gaps t the psychic power center in his forehead, faster and stronger than any other competing impression he receives at the time . . . competing impressions, like the exact words of the next sentence which he is preparing to fire at you, and his con­

viction that he has crushed and embarrassed you this time in the argument. He will gape at you in confusion, entirely at a loss as to what to say next. He will be crushed with embarrassment when he realizes that you are not the least bit discomfited by his verbal attacks. W ith your psychic powered wit you will have confused and overwhelmed instantly a tiresome pest in a heated argument and acquired total leadership over him.

E xercise 3 . How to bring a d espairin gly stubborn husband or w ife under your e a sy control instantly, with your psychic p o w ­ e re d wit.

Lena is your fiancee or your wife. You worship the ground she walks on, but she drives you to despair with her unyielding stubbornness over so many things, large and small. Your relation­

ship, as a result, frequently degenerates into one argument after another. You feel that it cannot continue that way indefinitely without leading to one big, final break up. And yet, Lena suits you in practically every way, except for her despairing stubborn­

ness. You will just have to bring her under easy control and stop her from trying to resist you at every step. Do it with your psychic powered wit. Practice how to create it before your mirror, and then project it to her.

Stand or sit across your room and stare at your image in the mirror. Transform that image of yourself into that of Lena. The next time you talk to her and she proves stubborn, fill yourself with an attitude of intense delight. Act as if you are enjoying tremendously talking to her, and as if everything she says to you is most entertaining. Even touch noses or do anything that sug­

gests that you are not taking her seriously, although you delight in listening to her talk. If she becomes nettled, chuckle and con­

tinue in the same vein. Saturate yourself with that thought p ic­

ture, With Multiplied Nerve Gap power (feel divinely blissful), project that thought picture out of your eyes with shattering psychic power and nail it right into Lena, through her eyes. It will leap across her own Nerve Gaps to the psychic power center in her forehead, faster and stronger than any other competing impression she receives at the time . . . competing impressions, like determination to continue resisting your demands or ideas, or her conviction that you will give in to her. Despite herself, Lena will start enjoying your new attitude towards her and will compromise with you without even realizing it. W ith your psychic powered wit you will have brought a despairingly stubborn mate (or friend) under your easy control instantly and acquired total leadership over her.

Now that you have practiced these exercises, apply the same technique in any situation in life in which you can use your wit to acquire total leadership over others instantly. In the true life cases described, you will learn how certain people in different places have used most effectively the magic secret of the psychic powered wit. The names of the individuals involved have been changed.

How Lee instantly stopped his otherwise properly behaving wife from repeatedly embarrassing him at social gatherings with the men present, with his psychic powered wit.

Lee was happily married to Josephine. He loved her deeply, and she loved him, too. But, there was a serious threat to the peace of their marriage. It was Josephine’s sudden, unexplainable change of personality from that of a dutiful but sometimes morose housewife to that of a boisterous, over-aggressive, intimate act­

ing female with the men at every party they attended, or every

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group they joined. Actually, she did nothing immoral then or afterwards, but she put on such an embarrassing over-display of her charms that she gave the very opposite impression. It an­

tagonized the other women present, as well as raised sky high the wrong hopes of the men on whom she bestowed them.

As Lee watched her helplessly from the sidelines, he wished that the floor would cave in and swallow him whole. After every party they attended together, he flew at her at home, and she replied in kind. Either she relished exhibiting herself in that unbecoming fashion, Lee concluded, or she yearned to shine in the center of attraction of men. Meanwhile, she hardly noticed the other women there and that inflamed them still more, as well as heightened their suspicions about her. Josephine’s outlandish be­

havior had to be repressed immediately, Lee realized, for it was holding him back both socially and in his career. He hated to think what his business associates thought of him after witness­

ing such a scene. He was certainly not rising as fast in the firm as other employees who were there no longer than he, but whose wives behaved approvingly at the get-togethers. Lee was in a frenzy over what to do, being divided between his adoration for his wife and his social life and career.

A close friend in the office who was a client of mine told him to try his psychic powered wit. Lee listened to him carefully.

He practiced the magic secret in the privacy of his room and was ready for Josephine.

At the next party, just as he had expected, Josephine fell into her act again as soon as she found herself in the vicinity of several men. She fluttered among them like a butterfly in a garden of fragrant roses, first to one man, then to another. All the while her eyes and her hands danced like those of the wildest flirt, and her laughs were so loud and sexy sounding that they attracted every eye. With a cheerful smile, Lee moved up to the group of men and said, with a twinkle in his eye, “My wife once took ballet lessons. But she has forgotten they are over.” Taking her by the arm, he added to her, “Shall we have some refresh­

ment, dear?”

Josephine was thrown into confusion. With his eyes glued on hers, Lee filled himself with a feeling of understanding her thoroughly and of considering her as an overgrown child. He

saturated himself with that one thought picture. With Multiplied Nerve Gap power (feel divinely blissful), he projected that one thought picture out of his eyes with shattering psychic power, and nailed it right into her through her eyes,

Josephine tried to resist him and return to her circle of male admirers, but Lee chuckled and peered at her in a deeply under­

standing manner, as if amused by her attempted display of her charms again. Josephine looked at him again, this time more studiously. Lee chuckled again, and again projected his one thought picture into her with Multiplied Nerve Gap power (feel divinely blissful).

Josephine seemed absolutely at a loss as to what to do. Lee’s on e thought picture had leaped across her own Nerve Gaps to the psychic power center in her forehead, faster and stronger than any other competing impression she had received at the time . . . competing impressions, like her great urge to “let herself go”

when in the company of admiring men and to enchant them all with what she considered the most fascinating behavior of an alluring woman.

She recovered shortly after the refreshments and found an­

other group of men and tried the same thing. Lee approached her again as soon as she threw herself into the obnoxious stride of her party behavior, and as the eyes of her surprised admirers were brightening disrespectfully. With a cheerful smile he said again, upon invading the group, “My wife, I see, still thinks she is taking a screen test. Come on, sweetheart! You are indeed very beautiful and an accomplished actress. But people are waiting to meet you. Come now, dear.”

When Josephine turned spitefully on him, Lee still met her with his cheerful smile and again projected to her the one thought picture of himself being filled with a feeling of understanding her thoroughly and of considering her as an overgrown child.

Josephine opened her mouth to snap back something at him, but Lee again projected his one thought picture into her and led her away.

At subsequent parties, Josephine was increasingly careful be­

cause she feared that Lee would step in at any time and halt her exhibitionism. She accepted her more normal place in the gather­

ing reluctantly and did not seem too happy about it. But, she was

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no longer putting on the old display of herself and embarrassing Lee no end. Lee knew that he could not alter her basic per­

sonality, but he had put her disgusting social traits under re­

straint. W ith his psychic powered wit he had stopped his other­

wise properly behaving wife from embarrassing him repeatedly at social gatherings with men present, and he had acquired total leadership over her.

How Nick brought an unmanageable youngster instantly under his control, with his psychic powered wit.

Nick was a high school industrial arts teacher. Juveniles were difficult to control in most schools, but Joe was an exceptionally difficult teen-ager. Indeed, he seemed to enjoy being a problem, as if he thought that his classmates enjoyed it or admired him for his antics. Joe’s conduct, too, encouraged others in the class to imitate him and threatened to convert Nick’s class into a laugh riot which would result in Nick being called in by the principal to explain his lack of discipline over his pupils. Since Nick could not discipline Joe as he would have liked to (indeed, another teacher who slapped such a boy was dismissed), he was in a serious predicament. Because of Joe, he was faced with a dilemma.

Nick aspired to become principal, too, some day. W ith a record

Nick aspired to become principal, too, some day. W ith a record