What's this?' I said when he handed me a stack of letters. Each letter had a thick set of files attached to it

'Your application to the University Grants Commission, or the UGC,

to open a college. The files contain details about the proposed college'

I went through the files. It had sections such as course descriptions, facilities offered and faculty hiring plan.

Tt is standard stuff, taken from earlier applications,' Bedi said.

I signed the letters. 'So, they send an approval or what?* I said.

'They will send a date for inspection of the site. Once they inspect, they will give you an in-principle approval to start construction,'

T imagine we have to pay somebody to clear the inspection?' I said.

144 • CHETAN BHAGAT

Bed! laughe|L 'You learn fast. Of course, we pay, A thick packet to every inspector. However, right now we pay to obtain an inspection date.

First things first.'

My eyebrows went up. 'Joking, right?' I said.

'Mo, any government work, especially in education, requires a fee.

Get used to it,' He then listed out the palms we had to grease in order to open a place to teach kids in our country, Apart from the UGC» we had to apply to ATCTE, or the All India Council for Technical Education.

They clear the engineering colleges. Also, every private college requires a government university affiliation. For that, we had to get approvals from the vice-chancellor of a state university. Shukla-ji's connections and a generous envelope would do the trick.

'Otherwise the vice-chancellor can create a lot of hassle,' Bedi said, speaking from past experience,

'So, who are these UGC and AICTE inspectors, anyway?' I said, 'University lecturers from government colleges are appointed as inspectors, Of course, since it is such a lucrative job, the lecturers have to bribe to become one,' Bedi said.

'Whom?'

'Senior management at UGC* or someone in the education ministry.

Anyway, that is their business. We have to focus on ours. Please inform Shukla-ji we will need funds for all this.'

I-Mddid-'Don't forget the VNN meeting,' Bedi said. And definitely don't forget the bag,'

1 can't wait to get rid of it,' I said. Tt is scary to keep so much cash in the house.'

'Don't worry,' Bedi said, 'One VNN visit and it will all be gone.7

We reached the Varanasi Nagar Nigam office, opposite Shaheed Udyaan, at six in the evening. The official had told us to come after working hours.

If you are willing to pay, government offices can do more overtime than MNCs.

REVOLUTION 2 0 2 0 • 1 3 9

'Welcome, welcome, I am Sinha,' a man greeted us in the empty reception area. He led us upstairs. We climbed tip two floors of the dilapidated building, Sinha, deputy-corporator, had known Shukla-ji for over a decade and referred to him as his brother.

I f my big brother wants it, consider it done,' Sinha said. He didn't mention that big brother would need to give little brother a gift,

1 took out the maps, property documents and our formal application, Sinha pored over them with a sonorous %mmni

'We cm only start when we have the land re-zoned,' I said.

'Re-zoning is tough," Sinha said, 'Higher-ups have to approve*

'How long will it take?' I said, 'You look young,' Sinha said.

'Excuse me?' I said.

'Impatience, the first folly of youth. You are opening a college, what is the hurry?'

'It's still going to take years. But I want to get all the approvals done,' IsaM,

Bedi signalled me to be quiet. Sinha laughed,

'Don't you have to get the building plan approval too?* the deputy-corporator said,

'Yes,* Bedi said. 'Can your junior officers handle that?'

'Send the documents to me, send everything home. Everything'* Sinha said, stressing the last word.

I got the drift, I patted the plastic bag I had kept on the floor.

'I have brought something here,' I said,

In the office?' Sinha stood up hurriedly 'Are you crazy?'

I had brought the money to show how serious we were about getting the job done. Obviously, I didn't expect him to take cash over the counter

'Bedi sir, teach him how it is done. He will be a disaster,' Sinha said, as he led us out of the office,

I hugged the heavy, red plastic bag closer.

'How much, by the way?' Sinha enquired as we came outside,

I said*

1 4 0 • CHETAN BHAGAT

'Not for re-zoning and building plan,' Sinha said.

It's a college, please be reasonable,' I said,

'1 am being reasonable, But ten is too less. Fifteen,5 Sinha said 'No concession for Shukla-ji?' I said.

"This is already half of what I take,' Sinha said

'Eleven?' I said. I was bargaining with him as if 1 was buying a TVshirt, O f course, the thought of the amount involved numbed me.

'Twelve and a half. Done! Do not embarrass me before my big brother,' Sinha said.

I didn't argue further. I had to make arrangements for the remaining

'You are a good bargainer,' Bedi said to me while dropping me off at Shukla-ji's residence,

'You smash it,' said Shukla-ji, handing me a coconut at the entrance of the college site. A crowd of his sycophants surrounded us.

The bhoomipufan ceremony marked the beginning of construction.

I had run around for three months to obtain the two dozen approvals to make this day possible. The UGC and AICTE in-principle approvals had finally arrived. The final inspections would be conducted when the college was ready to open. For now, we had permission to begin construction

The only other thing we needed were god's blessings, Fortunately, that didn't require a bundle of cash,

1 held the coconut in my hand and looked around, Aarti hadn't

'Do it, son,' Shukla-ji said.

I couldn't wait for her any longer. I guess the day did not mean as much to her as it did to me,

I smashed the fruit, imagining it to be Raghav's head. As it cracked, a sliver of the shell cut my finger. People clapped around me. I took the cut finger to my mouth and sucked the bruise.

'GangaTech Engineering College' - two labourers fixed a metal hoarding in the muddy ground. I should have felt more emotion. After all,

REVOLUTION 2 0 2 0 • 1 4 1

I had slogged for months. However, I felt nothing. Maybe because 1 knew the exact amount of bribes it took to reach this day Seventy-two lakhs, twenty-three thousand and four hundred rupees to obtain everything from electricity connections to construction site labour approvals.

Shukla-ji had invited over a hundred guests, including members of the press, We had a caterer who served hot samosas and jalebis in little white boxes.

Shukla-ji addressed everyone from a makeshift dais.

Three more years, and this dream will be a reality This is a gift to my city, which deserves the best he said.

I sat in the front row, I kept turning around to see if Aarti had arrived.

After Shukla-ji § speech the press asked questions. Most were simple, relating to the courses that would be on offer and the upcoming college facilities. However, a few tough journalists did not spare him.

'Shukla sir, are you the owner of this college? How much is your stake?* one reporter asked.

T am a trustee, I have no stake. It is a non-profit entity,' Shukla-ji m i

'Who is handing the land and construction?*

"Mr Gopal Mishra here owns this land. I want to encourage young talent so I helped him raise some funds,* Shukla-ji said and wiped his forehead with a handkerchief,

'Funds from where?' the reporter continued.

'From various benefactors. Don't worry, somebody has given money not taken it. Media is so suspicious these days,* Shukla-ji said.

'Sir, what is happening in the Ganga Action Plan scam? You are named in that,* a reporter from the last row asked.

It is an old and dead story. There is no scam. We spent the money to clean the river,* Shukla-ji said.

This new topic galvanised ail the reporters. Everyone raised their hand as they scrambled to ask questions.

'No more questions, thank you very much,' Shukla-ji said.

The reporters ran behind him as he left the site, I stayed back, ensuring that the guests were served the refreshments,

1 4 2 • CHETAN BHAGAT

A truck arrived with bricks, iron rods and other construction materials. Behind it, I saw a white Ambassador car with a red light on top.

Aarti got out of the car upon spotting me, T am so so so sorry she said'Are the prayers over?*

'Can the prayers ever be over without Aarti?' I said.

Varanasi