feelings, listen to children share what happened, ask for ideas or
solutions, and follow through.
WHY IS THE INDICATOR FOR THIS STANDARD IMPORTANT?
Learning to responsibly and peacefully solve conflicts, while getting one’s needs met, is difficult for all people. Helping young children resolve conflicts is teaching a life skill that will be utilized in every relationship, of any kind, throughout their lifetimes.
REQUIRED EVIDENCE
In addition to this evidence, the evidence for all 13 indicators in Standard 11a must be met.
Interview: What types of conflict resolution or problem solving approaches do you use? How is the approach modified for non verbal children?
ASK YOURSELF
When conflicts between children arise, am I only stopping the conflict or am I taking the opportunity to teach the children how to manage future conflicts as well?
Once they practice the skills I teach them, can I trust the children to begin to resolve their own conflicts?
Am I listening to all the children in a conflict?
Do I acknowledge the feelings of all children in a conflict (e.g., the victims and the aggressor)?
GETTING STARTED
Decide on the steps to follow that help children learn to resolve conflicts.
FOLLOW UP STEPS
When conflicts arise, notice whether you are following the steps you have established.
When conflicts are not occurring, review with the children how they can help solve their own problems.
When no challenges are present, review the limits with the children as well as positive decisions that could be made in varied scenarios.
IDEAS TO HELP YOU MEET THIS STANDARD
The Center for Evidenced Practice: Young Children with Challenging Behavior,
www.challengingbehavior.org , has numerous resources to help you with ideas to implement to create a classroom environment that supports positive behavior. Available on the website are also six professional development modules which help support your effort to work with young children and deal with disruptive and destructive behavior.
What does it look like?
Kali and Brianna want the same toy. There is only one. They are tugging at the toy and raising their voices. The teacher approaches and acknowledges the feelings of both girls by saying, “You both look angry!” She then asks for the children to state the problem. After listening closely, she says, “You both want the toy but there is only one.” She further asks, “What can we do to help BOTH of you feel like you can have fun playing?” [Example answers might include: “I had it first. Give it to me.”; “We could share.”; “We could take turns.”] The caregiver helps the children evaluate those responses, “Having the toy first sounds like one way to decide who will START playing with the toy, but how can we decide when Kali gets a turn?” Once both children agree on a solution, the teacher allows the two children to try their choice. Later, the teacher returns to the children and says, “Look! Your idea is working! You are really learning how to solve problems!”
Contact your local Child Care Resource and Referral Agency to learn more about a Social Emotional Training in your area.
Contact your local Child Care Resource and Referral Agency and ask to speak to the Inclusion Specialist.
GOING FURTHER TO BEST PRACTICE
Use non-punitive discipline methods effectively, giving attention for positive behaviors and redirecting child from unacceptable to acceptable activity.
Actively involve children in solving their conflicts and problems, help children talk out problems and think of solutions, and help them to understand the feelings of others.
Respond sympathetically to help children who are upset, hurt, or angry. Recognize signs of stress in children’s behavior and responds with appropriate stress-reducing activities.
Limits and consequences should exist. Thinking through what the limits are and the consequences will help to create consistent interaction when destructive or disruptive behavior occurs.
Limits should be meaningful to children. They should be stated in a positive way and be few in number and applicable throughout the day. Some limits might include: follow directions; keep hands and feet to ourselves; and use inside voices.
Alternative consequences to yelling, include explaining the effect of the behavior and stating the desired behavior. Consequences can include those natural outcomes as a result of being disruptive and the provision of a choice that is appropriate.
Techniques to use to encourage children to follow the limits include positive reinforcement and consistent supervision and awareness of the children’s activities.
Include social/emotional topics in weekly lesson plans, such as activities like book making about feelings or activities designed to promote sharing