Easily Confused Words
21. supposed, whether, weather 22 expect, accept, except
23. expect 24. advise, advice 25. affected 26. affect 27. effect 28. capitol, capital 29. personal, personnel 30. principal 31. principles
A
word is a terrible thing to waste. Or is it better to say, “It is a terrible thing to waste a word”? The difference between these two versions is a matter of diction, using appropriate words and combin- ing them in the right way to communicate your message accurately. This lesson discusses ways to avoid some of the most common diction traps: wordiness, lack of precison, clichés, and jargon. Learning to rec- ognize and avoid such writing weaknesses will turn a mediocre writer into a good one—this means expressing ideas in the best and clearest possible way.L E S S O N
Diction
L E S S O N S U M M A R Y
“Diction?” you might think. “In a book about writing?” While diction refers to how words are pronounced, it also refers to which words you choose. To use language effectively, writers have to write concisely and precisely. This lesson and Lesson 19 focus on how to choose the words that best communicate what you want to say.
Wo r d i n e s s
Excess words in communication waste space and time. Not only that, but they may also distort the message or make it difficult for the reader to understand. Get in the habit of streamlining your writing, making the sentences as con- cise as possible. If you use five words where three would do, delete the extra words or structure your sentences to avoid them. See if you can rewrite the sentences in the first column to make them less wordy. Check yourself against the version in the second column.
The additional words in the first column add no information. All they do is take up space.
WORDY REVISED
It was a three-hour period after the accident The rescue squad arrived three hours after the when the rescue squad that we knew was going accident. [9 words]
to help us arrived. [21 words]
It was decided that the church would organize The church organized a committee to search for a committee for the purpose of conducting a a new pastor. [11 words]
search for a new pastor. [21 words]
Buzzwords and Fluffy Modifiers
Buzzwords—such as aspect, element, factor, scope, situation, type, kind, forms, and so on—sound important, but add no meaning to a sentence. They often signal a writer who has little or nothing to say, yet wishes to sound impor- tant. Likewise, modifiers such as absolutely, definitely, really, very, important, significant, current, major, and quite may add length to a sentence, but they seldom add meaning.
Wordy:
The nature of the scheduling system is a very important matter that can definitely have a really significant impact on the morale aspect of an employee’s attitude. Aspects of our current scheduling policy make it absolutely necessary that we undergo a significant change.
Revised:
The scheduling system can affect employee morale. Our policy needs to be changed. The following table lists a host of phrases that can be reduced to one or two words.
WORDY CONCISE WORDY CONCISE
puzzling in nature puzzling at this point in time now; today
Passive Voice
Some wordiness is caused by using passive voice verbs when you could use the active voice. (See Lesson 11 if you don’t remember passive voice.)
PASSIVE ACTIVE
It has been decided that your application for grant The committee denied your grant because it did money is not in accordance with the constraints out- not follow the application guidelines.
lined by the committee in the application guidelines.
The letter of resignation was accepted by the The Board of Directors accepted the
Board of Directors. resignation.
Intellectual-ese
Those passive sentences suffer not only from passive voice wordiness, but also from the writer’s attempt to make the writing sound intellectual, to make the message more difficult than necessary. Writers make this error in many ways. One way is to turn adjectives and verbs into nouns. This transformation usually means extra words are added to sentence.
WORDY REVISED
Water pollution [noun] is not as serious in the Water is not as polluted [adjective] in northern
northern parts of Canada. Canada.
Customer demand [noun] is reducing in the area Customers demand [verb] fewer sales services. of sales services.
– D I C T I O N–
Another way writers add words without adding meaning is to use a pretentious tone. What follows is an actual memo issued by a bureaucrat during World War II. When it was sent to President Franklin Roosevelt for his approval, he edited the memo before sending it on.
Original pretentious memo:
In the unlikely event of an attack by an invader of a foreign nature, such preparations shall be made as will completely obscure all Federal buildings and non-Federal buildings occupied by the Fed- eral government during an air raid for any period of time from visibility by reason of internal or external illumination.
Roosevelt’s revised memo:
If there is an air raid, put something across the windows and turn off the lights outside in build- ings where we have to keep the work going.
Here’s another example of pretentious writing, along with a clearer, revised version.
Pompous memo:
As per the most recent directive issued from this office, it is incumbent upon all employees and they are henceforth instructed to reduce in amount the paper used in the accomplishment of their daily tasks due to the marked increase in the cost of such supplies.
Revised:
Since paper costs have increased, employees must use less paper.