VIGNETTE 14 – THEIR ACHIEVEMENT OR MINE? 1 Context

In June 2013 a colleague accompanied me to TL to assist with assessment of the students’ projects. My plan was to spend two days listening to student presentations, one day with the students for data collection for my PhD and two days visiting students in their workplaces to gain extra evidence of their work practices if I felt I had not yet received enough evidence to declare them competent at AQF Level 8. We arrived in Dili on a Sunday evening. Returning to TL I was drenched with anticipation. I would be re-united with my students – these people who had invaded my life and developed in me a new sense of what it means to be different. Some of them would be travelling great distances to attend the presentations of their achievements over the last twelve months. I knew from their project reports some would be proud and well

prepared, others scrambling to put together their PowerPoint presentations in a professional manner and perhaps regretting leaving this until the last minute. All had promised to attend for the three planned days of presentations and interviews for my research but I wondered what last minute compelling work requirements or family events might prevent them from coming and I felt nervous about this. I believed the success of the scholarship program hinged on all

students achieving the qualification. Some students had stayed in constant contact with me; some had remained mostly silent until I reminded them I was arriving for their presentations in eight weeks. Even then I didn’t receive immediate communicative responses from them. Instead there was more silence until completed reports were emailed three, two or even one week before I was due to arrive.

On the Monday morning we were collected from our hotel by a student and driven to DIT to commence student presentations. We passed students in neat uniform, raggedly walking along the side of the roads in groups, carrying books, headed towards the local school. The houses we passed were simple huts with dirt-covered grounds manicured with palm tree fronds. This contrasted significantly with the whitewashed orderly buildings emerging through the trees as we rounded the corner and pulled into the long driveway of DIT. Wide steps led up to the front entrance and as we parked the car and approached the entrance, familiar smiling faces appeared to greet us. My response was immediate and enthusiastic. I greeted them like long lost children and the shyness in their responses reminded me once again of the cultural

differences which I must respect. As I threw my arms around the first neck and hugged tightly to let them know I had missed them and they had been in my thoughts, I became aware of the curious glances from unknown faces in surrounding groups of students and pulled myself out of the embrace as quickly as I had thrown myself into it. The few of my students who were there on the steps to greet me were smiling broadly and seemed to recognise a trait in me that they found enjoyable. I did not detect any offence but rather an indulgent amusement at my

exuberance. We were led to a room where the presentations would take place. We were being honoured with the use of the Boardroom, furnished with a large solid wood oval table in old

European style (Portuguese) and twenty large comfortable office chairs on wheels. The walls of the room were white and the four double windows were closed and covered in sky blue curtains which remained permanently drawn against the oppressive heat. At the head of the table pushed against the wall stood two flags hanging in folds from their brass poles. One had the colours of Timor Leste, black, yellow and red, the colours of indigenous peoples, and the other a DIT flag in blue and white. A screen had been pulled down from the ceiling at the front of the room and a projector attached to a laptop computer was connected to a power source on the wall behind. At the back of the room on a podium stood a statue of the Virgin Mary with artificial flowers in a vase. Two wall-mounted cooling units ineffectually buzzed in the background.

5.15.2 Anecdote

Her hands fumble as she inserts the usb into the laptop connected to the overhead projector. Her PowerPoint presentation glows from the white screen in the overly hot, darkened boardroom. Her lowered voice and hesitant English ensures she has the absolute attention of her audience. Her presentation is detailed and complex. Her explanation gains confidence with each passing slide. Her project is well executed and evaluated. Her audience applauds with enthusiasm. As we take a break before the next presentation commences, several of the older students approach me to declare their delight at the student’s presentation. They do not believe a year ago she would have been capable of such a complex report so confidently delivered.

“She was so shy when she began this course”.

“She has never before produced a report like this”.

They marvel at her progress. I recognise in them not only their pride for her but pride for themselves. This achievement makes them feel proud of their collective

accomplishment. I am bursting with joy. I want them to tell me more about how they feel. This is my reward for my work with them. They drift away to take a break. They have said enough. My reward must come from within myself. I did the best I could whilst feeling my way blindly through the cultural landscape of their minds, their lack of

underpinning knowledge, their difficulty in studying in English and their emotional trauma in leaving behind family and friends. I feel vindicated in my belief that these students could reach AQF Level 8 within the twelve month period of the GCVET. I check my pride. It is not my achievement. It is theirs.

5.15.3 Emotional response and reflexivity

There were many presentations worthy of comment, but the fact that other students wanted me to understand their amazement that this student had developed the ability and the confidence to make her presentation is significant. It was a dawning for all of us of the consequence of the learning that had been achieved over the previous twelve months. I now realise I wasn’t alone in believing we had achieved much. Rather than individual students taking pride in their own

achievements, what happened in this incident was a collective understanding of what it meant for them as a group.

5.15.4 Strategies developed

Their recognition of each other’s ability to work hard and produce results gave them confidence in each other. They were colleagues working together to strengthen and develop a system they were all members of. They were recognising the development of individuals within the system; cogs within the wheel. Perhaps collectively they could build a better TVET system in TL. They experienced a sense of coming together, of understanding.

Peter Senge, founding Chair of the Society for Organisational Learning, says people in learning organisations are:

concerned with a shift of mind from seeing parts to seeing wholes, from seeing people as helpless reactors to seeing them as active participants in shaping their reality, from reacting to the present to creating the future. (Senge, 1990, p. 69)

5.15.5 Conclusive comments on layers

I felt this was what I was witnessing this day in these students - a realisation that they were not acting alone, that their colleagues had worked on substantial projects for their assessment and they had achieved a high standard in their work. I felt it was a dawning realisation and I was joyous. What had sometimes seemed to me impossible had been achieved.

5.16

VIGNETTE 15 – OUR FINAL NIGHT IN TL. I MAY NEVER SEE THESE