What are you doing, who are you with, how do you feel. Be very detailed. Then assume this identity. It might be forced at first, but in a month you will feel like this person, because you are! You may not have the girl yet, but she’s coming!
f) Lifestyle changes over monumental movements
This last step is key to sticking to your new habits and staying on course.
Saying to yourself, okay tomorrow I will never watch porn again is not the best approach to this.
It’s like how people say, “okay for the new year I’m going to lose 50lbs!” Then they don’t.
It’s because there is no context to this goal. In 3 weeks your goal will still be to lose 50lbs, and by this point you’ll be fed up.
Have a big goal, yes. And by all means (Exercise 2) write it down, sign it and put it on your wall. But then only focus on what you can do today and the lifestyle changes you can make to have your goal become automatic.
So instead of losing 50lbs, your goal should be to not eat sugar today. And to go for a run tomorrow morning. If you can make these habits stick, the 50lbs will lose itself.
So for porn, your goal shouldn't be to never watch porn again. It’s
intimidating. Just set goals to block your porn and get out more (lifestyle changes). And just aim to not watch porn this week. Then next week,
decide if you want to keep going. Then for other habits say, “okay I’m going to have more sex with my wife this week”, “or meditate every morning this week for 5 minutes.” 52 of these small wins and lifestyle changes, and you’re been porn free for a year and a completely different person.
Remember, it’s the micro-decisions that shape who you are.
Every time you are faced with a choice throughout the day it is a
crossroads that will effect you forever. No matter how small. Choosing to eat that Twinkie, or watch porn may seem small now. But multiply that small decision X 365. It’s huge.
4) Automation
They key to success is to make your new habits automated. To make them subconscious. Then you will no longer gravitate towards porn, but you will make healthy choices and be a growing man naturally.
Not only is all this the key to not watching porn, but it’s the key to success.
So how do you automate it?
Just small daily wins over and over and over. Just you vs. the day and winning that battle to not watch porn each day. And strapping up for battle tomorrow. Then choosing to follow your healthy habits by starting extremely small and building up over time. In 1 year, you will be a new man.
Trust me, I thought I would never get over porn. But now I rarely think about it. When I do, I get urges. But it’s not a challenge to do something else, because my brain is reprogrammed and rewired to do so.
5) Good habits to adopt
I’m not going to leave you hanging. Part of quitting porn is moving on to live an epic life. As you now know, success is 100% based on your habits. I have talked about this a lot already but in short, successful people get where they are because of the micro decisions (habits) they make daily, over and over. These small decisions seem like nothing in the moment, but they are everything. Unsuccessful people do the same thing. But their micro decisions are to watch TV, not go to the gym, eat fast food, etc.
I’ve talked a lot about you not only quitting porn, but replacing porn with habits that will make you ooze success.
What are these habits? Here are a few.
- Meditation
- Healthy Eating
- Cold Showers
- Waking up early with a morning routine
- Hydrating
- Approaching Women
- Self Educating (reading, podcasts etc.)
Just to name a few..
These are some amazing core habits. If you could do one of these every time you got a craving, and solidify that as a habit, how life changing would that be?
And the best part is, these are base starter habits.
Meaning that If you can apply them all, other smaller habits run off of them and happen naturally. They are the ultimate foundation. Two of them are in Richard Branson's and Tony Robbins top 3 things to do daily for success (exercise and self educate).
I want you to have these all as automated habits so that you don’t have to think about.
these habits into your life. It’s video based and interactive online. It’s not open right now so email me at [email protected] if you’re interested.
Step 7 recap:
To recap step 7, just remember - the key to quitting porn for good is to recognize your triggers (most likely stress and boredom). Then become consciously aware of when those triggers are occuring. And then choose and program good habits to adopt during those triggers.
It’s all about having that game plan.
Choose what habits you would like to replace with porn NOW. Be ready to use them. Then when you feel that craving, and recognize that trigger, do that positive habit instead.