The Daily Scoop
2017
The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the
truth
People might be
ALIVE
hours before they
DIE
Throughout the presence of humanity, there are certain topics that have been thought to be unequivocally and fully covered by us. But as a team of thirty of the country’s most highly-qualified scientists proved this very weekend, this is not the case. We at The Daily Scoop can reveal a series of facts today, discovered by head of this particular research Doctor Ben Acker, that will change the way people view the world from now on - that people might be alive hours before they die.
“Conscious, breathing and fully alive”
It all started when Dr. Acker made a shocking disclosure regarding princess Diana. “I found never before seen footage of Diana shot on the same day as her tragic death. She appears in several videos - conscious, breathing and fully alive. It was distressing.” he said in an exclusive interview to one of England’s finest newspapers (us). Little did he know that this was just the beginning of his legacy.
possible life before death. ‘‘The investigation that we carried out was very comprehensive.’’, he said. ‘‘The process hasn’t been easy at all. Many people were against us throughout.’’ But if you thought that critics of Dr. Acker and his team were simply people with differing opinions, you might want to brace yourself for the following story of what happened to them a couple of years ago.
‘‘She hated her dead grandfather’’
‘‘A woman came in shouting to us in our office while we were in a meeting to discuss our latest discoveries. She said (read: screamed) that she hated her dead grandfather, and she didn’t want to know if he had lived or not. She was only interested in him being, and staying, dead. We comforted her and assured her that we wouldn’t bring him back, and with that said she wished us good luck and left at peace.’’.
We at The Daily Ramble were privileged with a tour of the laboratory where the revolutionary research has been conducted. Under the streets of London we were guided through a massive set up of different appliances, wires and hoses. Acker’s team explained how they every day come in to take new tests and compare statistics. “In the evening we’re all exhausted, but the thought of making history is too tantalizing not to leave work until 23.00”.
‘‘Leave me alone!’’
When we had finished touring the fascinating facility of Acker’s stellar team, we asked a young man who was waiting for the subway what he thought of this appalling study. ‘‘This changes everything’’, he said, as he anxiously stared at the platform. ‘‘My mother despised my guts while still alive. To hear that her life of hating me might have been longer than I thought is truly gruesome.’’.
The young lad appeared to be a bundle of nerves, as he continued to mumble a bunch of incoherent words. When we asked him if his mother had ever been nice to him, he burst out in tears and cried out ‘‘Leave me alone!’’ as he ran towards the staircase and fled. We phoned him later to see if he had something to add to our scoop, but by the cracks of his voice in his haunting scream we interpret that he has nothing more to say.
Bridge Sets 60 Mph Limit For Pedestrians
Bridge City, Texas, recently became the first city in the world to set a speed limit for pedestrians. The seemingly odd decision came after a rather peculiar incident took place a few months back.
A man dressed as a blue hedgehog allegedly ran around downtown Bridge City yelling “Gotta go fast” and “I’m Sonic”. A woman called the police after being passed by the man several times. Upon arriving at the scene, police measured the man’s speed to be up to 75 mph. The speed limit for cars in downtown Bridge City is 30 mph.
A picture of the hedgehog, shot by a bystander withia high-speed camera.
The matter ended in the U.S. Supreme Court after prolonged negotiations between
plaintiff and
The police we unable to stop the Hedgehog man since he had not broken any laws. He continued to roam the streets for a few hours before disappearing. After the incident the State of Texas realized the direct danger the woman had been in and called for change. Upon trying to pass a bill limiting the allowed speed for pedestrians, a man calling himself “Batman” filed a lawsuit against the State of Texas, opposing the bill.
right to freedom of movement whereas the State of Texas raises the question why any pedestrian would be allowed to travel faster than a car downtown. “The State of Freedom” ended up winning the Batman Vs. the State of Texas case, limiting the speed of pedestrians to 60 mph or less.
The featured feature feature feature
feature's featured feature feature
featured featured feature features.
Michael Bay, director of Facing Faces. Here shown doing what he loves most: blowing stuff up and making money
The movie had a budget of $300 and was directed by the famous director Michael Bay mostly famous for featuring exploding features in his featured movies. Bay was quoted as saying that “it was a blast directing a movie of this caliber”. Since it was released, the movie “Facing Faces” has made over $15 worldwide and rumours are circulating that it will be awarded a Boscar, the most prestigious prize in the movie making industry. Bay states that he is planning a heptology, with the four upcoming movies already in
production. Speculation about Megan Fox being featured in at least three of the sequels has been confirmed.
Chickens banned from crossing the road
The short section of the I-26 has for a long time been a cause of concern and controversy. Much too often the road is blocked, not by traffic, but by emergency personnel forced to save people who attempted to cross the road.
“They overestimate their own bravery and freak out in the middle of the road. Then they are essentially trapped in the middle of traffic as cars go really fast on both sides of them.” explained Carlos Heaven, the deputy police officer.
Every year ambulance and police personnel are called to the spot on an average of 75 times, equivalent to more than once a week. This takes time away from actual crises.
To prevent more situations like these, some unusual measures have been taken: The emergency personnel has had enough of these kinds of calls and have recently been cleared to put up a sign reading: “No chickens allowed to cross the road. Crossing is at one's own risk.” The deputy police officer hopes that the threat at
least will prevent most people from risking their life when they know that no help will come for them.
We spoke with Helen Mortimer, a spokesperson from SACL(Save-A-Chickens-Life), about whether this new ban in contrast to Mark Hannigan's opinion instead worsens the life of people with the chicken-handicap.
“Well, overall we from SACL support and are thankful for the county putting this ban in place. Though the chickens now must take a longer and less convenient way to get to the city centre, we believe the lack of suffering from horrific accidents, and hold ups in traffic will make up for it. Not to mention an increase in happy emergency service personnel.”
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test
Group
A study at St. George's University of London seeking to determine a link between obesity and pancreatic cancer has been postponed by the MHRA (Medicines and Healthcare Products Regulatory Agency). The reason? According to the agency, the sample size of the study was far too small for it to be able to provide what they consider statistically significant results. This has sparked outrage amongst the researchers, led by Dr. Sidney Farber, who claim that “the total mass of the subjects should be more than sufficient”. The research team is now expanding the study to the US with the help of a medical center in New York.
The study, which has a sample size of 100, aims to determine whether or not obese people are more likely to develop pancreatic cancer, as compared to those with a healthier
Giant discovered in Swedish water
You might have heard of the Loch Ness Monster that inhabits the lake Loch
Ness in Scotland. Rumor has it a 10,000 year old creature is lurking
beneath the surface. There is plenty of evidence supporting the existence of
the beast, as several people have seen the animal and few have managed to
capture it on camera. Throughout history folklores similar to the Loch Ness
Monster have been told and embraced. People tend to believe in only what
is proven by science but what if there is more than meets the eye?
On September 10th a girl went out on her daily walk and passed
by the lake Fjällnora, near Uppsala, when she encountered something
frightening. Whilst strolling along the boardwalk on a windless day she
abruptly stopped when a shadow in the water caught her eye. At first she
mistook it for a fallen tree but then a rippling effect spread when bubbles
broke the surface of the water. Her interest grew when she realized her
first assumption was incorrect and wanted to take a closer look.
What she saw was a shadow resembling the contours of a dinosaur,
like the ones she had seen in the movie Jurassic Park. The shadow enlarged
as the creature was approaching and as in these days of social media she
whipped out her phone from her pocket and took a photograph. Because of
this rare sight the young woman contacted us and shared her incredible
story along with the picture she managed to take.
The last few days several locals have been to the lake in the hope of
catching a glimpse of the supernatural animal. Just like the Loch Ness
Monster there are some who consider this story true and others who deny
the existence of any kind of mythical creatures. Could this be the new
conspiracy theory that will spread throughout the world and challenge the
scientific beliefs of today?
Earlier this week several ducks were banned from the local duck pond. It
started out as a mere gag, but within minutes escalated, ending with a
warrant for arrest of the two rouge ducks. They had been disturbing the
visitors of the pond all afternoon, throwing several tantrums and biting
children. One of the ducks even stole a watch from a middle-aged man,
which is when the police were contacted. Arriving at the scene, the officer
on location began his search for the criminals with only a couple of stray
feathers as clues. Several acquaintances of the ducks were interviewed for
further leads.
The birds in question have a criminal record from before Thursday’s event,
among their crimes are theft, assault and vulgar language. The police have
been gathering complaints concerning the ducks in question, and several
witnesses have come forth willing to testify in court.
The ducks were last spotted Friday night, headed towards the ghetto at the
nearby zoo. This is a representation of how the ducks may look whilst on
the road. The police will take all necessary measures and use all available
resources to find the perpetrators and restore justice to the duck pond,
ensuring the safety of the park.
Two weeks ago 38 year old Angelina Evans was rushed into hospital with severe seizures and frothing after taking a vaccine against tetanus. Doctors immediately confirmed she had symptoms similar to those of rabies. The symptoms started about three weeks after the vaccine shot was taken.
At 11 pm this morning the woman died in her hospital-bed. Her family barely recognized Angela during her last week alive, since the meningitis caused effects to the central nervous system which also led to behavioral changes.
Five hours after she was hospitalized, the doctors could confirm that it was rabies. Dr. James Brown, head of the Disease Prevention Institute's epidemiologist center in the zoonosis area, says that it’s most likely the rabies-source was from the syringe. “Angelina had not been abroad nor in contact with bats, from which it was concluded that it was the syringe that presumably contained the virus. Angelina was additionally not vaccinated against rabies before.” says Brown. “Rabies is caused by lyssavirus. In addition to the classic rabies virus, there are other light viruses that can also cause a rabies-like illness. This is very improbable, or unimaginable. We have never in medical history faced a case like this.”
Her first symptoms began with feeling discomfort and pain around the site where the syringe was inserted, which she at first thought might be an early symptom of infection. Later on she started to get initial general symptoms such as fever and headache for about 4 days. She contacted the health center who said it sounded like flu, and then advised her to call again if it got worse. Her husband called the emergency unit three weeks after feeling anxiety, confusion, hallucinations and aggressiveness. They said she should come in right away. Besides the mood-swings she also suffered seizures and cramps in swallowing, which led to the froth. After one week at the hospital she was barely contactable and also paralyzed. In patients with encephalitis, the disease is almost always fatal within 14 days. Angelina died later that week.
The family are now suing the vaccine agency for the cause of Angelina’s death and have been given an interim amount of 200,000$.
Hospitals Are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
BREAKING NEWS
Several doctors, all of whom are currently employed at a hospital in Nottallatall, Michigan, U.S.A, recently announced that they are joining forces to file a lawsuit against the hospital, with the underlying reason being the hospital’s repeated failures to meet the 10 foot ceiling height requirements of the 7 foot doctors.
Aym Heigh, M.D., is the 7-foot doctor who originally took the case to trial back in 2005, where it opened a major, albeit short lived controversial discussion on nationwide television before eventually being overruled by the Supreme Court.
instinctively rubbed the considerable indentation on her forehead which had formed after years of bumping into door frames. Another plaintiff, Dr. Hees Long, recalls an instance where one of his patients who was originally sick with the flu suffered a severe infection which resulted in intensive care, because every time Dr. Long would attempt to enter her room, he would hit his head and knock himself out, resulting in the patient never receiving the treatment she needed.
Dr. Long outside the room of the patient whose health has deteriorated because of his inability to enter the room without hitting his head.
The hospital’s attorney plans on calling Dr. Nott Animour as a witness to testify against the plaintiffs’ notion that justice isn’t being served.
“I used to be a very vocal activist for the 7 foot doctors before I managed to get off my high horse and accepted the real world for what it f***ing was”, Dr. Animour told the reporters who gathered outside his home earlier this morning as he grew increasingly agitated. Animour was once the tallest of the doctors, eleven feet above ground, until his head started rubbing against the hospital ceiling and chafed his skull down to the point where his forehead now starts a quarter of an inch above his eyes, leaving a flat, jagged surface on top - which allows him to freely roam the halls of the hospital.
The 7 foot doctors demand $10 000 000 in damages for a myriad of injuries, ranging from minor facial bruising to severe brain damage as a result of the hospital’s ceilings not having the proper height necessary for the doctor’s mental and physical health to thrive, which provides a suboptimal work environment, something the doctors claim is taking its toll on the patients. Further details will be covered in tomorrow’s edition of the paper, as the trial is set to begin in the morning.
Recently the Police Department has received several reports concerning elderly
ladies forming groups, mostly to harass fit young men, though there are several
incidents where the gangs have stolen items such as biscuits, tea and even
telephone kiosks. In addition to the thefts, minor incidents have occurred,
varying from paying compliments to the younger individual when asked not to,
to more severe cases such as pushing people off the pavement when walking.
Unfortunately, as of now not much can be done to prevent a repeat of these
atrocious events.
Above, a gang of old ladies is seen carrying away a telephone kiosk they’ve just stolen
The police are working on the case while the whole town is left to wonder what
the possible explanation behind these gangs of senior citizens is. Police
speculate whether the culprits truly are old grannies or in fact dangerous
criminals in disguise. However, witnesses, victims and citizens insist that they
are indeed grannies. We have even been able to interview several of the
grannies belonging to a gang called ‘Hell's Grannies’. Some say that they “do it
for the kicks” or “it’s good fun”. However, is that really what these senile
delinquents are after? Some psychologists claim that the problem lies with their
“complete rejection of society”, “seeing their children grow up to be
accountants, stock brokers or even psychologists.” and that “they start to
wonder if it was worth it”. On the other hand, the police have announced that a
statement is set to be released this afternoon. Hopefully, further information will
be added to the perplexing incident.
After years and years of complaints legal actions have finally been taken. A group of physicians, all reaching heights over 6’9, earlier this week filed a lawsuit against their employers claiming “gruesome working environments” as well as “discrimination against tall, handsome individuals”.
“Our steady stream of complaints to the people ostensibly in charge have changed nothing, but the addition of signs above the doorways saying “Mind the non-existent gap” ensures that we are taunted every single day”, says Vincent Kellman a 7’3 doctor at Bedford Hospital, one of the driving forces of the lawsuit.
According to Dr. Whitman, 6’11, evidently another of the individuals affected by the low doorframes, many of the healthcare facilities still operated today were built in the 80’s when, more importantly, the average height of the working population had reached an all-time low. Saying this he refers to a study carried out by modern historian Gregor McDean, PhD, who has charted height fluctuations among different groups of society over the past few decades. Furthermore, only beaten by
“Jugglers”, the category “Physicians” is second on the list of groups whose average heights have risen the most the past three decades.
They have, at their workplace, had to endure the perpetual agony that is bowing one's head before ever entering a doorway, slamming your head into the operating lamps while probing the abdomen of a patient or having the break rooms microwave down at your knees.
As noted by Dr. Kellman, the doctors have several times alerted their employers of their distress. However, no action has been taken since the hospitals boards have their hands full of smearing their faces with money from the NHS and taking
irrelevant measures regarding issues such as what flowers are suitable for planting in the receptions of their hospitals.
BREAKING NEWS! FLAT EARTH CONSPIRACY THEORY PROVEN
For decades we have had good faith in the federal government, we have put
our trust in their hands, and we have let them use it for their own good.
Now, their unethical behaviour has finally been exposed and people all
a-not-so-round the world are questioning their entire existence. On the 19th
of September at 04:22 AM, a talented anonymous hacker managed to break
through the “fool-proof”firewall of Area 51, getting access to highly
classified documents regarding NASA's heinous and
unflattering
lies.
Moments ago, a couple of pictures showing the true shape of the Earth was
revealed to the public eye for the first time in human history. These
pictures that have been secured on the data stored in Area 51 are getting
more attention by the hour, and numerous perplexed people are
questioning the value of the human race and what it has accomplished
throughout the centuries. Was Columbus’ discovery of a round Earth a
flat-out
lie? He was, after all, not so trustworthy amongst indigenous people,
and so his proof of our planet being spherical could also have been a part of
his dishonest tendencies.
This is a symbol for our new era, an era in which flat Earth no longer is a lie,
but a reality”.
The Daily Scoop
has yet to receive a comment from NASA and the President
of the USA himself. There is more to come on this story.
Giant Tea Bags Protest
Police Kill Youth In Effort To Stop His Suicide Attempt
San Francisco, CA, USA. A youth was murdered when trying to commit suicide off the Golden Gate Bridge. The youth was murdered by a police officer who was attempting to prevent the tragedy. The officer was sentenced to 25 years in prison.
In the city of San Francisco, CA, USA, a terrible tragedy occurred yesterday when a young 16 year old boy attempted to commit suicide from the Golden Gate Bridge. This, however, was stopped by a San Francisco police officer. The officer who was inexperienced in these types of encounters tried to stop the tragedy by threatening the young man. The officer told the boy to stay away from the edge or he would open fire. When the boy refused, the police officer shot a warning shot towards the youth. He accidentally got in the line of fire and was hit. The shot made him lose his balance and fall off the Golden Gate Bridge.
The boy died from the fall and was reported immediately by the officer who shot him. The body of the youth was recovered by a police diver team who confirmed him dead. It was taken to a
morgue for further inspections. The officer who shot the boy was taken to the San Francisco Police Department where he was to be interrogated.
Height discrimination at the
YLNMTCFFRI
A court case has recently been opened following a lawsuit by seven doctors working at the YLNMTCFFRI, which is short for Your Local Neighbourhood Medical Treatment Center For Foot Related Injuries, in the tri-state area. Wehave spoken to Dave, head of the orthopedic division, who is livid, and is demanding that the people responsible for the Center’s construction to be raked over the coals for their discrimination against tall people.
We’re standing outside the YLNMTCFFRI. It is lovely, and has a beautiful outdoors park and you can clearly see that the gardener has put a lot of meticulous attention to detail and effort to achieve this. Some of its residents are walking outside while having seemingly deep conversations. The whole area has a wonderful aura to it. We have arranged a rendezvous at one of the benches with one of the doctors behind the a recent lawsuit regarding height-discrimination in the work environment.
“Right after the construction of the center was complete, I was excited.. My doctor-friends and I were delighted―over the moon, as it were―but quickly we came to understand that there was a big fly in the ointment. Only when you first enter do you realise how out of scale everything is: The steps of the staircases are absurdly high, making it more of a climb than a walk to use them; The elevators aren’t any better since the buttons are out of reach due to how inappropriately high they are placed. And those were only few of many corpus delicti to be found.” he said, and apparently he wasn’t the only one to think this way.
He showed us a picture of the interior and, to our eyes, the individual stair-steps looked to be reasonably steep. Telling him this, he decided to stand up from the bench and stand beside the table, which previously had concealed the latter half of his body. In front of us was now a man the imperial-length of the organ he treats for a living: woah. And all his six colleagues shared this peculiar trait.
Husband put rat poison in wife’s tea -
“as a health cure”
Early Sunday morning Nicoletta Beneventi, 49, was admitted to Luigi Sacco Hospital in Milan, Italy after having consumed enormous amounts of rat poison, by accident.
Sometimes the best solution to avoiding health concerns is simply to get an appointment with your doctor. This is not what Alessandro Beneventi, 51, did when his wife started to show symptoms of having been poisoned.
It all started 3 weeks ago when Mrs. Beneventi told her husband about feeling a stabbing, burning and severe pain in one of her legs. She was later diagnosed with trigeminal neuralgia, a neurological disease caused by an irritated or damaged nerve. The situation was deteriorating and as symptoms started to show, she would not only feel pain in her leg but would also suffer from sudden attacks of severe, sharp and shooting facial pain that would last from a few seconds to about 2 minutes. The symptoms would be triggered by certain actions or movements,such as talking,smiling, chewing, kissing, brushing her teeth, washing her face, putting on makeup or simply by
a cool breeze from an air conditioner.
Mr. Beneventi couldn’t stand seeing his wife in pain anymore and took matters into his own hands. He decided to do what any civilized man in modern society would do and went on the World Wide Web to look for home remedies that could relieve his wife’s symptoms with greater success than the medications that the doctors had prescribed. Mr. Beneventi found a forum in which people were discussing treatments for neuralgia and there was one post that really stood out to him. It was written anonymously and was encouraging sufferers to mix rat poison in their tea. Besides being muscle-relaxing it would also lessen or block the pain signals sent to the brain. Since the couple had been dealing with rat infestations in the past, rodenticides were very easily accessible in the household. After reading the myriad of favorable changes in health that the poison could galvanize, it was the most salient solution, in the mind of Mr. Beneventi at least.
Without any kind of disclosure to his wife about the discovered health cure, he initiated a daily dose of rat poison in her tea. The day after the poison was unconsciously ingested by Mrs. Beneventi she woke up with sudden and uncontrollable nose bleeds. In the evening that same day, she discovered various bruises that seemed to have been caused by normal contact with everyday items and were visible in proximity of her watch and rings where she’d never gotten bruises before. The symptoms were followed by abdominal cramps, fever and lethargy. Mrs. Beneventi wasn’t willing to seek care initially since she thought that what she had felt were normal symptoms of her neuralgia and that her already prescribed medications would help. However, her condition deteriorated as a week went by and she had already experienced various other symptoms such as seizures, hair loss and respiratory distress and eventually understood that it was time to seek urgent help.
The local police were contacted at once to investigate this odd occurrence. Mr. Beneventi asserted that he knew nothing of what had caused his wife’s condition to decline. But when he was later informed that there was poison involved, his reaction was peculiar. Of all the reasons behind her worsening condition, the rat poison that he had put in his wife’s tea was the last thing that he would have thought of blaming. He had long been pondering deeply upon the sudden impairment and the terrible condition of his wife but never included the dosage of rodenticides in his suspicions or calculations. He thought that his wife’s primary condition of neurological disease had simply taken an awful turn and that there were no other factors of significance in this particular case.
This late Tuesday afternoon Nicoletta Beneventi’s husband Alessandro Beneventi has been accused of having put rat poison into his wife’s tea. He is being held at the police station in Milan while the investigation is still going on to figure out the motive for the poisoning, and whether or not Mr. Beneventi’s genuinely telling the truth. So far, nothing has been found to substantiate the allegations of attempted murder. However, there’s no doubt that Mr. Beneventi’s perfunctory manner of handling the deteriorating health of his wife and him being unsuspecting of the rat poison provokes questions. Whether the intentions were good or bad, or if this is just a rare case of adult imbecility is still a baffling mystery for the police and has not yet been elucidated.
Where do babies actually come
from?
Money may not grow on trees, but did you know that something else does? Babies!
The old story about the stork bringing the baby to the parents has proved to not be total nonsense according to a recent study at Oxford university. These new findings beg some questions, such as why do we think babies come from people? What are the economic pros and cons? And what consequences will this have on the future?
thinking. Previously we thought that babies derived from the mother's uterus, but this explanation has been rendered false. That is due to the fact that nothing can grow inside people beside diseases, and one disease
in particular, Hyperdepshycomulierem. Hyperdepshycomulierem causes
us to believe that it is actually women who give birth to all human beings. However, the research shows that we originate from trees. That is right, we originate from trees. That has been proven by taking dna samples of ripe berries which had a striking resemblance to the dna structure of newborns around the world. They named the berries “babyberries”. These berries have the same function as an egg, the only difference being that when a babyberry hatches we cannot see it, even with video cameras. The researchers said that this is due to a mechanism of the berry which conceals the fact of it containing a baby, and when it hatches it releases a dust which causes an internal breakdown in recording devices, that lasts for a short period of time giving the berry time to disappear and the infant time to be brought to its parents by storks. We cannot see these storks bringing us our babies due to the same dust as the berries release. The arrival of the child is timed perfectly to the burst of the stomach. The liquid flowing out of the mother is not just water, it is actually the disease which is transforming itself to regular h20. This has been proven by
checking the chemical structure of the fluid inside the stomach of the mother to be. The chemical structure is really close to sulphuric acid, with the difference of one more oxygen atom in impossibrrr which Mr. Sundén
has chosen to call it. The chemical formula of impossibrrr is H2SO5 which is
impossible according to our textbooks. This forces us to further research this fascinating subject to discover how this can even be possible. However, that is a subject for another day.
These recent findings have caused leading scientists to think about why we look different from one another, and they think that is due to contrasting types of wood. For instance, “berry” from an oak tree will not produce the same looking baby as a “berry” from a red pine tree. We would have the power to control the final product of the berries if that would turn out to be true with GMO. That would result in no one being born with disadvantages such as blindness and paralysis.
“The most obvious consequence these findings will have is where the flow of money that right now goes into the Maternity Ward will go. We now know that women do not give birth and therefore the whole Maternity Ward will become obsolete. This will leave a whole field of workers unemployed and lead to the world's largest unemployment in
history. It’s now up to the governments to decide what to do with the excess money and how to set these people in work. Finally, Theresa May might have enough money to actually give the justice system a pay rise; she gave them a ‘rise’ of 1,7% when our inflation was at 2,9%, do the math, that’s not a rise, that’s a cut. Some of my colleagues believe that the money won’t go to existing jobs nor create jobs for the ones who lost their, it will probably go into future research.”
“But how about profit? Is there any money to be gained from these findings?”
“Well yes of course! Here the governments have a huge responsibility, we’re on the brink of a modern slave trade. By killing off the storks and cutting off access to the babyberry trees individuals can create a situation in which they hold the power to decide who should have babies and what reality they will grow up in. Depending on who owns the babyberry forests we might end up in a society where people be grown to serve the needs of the elite, humans will no longer be an economic reliability for companies, they will be a onetime payment and then the company owns them. Unless the states act instantly we will have a massive growth in factory economy and a non-existent private one”
Unfortunately we didn’t have time for much else but you can see all of
professor John D. Hemsvere’s speculations in his new documentary Light
