Communication
Communication is the process of sending and receiving messages. It is a way to get information, learn, and interact. Our needs are met through communication.
What is the importance of communication why do we study it? 1. 61% of your day is spent communicating.
2. Communication helps you build strong relationships and has been shown to help people live longer.
3. Communication shapes your identity. It defines who you are as a person based on how people respond to you.
4. Communication allows for escapism and relaxation.
5. Communication allows you to get what you want out of life. (ex: friends, happiness, money)
Types of Communication
Intrapersonal – Communication with yourselfInterpersonal – Communication between two people
Small Group – Communication with a small group of people usually to accomplish a task Public – One person talking to a large group
Mass – One or two people talking to a very large group
Nonverbal Communication
Nonverbal communication is . . . all other communication other than ______________ themselves.
What is good nonverbal communication, anyway?
Nonverbal communication can supplement or replace verbal communication (60-90% of all communication is nonverbal).
Nonverbal communication helps to regulate interaction. (We know when to speak and when to remain silent.)
It helps to emphasize a message.
Posture and gesture
Shaking hands; slouching Face and Eyes
Eye contact shows your listening
Facial expressions show you understand the conversation and you know what you’re talking about
Voice
Volume Pitch Touch
The most basic form of communication Depends on if you like touch
Physical Appearance
How you look, dress, do your hair, etc. It’s not who you are deep down inside. Clothing
Nice Clothes – make a good first impression Formal – tend to be more polite
Uniforms – typically get more respect
Studies show the more you dress up the more respect you get. Distance
How far you stand apart
Public distance – 12 + feet (speaker and crowd) Social – 4-7 feet (teacher/student or acquaintances) Personal – 18 inches–4 feet (friends)
Intimate – 18 inches or less (husband and wife) Environment
Where you are from
The better the environment, the better you feel about yourself.
The worse the environment you live in, the less you feel about yourself and the less motivated you become.
Territory
Permanent – house, town, country
Semi-permanent – library, a chair, spot in the lunch room; is usually marked by personal items like books, clothing, etc.
Vocal Interferences
People use these words during pauses not to get interrupted Like, you know, uh, err, umm, ah
LISTENING
Listening and __________________ are NOT the same thing.
Hearing is a process in which sound waves strike the eardrum and cause vibrations that are transferred to the brain.
Listening is when the brain takes these electrochemical signals and creates meaning. Hearing a message means you “heard” or received the message. Listening means you understood and responded to the message.
Listening is not natural and requires effort.
Positive Listeners
Informational Listening: listening to understand another person’s message (i.e. school)
Be mindful – choose to listen carefully even if the information is complex, difficult, or boring
Control obstacles – minimize distractions
Ask questions – ask for clarification or to elaborate a message
Use aids to recall – take good notes, talk to people, use recorders
Organize information – take information and put it in an order that works well for you
60% is listening
15% is speaking
15% is reading
10% is writing
Critical Listening
: Judging the quality of a message to decide whether to accept
or decline.
Listen for information before evaluating – don’t judge without listening
Evaluate credibility – is the speaker competent?
Examine evidence – think about what you’re told and how it is proven. Is there support or evidence?
Examine emotions – What are they saying emotionally to persuade you?
Empathetic or relational listening
: build a relationship or help the speaker solve
a problem.
Be mindful – push yourself to understand the feeling. What lies between the words?
Suspend judgment – avoid excessive judgment; the speaker may become defensive.
Understand another’s perspective – step out of your own point of view.
Paraphrase – restate in your own words the message that you thought the speaker sent. Minimal encouragers – nod head, eye contact, etc.
Express support – you don’t have to agree. Be sensitive and responsive without evaluation.
Negative Types of Listeners
Pseudo
– They seem like they are listening, but they are not. (fake listener)
Selective
– They respond to only parts of the conversation that interest them.
Ambush
– Listen carefully but only because they want to attack the speaker.
Defensive
– Take innocent comments as personal attacks.
Reasons that lead to poor listening:
Effort – it’s hard work to listen and not talk.
Message overload – we are bombarded with messages and information all
the time.
Rapid Thought - we are capable of understanding up to 300 words a minute
but average people only speak up to 100-140 wpm.
Noise – things distract us like our worries or background noise, etc.
Assumptions – we assume we know what people are going to say, so we
tune them out.
Talking is more fun.
Listening Barriers:
There are several barriers to listening, and each of us brings to bear our own
unique barriers. Here are some of the most common barriers:
Cultural Background: How we were raised, the beliefs of our families and friends, our experiences, and many other factors about how we listen and attach meaning to the messages we hear.
Gender: Research tells us that males and females listen differently. Females tend to be more aware of the mood of the conversation, and males tend to listen for facts.
Age: Generally, younger students have shorter attention spans; on the other hand, as a student’s attention span lengthens, other factors related to age (i.e. spring fever) may reveal themselves as barriers to listening.
Physical Environment: Factors such as ambient sound, temperature, comfort level, and light can act as barriers to listening. Also, the physical time of the message and time restraints can also affect listening.
Psychological Status: Effective listening can be hindered if you are under a large amount of stress or mentally distracted.
Attitude: We are all predisposed to listen and respond either positively or negatively to messages once we are aware of the topic.
