Bobby Rio - 88½ Ways To Read Her Mind

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ob Judge and I have a the-ory that with every girl ex-ists a “window of opportunity”. During that “window” you have an opportunity to ask her out, go for the kiss, and take her home. But when that window closes, you have to start from scratch again building up the attraction.

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www.TheMagneticLifestyle.com

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This book is copyright 2014 with all rights reserved. It is illegal to copy, distribute, or create derivative works from this book in whole or in part or to contribute to the copy-ing, distribution, or creating of derivative works of this book. When you purchased this book, you agreed to the following statement:

only. You are responsible for your own behavior, and none of this book is to be considered legal or personal advice.”

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IntroductIon: Core Concepts...4

Part 1: The Right Frames of Mind...11

Part 2: Signs A Girl Wants You To Approach Her...32

Part 3: Signs A Girl You Just Met Is Into You...39

Part 4: Signs A Girl You Just Met Is NOT Into You...58

6 Ways To Actively Find Out If A Girl Is Into You....69

Part 5: Signs A Girl You’ve Known Awhile Is Into You....76

Part 6: Signs A Girl You’ve Known Awhile Is NOT Into You..86

Part 7: Reading her “Sexual” Signals”...95

Part 8: Signs You Should Be Sending To A Girl...101

3 thIngs To Keep In Mind As You Go Forward...126

remInder checklIst...132

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c o r e c o n c e p t s

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he majority of this book deals with “de-coding” a woman’s signals to figure out whether you have a chance with her of if you’re just wasting your time. Understanding the signals a woman is sending also helps you to decide when you should ask her for a date, go for a kiss, and even when it’s time to take things to the next level.

To ensure you make the best use of what you’re about to learn, it’s crucial you first understand a few “big ideas” that put a woman’s behavior into context...

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oppoRTUNITy

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ob Judge and I have a theory that with every girl exists a “window of opportunity.”

During that “window” you have an opportu-nity to ask her out, go for the kiss, and take her home.

But when that window closes, you have to start from scratch again building up the at-traction.

This is why its crucial you NOTICE and CAPITALIZE on the opportunity when it presents itself.

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There is an even more important reason:

Girls expect things to “happen quick” when there is chemistry…

They expect to get “swept away”...

So the longer it takes for you to make your move, get her out on a date, sleep with

her… the more she starts thinking “there must not be anything here.”

She’ll even begin to backward rationalize and start finding reasons why you’re NOT

worth meeting up with, why she should NOT sleep with you, or why she should relegate your sorry ass to FRIEND ZONE PRISON.

This is why in both our Unlock Her Legs pro-gram and Magnetic Messaging we design everything to happen fast.

the Window of opportunity

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It creates the illusion of chemistry.

Now, if you’re currently in the friend zone with a girl, chances are you missed your window of opportunity.

The good news is that window will open back up.

And this time, you’ll be ready for it.

Which brings us to the next important con-cept before we go further…

the Window of opportunity

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R

ob and I have a second theory that is extremely important for you

to understand: Attraction is NOT black or white.

This means that a girl’s opinion of you can change by the year, month, week, day, and even by the hour.

Now, this comes with good news, and bad news...

The good news is that even if you didn’t

make a stellar first impression you can still win her over and get her wanting you…

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Even if you’re not her “type” or she only sees you as a “friend”…

Even if you’ve already messed up…

And even if she’s dating someone else and acts like you don’t even exist…

You ALWAYS have the ability to push that “attraction needle” hotter. And make her want you more.

But there is some bad news too...

The bad news is just because a girl feels

attraction for you today, does not mean she’ll feel the same level of attraction for you tomorrow.

Just like you can ALWAYS move the “attraction

her attraction is not black or white

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her attraction is not black or white

level” hotter… you can always do things that will get things “colder” or drive her away.

This is why it’s critical to understand the signs she’s giving you.

When you’re able to read the signals she’s sending, you can adjust your game plan as needed.

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t h e r I g h t f r a m e s o f

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t can be very frustrating to try to read what a girl is thinking and figure out whether or not she is interested in you. Rob and I work with A LOT of private coaching clients and one of the most common things we deal with is helping a guy decipher the words and actions of some girl.

I’m sure you’ve experienced it before. You are talking to a girl in a bar, club or party, and

you’re just not sure how well it’s going. Should you continue the conversation? ask for her

number? or even ask her if she wants to come

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back to your place?

If you’ve ever let those questions prevent you from closing the deal with a woman- then this will be the most beneficial report you’ve ever read.

Because you’re going to capitalize on every op-portunity that arises for you from here on out.

And if you follow along with the ongoing training lessons we’ll be sending via email… LOTS of opportunities will be arising.

Those lessons will be coming from “Bobby Rio” so when you see them, make sure you open up and read them.

the right frames of mind

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how this book

Will help you

A girl almost always gives off subtle signs about what she is thinking, but most guys don’t know what these signs are.

In this report, we’re going to discuss the various signals that girls give in depth. You’ll learn to recognize them quickly so that you can decide early on in a conversa-tion if it’s time to escalate your flirting or cut your losses and walk away.

When you’re texting with a girl (particularly if you’re using the Key Lock Sequence) you’ll

know exactly when to pull the trigger and ask her to meet up.

We’ll be discussing plenty of different types of signs and behavior in the guide, so you will not have to worry about missing one

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subtle gesture. Once you know what to look for, it’s easy to read what a girl is thinking about you.

Learning these all-important signals will not only help you with girls you have just met, but also with girls that you have been dating or with whom you already have

some sort of relationship with.

Maybe you have a girl’s phone number or you have hung out with her casually on a few occasions, and now you’re wonder-ing: what’s the next step? Keep reading

and you’ll see that learning the signals can make your decision very easy.

Or maybe you’re in the friend zone with a girl, and you want to try to figure out if or when you should make your move. This guide will make sure you strike while the iron is hot.

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there’is more to the

equation than learing

the signs

Reading a girl’s initial interest level is actu-ally only part of the equation.

There is another important tool to have: the correct mindset.

It will be much easier to approach girls and use your signal-sensing skills if you are in the right frame of mind. It will be much easier to go for the kiss, invite her back to your place, or make her your girlfriend (if you’re following The Scrambler) if your

Mindset is SOLID.

We’ll share what thoughts you need to focus on when you are with a girl.

Of course, part of what you are going to learn in this book will be related to the signals a

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girl gives off when she is not interested in you. Once you see these negative signs, it can be difficult to move on, especially if you feel that you have some sort of

emotion-al connection. I’ll share some pointers that will help you maintain the mindset that

will allow you to walk away when you know its time to cut your losses.

Having the correct frame of mind before you even start talking to a woman is very important. So important, in fact, that we need to discuss it first before moving on to learn to read a woman’s level of interest. So lets discuss what needs to be on your mind when you are approaching a woman and when you are trying to figure out her level of interest.

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t is a fact of life: women aren’t interest-ed in guys who are overly insecure.

If you are lacking self-confidence, a woman will probably be able to tell, and

you’ll be at a disadvantage before you even start the conversation.

You can avoid giving off the wrong vibe by convincing yourself that the woman who you are approaching is already interested. This will put the odds in your favor every

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Intesrest

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time you start a conversation with a girl. This mindset can be especially effective when talking to women who have not yet decided if they like you. Women find con-fidence attractive and so a confident vibe could be the difference between going home with a girl and going back to your place alone to wonder what went wrong. The same rule applies for a girl who you al-ready know or have alal-ready started dating... Many guys, after they start dating a girl for a while, will start analyzing every conversa-tion and may start feeling insecure about their future prospects.

Often, this is a case of simply over-thinking things. However, if your insecurity starts to show, it may chase the girl away, especially

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if she was initially drawn to you because of your confidence.

So, even after you have scored those first dates, continue assuming that the girl is at-tracted to you.

Always, always work from a place of con-fidence until you see signals that tell you otherwise.

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’ve found that most of the time, people are generally able to intuitively read a situation. Unless they are completely delusional or have worked themselves into a state of paranoia, they can usually sense a vibe quite well.

If you are talking to a girl and you feel a strong connection or a certain sense of ro-mance, chances are she feels the same

thing. If you’re dating a girl and you feel like

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everything’s really going good–that she re-ally likes you–chances are it’s true.

Of course, this can work the other way as well. If you are not connecting or feeling some sort of chemistry with a girl, chances are she doesn’t either, and it’s better to cut and run than to try and force the conversa-tion. If you’re dating a girl and you feel that she’s blowing you off or she’s just a tease and she doesn’t really want to be with you, chances are you’re right.

It can be difficult to trust your instincts, especially when they are telling you some-thing that you don’t want to hear. But it is almost always the best policy.

That being said, double check your “instincts” against the signs we’re going to present to you in this guide...

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nother way you can get past your hopes and get to the truth of a sit-uation is to look at yourself from an outsider’s perspective.

If you were looking at yourself, what would you say? What would you say if you saw a good friend doing what you are doing now? It could be positive: “Hey she’s into you.” Or it could be the opposite: “She’s not worth it,

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from an oUtsIders’

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come on! It’s time to move on.”

A lot of times, when we take ourselves and our emotions and insecurities out of the equation and pretend we are looking at someone else, it all becomes very clear. It’s natural to make excuses about why

you don’t want to give up, especially if you like a girl a lot. She might continuously

blow you off and make excuses about why she can’t hang out with you. You could tell yourself all sorts of things to convince your-self that you’re still in the game.

However, if you saw someone else in your situation, you’d simply say, “Sorry dude, it really looks like she’s not into you.”

The same idea can be applied to first meet-ing with a girl in a nightlife settmeet-ing. Look at

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her from an outsider’s perspective. What is her body language? What is she doing and saying?

You might have even already done this in a bar, maybe even subconsciously. You’ll glance at a girl and guy and know almost immediately what his prospects are just by watching her body language and the way she is reacting to him.

So take a second to step back and pretend like you are watching yourself from some-one else’s point of view. You will take your ego out of the equation and get to the real-ity of the situation very quickly.

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EVER.

We coach a lot of guys over the phone and over email. Many want to talk about a girl that they’ve met and that they really, really, really like. They may have even told her how they feel. Perhaps she didn’t seem too excited to hear this, and now the guy wants to know how to pursue her.

Here’s the thing: when you decide that you really like a girl–maybe you’ll even think

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lIke a gIrl before

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you’re in love with her–but you haven’t slept with her yet, you’ve already lost. The game’s over!

Chances are you’re not going to get her. You’re not in the right frame of mind, be-cause you’re already too emotionally

in-vested. You’re not going to make good deci-sions. You’re going to be thinking with your emotions rather than using the type of cool logic that is necessary to get the girl.

This is one of the main reasons we have guys follow a very specific plan laid out in

The Scrambler.

What you want to do is make a commit-ment to yourself that you’re not going to let yourself get wrapped up in any girl un-til after you’ve slept with her.

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After that, you can let down your guard a little, but you’ve still got to play it cool. This can be hard for some guys to do, espe-cially when they are romantics and are prone to getting obsessed with one girl.

But you’ve got to keep a cool mindset. Just remember, very, very few guys get a girl that they become obsessed with.

The goal is to get HER obsessed with YOU.

And you can’t do that if you’re already ob-sessed with her.

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hen it comes to women, a lot of us let our egos get involved. When a girl starts slipping

away, guys want to recapture that “high” that they felt when they knew that a girl was really into them (or at least when they thought that she was really into them).

In gambling, the terminology for pursuing something that does not have a positive expected return is called “chasing the loss”. The gambler keeps pursuing the “winning

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high” even though it’s obvious that the odds are less and less in his favor.

The same idea can be applied to dating. A lot of guys chase a woman after they have obviously lost her. They can chase her for months or even longer. They are not real-ly trying to get her back; they are trying to recapture that feeling that they had when they knew she liked them.

When they are chasing a loss, guys are usu-ally oblivious to the fact that their social life is in shambles. They haven’t met any other girls. They focused all their energy on a pursuit that isn’t going to have a happy ending.

So the rule is: never chase, instead erase. Erase her from your mind and move on.

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Now that we have the right mindset, we can move on to learn the signs that can tell you that a girl is into you. These signs will be evident regardless of the setting.

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hasing the loss is a human instinct. We chase that which retreats from us. It is a BIG component of The Scrambler.

For now, just realize that you can actual-ly use this as a weapon for your benefit. When you sense a girl is slipping away. PULL BACK. And get her chasing the loss. This aRTicLeexplains the benefit of that move. During that “window” you have an opportunity to ask her out, go for the kiss, and take her home. But when that window closes, you have to start from scratch again building up the attraction.

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If you are talking to a girl in a club or bar, you should be looking for the same signs as you would if you were talking to a girl in a coffee shop, in a classroom or even just on the sidewalk.

These are the signs that you will see if a

girl is into you. These signs might not mean that a girl wants to jump into bed with you or that she even wants to date you, but they are signs that you should continue the con-versation because, chances are, something good is going to happen...

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sIgns a gIrl Wants yoU

to approach her

d

o you know the easiest way to get good at approaching women?

You learn to spot the ones that are sending you the signals that they want you to ap-proach them.

Yes, whether you realize it or not, every day, every time you go out, there are women who are trying their damndest to get your atten-tion and to get you to approach them.

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signs a girl wants you to approach her

I’ve talked in depth about this with a lot of extremely hot girls.

And girls will tell me how the most

frus-trating thing in the world for them is when they hear a guy say, “Oh you’re a girl you can get laid anytime you want…”

And the girl is like, “Sure, if I put a sign up that said I’m looking to go home with someone…”

But short of that, these women go out all the time… sometimes they’re looking for some male affection, sometimes its that time of the month and they’re just freaken horny, sometimes they’ve just been dumped and their looking for a revenge lay…

Yes, they send all the signals and guys just don’t pickup what they’re putting down. I

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think you’ll agree, that there is no easier girl to approach then one that is actively trying to

get your attention and hinting that she wants to talk to you.

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uys that appear to

be extraordinari-ly good with girls usually have amazing “filter mechanism” that allows him to zone in on the girl where his odds are extremely good. Mastering the skill of spot-ting the “easy scores” will GREATLY increase your success in bars and club environments.

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she makes her way over towards you, and for no reason stands in your general area.

Here’s what I mean. If you’re at a large un-crowded bar and you and your friend are talking in one corner. And you no-tice two girls on the other side of the bar. And then, twenty minutes later, for ap-parently no reason, they are now on your side of the bar. There is a reason for that.

she’is with a group and she “accidentally” separates herself from the group.

Or she might just keep find-ing excuses to walk past you...

If she’is already close to you, she opens her body language to be more inviting so you see she’is available to approach.

In that case you’ll notice that she tries to make herself appear available. She won’t be playing with her phone or doing anything that signals, “leave me alone”.

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or maybe you_{'ve had a girl} accidentally bump into you.

Did you take advantage of it? Or did you just let her apologize and keep walk-ing? (If so you missed an opportunity!)

one of the most obvious things a woman will do when she wants to talk to you is eavesdrop on your conversation.

She’ll noticeably laugh at one of your jokes she’s overheard, or even throw her own opinion in to try to get your attention.

maybe she’ll even drop some’

thing near you hoping that you’ll pick it up.

If she can’t think of anything to say, a lot of times she’ll do something physical to get your attention. Another form of this is asking you for help with something.

women aren’t stupid; they know

you need an opener so they'll try their damndest to give you one.

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something she’ll try to let you see so that you can ask her about it. If she’s look-ing at somethlook-ing or someone she’ll talk out loud to herself so that you real-ize she wants you to comment on it, too. She’s handing you an opener on a silver platter.

Now those are the obvious ones… Of course there are some girls who are subtler and with those girls, you’ll have to pay closer attention to body language.

If she catches you looking, she might push her hair out of the way so you can see her face better

Or she adjusts her clothes after look-ing at you. She is primmlook-ing her-self to appear more attractive for you.

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she’will exaggerate her moves or act a little odd.

If she catches you looking at her, and she’s interested, she’ll try to ap-pear like she’s having a good time. She’ll exaggerate her laughing, she’ll dance in place, and she’ll be do-ing somethdo-ing to keep your attention. She’s trying to make

her-self seem like a “cool girl.”

The fact is: the signs are there. But how about once you start talking to her...

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sIgns a gIrl yoU jUst met

Is Into yoU

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oticing signs that girl is interest-ed in you is helpful for a number of reasons. For example, if you’re like most guys, you probably won’t try to move an interaction forward by asking a girl out, going for a kiss, or inviting her back to your place, unless you’re at least relatively sure she’s into you and going to accept…

If that’s something you’re currently doing then it might surprise you that Rob and I feel that is one of the LEAST practical

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signs a girl you just met is into you

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cations of recognizing the signs of an interest-ed girl.

Don’t think just because she’s giving you pos-itive signs that she’s necessarily giving you permission. Doing so often leads to a bad call either way: you might wait too long for a sign before escalating and miss the window of op-portunity OR you might believe a date or a kiss is “in the bag” because you noticed a sign and then feel crushed if she doesn’t immediately comply with your advance.

iMPoRTanT: A girl accepting or reject-ing your advances is often not a result of how attracted she is to you. Girls will often “reject” guys at first for a number of reasons: she’s not comfortable yet, she doesn’t want you to think she’s “easy,” she’s testing you to see how you’ll react under pressure, etc. You should never gauge where you stand with a girl solely on how she reacted to you making a move.

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You’ll get much more out of this section if you interpret these signs like markers on a roadmap. For example, if a girl is displaying several signs that she’s into you, then it might want to focus more on getting to know and getting her to feel comfortable rather than tease her and flirt.

While flirting and teasing are the key ingredi-ents in beginning an interaction, ONLY teasing and flirting very rarely leads to quality interac-tions. Women not only crave the stimulation of laughter, excitement, and sexual tension, they also want to feel comfortable, a sense of con-nection as well as appreciation.

Noticing the signs in this section clearly means you’re headed in the right direction. But like any significant journey, rarely do you get from point A to point B in a straight line. You may need to gradually turn and move in a slightly different direction to steer things clos-er to whclos-ere you want them to go. This section will help you recognize when to do just that.

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she laughs at your jokes, even the unfunny ones.

Laughing isn’t necessarily something peo-ple do when they find something funny. It can also be a sign of approval.

This can be seen in many speeches: The speaker makes some bad joke and the au-dience laughs. It’s not because the joke was funny; it’s the audience’s way of say-ing “Yeah, we like you; we’re enjoysay-ing this.” When a girl laughs at your jokes, it is the same phenomenon. Her chuckle is a way of saying, “Hey, I like you. Keep talking.” When she’s laughing at your jokes, she’s trying to tell you she gets you and that she enjoys your company.

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she asks you if you have a girlfriend.

This can be a tough one to catch, be-cause a lot of times girls will try to find this out indirectly. Maybe you say that you went to a concert or movie, and she’ll ask, “Oh, whom did you go with?”

Or if you say you have a roommate, or if you talk about your apartment, she’ll ask you whom you live with. If you notice any of these types of questions, she’s probably interest-ed in knowing if you have a girlfriend. Of course, some girls will just ask di-rectly, in which case you don’t need to try and pick up the subtler cues. When a girl asks this question, it means that she is sizing you up and measuring your relationship potential.

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W

hen a girl calls you a player NEVER go on the defensive. Jokingly

she calls you a player, a jerk, or an asshole.

It might seem counter-intuitive, but if a woman makes this type of statement in a playful way, it’s usually a very positive sign. This kind of teasing is a form of flirting. Calling you a player is her way of test-ing you. She wants to see what you’re going to say. If a guy is insecure or isn’t scoring points with his flirtatious re-marks, she isn’t going to call him a player. She’s calling you a player because she finds herself attracted to you and she wants to know if you are really a player or if you are genuinely into her.

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play into the assumption. In fact, NEVER defend yourself to a girl period. It signals to her that you care too much and are trying to hard. Rob and I have a saying “the person who tries harder, holds less power.” And when she’s holding the

power, its impossible for her sleep with you.

she takes a sip of your drink.

You’ll be at party, a bar, or some sort of so-cial situation where drinking is involved, and a girl will ask to take a sip of your drink. Or she’ll simply take a sip without asking when you put your drink down. This is a very strong indication that she feels comfortable—comfortable enough to put her mouth where your mouth has just been. This type signal can also take oth-er forms. She might offoth-er you hoth-er drink.

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Or perhaps offer you something that she is eating. She’s showing you that she has a high level of comfort with you.

a girl might lean into you or get your attention by touching your hand or arm lightly.

These are all signs of intimacy and are a sure signal that it is time to start escalating your pursuit of the girl.

beWaRe: If you have TOO MUCH comfort with a girl it could be a sign you’re in the fRiENd zONE!

she is displaying ’nervous energy.’

When a girl is too comfortable around a guy its NOT a good sign. You should no-tice that she’s exhibiting some nervous-ness around you. If there is no nervousnervous-ness,

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then there is likely no attraction. A lot of times with girls that nervousness will man-ifest itself in rambling. Or appearing “di-sheveled” in the way she’s communicating.

she actively tries to keep the conversation going.

When your conversation hits an inevita-ble lull, she’s the one keeping it going. She might ask you questions or make re-marks. This is because she doesn’t want you to leave. If she asks, directly or indi-rectly, personal questions, that’s an even stronger indication of serious interest.

Or She Asks Questions. Women are often

very reserved when it comes to making the first move or approaching a guy in general. If she does this, she might be very out-going or she’s just REALLY into you.

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She might start by saying something like...“I think I know you from some-where” just to initially open a conversation. She will also want to know more about who you are. So pay attention to how engaged she is in the conversation. If she asks you open-ended questions that make you give a detailed response versus a yes or no response, it’s a pretty good sign she is

trying to prolong the convo and hoping to get more out of you!

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on’t feel like you have to always be the one to fill the si-lences in a conversation. Too many guys feel the need to im-mediately break the tension of silence. In a seduction tension is your friend. Be the one

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who is more comfortable with the tension. Make her do some work. Remember, the more she’s investing and working to keep you interested, the more pow-er you hold. And the more powpow-er you hold, the more attraction she feels toward you.

she teases you.

As mentioned, if she calls you a jerk or a player, it’s a good sign. ANY type of teasing is a good because it’s something people do with peo-ple that they like and are comfortable with. In the context of a male-female conversa-tion, teasing is usually a form of flirting. She may give you a nickname or just tease you about something you said or did. It’s her way of saying, “Hey, I get you, we have a connection, I feel like I can tease you.”

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she introduces you to her friends.

This can also be a bad sign if she in-troduces you and then moves into the background (that means she wants to get rid of you or trying to pawn you off on one of her less attractive friends). However, if she introduces you and then continues communicating with you, it is a very positive sign because she wants to show you off and/or get her friends’ opinion of you later because she likes you. Either way, it’s a positive sign.

she lets her friends leave to continue talking to

you.

The opposite type of situation could also be a good sign. I’ve slept with several girls very quickly and this was always the biggest indication. Perhaps the girl’s friends would be leaving, and she’d say, “I’m going to stay.”

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If a girl is staying with you in such a situ-ation, you know there’s a very good pos-sibility that she is going home with you right away. She can easily ask for your number and leave with her friends. If she stays, she’s in the mood for some-thing more. DO NOT MESS THIS UP. (Re-member earlier we talked about “window of opportunity”… this is a MAJOR ONE!) This usually happens in a bar or club, but it could also happen elsewhere, too.

she follows you to another location.

Perhaps it’s a party and there are mul-tiple rooms and her friends go into a different room while she stays be-hind with you. Or maybe you tell her you’re going to go outside for some fresh air, and she comes along with you.

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In this specific situation, her staying or fol-lowing you might not mean that she is ready to sleep with you (she can still leave with her friends later), but it is definitely a positive sign and a signal that it’s time to escalate the con-versation to more intimate subjects and heavi-er flirtso you can help hheavi-er, being extra “girlie”.

her voice will change.

When a girl is at the point in a con-versation where she wants you to kiss her, she’ll begin to talk slower, more feminine, and more seductive.

she accentuates her femininity.

This is a BIG ONE. The more feminine she portrays herself around you, the more chemistry she is feeling towards you. An example of this is pretending to not know anything about sports, acting weak,

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so you can help her, being extra “girlie”.

hinT: When a girl is acting extremely

fem-inine around you, reward her for it. Show her you notice it. And accentuate your masculinity. Here is an example...

A lot times if the topic of sports comes up the woman will exaggerate her lack of knowledge about the topic. This is an ac-tive display of her femininity. Maybe she’ll pretend to confuse football with baseball. And when a football player scores a touch down she’ll ask, “Did he hit a homerun?” She is TRYING to be cute and feminine for you. Appreciate it. Give her a smile. Act like you genuinely find it adorable. And then ex-plain that was a touchdown... and that a home run is in baseball. But make her feel like her

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gesture worked. Like she is seducing YOU.

That is one of the biggest KEYS you need to understand. Validation works when she believes that she is seducing YOU. This is a major com-ponent we discuss in Unlock Her Legs.

she will try to validate herself to you.

This is one of those things you learn to pick up on. You’ll notice that she tinues to slip things into the con-versation that makes her look good. Or she’ll steer the conversa-tion towards things that make her seem fun, cool, interesting, sexy. She’s trying to show you, “Hey, I’m a cool girl.” Pick me.

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BONUS #1:

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If she looks away first. or looks away, then

look back.

If a girl can’t hold strong eye contact it could be mean that she feels too much tension.

signs she Wants

to be kissed

Although we NEVER recommend waiting for a girl to display signs before going for the kiss, it is CRUCIAL you recognize them. If she puts herself out there, pro-viding the signs but you don’t act, the window of opportunity will quickly close.

bonus signs

too much exagerrated disinterest.

If a girl is too actively acting disinterested making comments like, “In your dreams” or, “You wish”… she is more likely flirting with you and baiting you to pursue her more.

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she holds your hand or touches you in a prolonged way.

If a girl is at the point where she knows she is going to kiss you, she’ll do things to let you know it’s TIME. One of the things she’ll often do is make an excuse to hold your hand. May-be she’ll take you by the hand to guide you through the room. Or if you’re sitting next to her, she’ll place her hand graz-ing against your leg and leave it there.

she’will linger.

This is a clue that becomes obvious towards the end of the night or the end of a date. If a girl has decided that she wants to kiss you she will linger and give you time to make your move. If you’re saying goodbye she’ll make sure not to leave too quickly. As the

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date is ending, she’ll find an excuse to linger around the parking lot. If you’re dropping her off, she won’t get out of the car right away. She’ll sit there waiting for you to make a move.

press herself harder into you when you hug.

Don’t be fooled by their warm, mushy repu-tations: hugs can be very revealing. But be careful: a lot of guys screw this up because they don’t know how to give a hug without being creepy about it. One thing I like to do is rock back and forth as you’re hugging. This alleviates the creepiness while giving her a chance to decide whether she wants the hug to continue. If you feel her trying to peel away as you hug and rock her, not good. But if she seems to get a small burst of energy and/or hugs you tighter and/ or rocks with you, it’s a great (yet subtle) sign that, not only she likes you, but also that she’s comfortable with your touch.

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sIgns a gIrl yoU jUst met

Is not Into yoU

W

ant to know a secret that any guy who is successful with women understands: time is more important than pride.

In other words, guys who are great with women would rather a girl tell them she’s not interested in the first 10 seconds rather than have a long, drawn-out conversation, only to have the girl “politely” tell him she needs to go to the bathroom…

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signs a girl you just met is not into you

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…or needs to get back to her friends…

…or offers a phone number, knowing full-well that she’s never going to meet up. (Most of the time, she has no intention of even

respond-ing.)

If you’ve ever heard a girl say (usually awk-wardly), “Well, it was really nice meeting you,” often accompanied by a pat on the shoulder or back (the “pity pat”), then you know how frus-trating and painful this can be.

Bad enough you were wrong about a girl you thought might be a future romantic or sexual prospect; you also wasted your time, energy, and emotions pursuing her.

For guys who are trying to meet girls in night-clubs or bars, this can sabotage an entire

night. While a guy is locked in a “friendly” in-teraction he’s missing countless opportunities with other girls...

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Therefore, recognizing when a girl you’ve just met is not into you is crucial for becoming

better with women.

Lots of girls will entertain a conversation with you for a number of reasons: maybe she’s just being well mannered, maybe she feels bad for you, maybe she thinks you’re entertaining (but not attractive)…

Whatever her reason, it’s your responsibility to be honest with yourself, admit you’re not getting anywhere, and move on. Doing so will save you time, which is so much more import-ant than saving face.

Sure, your pride may sting a bit if you walk

away without a phone number, or if you fail to “impress” your friends or wingman with how long you can keep a conversation going, and you may even sometimes cause her to rudely reject you.

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In the long run, however, it’s only going to help you. You’re setting yourself up to meet more girls—ones you actually have a legiti-mate chance with!

So the next you find yourself talking with a girl you just met, not only should you have an eye peeled for the signs in this section, you also have to remember not to let your pride get in the way of your dating life.

If a girl is displaying one or more of the signs in this section, you don’t necessarily have to cut and run right away (in fact, we recommend you don’t). However, you should adjust what you’re doing. If she continues to give off signs she’s not interested, you need to make the

call: is this worth your time, attention, energy, emotion, and (sometimes) money?

It’s always your decision…but learning and looking for the signs ensures you make much better informed decision.

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she complains that she's tired.

When a girl is in to you, she’ll have enough energy to continue a conversation no matter what time it is. You probably know this feel-ing: when you are into someone and you are with them, you seem to have unlimited en-ergy. Time isn’t even a part of the equation.

perhaps, a girl doesn’t

vocalize her tiredness, but she keeps yawning...

This is major cue that she is not interest-ed. She is bored, and it’s time for you to move on. Girls will fake enjoyment if they’re into you. She’ll hide the fact she’s tired.

she never asks you your name.

Exchanging names might not be the first part of your conversation, but if you’ve been talking for a while and

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it doesn’t come up you might want to start questioning her level of interest.

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It’s even worse if you

ask her name and she doesn’t reciprocate

by asking yours.

This means that most likely she doesn’t want the conversation to get personal and that you’d be better off wrapping things up and moving on to somewhere else.

she quickly brings up her boyfriend.

Sometimes a girl will bring up her boy-friend later on in her conversation. Any-time a significant other comes up, it is not a good sign, but if she brings him up after you’ve already been flirting and talking, you may still have a chance. However, if she quickly brings him up, it’s because she’s trying to send you a non-sub-tle hint that says, “Hey, I have a boyfriend” or,

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“I want you to think I have a boyfriend so that you leave me alone.” Obviously, when you get this sign, it is time to move on.

W

hen you’re

out at a social event, you’re be-ing watched. So if a girl quickly rejects you or gives you the boy-friend excuse. Simply give her a high five, and say, “I bet he’s an awesome guy”… and then tell her you’ve got to get back to your friends. The reason for this is that all of the girls watch-ing will just assume you are friends with the girl

and will not realize you were just shot down.

she avoids eye contact.

If you’re trying to talk to a girl and she’s kind of looking away, it’s not a

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posi-signs a girl you just met is not into you

tive sign. You might recognize this same type of gaze in people who are try-ing to avoid a salesman at the mall. Obviously if you are in the same category as a salesman, it’s not good. She’s looking for an opening so that she can leave. If she avoids eye contact, it’s time to move on.

she has closed off body language.

This is the subtlest cue I’m going to mention. Many times, it is not obvious. Perhaps you get the feeling that she just doesn’t feel comfortable around you. This means that she probably isn’t. That doesn’t mean you can’t break through with a little more effort. Some girls just might be nervous or shy. But if you see this signal, you might want to start look-ing for other signs that she is not into you.

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she gives you short, one-word answers.

If she’s giving you short, one-word an-swers, that’s the complete opposite of trying to keep a conversation going. Brief answers usually mean she’s think-ing: “I want this to end so I’m making it as difficult as I can for you to continue.” The shorter the answers, the quick-er you should be looking for a chance to exit gracefully so that you can try to find flirtation somewhere else.

signs she

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_cock’tease

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she cuts off at the high points.

Some girls love attention, but have no interest in going any further than that. These girls will almost always cut

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she is too high energy.

The girls who are the loudest, highest energy girls are rarely the ones who are interested in you. They usually just want your attention to boost their own ego. off once the sexual tension mounts.

she’s too comfortable touching you too soon.

While later in the night a girl touching you is a great sign. If she’s too comfort-able right off the bat touching you it usu-ally means she views you as “non threat-ening” and has no sexual interest in you.

iMPoRTanT: Remember earlier we said attraction isn’t black or white. And part of getting good with girls is what we call “getting comfortable in the grey area.” This means you are comfortable with

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the fact that she might not be attract-ed to you YET… and you have the atti-tude that if I just show her a bit more of my personality she’ll come around. Rob and I have been teaching dating ad-vice for over 8 years. We have seen first hand that when a guy implements the right attraction building techniques he can “move the needle” very easily. However, you still MUST be aware of the signs.

As you get better with girls, and become more comfortable in the grey zone, you be-gin to use these signs as feedback on what you need to do to adjust your game, rath-er than signs that you should walk away.

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i

f you aren’t getting any readable

signs from a girl, you can do some things to try and evoke a readable response from her.

69 to actIvely

fInd oUt If

a gIrl Is

Into yoU

go in for a kiss.

This is an obvious one, but it can actual-ly be subtler than it seems. You can give a kind of light peck on the cheek or on the lips and just see how she responds. A lot of guys might not have the balls to do this during a first conversation, but, if you’re not sure where you stand, it is the most straightforward way to find out.

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6 ways to actively find out if a girl is into you

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When you go for the kiss, you’ll know. But be aware: even if she turns away or puts up a hand, it might NOT be a bad sign.

If she kind of turns her cheek but keeps talking and flirting with you, you're still all right.

If she turns away and gives you a clear indi-cation: “Hey, you got that totally wrong idea, I was just being nice to you,” then you’ve got a clear cut answer as well. If you don’t

want to wonder where you stand, a kiss is the way to go.

T

here have been quite a few times now that girls have rejected sev-eral of my attempts before finally allowing the interaction to move forward. Hell, I can think of one time the girl slapped me twice (playfully) before I wound up sleeping with her later that night...

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Even if she denies you again…as long as she still seems to be enjoying the interac-tion you can go for it again later in the night. Many times, even when a woman wants to kiss you, she has a clock in her head that determines when she’ll kiss you. And it isn’t until that clock goes off that she will accept your advance. In that case, just follow the two steps forward, one step back method of physical escalation.

Another extremely effective way to handle getting the cheek is to call out the elephant in the room.

This means that right after she gives you her cheek when you go for the kiss…simply say out loud: “She slipped me the cheek? Damn!” Or say something else that humorously ac-knowledges the fact she turned her cheek.

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I have a friend who was just telling me a story where a girl turned her cheek when he went for the kiss, and he said (in a Sein-feld-like- voice, almost doing self commentary), “That was a little awkward… totally wasn’t expecting her to give me the cheek.” He said she quickly played along doing her own commentary, “Yea… A little too fast… maybe if he seduced me a little bit more…” Two hours later he slept with her.

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make an offhand comment like, “we should hang out sometime.”

Make the comment and then see how she responds. You may not even have an actual plan for a date, but you can learn a lot from her response. A quick, “Oh, yeah, definitely,” is a very good sign. On the other hand, if she kind of ignores it, or acts weird when

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you say it, it means you probably haven’t built enough attraction and you’ve got to either continue building attraction or you’ve got to cut your losses and move on.

try the high five test.

Sometimes, I like to stop a conversa-tion and just say something like “Oh, you’re cool” and then give a girl a high five and grip her hand lightly. (Not in a creepy, weird way, just very lightly.) Then, I’ll see how long she lets her hand stays there. If she lets her hand linger in your hand, it means there’s some chemistry that she is feeling. If she pulls her hand back right away, it means there’s not enough attrac-tion there or she doesn’t feel

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take her hand and lead her somewhere.

One thing you can do is lead her somewhere by the hand. So if you’re at a bar or party. Say, “Come with me” and take her hand and lead her into another spot. You’ll notice how she reacts to you holding her hand. If she’s into you she’ll probably grip your hand a bit. And when you get to the destination she won’t pull away her hand right away.

make a joke about your wife and kids.

I sometimes do this: I’ll just say, “I gotta get back to my wife and kids” and then judge her reaction. If you say something like this and a girl really likes you, she’s going to say “WHAT! What do you mean your wife and kids?” Then you can say, “I’m just kidding.” She has shown that she is into you and that

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your comment caught her off guard. On the other hand, if you say “I’ve got get back to my wife and kids,” and you get no reaction out of her, then it probably wasn’t going as well as you thought it was.

ask personal Questions.

This is something you can use on a date, or when you go back to her place to see if she’s wants to sleep with you. The more personal question she’s willing to answer, the more likely she is to sleep with you. Rob’s personal favorite strategy is to ask her about her first kiss. After she’s answered that, the he’ll ask her ,“When did you lose your virginity?” He says that every single girl who’s answered that question he’s gone on to sleep with. If they won’t answer the question, it means you have to work a little bit more at creating attraction and comfort.

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sIgns a gIrl yoU

've knoWn

aWhIle

Is Into yoU

76 s

ome guys have been dating a girl for a little while and they don’t know what her interest level is. This is actually

one of the most common questions that I have gotten in my coaching career.

Or perhaps you are not even dating a girl, but you have exchanged numbers or met on a dat-ing site and you want to know if you should pursue a romantic relationship with her.

Here are the most common signs that a girl who you already know is into you...

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signs a girl you've known awhile is into you

77

she sends you random text messages.

If she is sending you messages out of the blue, it means she’s checking up on you and doesn’t want you to forget about her. This is her way of testing your level of interest. She wouldn’t be concerned about your level of interest if she weren’t interested herself.

she wants to introduce you to her friends.

If one of her friends is having a par-ty and she wants you to come and meet all her friends, it means she sees some sort of potential with you. She’s not go-ing to introduce you to her friends if she’s embarrassed by you or if she plans to end things with you soon thereafter.

she makes future plans with you.

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signs a girl you’ve known awhile is into you

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we’ve got to go here together” or “we gotta do this,” it’s a good sign. Even if it seems like an offhand comment (as opposed to a definitive date plan), it is still a good sign. It means she’s dream-ing about the future and you are in it. She wouldn’t be doing that if she were trying to find a reason to get rid of you.

she instigates intimacy.

If a girl starts kissing you and doing in-timate things without taking a cue from you, she has a high level of interest. Of course, this could also be a sign that you are not being intimate enough with her., which makes it a tough sign to interpret. However, if she gives you cues that are not overtly sexual (sitting close to you, hold-ing your hand, kisshold-ing you on the cheek), you can be pretty sure that she is into you.

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she always makes herself available.

When a girl is into you, she makes herself available no matter what. She will come over at 2:00 in the morning when she gets off work. She may even cancel plans she al-ready had. She’ll rearrange her social sched-ule so that she can hang out with you. Pay attention: she might not directly say, “I canceled my plans with my friends so that I could hang out with you.” However, if she men-tions some cancelled plans, she is giving you an opening to say, “Come hang out with me.”

she gets a

second wind.

Earlier, I talked about when you’re first seeing a girl and you’re really attracted to her how attraction gives you large re-serves of energy. If you’ve been dating for a while and you see that kind of energy in

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girl, it is a good sign. It means she’s still enjoying your company or she has gotten to know you more and is even more at-tracted than she was initially. If she wants to stay out late and then still has energy when she gets back to your place, things are probably going very well for you.

she continues to fix herself up when she knows she's going to be seeing you.

If every time she comes to hang out with you, she looks really good, it is a sign that she still has a high level of interest. It means she cares what you think about her. If she didn’t care, she would come over as is. If you see make-up and fresh clothes, and smell perfume, it’s a good indica-tion that you are still winning the game.

she is paying more

attention to you than others while at a social event.

If you go to a party together or a club where she knows lots of people and she’s

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stay-signs a girl you’ve known awhile is into you

81

ing with you and talking with you and not mingling with other people, it means she is definitely into you. She might stop by to say high to friends, but if she does this, she’ll either come back quickly or else call you over so that she can introduce you.

she spends time on you even When you’re not around.

One thing that is SUPER important is the fact that the attraction between two people should grow even when you’re not in each other’s company. If anything, it should become even stronger when the two of you aren’t to-gether! A pretty good sign she’s into you is when she knows you’re busy, but she texts or calls you anyway. She is communicating when you can’t re-spond and that’s a HUGE indicator that she’s got you on her mind. Whether she leaves

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a cute voicemail just to say hello or sends a text letting you know she’s thinking of you...you know for sure your girl is into you! In fact, as we talk about in this article, it is absolutely crucial that you’re on her mind when she’s not around you.

she stalks you on facebook.

These days, when a woman first meets a guy, the QUICKEST and easiest way to get to know him is by digging up dirt on Facebook or any other social media net-work. If she starts leaving you comments on older photos or posts, you’ll know for sure that she’s been stalking you a bit! But don’t worry, it’s in a good way =) She’s using your Facebook to find out more about you without com-ing on too strong or scarcom-ing you away.

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Just keep in mind that if she doesn’t send you a friend request, she might not actually be that interested.

she wants you to herself.

A woman will DEFINITELY make it known that you are hers if she’s really into you. If you are at a bar and she sees you talking to another girl, chances are that if she’s into you, she will interrupt the conversation faster than lightning. She will do everything in her pow-er to make sure evpow-ery othpow-er girl in the bar sees the two of you together. And to make things a little more known, she may even kiss your cheek and be extra touchy just to make sure YOU know she’s feeling it.

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84 decoding her texts

the ’bluff’ text.

Here is an innocent text you can send a girl that will quickly reveal what she feels about you. Simply send her: “TONIGHT?” What she responds to that one word text re-veals a lot. If she seems intrigued or press-es you for more information she definite-ly is into you. However, if she ignores that text or doesn’t press for more info, then she doesn’t have a strong desire to see you.

she adds ’excitement’ emoticons to texts.

If a girl responds simply with “lol” or “haha”… not good. But if she sends you etiher one of those followed my a lenghty response that’s a good sign. She’s trying to show you she’s excited to hear from you.

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You may also notice texts like “Heyyyyyy”, which is a lot better than, “Hey.”

timing of her texts.

If she is “erratic” with her responses it’s ususally not a good sign. But if she re-sponds right away or always waits five minutes before respoding it’s a good sign. Basically if she predictiably responds after 5 to 10 minutes every time she most likely is trying to “play the game” and make you wait.

’I’m a fun girl texts.

A girl who is into you is going to try to send you texts that portray her as cool, fun girl: “Going to the Yankees! Woohoo!” When a girl is trying to impress you over texts it’s a good sign. A girl who isn’t interested in you will make no effort to appear cool or fun.h

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sIgns a gIrl yoU

’ve knoWn

aWhIle

Is not Into yoU

o

f course, you have to keep an eye out for bad signs as well. These are the signs that she’s NOT into you. Remember, you have to keep the right frame of mind and accept the situation when

these signs start popping up.

If you’re seeing more than one of them, it is probably time to take a step back and

de-cide if it is time to cut your losses and leave or employ a new strategy (like the one laid out in Unlock Her Legs.)

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signs a girl you’ve known awhile is not into you

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she says she’s not ready for a relationship.

If a girl goes out of her way to stress that she’s not looking for a relationship, it means she’s not looking for a relationship with you. Even the most independent girl wouldn’t go out of her way to say that to a guy that she had any interest in. If she likes him, she is going to put herself in a po-sition to be as close to him as possible. If she mentions not wanting a boy-friend, it is a non-subtle cue that you are not in her future plans.

If you want to “re-spark” attraction we recommend using a move called “The Pull Back” Here is a short article explain-ing the move: Article on “The Pullback“

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she never calls you and avoids your calls.

I’ve dated girls who were really into me, but never called. However, when I called them, they answered on the first ring and were always available to hang out. They just had the idea that a guy should always be the one to call. However, this is not always the case. If a girl never calls you but then when you call her she doesn’t answer or she doesn’t call you back right away, it’s a bad sign. If you’re calling her and she’s unavail-able to even talk to you on the phone, it is definitely, definitely not a good sign. If this happens more than once, you’ll have to face the fact that she is not into you.

she texts you back one’ word answers.

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word answers like “lol” or “ha” she is ac-tively trying to get you to NOT text her. When a girl wants you to continue tex-ting her she’ll put effort in and try to en-gage you with a question or something to encourage you to continue texting.

she cancels plans and is always busy.

Like I said, if a girl likes you, she will come over your house at 2:00 a.m. after the bar or party or when she gets off work (if she works a late job) or she’ll stop by your house in the middle of the day if she doesn’t have time later on or even break plans with friends. If she’s canceling plans with you routinely, or if every time you ask her to hang out, she’s “busy,” you should be hearing warning bells in your head. Some girls are very busy, but, like I said, if they truly like you, they’ll make time.