Someone who has depression might be constantly saying to themselves that life is useless, not worth living. They will use these words in their
everyday speech as well, and in doing so they convey negative emotions just by speaking and can also make other people around them depressed just through their choice of words.
Someone who avoids social situations would tell themselves they are not the extroverted type and they can never compete with upbeat party people. They say this to themselves so convincingly that they do not even bother to go out and try.
through meditation and prayers affirming the beauty of life. In this instance I do not want you to dwell on your internal dialogue specifically but rather how the things you say to others can affect your own self-esteem and the way other people see you.
Constantly apologizing is one of the things that can keep you stuck in a mindset where you feel subservient and have the need to appease everyone you encounter for the fear that they will either physically or emotionally hurt you. The problem is people now use the term “sorry” for many social interactions which do not warrant an apology. There are other words which work just as well without making you feel you need to be apologetic for your actions.
In effect the goal is not so much for you to say sorry, excuse me or to apologize less when you are in the wrong but rather wait until someone has a legitimate grievance with you before you do. Spend a week not apologizing for normal everyday things such as moving past someone in a crowd, not having the right change for the newsagent or making a joke that was not exactly a crowd pleaser. Wait until people stop you and let you know there’s a problem, you will be pleasantly surprised at how often you do not need to say sorry.
Saying sorry does not make you weak but saying sorry too frequently for trivial things and when you genuinely do not feel you need to apologize will make you feel week and be perceived as weak. Also keep in mind that the more you use apologies for every-day occurrences and when they genuinely are not needed you reduce their potency for when they are really needed.
The idea of not saying sorry when you do not need to stems back to the idea that the whole reason behind this method of seduction is to disturb the norm; to differentiate yourself from what the average male does. The average male may tell a woman a joke that she does not find funny or says is stupid or offensive. He would apologize just on the off chance that he really did offend her even if he genuinely believes he was in the right. This can relate back to shit-tests, a lot of grievances people have are to get attention or create drama in their lives as it can give them something to do or complain about to their friends.
{attraction}
“A man can be short & dumpy & getting bald,
but if he has fire, women will like him...”
Mae West
Attraction
Have you ever wondered why men who have nothing going for them can attract hot women? (And no, drink spiking is not the correct answer) Have you ever seen a beautiful woman with an average looking guy? He may have been bald, losing his hair, short, fat with a third arm growing out of his forehead and strangely enough he is still able to have a smoking little bunny as a girlfriend or FB (friend with benefits).
This is because attraction is created in our minds by what society tells us is attractive. Take a look at any paintings done over 200 years ago. The women are, by contemporary standards, overweight, pasty and plain. No one now is attracted to that because society’s perceptions of what is attractive have changed. Ultimately “beauty” is a social construct which is subject to change. Regardless of your looks you can create attraction with the woman you are interested in (the target). Just as society tells us what is attractive we can concurrently reprogram women to see us as attractive, as attraction is purely mental.
A smooth talker will always trump a boring model. Demonstrate that you are of a higher value than other men, make efforts to differentiate yourself and no matter what you look like you can change how you are perceived. In other words, women will choose you over any other man if they perceive you have something they do not.
Value is something which is considered of high worth by another; it is subjective and differs from individual to individual. A valuable trait which is attractive to one person may not be as attractive to another; however there is a set of traits which are universally attractive to 98% of women worldwide. Strangely enough attraction is all about conveying the following traits subtly:
• Confidence • Creativity • Dominance • Humor • Intelligence • Leadership • Social skills • Survival Instincts
You can appear to have the trait by emulating someone who demonstrates it effectively. Acting does come into play and you will need to push yourself to say and act in ways you would not usually do. You will end up perfecting these traits depending on what you feel you can adapt to, and your increased success with women will affirm in your mind that you want these traits to become part of your personality. If you
appear dominant, people will perceive you as a dominant person and allow you to take charge and lead; the same is applicable with the rest of the traits. Your beliefs are contagious, if you think they will work then they will. I will help you work on convincing yourself of this further on as we will also discuss some tactics to help you manage low-confidence and anxiety.
A more simplistic exercise is to observe people who possess some of the above traits and take note of how they act and interact with others. How do others treat him?
Is he respected? Or charismatic?
Most importantly can you see yourself possessing these traits even if it means making a conscious effort to improve? The aim of this book is to change you for the better. You need to be able to recognize that the traits that make up “you” are either not working when it comes to seduction or they are masked by emotions such as fear or other insecurities.
Soe’s Tip: Being dominant in a group is attractive though a man must not lose track of the limits of this dominance when relating to the “target”. Taking initiative, and “telling”, rather than “asking” is dominant leader-like behavior which is a very attractive quality but he must not be pushy or bossy. If she says no to whatever he proposes, turn to another tactic and do not dwell on it or insist for too long.