The impact that we create when we influence depends not only on whether our words, tone and body language are congruent, but also the degree to which we are open about what we need, want, expect, feel and how much consideration we show to others for their feelings, thoughts and opinions.
There are four main styles of influence that we can use with others, as shown in Figure 15. 2.
The most effective form of influencing style is assertiveness. Yet being assertive is not an easy choice. Instinctively when we face a threatening situ-ation (as change can be), we adopt an emotional, approach which may be
Behaviour
Figure 15.1 Intention versus impact
Figure 15.2 Influencing styles
OPENLY AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOUR People display a lot of openness but give little consideration to others’ needs, thoughts or feelings. This behaviour may be described as domineering, pushy or self-centred.
PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOUR People display little openness or consideration for others’ rights. They find subtle ways to convey their thoughts or feelings to others. This behaviour is not direct and is often perceived as manipulative.
PASSIVE BEHAVIOUR People display little or no concern for own needs or feelings in an attempt to satisfy the needs and feelings of others. This behaviour breeds low self-esteem, frustration and withdrawal.
ASSERTIVE BEHAVIOUR People display openness and consideration for themselves and others. This behaviour allows individuals to communicate their thoughts and feelings in a way that does not violate the rights of others.
fight or flight (aggressive or passive). Assertiveness is a rational approach based on choice and is a learned behaviour.
In order to influence assertively you need to be able to say what you feel and think and need while at the same time respecting and valuing the views and opinions of others. There are two sets of influence behaviours that indi-viduals generally adopt at work as well as during change. These are called push behaviours and pull behaviours.
Push behaviours include:
• proposing – giving views and opinions, making proposals;
• directing – stating what you need and expect of others;
• evaluating – judging ideas and opinions given to you by others;
• incentivizing – providing incentives to do something or giving the consequences of not doing something.
People who use predominantly push behaviour work from their own agenda.
They can be viewed by others as ‘pushy’ or aggressive. Their language is very much centred on ‘I’ – eg ‘I want’ ‘I need’. The impact of their behaviour is that they signal that they want the other person to change.
Influencing others during change
Figure 15.3 Influencing style model
High
Low Concern for others High
Assertive
Aggressive Passive
Passive-aggressive
The consequence of too much ‘push’ can be that people on the receiving end become disenfranchised. They do not consider that their opinions are sought or valued. In extreme a push style can appear dictatorial. The result of this style of behaviour is that team members lose respect for their leader and become terrorists (see Chapter 14 and below).
A further extension of push behaviour is manipulation – using sarcasm, withdrawing from dialogue with the other person, demonstrating through body language and/or tone that you are not happy. This is a form of passive aggression, sometimes called concealed aggression. The impact of this behaviour is that people become victims during change. Nothing is explic-itly expressed, rather implied. An ‘atmosphere’ is created that is difficult to overcome.
Pull behaviours on the other hand focus more on the other person and involve:
• enquiring – asking questions to find out more from the person;
• listening and pacing – actively listening, summarizing. Matching the pace of the other person, going with their flow;
• being open to suggestions and ideas – being ready to admit mistakes, being open to other ways of doing things.
Rather than ‘I’, these behaviours focus on ‘You’ – the other person. They show an interest in and consideration for the individual. A further pull behaviour focuses on ‘We’: finding areas of agreement – building common ground, ‘Yes, and …’ rather than ‘Yes, but …’;
The impact of using a pull style of influence is to signal that you are prepared to change. You are working from the other person’s agenda.
However, if you adopt a predominantly pull style of influence all the time you may be perceived as ‘a push over’ or passive person. This style of influ-ence can lead to ‘yes men’ behaviour in others. Everything is very cosy but no action gets carried through.
Tony Campbell, former Deputy Chief Executive of Asda and now non-executive director for a number of different companies, is quoted in an article entitled ‘Board to death’ by Jane Simms, published in Director in December 2003 as saying: ‘I sometimes let rip on an issue and then have to rewind and reframe my comments in a way that elicits a thoughtful response. It’s the difference between telling the executives how to do some-thing, and helping them towards the right decision through persuasion and careful challenge.’
In order to influence effectively, therefore, change leaders need to adopt a style where both push and pull are given equal balance. It is particularly useful in conflict situations, with superiors or where you wish to gain buy-in, to use pull behaviours before push, eg use enquiry, listen and pace the other person. Equally in these situations it is important to be direct about one’s own views and opinions, for example:
• ‘What do you think about the proposed restructure?’ (Pull question).
• ‘So from what you’re saying you believe …’ (Listening and pacing – pull technique).
• ‘I agree that there has to be some leeway ….’ (Finding areas of agree-ment – pull technique).
• ‘The one area I need you to focus on is ..’ (Directing – push technique).
The same principles of push and pull apply to the style of leadership you adopt in introducing change.
Influencing others during change
Proposing
Directing
Enquiring Listening
&
pacing
Being open to suggestions
&
ideas Evaluation Incentivizing
Push
Pull
Finding out areas of agreement
Signals you want others to change
‘You’ their agenda ‘WE’
Own agenda ‘I’
Signal s you are pr
epared to change
Figure 15.5 Influencing framework
An illuminating case study of a pull approach to culture change was the group-centred approach implemented by CEO Gerhard Schulmeyer in the mid-1990s at Siemens Nixdorf. By securing full understanding and freedom among employees of each stage in the strategy, Schulmeyer accomplished in one quarter what would normally take a year.