1. Think of the image/perception you have of yourself and list the following on a sheet of paper:
• the first five or six words that spring to your mind;
Public arena
Known to you Unknown to you
Figure 19.1 Johari window
• an animal;
• a musical instrument;
• a type of food.
The words you listed are indicators of your self-image. By interpreting what those words mean you will gain greater clarity of your self-image. Now:
• Interpret the meaning of those words.
• Note on a sheet of paper the elements of your self-image that you believe are in your open area (ie known to you and known to others).
• Note on another sheet of paper the elements of your self-image that you believe are in your hidden area (ie known to you but not known to others).
Each of us behaves in ways designed to allow various aspects of our self-image (known to self) to be known to others – an open area. Likewise, we behave in ways to keep various aspects of our self-image in our hidden area (not known to others).
Write down examples of how you communicate these important elements of your open area. For example, if you feel you are confident and believe that people see you as confident, what do you do to communicate confi-dence?
Write down examples of how you behave to keep elements of your self-image (known to self) in the hidden area. For example, if you feel insecure, but try to project an image of confidence, how do you behave to ‘cover’ your feelings of insecurity?
The second part of this activity will not just increase your self-awareness but would also be helpful if you needed to increase your empathy and understanding of others:
• Find someone who would also be willing to undertake this activity.
• Ask this partner to complete the activity on you while you complete it on him or her.
• When you have both finished, share your observations with each other.
• Identify elements that you thought were in your open area but were not known to your partner (ie they were in your hidden area).
• Identify elements that you thought were in your hidden area but were known to others (ie they were in your open area).
• Identify any perceptions from your partner that were blind spots for you (ie you didn’t know about yourself).
2. When you next experience a strong positive or negative emotion, become aware of what is going on in your body physically:
How to increase your self-awareness
• Identify any tensions or marked feelings in any part of your body, eg in your stomach, jaw, shoulders, etc.
• Release that physical tension using a few deep breaths or movement in the body to relax it.
• List the circumstances or people that seem to trigger the emotions causing these tensions and why.
• Examine the activities in the following pages to help you identify the best way of dealing with the emotions that cause tension.
3. Identify someone you value who will both support and challenge you.
Then:
• Ask them for feedback about you as a leader.
• Ask them to complete the assessments in this book on you with specific examples to support their scoring.
• Ask them to complete a 360° feedback process if your organization works with this process already.
• Identify the top three strengths and areas for improvement that are most appropriate for you to increase your effectiveness as a change leader.
• Create an action plan to address these.
• Agree with the other person that you will complete this activity with each other every two months.
4. The purpose of this activity is to enable you to gain new insights and options involving situations which in the past left you feeling confused, fearful, stuck or frustrated. It allows you to communicate with impor-tant ‘advisers’ in your life, in order for you to create new alternatives for yourself in the future.
It is useful to create Figure 19.2 on the floor and stand in the appropri-ate mapped out positions. The physical movement will help you with this exercise. Think of a current problem or situation which is causing difficulty or that you would like to change in some way and then:
• Describe it briefly standing at point A.
• Step to point B and bring to mind three people who you value, and/or have shaped and influenced your life in a positive way.
• Step to point C. Go into role as your first adviser, and describe the current situation or problem from his or her perspective. Speak in the first person, as if you were that adviser. What do you see/hear/feel?
What insights and advice would you give about the current problem or situation?
• After the first adviser has finished, return to point B to check that the advice makes sense to you. If there is anything you do not understand from this perspective go back to point C and clarify.
• Step to point D. Take the role of your second adviser and describe the problem from this person’s perspective. Speak in the first person, as if you were that adviser. What do you see/hear/feel? What insights and advice would you give about the current problem situation?
• After the second adviser has finished, return to point B to check that the advice makes sense to you. If there is anything you do not understand from this perspective go back to point D and clarify.
• Step to point E. Take the role of your third adviser and describe the problem from that person’s perspective. Speak in the first person, as if you were that adviser. What do you see/hear/feel? What insights and advice would you give about the current problem situation?
• After the third adviser has finished, return to point B to check that the advice makes sense to you. If there is anything you do not understand from this perspective go back into point E and clarify.
• Once you have gathered clear information from all three advisers, go back to point B and identify the key themes and messages being communicated.
• When you have reflected on the common messages from your advisers, put yourself back into the actual problem you are experiencing by standing in point A and recalling it. Notice how your perception of the situation has changed.
• Use the messages from your advisers and imagine yourself in the problem situation in the future, notice the new options and resources that are available to you. Given that information, what are you going to do?
How to increase your self-awareness
Adviser 1 C
Adviser 2 D
Adviser 3 E
A B
Figure 19.2 Self-awareness activity