(starts @ 11:39)
Karate Chop: Even though he doesn’t approve of me…
…and I spend a lot of time worrying about that… …and I can tell that it clutters my vibration… …I deeply and profoundly accept who I am. Even though he doesn’t approve of me…
…and I’m the one who spends time worrying about it… …I accept who I am anyway.
…I deeply and profoundly accept who I am.
Eyebrow: I have this cluttered vibration.
Side of the eye: It’s cluttered with my fear of what he thinks of me. Under the eye: It’s cluttered with my fear of what she thinks of me. Under the nose: I’m so afraid of how they view me.
Chin: No wonder it’s hard to be clear.
Collarbone: No wonder it’s hard to be clear. Under the arm: I want to be clear.
Top of the head: I choose to release this clutter. Eyebrow: I love being clear.
Side of the eye: Maybe he doesn’t approve of me. Under the eye: Maybe she doesn’t approve of me. Under the nose: I don’t care anymore.
Chin: I’m doing the best I can.
Collarbone: I don’t need to fear their thoughts… Under the arm: …because I want to be clear…
Top of the head: …and I choose to be clear right now. Carol: Take a breath.
Rick: Ahhhhh… (deep breath) I love the way that you include the negative
aspect of not approving as well as positive movement toward “I really don’t care!” Even if that doesn’t feel completely true, if you shifted it from caring at 98% to caring at 70%, that will change everything. If you do it again and again, and it continues to go down to the point where “Why did I ever care what he thought?”
Carol: Right. And remember when we were talking and tapping about
overwhelm with stuff and feelings, people have that overwhelm feeling with clutter. It’s very hard to picture taking one corner, or now, what we’re talking about is taking one emotion or one event and clearing it. It’s critical to go piece by piece by piece. If you walk into a very cluttered, messy house or garage and try to do it all at once - you can’t do that. What
happens is you get overwhelmed and you go back to those feelings, and that clutters your vibration. We want to step through each part that might feel cluttered in your vibration, and get clearer and clearer and clearer. It may take some time.
Rick: I was helping my friend emptied out clutter from her garage. What
was interesting was that she had done a certain amount of work and got to a particular place, and then she needed a helping hand. When I brought my energy in, just for a short period of time, it helped to take care of some
things that would be difficult to do just by herself. Then, after I left, she filled up four, five, or six more contractor bags full of stuff. That was great. I think it’s also a paradigm that sometimes we can use a helping hand for certain aspects of it. Like you said, the clearing of the clutter - whether it’s emotional clutter or physical clutter - when your body or your mind or your spirit says, “We’re done for now,” see if you can move away from it, pat yourself on the back and say, “Yes. That was a great step in the direction of what I want.” Lots of times when people get started, they see the whole landscape of what might be required, and they’ll get some energy up, they’ll do some work, and then, when their body is saying ‘enough’, they’ll want to push forward and (quote) ‘finish the job’. On the physical side - when it’s physical stuff - that can really deplete you. When you’re getting guidance from your body that, “Hey, you’ve done enough,” your mind and your body have sorted enough, done enough, it’s time to stop and do a little
celebration. Pat yourself on the back. The same thing works emotionally. If you have five, six, seven specific events around a particular person and you take one of them, afterward you feel relief on that one event. You feel like you want to finish all of them and just get them out of the way, but you don’t really have the energy to do it, you’ll feel it. If you push forward at that point, chances are you won’t be as complete, especially using EFT. You’ll tend to skim over the important details, the more powerful energies, the more powerful emotions, you’ll skim over. So I encourage people to be listening. At each given point, ask your body and mind: “Is it okay to continue?”
Carol: Right. And trust that answer, because it’s not about ‘should’: “I
should do more.” “I should clean up one more corner.” As you say, people get burnt out, and it’s not good for them. It’s not as efficient. Do solid work. I’m somebody who does short spurts of EFT. I don’t sit down with myself and do an hour session. I never have. Somebody else might do half an hour every day on themselves, or forty-five minutes. I do these little bits. That works for my system. It’s not right or wrong. Get clear on what works for you. Whether you’re doing it with a partner or a peer or a buddy, what feels right to you in the amount of time that you spend and the amount of energy that shifts?
Rick: Exactly. I’ve noticed that, with clients, sometimes you’ll get small
shifts - from a 9 to an 8, or an 8 to a 7. You’ll do that for a couple of weeks if you’re working on your own. Then you’ll start shifting more significantly. That’s often because, as you build up the energy in your vibration, your energy gets used to the idea that it can bring things up and have them soothed and not overwhelm you, and allow you to continue on with the rest of the things that you have to do in your life. Now you have a working
collaboration going on. You can take on bigger things. Your body/mind/spirit knows that it can trust you.
Carol: Absolutely. I want to tell a brief story about someone who was
talking to me about their clutter. She had a friend visit for the weekend, and the friend is anxious and insecure and says so out loud. “I need to be liked,” she said. She attacked the clutter areas of the person who owns the house. The person who owns the house is my friend, and she said, “It’s not that I didn’t think it needed to be done. I’m not an idiot. I can see the piles. It’s terrible.” But she said, “It felt intrusive. It’s not the right timing for me. I’m not ready for it.” One of the things we have to do, if we are a cluttered person, is to set really clear boundaries with friends and family members who often are impatient and say, “Clean this up and do this,” or “What’s the matter with this pile?” You have to deal with that so that you can get energetically ready first before you do the actual work, if that’s the right direction to go. Again, she said, “I know it needed to be done, and it looks great…” but she was left with icky feelings. “Why did I let her do that? She was doing it for herself, and I’m glad I kept her busy, but ughhhh…” You must respect that in yourself.
Rick: How can we help people with EFT around situations like that? Who
hasn’t been pressured to clean up their physical stuff as well as their
emotional stuff by someone who ‘loves us and wants the best for us’ and is not on our timeline?