Seduction

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Seduction

Copyright © 2010

Mike Macgirvin

New South Wales, Australia

All Rights Reserved.

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Introduction

When I was a little over eight years old, my dad pulled me into his study and opened an encyclopaedia. On the page were pictures of human reproductive organs. I snickered slightly. I was about to get the birds and bees lecture; most of which I was already aware of from talking in the school yard. My dad dryly explained the mechanics involved. The penis goes into the

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vagina, sperm swim toward the egg, etc.

Several years later when I attempted to practise what he attempted to teach me that day, I found that he had left out some rather critical information. How the heck are you supposed to get the penis into the vagina in the first place? It's not as easy as it sounds. The vagina can be harder to get into than the cash vault at the Bellagio Casino. Sex seemed to come easy for some men, but I wasn't one of them. I was nerdy and shy. Smart but not athletic.

It wasn't totally bleak. Every few years I'd get lucky and have a brief opportunity to sow my wild oats with some real loser of a girlfriend. But she would always meet somebody else who seemed to have a mythical attractive quality and soon be gone. This familiar pattern repeated itself over and over for years. What did these other guys have that I didn't? I made it a goal to find out.

In fact this began a long process of discovery and personal growth. I learned a great deal – and found not only answers but amazing discoveries along the way. It literally changed my life. Now I'm going to share with you what I learned the hard way and teach you all about the fascinating world of seduction - how it

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works and how to make it work for you. I will tell you everything you need to know in order to surround yourself with attractive women that will bring you all the happiness, pleasure, and sexual opportunities that you desire.

It doesn't require money. It doesn't require good looks. Neither of these will hurt your chances, but there's a lot more to it than that. You can be a millionaire and not be able to get laid, as you can also be highly attractive but lack the confidence to make anything happen. You can be short, fat, and bald and living off food stamps and have women begging you to sleep with them. You only need to learn how.

You are about to embark on the greatest journey of your life. Seduction is a skill with a broad range of applications, not necessarily sexual (even though that might be your primary goal). You may wish to think of it instead as influence, and the person holding the skill may be said to be influential. I am about to teach you how to become influential, to become a leader. The kind of person that other people like to be around and spend time with. Having enjoyable sex with attractive women of quality any time you want is merely a side effect of this process.

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weren't born with the “right stuff” and/or have had little or no practical instruction in dating and seduction – so that they can find their way out of the awkward and frustrating loneliness of not being desirable, of not being able to figure out exactly why they consistently fail to connect, and feeling helpless to do anything about it.

The “dating process” that many of you have been taught and as we know it today – consisting of brilliant opening line, chit-chat, followed by dinner/movie, flowers, etc... doesn't work. It is hopelessly broken.

There are many dating and seduction guides available on the internet. The problem that most authors of these materials encounter is that what men really want is a foolproof script or opening line which will make any woman they meet want to have sex with them right now. If you can promise that, you're going to make a lot of money. So that's what many guides are geared towards – the quick and manipulative opener.

Instant seduction isn't a complete myth, but it also isn't foolproof. What works in one situation or for one individual may not work in the next. So-called “foolproof” scripts and techniques quickly become obsolete because [surprise!] girls read this stuff

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too. I know – I've tried all the techniques. I will tell you the basic theory of many of these “instant” approaches, and you can use this knowledge and try your luck. But always remember that luck is fickle and unreliable. I'm here to teach you seduction from the inside out. You'll have an edge on all of the script kiddies because you will be much more versatile than they. Those that have been practising seduction for many years don't play this childish instant fuck game any more. Look beyond it. It's a huge waste of time and resources. Think about what you would be doing if you no longer had to worry about getting laid. Think about how your interactions with people in general would improve if you could take your mind off how to use them to obtain sex.

The truth is; at least on the short term you're going to have to work hard - and often improvise. I'm not going to sugar coat it. I'm also not going to send you out in the world with a bunch of scripts that may or may not work tomorrow. You can see guys down at the local pub reciting some instant pick-up drivel they picked up on the internet and then are shocked and stupefied when the girl doesn't go home with them. They've become mindless robots. (What's worse is when it even sounds recited.) The methods presented here are tried and proven. I intend to

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send you out into the world with the knowledge you need to succeed. It's your job to adapt this knowledge to your own

situation in order to use it effectively. The saying goes that to give a man a fish will feed him for a day – but to teach a man to fish will feed him for a lifetime. My goal is to teach you to fish.

The fine print in most all of the popular seduction guides is that all these clever techniques really only work once you

improve your so-called inner game, which is the persona you project to the world - and which is either summarised in a very brief chapter or covered in depth in yet another additional course you have to buy. The thing is - once you've got inner game, you could very likely walk up to a hot babe and blow soap bubbles in her face and get her to have sex with you. (Hmmm. These guys make a lot of money selling their patented pick-up techniques. Perhaps next month I'll create and market the “Ultimate Soap Bubble Seduction Method”. Don't laugh - try it.)

But I digress. We're going to concentrate mostly on that persona you project to the world. It's no game. It's who you are. It's the first thing people think when they look at you. Forget everything you think you know about dating and relationships. If you're doing it the way you learned in high school, you've got it all

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wrong - and it won't work. We're going to start over from the beginning - and do it right this time. Be prepared to challenge all your existing beliefs and learn new things and begin a long process of change – for the better. These changes will be seen as making you more attractive and interesting. And being

attractive and interesting is how you get women to take notice of you – and ultimately how you get laid. Along the way we'll cover some of the tools and tricks of the trade which you can use to enhance your natural abilities if you're just starting out, though you'll get much further over time with natural ability than you will with tricks.

This particular book is arranged into two parts. The first part is mostly to provide you the background information you will need in order to understand the fundamentals of human

interactions; and also provide a glimpse of what is necessary for you to do in order to have a more powerful influence on those interactions. The second part will tell you how to do it. I know you are probably impatient and want to get started right away and hopefully get laid tonight, but please do not skip the first part.

All will become obvious as you read and learn. Mike Macgirvin – New South Wales, Australia

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Part I

The Animal Kingdom

We are all part of the animal kingdom, and owe a great deal of our behaviour to evolution and genetics. Before we begin the process of transformation into a seductive person, it would help to know a little background about how we as humans operate and interact at a fundamental level, both socially and

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sexually. What exactly is attraction and how does it work? If you look at the workings of the brain, you will find that some of our behaviours have evolved over thousands or millions of years in order to adapt to our changing environment, and some of those behaviour patterns are still with us from our primordial roots, while others are a direct result of a long tradition of banding together in hunter-gatherer societies. These behaviours influence us every day and to ignore them will doom you to failure in any social situation.

Attraction

Attraction is a process whereby a person feels closer or in fact moves closer to another, in terms of either emotional or physical distance (or both). The reduction of distance is usually triggered by some sense of perceived benefit to the person. Attraction can be considered mutual if it involves two (or more) people who have arrived at the same conclusion of perceived benefit and have indicated this by reciprocal action.

This benefit may be access to additional resources for the person, or it may provide additional opportunity (such as to obtain sex), or it may involve the satisfaction of a social or non-material

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need such as companionship.

Mutual attraction leading to increased closeness over time is known as a relationship.

Physicists are likely to state unequivocally that opposites attract (based on the magnetic principle). This is probably true. It has close analogues in sexual attraction (males and females are considered opposites in this sense). But social attraction is a bit more complicated. It's still based on opposites – as one person has what the other person does not have. However social attraction is usually built on a foundation of commonality and rapport which acts like a kind of glue to make the fundamental attraction even more sticky. So to really get along, forget about being complete opposites, as some people seem to treat this as a goal. That's ridiculous. You need to have things in common, and the more the merrier.

Sexual relationships among humans are most successful when they include both the biological sexual attraction as well as a high degree of social attraction, as the multiple levels of mutual need fulfilment may result in physical closeness (and perhaps repeated matings) over a long period of time. This is known as a

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Attraction also has biological consequences. The human body releases endorphins when you are near the person you are attracted to. These make you feel good. When the person is distant, the lack of endorphins makes you feel sad or depressed. In this sense, attraction is or can become very similar to a drug dependency. Most people want to feel good - so they will continue to return to the subject of their attraction.

The Mating Ritual

The mating ritual amongst humans varies little from most other animal species. Sociologists tend to use the term

“resources” a lot when describing these behaviours. Mating at its core involves the process of reproduction (regardless of how enjoyable it is). In the human species, the female carries the entire risk of pregnancy, and also the burden of raising offspring and struggling to keep them alive until adulthood. These activities require a lot of resources. The male on the other hand only

provides his genetic material in the form of sperm, and nothing else is holding him to the act of parenting (other than his own volition). Since they are the most heavily invested in terms of resources, females have evolved to be the gender that controls selectivity of mating. It is their choice who they have sex with.

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Period.

The way the mating process works is not much different from thousands of other species, and hasn't changed appreciably in millions of years. It begins with the male presenting the male

display. In some species, he dances or collects objects, has the

biggest schlong, or perhaps the most colourful tail. Whatever. He needs to present himself unequivocally as the best sex partner.

The female then evaluates these displays and compares the males for their genetic and/or parenting qualities, and if she finds one of them acceptable - responds with a signal of interest, followed by a submissive gesture as if to say “Hi, big guy – I'm waiting for you...”. These subtle signals tell the male that he is allowed to approach and begin the act of courtship, which will often (but not always) lead to copulation (sex). If she does not find him acceptable, she will look away; and he will have to go present his display somewhere else.

Many species copulate only during estrus, or the most fertile point of the ovulation cycle (they are said to be “in heat”). In humans, this point of the cycle isn't always advertised through appropriate signals to the other sex, and therefore copulation can and does take place most any time. The end result is all that

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matters to us at the moment – humans can and do have sex whenever it suits them to do so; and their mating behaviour and bodies have evolved to a stage where the act of sex is enjoyable in its own rite, rather than purely as a means to reproduce. However; and this is important – reproduction is the primary goal. The genetic adaptation to having sex any time (and the fact that it is so enjoyable) is apparently the result of a biological arms race over rampant adultery in our ancestors. I would refer those interested in exploring this fascinating topic in depth to read “The Red Queen” by Matt Ridley.

The female is the selective partner, but at least in humans, the male is considered the dominant and aggressive partner once courtship has begun. He is the seducer. It is his function to

approach and initiate physical contact, and to take the lead in all of the mechanics of mating, which involve touching, kissing, petting, and finally penetration and intercourse.

Another important aspect to consider about sex within humans is the evolution of higher intelligence and the addition of what we call “game” into the ritual. We are constantly bombarded by sexual symbolism and messages from the world around us. Competition is fierce. Adultery is rampant. So after the initial

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mutual indication of interest, one or both partners will often initiate an attraction loop in order to heighten the attractive force and increase the chances of long-term bonding. The attraction loop is a process of subtle manipulation wherein attraction is withheld by one partner briefly. This causes the other partner to feel a loss and devote resources to restoring it - by increasing their interest to overcome the loss.

This allows one partner some element of control over the other by regulating the supply of attraction endorphins. In

essence this creates a drug dependency in the other partner as well as a heightened level of attraction. The more one works towards a particular goal, the more one is invested in that goal through resources, and the more of their mental frames

incorporate that particular goal. Their mind is slowly being taken over.

Within the brains and bodies of the participants, a great many changes are happening as the mating process unfolds. Many of these biological processes are extremely subtle and are acting on the subconscious minds of those involved. Hormones and chemical signals are being exchanged. Body language is being exchanged. You may not be aware of it, but inside your

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brains a lengthy and complex conversation is taking place completely without words.

Hopefully you learned all of this in high school biology class, but I'm going over it for a reason. Humans think that they are acting with conscious oversight and making rational choices in their lives, but quite often they are deceiving themselves. They are instinctively hard-wired to act certain ways in certain

circumstances. There are some behaviour patterns which are not the result of conscious choice and which we have no control over. Don't fret. A little later I'll discuss several aspects of the mating process where you can elicit elements of choice and control.

Fundamental to this discussion is that males and females have different patterns of needs and desires, and that their minds are therefore programmed differently. I'm also assuming that the person reading this book is a male, and doesn't have any major issues understanding or relating to other males; which we will therefore cover only briefly. Adjust your expectations accordingly. You cannot approach the act of persuading, influencing, or seducing a female without being able to understand her perspective and how her brain works at a fundamental level.

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Body Language

Another aspect of human evolution worth noting is that rich oral communications are relatively recent developments in

evolutionary history. These signals which I mentioned during the mating ritual go back millions of years and are the fundamental process by which humans communicate in mating situations, and in fact in all social situations. It is the language of the body - eye movements, muscle twitches, gestures, smell, and vectors (e.g. which way you lean or your fingers or feet are pointing).

Your aspirations, fears, all your emotions - are written all over your face and body and can be read clearly by anybody willing to learn the language. I will try to cover the essentials which you need to know, but I heartily encourage the reader to educate themselves on this subject in depth, because mastering this form of communication is absolutely critical in order to progress in influential ability. Check Amazon.com or your local bookseller for comprehensive books on the subject.

The first and most important thing to know is that women have evolved in such a way as to be naturally very proficient at reading body language. Men have not. This is the result of generations of women being the choosing partner in sexual

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interactions. Remember, it takes lots of resources for her to bear and raise children. She must be able to spot a male who isn't what he claims to be – a willing and reliable father with the right genetic mix to pass to her children. Her brain is processing every move you make, every subtle change of facial expressions, the way you hold yourself. And she is really, really good at it.

The next thing you need to know is that humans (even males) take stock of all new people that they come into contact with, reading the body cues they send out. This is to weed out dangerous people. In less than a second and definitely within 30 seconds of initiating contact, your brain has analysed and

pigeon-holed this new person into what type of person they are – trustworthy or flake, friend or foe, somewhat like you or

completely different. This evaluation may continue to be refined for about 3-4 minutes as new information is made available, but the fundamental decisions were made in the first few seconds, and that initial perception will ultimately define the entire

relationship you will have with this person. In a matter of

seconds, women have already sized you up and decided whether they will ever consider having sex with you, or whether you're just going to be a friend, or whether you're just a jerk that they should

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avoid at all costs. This is very important! Once you've been categorised, your chances of getting into another category are slim, and in most cases next to impossible.

They key signals for determining if somebody finds you attractive are:

– an open posture, arms not crossed – leaning towards (not away from) you – looking directly at you

– preening or touching hair – feet pointed toward you – dilated pupils

– licking lips

– any form of casual touch of your body – caressing their own body in subtle ways

– Women may tend to exaggerate their bust line by thrusting their breasts forward or “framing them for display” using their arms or natural objects. They also tend to highlight their waistline through posture, and

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noticeably display their wrist as a submissive gesture. – How a woman displays her lips can be a very potent

sexual indicator. Puffy, pouty, engorged with blood, and slightly parted can be a blatant indicator of exactly what is happening with her “other” lips (the labias), which tend to react in unison to sexual stimuli. Some of these signals can be faked and/or might be accidental movements, but if you encounter several of these in rapid succession, chances are pretty good that the person likes you. Consequently, if the person is leaning away from you with arms crossed tightly in front of them and avoids looking you in the eye – you aren't making a very good impression and you might want to focus your energy elsewhere.

Chemical signals are the most subtle cues of the lot. It is very difficult to counterfeit these and almost impossible to consciously read them. They act primarily on the subconscious minds of those around us. Fear and apprehension can be

detected completely by odour. There are currently products being tested which reportedly can weed out terrorists or smugglers in an airport based on this chemical fear indication.

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known as “pheromones” and are manufactured by your body specifically for the role of signalling your sexual availability. Your chemical structure and odour will vary in subtle ways depending on how recently you've had intercourse, how recently you've had non-copulatory sex (masturbation), and your levels of

pheromones will also be affected by physical proximity to attractive and virile members of the opposite sex (as a sexual enhancer) – as well as your own offspring (as a sexual detractor).

The mating ritual and first sexual encounter between two people throws their brain literally into a chemical stew of

hormones and bonding chemicals and attraction chemicals. The list is enormous. This is the clinical definition of afterglow and in fact the basis of love itself – a chemical imbalance caused by the rapid release of numerous hormones leading to unpredictable and perhaps silly behaviour. After a few days/weeks of the relationship this stew dies down and is primarily driven by oxytocin, which is a long-term bonding and trust hormone. Eventually this also fades and the chemical balance slowly returns to normal.

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The Alpha Male

Human societies evolved from small hunter-gatherer tribes of 8-30 people who banded together and lived a cooperative existence to ensure the survival of their communities. Like may other species which aggregate in bands or packs, there is always an alpha male – or the dominant male of the group. The

dominant male is the natural leader and decides where the tribe is going and as the most powerful member of the community is always the first choice of females as a long term mating partner. This is because he is proven to be the most resourceful of the males in the group, so raising children with him will provide the highest chance of survival of offspring. He has more resources available to him and more choice in all that he does. This affords him power, or the ability to coerce others to do things for him.

Other males in the group are known as beta males and are in constant competition for any females that the alpha rejects for some reason. There is a defined pecking order, and those at the bottom of the ladder have progressively fewer choices, fewer resources, and fewer mating opportunities. Depending on the culture, it is not unusual for those at the extreme bottom of the ladder to have zero mating opportunities.

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In many of the lesser technologically developed human societies, polygamy is still practised and the alpha male not only has the most wives, but also the most goats. In the industrial world where polygamy has been outlawed, the alpha male often wields the same power, but you will find him instead with the most money and the most girlfriends/mistresses.

An alpha male is noticeably different both in body

language and in appearance than the typical male of the species. Women are able to cue into these differences quickly. Other males (and females) have learned to adopt submissive

behaviours in his presence while the alpha clearly shows signs of being dominant or in control. Some of these signals involve:

– freely taking up space – outgoing and trusting – being attentive

– not seeking approval – head up, shoulders back

– eyes focused clearly, not darting or shifting about

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(both material and social) can become a part of their male display. Nice clothes, hot car, etc.

Humans are still primarily tribal. Look around your workplace or social groups, and you'll see what tribes exist and who holds the alpha role. This will be the decision maker that everybody else looks to for approval. These tribes also can be quite dynamic. Tribes may exist for an hour or two and break apart. Wherever people congregate, they instinctively look for and choose a leader, though hardly anybody is aware on a physical level that this actually happening. It mostly takes place through body language and subconscious communication.

Your challenge is to become that leader, because this is how you get what you want. Fortunately, for those who are not able to become an alpha male within their own tribe, they are often able to break away and form a new tribe – and assume leadership of it. These males still may have the problem of attracting females into their tribe, but I'm mentioning this to show that all is not lost if you weren't born into a high status role in your current tribe.

Another way to increase your status is to become more of a leader, so as to move up the ladder in the pecking order. Most

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alpha males have a teacher's pet or favourite beta male who is second in command of the tribe. While this person doesn't enjoy the full status of being the alpha male, sometimes he is able to enjoy many of the benefits of being the second choice, which is much better than being at the bottom and getting nothing at all; and also frees him from the need to make tough decisions for the tribe.

To do this, the person needs only to suck up to and show approval for the alpha male and help guard him from attack by other betas. The alpha will almost always reciprocally protect him and assist him in obtaining additional resources. This is because the alpha needs somebody in a lower position in order for him to be superior. This is called social proof.

Social Proof

A dominant or alpha male's status is expressed and confirmed by the actions of those around him through a primal ritual we call social proof, which is essentially peer pressure expressed almost completely with body language. It may be possible to mimic an alpha male and many men do this

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deceit because they lack social proof.

How does social proof work? Let's say that Bob is the alpha male in his tribe. Jack is in the tribe. When Bob and Jack are together, Jack sits defensively, with arms crossed, and when he makes a statement, looks towards Bob for approval of what he is saying. So does Bill, and so does Henry, and so does Mary. By their body language, all of those present in this situation have voted for Bob as the leader and the alpha or dominant male of this tribe.

If an even more powerful male enters the room (let's say his name is Tom), all eyes will be on Bob. He is their leader. If Bob should assume a submissive stance with Tom, Tom will now become the dominant male of the group and everybody else will shift their loyalty accordingly – at least as long as Tom is in the room. When Tom leaves the room, the “crown” will revert back to Bob. If Bob does not submit to Tom's authority, the tribe will usually remain loyal to Bob. Tom in this case might be more powerful in theory, but he has no social proof within this room with which to justify his power, so he is now just a visitor in Bob's tribe, and Bob still has all the power. Note that a mutiny can occur if Bob does not submit to Tom, but the rest of his tribe does.

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This is an interesting situation - where Bob could ultimately lose control completely.

Taking over an alpha role covertly can be accomplished by working yourself into a teacher's pet role, and then attacking the existing alpha in a way that ridicules him publicly in front of the tribe, while maintaining your own calm alpha demeanour. This puts him on the defensive, and the other members of the tribe will be subconsciously questioning their loyalty – just as if another alpha walked into the room. Then immediately assume the alpha role during the ensuing power vacuum and follow quickly by performing the leader duties for the tribe.

Warning – this is a very advanced technique which is going to fail and harm you irreparably in the tribe if you don't show all the other characteristics of alpha behaviour (e.g. you're just faking it) as you will lose the battle for social proof and the old alpha will be reinstated. You will definitely lose your teacher's pet role and may also be banished from the tribe should you fail.

Some alphas may also become quite violent if their power is threatened. Always remember that challenging an alpha male in some species and even some human tribes can result in death. You don't want to even consider this without careful

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planning and preparation. It is much better to take over a particular tribe by creating your own new cool tribe and assimilating the competition.

Most of the time you can simply ignore an intruding alpha male. Don't be rude or impolite, just carry on as if he is irrelevant.

The social proof ritual amongst overlapping tribes tends to become a hierarchy, so even the term “alpha male” is vague because it is within a particular tribe or social context. Females in this case will tend to notice every alpha male as they watch alpha power exchanges take place, but will be more attracted to those which show that they have higher status by possessing the ability and social proof to quietly take over adjoining or

overlapping tribes (without a fight). The males with the widest influence have more power, and hence more value as sexual partners.

Outside of the “range” of direct body language communication, social proof is expressed verbally amongst different tribes. You will already know this means of social proof expression by the name “reputation”. A person's reputation spreads their social proof far and wide. It is also a key element in building trust, which is also a key element in building sexual

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attraction. A reputation of leadership and respect to others has positive long term consequences with their sexual desirability – and this reputation of desirability can spread virally amongst large groups of people. Negative reputations can also spread to other tribes, and dminish one's social proof before they ever approach a particular tribe. Be aware of this.

Female Sexual Strategy

I'm not going to go too much in depth on understanding the mating strategy of human males, because I assume the reader already has a pretty good idea of how they determine sexual attraction. Men are very simple creatures sexually. We can probably say for the record that they generally seek out the prettiest girl they can find, and then hit on her relentlessly until she either succumbs to their charm or blows him off completely. They will do this for every pretty girl they meet, until they succeed at having sex. If they succeed at any point along the way (for instance if the girl gives them a smile at some stage or mentions that she's not seeing anybody), they will stick to her like glue, worship her as a goddess, declare their undying love, ask her out to expensive restaurants, and offer to buy her stuff.

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Unfortunately this hardly ever achieves the desired results. We'll get to that later. The point to remember is that males

generally are motivated to seek and place high value on physical beauty (genetic superiority) . That is, they are primarily seeking somebody that rates high on the ten scale. A woman's

resources, intelligence, and social status are often considered - but their effect on sexual desirability is often negligible. They may affect whether or not a guy thinks about sticking around after he shags her, but his immediate and primary goal is to have sex with her. Period.

Low status beta males who have been shut out from

sexual opportunity will often ignore beauty and take anything they can get, which often isn't very much because of a combination of their low status and by their resulting desperation – which

becomes obvious in their body language. Their resulting actions and behaviours are coloured by these factors and this becomes a vicious circle that can spiral out of control and reduce mating opportunities even further.

I know this scientific and anthropological stuff is probably boring you to death, but bear with me. I promise it's going to get more interesting.

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The female mating strategy is a bit more complicated. Evolution has saddled her with several conflicts which need to be resolved somehow.

The first conflict is that sex is physically enjoyable to humans – both male and female. Contrary to what some of you may have come to believe after failing at the dating scene for months or years at a time, women really, really enjoy having sex. Their bodies contain what is possibly the only physical organ known in the animal kingdom for which the sole purpose is to provide pleasurable feelings – the clitoris. But having sex can come at quite a price for a woman. She can get pregnant, which requires a long term commitment of her time and resources.

She can also have the negative social stigma of being called a slut, which affects her social rank with other females - and as a consequence might limit her opportunities within the tribe. It can also affect her ability to mate with choosy males as it (slightly) reduces her apparent value. So she is going to be very careful of expressing the fact that deep inside she wants to have sex just as much as you do – maybe more. Don't think for a minute that the fact that she has many more sexual pleasure nerves than you do is purely statistical or meaningless.

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The second conflict is about genetics. Put quite simply, her brain is looking for the best genetic qualities of all the males she encounters, so that her offspring have extraordinary good looks and ability, which will give an edge to future generations in their success at mating.

But there's a problem. The best looking males are highly sought by other women, and those males know it – because women will jump in the sack with them any time, any place; and without any strings attached. They will cheat on their husband of ten years for a shot at getting this genetic material for their offspring. You probably aren't that guy or you'd be in sexual bliss right now and wouldn't be reading this.

Anyway, the important thing is that these guys aren't the kind of guys that are going to stick around and raise kids. They're going to be out screwing every woman they can, every chance they get – because it's so easy for them to do so. Wouldn't you? The problem is that this isn't exactly conducive to raising children for a couple of decades.

So women are also programmed to seek out long term husbands, providers, protectors. This is where the alpha male comes in. He's the best situated to provide for a family over the

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long haul. He possesses stability, leadership, and has access to more resources than the rest of the tribe.

So how does a woman resolve this conflict? Only rarely is the alpha male also the most genetically endowed. I'm glad you asked... In fact she is hard-wired to be attracted to genetically superior males (e.g. those that are ten on the ten scale) during ovulation, and at all other times to seek the protector or alpha male. This provides the best of both worlds. She gets the best genes from the genetically superior dude in a short term fling, and then the provider steps in to raise the kids as part of a long term strategy. (He doesn't ever know for certain who the real father is.)

Clever huh? Remember, this is hard-wired behaviour. She can make other conscious choices, but beneath the surface this is how her brain is programmed to work. DNA testing has

revealed that in many urban areas, the married father is not related to “his” kids up to 20% of the time – and he is none the wiser.

This also helps explain why it is so difficult to talk most women into a quick fling. Her fling mode is to get the best genetic material. The rest of the time she's looking for a long-term

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provider. If you want to have a quick fling with her, you usually need to be a solid ten on the ten scale.

There are limited exceptions. One possible exception is if she is on vacation alone; far from home, and either uses birth control or is outside the ovulation window. This removes both the fear of pregnancy and damage to her reputation, and she might just let her hair down and have a romp with a strange man who doesn't conform to either her short-term or long-term mating strategy.

Another exception is that she might use a “casual romance” to inflict feelings of jealousy on a former lover. Be careful in this situation because in order for him to feel jealousy, she has to parade you in front of him – and she still has strong feelings about this person. This puts you right in the centre of a very emotional charged situation.

There's one other way to bypass her entire genetic reproduction programming and get her to have sex. Maybe you know the old Cindi Lauper song “Girls Just Wanna' Have Fun”. Women talk. Women who know a man that has rocked them to their core can't help but tell their girlfriends. Somebody who is a master of sexual technique that can bring them to climax over

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and over and over (and over) again. It's such a rare occurrence that it's like he's a super being and she wants everybody to know that she's in sexual bliss - from having her pleasure circuits overloaded.

Every girl wants a piece of that – and they'll go out of their way to get it. This referral has to be made by a woman, as every guy is going to claim that he can do this. Most can't. (I'll tell you how a bit later.)

The protector is sometimes a special case in the female long-term mating strategy. Those females that feel especially vulnerable or have suffered heavy emotional/physical abuse in the past will often seek out physical strength and the ability to intimidate other males as the primary criterion for choosing a mate. Should you approach one of these women but not possess the requisite body strength and protection ability that she seeks, your chances of having sex with her are slim.

Cleverness

Throughout human history, many women have also

succumbed occasionally to the clever male who did not otherwise fit into her overall mating strategy. This is a bit of a game of

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chance but worthy of mention. On the surface it would seem that she has been tricked, and either failed to catch or ignored the subterfuge. But in evolutionary terms, biology favours traits that will lead to ease of obtaining sex for the next generation. Social power and its associated status and safety, a stable home environment, genetic superiority – all of these make it easier for your kids to grow up intact and have sex more often. But also is the ability to use their brain and mental abilities to obtain sex, and perhaps this ability can be inherited.

Many of the more popular internet seduction techniques are based on cleverness as the primary means to an end. The ability to exploit this trait requires a very intelligent person who ignores the rules. A bit of a rebel that's very smart and usually very funny. The fact that people tend to like a person who makes them laugh a lot is often used in this case as an exploit to bypass many of her traditional defences - and quickly build both trust and attraction. Subtle manipulation is then used to close the deal.

The Sex Scale

Whereas men are ideally looking for somebody who is eight or above on the ten scale, women's primary interest in the

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ten scale is only to seek out a solid ten. Nothing else will do.

That's her genetic squeeze.

However; to rate alpha males for desirability as long-term partners, she needs to use a different rating method than one which is based solely on physical beauty. She also needs to consider their social status and power. We'll call this the social

scale. Those at the top are influential leaders - those at the

bottom, shy and insecure. Then there is also the cleverness

credit which may play a role in her evaluation. She needs to

consider all three influences - the ten scale , the social scale, and the cleverness credit.

Her rating of a male as potential sex partner therefore is based on a combination of these three rankings. This is her sex

scale. As both the ten scale and social scale are relatively equal

weighted to most females, we can use a a simple average of the two to come up with a sex scale value.

The cleverness credit is a special case of all or nothing. If the male is extremely clever and novel at convincing her to have sex, it provides him essentially a free pass; much like a free pass to a movie. Otherwise, it is irrelevant and his sex scale value will remain the primary means of evaluating his sexual attractiveness.

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By “extremely clever” we mean that the approach was effective in creating instant feelings of attraction and also highly original. Therefore it can't easily be scripted (though that has never stopped people from trying to come up with a magic line or foolproof pick-up technique/formula).

Due to the power that the cleverness credit holds, it draws lots of men to give it a try – including the not-so-clever and unoriginal. However, if such a technique is ever found to be essentially foolproof, it achieves legendary status and quickly makes the rounds; becomes widely known, and consequently loses its effectiveness rapidly thereafter.

Men use a sex scale as well, but it is calibrated a bit

differently and is mostly biased towards the ten scale. A woman's high ranking on the social scale might affect her overall rating by one point at most. If she's rated eight on the ten scale, but rich or smart or socially adept - she might get bumped up to a nine on the sex scale. If she's really shy she might get bumped down to a seven. A woman's cleverness is rarely considered to be relevant to sexual attraction.

We can easily describe women who are over eight on the

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highly symmetrical, they have a waist-to-hip ratio of

approximately 0.7, they have a medium build, and they are of child-bearing age. They have medium sized breasts (neither too large nor too small, though larger is more popular than smaller). Add or subtract one from the ten scale rating based on whether her social scale rating is above or below the mid-point (five) to ascertain her rating on the sex scale. If the result is eight or above, she's an alpha female.

Now let's examine the process for rating men for their sexual desirability. Once again, we first take the ten scale rank. Also just like we saw for rating females, symmetrical features win over everything else. But for men, body shape is evaluated a bit differently. Broad shoulders tapering down to a slim waist in a V shape is desirable. A shoulder-to-waist ratio of 1.6 is ideal, combined with a waist-to-hip ratio of approximately 0.8. Taller is better.

Next rate them on the social scale for overall charisma and power. Those that have leadership ability and a wide circle of friends/associates will rate at the top. Shyness and insecurity will come in at the bottom. Now take the ten scale rating and the social scale rating – and average them to produce a rating on the

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sex scale. A rating of eight or above is highly sought by women.

We will ignore the cleverness credit for the rest of this discussion – it is more of a free pass to have sex which we will discuss in detail elsewhere.

What happens if your rating is less than ideal on the sex

scale? What are your options? Fortunately, there's a bit more to it

than just getting top placement. Those that are eight or above are usually secure in the fact that they are desirable as sex partners by most people of the opposite sex. They can get laid with very little effort. So can the extremely clever - though the requirement for consistent originality and brilliance makes it less reliable.

But we also tend to seek out those who rate approximately

the same as we do, and in fact the vast majority of sexual activity

in humans takes place between people who are roughly compatible on the sex scale. The reason for this is due to our social value system (which affects our social scale rating, and therefore our sex scale rating). While we always value those who rate higher than ourselves, their value will be diminished by hooking up with somebody of lesser value.

This is known as the Beauty and the Beast Syndrome. If a woman who is a ten hooks up with a man that is a one (extreme

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example); her apparent value will be lowered. The social perception is that since she is willing to mate with somebody inferior to herself, there must be something wrong with her – which wasn't obvious. There has to be a reason that somebody violated the laws of mating behaviour and mated with somebody that's so different to themselves that they're seen as being a completely different species. The man (the beast in this case) gets an instant boost in his sex scale rating. He's a one and yet he won over a ten for crying out loud. He's good. He must have some hidden attribute we didn't know about. Maybe he's really good in bed. Maybe he was very clever. There has to be a reason.

Since mating with somebody of a different value than ourselves comes at a cost to one of the partners, and nobody wants to pursue somebody who is lower on the sex scale than themselves, mutually satisfying relationships tend to be amongst equals. However, and this is important – we are seen as

attractive to anybody who rates equal to or lower than us on the sex scale. Those that are lower see us as a prize catch.

There are several important messages here:

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genetically or socially, everybody will encounter sexual opportunity. Everybody.

– The first preference of both genders is to mate with the most genetically perfect being they are able (ten on the ten scale), followed immediately by those at the higher end (eight or above) of the gender specific sex

scale.

– We are seen as desirable to those that are either lower than or equal to our own rating on the sex scale. – The most opportunities for sex occur with partners

who are roughly equal on the sex scale.

– Wide imbalances in value between partners will result in reduced value for the higher ranking member. If you are seeking a higher value partner, this factor may weigh negatively on the other person's appraisal of you as a potential mate.

– While males are almost universally seeking genetic superiority (good looks) in a female and placing very little emphasis on social status, the female strategy also allows for consideration of social rank and

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cleverness to play major roles in her evaluation of potential sex partners. This is good news. These present the primary opportunities for males that weren't born genetically perfect to change their circumstances.

The Female Selection Process

Now let's get back to that thing about the female being the one who decides on which person to mate with. And recall that most males are going to hit on every attractive female they meet. This causes problems for an attractive female. They have lots of choices. They are getting hit on relentlessly, often hundreds of times a day, by hundreds of men.

Have a look around. If you see a pretty girl, there's a good chance that there's a guy lurking about nearby trying to make small talk and/or hit on her. In an office setting, you can see guys come and go to her desk all day long – all taking their chances, pretending to chit-chat while attempting to build rapport and make their moves. If an attractive woman publishes her photo on a social internet site, she can be literally overwhelmed with email from guys wanting to be her friend. How is she supposed to

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make a choice given all the available possibilities?

The female brain has evolved a solution for that problem as well. It's called the ”test”. This is where she finds out if you're a man or a wimp. Wimps need not apply. Males of obviously low status are most often simply ignored – as there are far too many of them for her to respond to and reject individually. A handful of potential suitors will get past this initial “ignore” filter and make it to the test.

The first part of the test is the initial body language

screening I alluded to earlier. This puts men into mental buckets of sexually desirable, interesting, possible friend, and loser/jerk. The vast majority of men that pursue her will never be seen as sexually desirable and get past this point – doomed to the “friend zone” (or worse) for eternity.

The next thing she is going to do is to challenge the male in various ways to reinforce the category she has chosen, and to weed out those that were possibly manipulative and managed to give off signals which put them into the wrong category. The test is usually designed to pick out those who seem confident and aggressive initially, but then turn out to be beta males who are merely imitating alpha male behaviour in order to have sex.

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Most of the time, she's really looking for an alpha male, except for the couple of days a month when the hot hunk with the perfect body [e.g. the genetically superior male] can sway her attention. He won't usually be tested thoroughly because physical genetic traits are difficult to counterfeit. The extremely clever male who uses cleverness as his sole approach will be tested brutally to see how well his cleverness holds up under pressure.

The test itself is usually a series of questions or scenarios, or subtle clues she's thrown out to see if you picked them up. A popular example is “How many women have you slept

with/dated?” If your answer is too low, she believes that you're a male of low status and will decide that you aren't worth her time. If it's too high, she'll think you're just a “player” and not worth her emotional risk. You are tasked with diffusing this question

(possibly by lying) to make it appear that you are highly experienced but not easy.

This is merely a variation of the cliché “Does this dress make me look fat?” You have to answer, you may even have to lie (but she'll know it) - so the best you can do is answer with dignity and grace and hope for the best.

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is that you've had somewhere between 5 and 8 relationships. Leave it at that. Don't mention anything that lasted less than six months. If you're a virgin, quickly ask how many guys she's slept with – and only say that she's slept with more people than you, while smiling. Hopefully this will diffuse the subject.

There are hundreds of test questions/scenarios and I can't give you all the answers. You might be asked if you've ever had a threesome or think her sister is cute, or what you think of saving baby whales or even how much you drink. She might ask if you actually remembered her name which she told you just minutes ago. She might ask about your favourite dish-washing detergent, just to find out if you've ever taken full responsibility for washing dishes. She might ask who provided your last haircut, to

determine if it was professionally cut or if you did it in a mirror to save money.

Often only she knows the “right” answers that are going to save your ass. You can only guess and pray. She is going to try and throw you a complete surprise to see how you react under pressure, and also to try and weed out anybody that reminds her of some male that let her down in the past. The correct answer is usually one which emphasises that you are stable and mature

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and don't try to shag every girl you meet; and also that you are a high status male and she is lucky to be talking to you, as you have plenty of other opportunities.

Just stay calm and do the best you can. If it was easy, any guy could say a few words and have sex with her. You need to prove you're the man that deserves her above all the others. Begging, pleading, getting flustered or upset, licking your lips, or starting to unzip your trousers generally means you've failed the test.

Now here's another fact that you need to know about the female brain. Unlike the male brain which is deeply rooted in logic, the female brain is rooted in feelings and emotions. Not everything a woman does will seem logical. I know some of you will say that nothing a woman does is logical, and you're probably not far from the truth.

But let's look at this from the viewpoint of attraction. For a woman to be attracted to a particular man, she needs to feel a deep connection to him. This is an emotional response. If she doesn't feel it, nothing is going to happen, and there's nothing a male can do to change it. You can buy her flowers, you can buy her a new car, you can pledge your eternal love for her, but you

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aren't going to have sex with her. Period. You're trying to appeal to her sense of logic, (thinking she'll choose you as a good

provider), but this simply isn't how her brain works.

Now that I've segued into buying flowers, let's talk about what turns women off. Remember that most of the time they are looking for the powerful male, the confident leader, the alpha male. How does an alpha male act around women? It's pretty simple. The alpha male is being pursued even more than the hot dude with the perfect genes, because he's the guy who's going to stick around and raise the kids. The alpha male does not chase women. He doesn't need to – as he is surrounded by sexual opportunities.

Got it? Any guy who buys flowers, buys dinner, pledges his eternal love, etc. on or before the first date is clearly not an alpha male. (Buy her dinner or flowers to reward her behaviour - after you've had sex.)

This is the “standard” dating process that most men have relied on for about the last hundred years, and it doesn't work. The standard dating process usually only results in mating when the female is either low status herself and cannot attract an alpha male to mate with, or she has been rejected by the alpha males

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in her life (perhaps due to psychological damage, excessive nagging, etc.) and succumbs to desperation.

The approval-seeking behaviours of the “standard” dating process are definitive signals that this is a beta (low status) male, and this person will either end up as just a friend or a loser to any woman of value (e.g. one that is able to mate with alpha males). Losers go into the loser “bucket” and are dismissed outright. Women occasionally keep friends around because they know that these men will keep buying them stuff, sometimes for years - hoping for sex in return. They're usually nice guys and all, and the girls are usually polite and nice to them, but they just don't make the girl feel attraction. Sound familiar?

The problem is that they can keep buying stuff until all their credit cards are maxed out, but they aren't going to get laid. They aren't on the “sexually interesting” list. Who can say no to

somebody buying them stuff? I wouldn't. Would you? No matter how nice they are, women feel nothing but disdain for these guys because they feel the men are trying to buy sex. Women who trade sex for money are called “whores”. It is not a term that any woman wears as a badge of honour and she will go out of her way to eliminate the perception that her body and/or affections

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can be bought. So they take the gifts and never reciprocate – although they might offer a smile or wink on occasion to keep the cash cow flowing. But make no mistake about it, “just a friend” means that you aren't fuckable.

Here's another reason not to shower her with gifts... By trying to sell yourself to her, and giving her stuff to convince her to accept – you are in essence paying her to buy into your goods (or perhaps services if you prefer). The result of this act is that your overall value is perceived as less than zero.

If I was to sell you something, and tell you that not only don't you have to pay anything for it, but I'll pay you to take it - would you? No way! The first thing you would think is that if this thing is so shoddy that I have to pay people to take it, it's less than worthless – likely to be nothing but trouble, and you'll

ultimately have to pay somebody else to get rid of it. Women are consummate shoppers and understand this concept clearly.

Let's figure out what factors (besides your skill or lack of it) might prevent you from getting the girl. These are the top

universal “blockers” which could completely prevent a relationship from developing.

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your fault but her insecurity could spoil your chances.

2. If she does not trust you or believe that you will stick around after sex

3. Fear of pregnancy and/or disease

You can address all of these concerns – and if they

become issues you will need to. First, never comment negatively about her body if you ever want to have sex with her. You can comment negatively about her fashion or her choice of friends or most anything else – even her haircut is open to ridicule, but her body is always sexy. If it isn't - you shouldn't be trying to have sex with her.

If you have no desire to stick around after you shag her, if she's just a one night stand in your eyes - tell her so. Be honest. She may not want to play, but at least if she does she'll know the rules. People may not always agree with brutal honesty, but they always respect it. You might in fact be surprised at her reaction. She might be relieved that you aren't interested in a long-term relationship and all the life complications and misery that might involve.

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pregnancy and disease concern. She may wish to feel you “skin-to-skin” and damn the torpedoes - but if you aren't prepared, the only thing you're going to feel tonight is your hand spanking the monkey.

Another thing that is going to land a male in the loser bucket is if he is not paying attention at all to her body language and approaches with the intent of mating before she has

indicated her selection of him as a potential mate, or if her appraisal was negative and he failed to notice (or interpret correctly) her obvious signals that quite clearly he is not, and will never be the chosen one.

An alpha male will know instinctively how to interpret these signals and will be watching for them. What else will the alpha male do to signal his leadership and superiority? I'm glad you asked. There is a huge behaviour difference between dominant males and subservient males. The first and foremost trait exhibited by the powerful male is self confidence, followed by self-esteem, and both of these contribute to self-worth. A bit of humour and teasing are quite common and have been mentioned by women as very desirable traits in their partners. Several

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laugh - and although there is much more to it than that, you can't go wrong by knowing how to tickle their funny bone.

The alpha will never plead or beg – and in fact will act as if he could care less if a woman has sex with him. It's no big deal, as he knows that even if he doesn't have sex with her, there are many other opportunities open for him to explore. All of these traits are visible by the way they carry themselves – their body language.

A dominant male will also usually have resources (e.g. money, power, status) and these will show in his appearance, grooming, and style. This is not to say that he adorns himself with obscene amounts of bling – which is a beta trait; but he may tend to dress in clothes or surround himself with adornments that are beyond the reach of your typical discount shopper.

A common criticism of women in general is that they tend to say one thing and do the exact opposite. Are they all

pathological liars? No – you just have to go back and remember how they think. This is the result of that emotional mindset, again based on feelings.

What women say is a result of their internal dialogue which is coming from the logical part of the brain. It is interesting, but

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totally irrelevant to their actions. What they do ultimately shows how they feel, and therefore how they feel is the only thing that is important, because it is guiding their actions. She might tell you that she hates chocolate ice cream, at the same time she's eating a bucket of it. In fact she might actually hate it, but eating it gives her a good feeling – and so she will continue to eat it no matter what her logical brain says.

In her brain there is no conflict. Just because a course of action might be logical doesn't mean that it will control her behaviour. Always watch her actions if you want to know how she truly feels. She says she prefers sensitive men, but then has sex with guys that behave more like wild animals - all ego and power. Sure, it's logical for her to like sensitive men. It makes perfect sense. But wild men affect her feelings. That's what kicks the attraction trigger, and when she wants sex, she doesn't give one hoot about logic - she's looking for the guy that affects her feelings.

One more factor which many men overlook in their dealings with women is that the hunter-gatherer lifestyle also embedded a deep level of female camaraderie into her genetic make-up. The women stayed back at “camp” together while the

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men went off hunting; mostly alone or in small packs. This carries through to the present. Women's relationship with their female peers is much more important than their relationship with the current male in her life. Keep this in mind whenever you think of merging a woman's life with your own – and even if your intent is just to do this for a short time. How you relate to her friends may be just as important as how you relate to her. Without their

approval, she will be hesitant to bring you into her life. You can also make use of these friends of hers.

Remember - women talk. She might be the woman you're dating, but they are her network. Use it to your advantage. Think viral marketing. If you're the best guy she's ever known (and you soon will be), she is going to blab to all her friends. They in turn will blab to all of their friends. Soon you will be legendary and women far and wide will know about you and be curious to meet you. For this reason you must guard your reputation zealously. If you come across to a woman as a complete jerk – this news will also spread virally throughout her network.

Programming The Mind

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just like a computer can be programmed - if it isn't performing in the desired manner and achieving the desired results. It can also be hacked into and manipulated. The process is a bit different than with computers. You've been programming your brain all your life, though you might just call it learning.

The best way to learn something is to think about it over and over again – or for mechanical skills, to do them over and over again. Through repetition your mind becomes trained to recall or perform the pattern. The brain actually grows new neural connections and thought pathways. This is how you learned multiplication tables or how to play a musical instrument.

To re-program the brain is only slightly more complicated. You still need to learn the new pattern, but you also need to replace or remove the old pattern which you don't desire to repeat any more. You can start by simply repeating to yourself that the new method is better and you don't need to do the old one any more.

For long standing patterns, behaviours, addictions, etc. it sometimes helps to use more advanced mind programming techniques, such as hypnosis, meditation, and NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming).

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The first two work by relaxing your conscious mind before repeating the desired outcome, as your conscious mind often gets in the way and throws up obstacles to doing something differently than you've done before. NLP is a bit harder to pin down, but in the manner we're discussing basically uses your imagination to create vivid imagery in order to perform the desired task.

An example of this would be to imagine your old behaviour (which you are trying to re-program) being written/drawn on an imaginary sheet of paper. Feel the emotions of that behaviour and also attach them to the imaginary paper. The colours, the smells, the feelings, the entire experience. On another imaginary sheet of paper, write down or draw the new (desired) behaviour and imagine all of the emotions or feelings associated with it. Now inside your mind, wad up the old paper and throw it away, while replacing it with the new one – which is now in front of you. If you imagine this repeatedly, you will achieve the desired

outcome.

Perhaps the most well known NLP technique is called

anchoring, in which some action is made to happen as a person

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repeated, it can trigger the feeling or emotional state to which it was anchored. This is the reason that certain smells or certain songs can bring back vivid memories of past emotional events. They are anchors for those events – though anchors can take many forms and involve any of the senses.

The term “Neuro Linguistic Programming” actually pre-dates the use of creative imagery and in fact refers to a process of using language or speech (linguistics) to affect neurons – which is also the basis for hypnosis. It refers to the fact that human neurons (and in fact the entire mind and body) generally respond to spoken commands, whether spoken internally or externally. Read that again and let it soak in. We'll come back to it.

All of these programming techniques can be practised at home, and you are quite capable of performing them. If you feel this would be helpful in your personal growth, have a look on the internet for meditation or hypnosis CD's/MP3's, or NLP scripts relevant to the specific goal that you are trying to achieve. There are thousands of these. Some are free. The better ones require payment, but the price is usually reasonable and they are often worth every penny. Whatever approach you take, repeat it over

Seduction

Seduction

Copyright © 2010

Mike Macgirvin

New South Wales, Australia

All Rights Reserved.

Table of Contents

Introduction

Part I

The Animal Kingdom

Attraction

The Mating Ritual

Body Language

The Alpha Male

Social Proof

Female Sexual Strategy

Cleverness

The Sex Scale

The Female Selection Process

Programming The Mind